I would EXCELSIOR, but I haven't got a ZING to LOL

Ask and you shall receive:

https://www.amazon.ca/Great-gift-celebrate-Sacrament-Reconciliation/dp/B0062QVQQS

Don't forget to put your notes of remorse under your pillow so the contrition bear will leave you a dollar reward, Billy

Paws for contemplation

The ichthys is a nice touch, very polysemous.

Art Bears similarly took their name from a passage in some old book which was using the verb form of bears

Does a bear fruit in the woods

When does the ritual begin?

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EKecB54UEAMioqV.jpg

https://www.ganduridinierusalim.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/09/calugari_monahi_ursi_animale.jpg

a kind ilxor has webmailed me and explained

reminds me of those terrible middle school days, when everyone always exploded in laughter when the teacher said some the word "dry", or "wet", or "hard", or "soft", and i didn't have any clue why anyone was laughing. except, imagine if back then a friend could text you and be like "dude, it's dry vaginas and hard penises, dude"

Certain passages not even that important, nonetheless it Bears repeating

it's like when I turn on the dawnzer and it gives off a lee light

Wait karl i literally explained as soon as you asked my man

What did your man say?

Well you know what your man is like sher

listen to what the amn says

you post contrition bear after you have filled a thread will jigglepandas

*with

1 Our Father, 3 Hail Marys, and 10 minutes in the cage with Contrition Bear

(It is also a Faraday cage to block Satan's 5g signal)

ITT we study the ways of our dear friend The Contrition Bear

bear say go in peace to me

https://media2.giphy.com/media/4iV6quWypxgcg/source.gif

Wild

oh contritionpaws

Contrition bear and his counterpart gigglepanda

I take it Will Jigglepandas is the Christopher Robin of the contrition bear mythos.

I always picture a little ursine figure frantically disco-dancing in his room when the Bee Gees sing "It's hard to bear..."

(the pathos of my imagery leaves the thread mute)

(bear thread left threadbare)

Tears pooling into ursine wells

@ Neanderthal - the "dawnzer" scene in whatever Ramona book is such a great evocation of childhood confusion about things.

Lol yes. I loved Ramona

Paws for contemplation

That made me snort in the car then I had to get into a whole a I CAN'T EXPLAIN WHY IT'S FUNNY thing with my wife.

Contrition Bear also reminding me of Billy Connolly being confused at hymn practice when they sang about "Gladly the cross-eyed bear"

then I had to get into a whole a I CAN'T EXPLAIN WHY IT'S FUNNY thing with my wife.

This happens to me all the time.

The idea of hymn practice is amusing me rn.

Ach theres no new jokes only them deployed again right

Billy reading robbie burns came up last night when i was drifting off, oh it was nice

reminds me of those terrible middle school days, when everyone always exploded in laughter when the teacher said some the word "dry", or "wet", or "hard", or "soft", and i didn't have any clue why anyone was laughing. except, imagine if back then a friend could text you and be like "dude, it's dry vaginas and hard penises, dude"

in grade 4 my teacher got exasperated with everyone saying "just a sec! just a sec!" when she asked us to come to the round table. She stood up and yelled "NO MORE SECS!" and it was the best day of the year, even she was laughing

We had a big highlight one day when someone mentioned cats and the (redheaded) English teacher told us she had a "big ginger pussy" - looking back it probably wasn't the hysterical and unintentional slip we thought it was.

mrs_slocombe.jpg

.jpg

Tears pooling into ursine wells

― Ole Blueyes Solskjaer (darraghmac), Monday, January 11, 2021 4:28 PM (yesterday) bookmarkflaglink

F for Flag

God, the one that will always get me was when we learned how to make a salad in home ec in 7th grade, and our teacher— a 6'2" woman with immense hair who wore too much make-up named Mrs. Hazeltine— kept on going on and on about "this is how you toss a salad, toss the salad gently and with a lot of care" and it just became this thing where the boys would ask every week if we were going to be tossing salads in class and she would always ask incredulously, "why would we toss a salad today, boys?" It still makes me giggle.

have i mentioned how much i love this thread title

NSFW https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bear_Surprise

Now that reminds me of our classic bearotaur vs sharktopus thread

have i mentioned how much i love this thread title

― Two Meter Peter (Ste)

it is great, it's fun to say/think

/sing

i am the author of this thread title and i regret it because it is stuck in my head forever now

haha I def sing it to myself

local eire man (darraghmac) wrote this on thread everybody on ilx complains about reddit on board I Love Everything on 12-Jan-2015

but wouldnt it have been an honour a privilege

derail- first time ms mac met my best friend he got drunk and had to be driven home (several miles along some serious back roads in a pink seicento that was my carriage at the time) and every now and again hed wake up in the back and rear up into the front singing that couplet and on the fourth or fifth time she took off her shoe and rained several sincere thumps down upon his head and i thought youre the one for me fatty