What goes less mentioned is that Stonewall was just two years old at the time, and when the first pride parade—then known as the Christopher Street Liberation Day March—was held the following year, the bar had already shut down after timidly limiting its drink selection to juices. The space became a bagel shop, a Chinese restaurant, and a shoe store until its current iteration opened in 1990. As much as Stonewall galvanized the gay community, that community navigated both its 1970s heyday and the apocalyptic throes of the AIDS crisis without it. Pride finds a way....
“Circuit parties [gay raves] and parades are thriving. Grindr isn’t killing them and Grindr isn’t killing gay bars. Boredom is,” posits Daniel Nardicio, an impresario of gay nightlife in New York who also runs his own gay bar and cabaret, Club Cumming, with actor Alan Cumming. “Ooh, you have drag bingo? Drag brunch? Drag karaoke? Stop. Give me something new, not just a rainbow on a bottle of Absolut or a retirement home cliché hosted by a drag queen.”
Even as gay bars have ridden the acclaimed historic visibility of television shows including RuPaul’s Drag Race and Pose, they’ve merely become “vessels for viewing parties” of those shows, adds Nardicio.
Gay bars are “stuck,” he says, and he has a theory about why.
“AIDS killed lots of artists and free spirits, but it also killed people who would’ve grown up to become mentors to everyone under 50 now. We grew up alone and without that sense of connection across generations. We lost them, and we’ve paid the price by slipping from the creative class to the consumer class. We went from radical to basic.” “Basic,” according to the Urban Dictionary of American slang, is one “only interested in things mainstream, popular, and trending.” Consider how derivative 2019 queer culture seems compared with 1967. Gay liberation pulls its punches....
In contrast to broad LGBTQ acceptance by the mainstream, queer culture itself has fought and fractured internally largely along racial lines. The idea of a united gay community in 2019 is as much a fantasy as there ever was for a demographic group whose sole uniting factor is sexual preference and societal marginalization—not, say, age, creed, career, class, color, health, or regionalism, the identities around which Americans often coalesce. So as gay bars embrace bachelorettes and other straight audiences even as they tell trans women they “aren’t real women,” or assert that centering blackness too much is “not good for the businesses,” there is actually more of a need for more vulnerable members of the queer spectrum to have spaces that feel safe to them, and exclusively for them.
https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2019-06-28/the-american-gay-bar-is-down-but-don-t-count-it-out-just-yet
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 3 July 2019 14:25 (four years ago) link
totally agreeso much basic it's shit i always say i wish i had grown up in new york in the 80s....without all the death.
― surm, Wednesday, 3 July 2019 15:59 (four years ago) link
gratified to seem some grousing about the gross corporate hedonism of pride parades, cuz I was starting to feel like a homophobe last weekend for having similar thoughts
― Οὖτις, Wednesday, 3 July 2019 16:03 (four years ago) link
are you kidding? half my contemporaries are morons, sorry ya shits
― surm, Wednesday, 3 July 2019 16:04 (four years ago) link
it's a miracle i found any gay friends in this city tbh
They don't come more basic than me, sorry to say.
― Pauline Male (Eric H.), Wednesday, 3 July 2019 16:05 (four years ago) link
waitaminit, surm are you in SF?!
― Οὖτις, Wednesday, 3 July 2019 16:07 (four years ago) link
you're high-end basic, dear
xp
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 3 July 2019 16:07 (four years ago) link
omg no i wish! in NYC, sorry if i confused you!and Eric i beg to differ. you have a big heart. that's p unbasic, shocking as that may be.
― surm, Wednesday, 3 July 2019 16:08 (four years ago) link
btw Happy Roundnumber Birthday, Eric!
The only thing I remember about the summer of '79 is I saw a double bill of Animal House and Putney Swope at my hometown theater.
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 3 July 2019 16:13 (four years ago) link
Round number and rounder midsection!
― Pauline Male (Eric H.), Wednesday, 3 July 2019 16:44 (four years ago) link
all part of the otter to bear transformation
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 3 July 2019 17:16 (four years ago) link
I'm having Jake over tonightThere's a real spark there!He's adorable and sexy af and I'm a little bit pinching myself!!!!
― surm, Friday, 5 July 2019 21:22 (four years ago) link
Jake Ryan?
― Pauline Male (Eric H.), Friday, 5 July 2019 21:35 (four years ago) link
Lol noooooJake with the floppy hair who lives on my street and wants to watch horror movies with me!!!!!
― surm, Friday, 5 July 2019 21:40 (four years ago) link
damn, see what I miss by hating horror movies
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Friday, 5 July 2019 22:35 (four years ago) link
:P he let me top and now I want a burger
― surm, Saturday, 6 July 2019 06:21 (four years ago) link
Horror movies, topping and burgers?! Keep that one!
― Pauline Male (Eric H.), Saturday, 6 July 2019 13:38 (four years ago) link
Omg right
― surm, Saturday, 6 July 2019 14:44 (four years ago) link
hooked up with a dude at a wedding I attended -- Brooklyn's good for that sort of thing
― TikTok to the (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Saturday, 6 July 2019 15:19 (four years ago) link
Lol Brooklyn is so slutty. What did he look like?! Give us the deets
― surm, Saturday, 6 July 2019 17:33 (four years ago) link
I don't get nuthin in Brooklyn
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Sunday, 7 July 2019 05:29 (four years ago) link
I feel lost that I haven't had my fill of Manhattan gays everAm I missing much?This guy I was seeing recently gave me a dispassionate goodbye and I figured we came to parting ways but he texted last nightI'm gonna make him wait a few days before I respond.
― surm, Sunday, 7 July 2019 12:20 (four years ago) link
I shaved my balls while listening to The Hidden Cameras this morning. Don't really care for the song that much but I really like the lyrics:
Hunting hair to find emotional graceI am scared you'll see my body and knowThat removing hair has taken over my lifeAnd I don't know how to stop
I want another enema, nema, nemaGood waste is an oxymoron, moron, moronMy body is an exit wound, oh my wounds, oh my woundsI want another enema, nema, nema
― flamboyant goon tie included, Sunday, 7 July 2019 19:26 (four years ago) link
hairless balls make me sad
― J0rdan S., Sunday, 7 July 2019 21:02 (four years ago) link
they also make you itch
― TikTok to the (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Sunday, 7 July 2019 21:17 (four years ago) link
I flip-flop on whether or not I'm a man who is crotch-hairy or crotch-shaven but usually it's just a once-a-year thing when it gets hot. I am rollerblading a lot these days, speaking of gay. I went 13 km yesterday, with my shirt off.
― flamboyant goon tie included, Sunday, 7 July 2019 23:42 (four years ago) link
video or it didn't happen
when I had my stem-cell transplant my crotch hair fell out and frankly it was traumatic
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Monday, 8 July 2019 02:02 (four years ago) link
OmgThat so isI had a traumatic incident with hair removal last summer so this year I'm committed to being a total caveman beard and all
― surm, Monday, 8 July 2019 02:15 (four years ago) link
It doesn't need to be shaved to the skin for me, but I am no fan of a briar patch down there.
― Pauline Male (Eric H.), Monday, 8 July 2019 02:36 (four years ago) link
Ok admittedly I did trim yesterday
― surm, Monday, 8 July 2019 02:39 (four years ago) link
But like just the essentials
― surm, Monday, 8 July 2019 02:40 (four years ago) link
but Eric, it adds so much mystery
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Monday, 8 July 2019 02:41 (four years ago) link
Save that bush for Jessica Fletcher.
― Pauline Male (Eric H.), Monday, 8 July 2019 02:45 (four years ago) link
BaahhhahhahhahahahhhhahahahahahaShe was (obv) just on my TV today
― surm, Monday, 8 July 2019 02:46 (four years ago) link
I find that pouring gin over the pubes causes them to gasp and self-immolate.
― TikTok to the (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Monday, 8 July 2019 02:54 (four years ago) link
I love my boyfriend so much! We watched the pilot for Pose over dinner at his suggestion and it was weird and sad and beautiful and cheesy and I kissed him after dinner and it was so nice
We are going to Berlin for a vacation at the end of the month, what should we do? A friend is putting us up in Mitte
― flamboyant goon tie included, Monday, 8 July 2019 03:05 (four years ago) link
Yesss we have been watching pose tooIt's a v strong show
― surm, Monday, 8 July 2019 03:32 (four years ago) link
you guysi did not feel strong about my sensual encounter yesterday
― surm, Tuesday, 9 July 2019 15:08 (four years ago) link
Last night I watched the Press Your Luck reboot with my BF and it seemed like the right thing to be doing.
― Pauline Male (Eric H.), Tuesday, 9 July 2019 15:31 (four years ago) link
how long have you guys been together?
― surm, Tuesday, 9 July 2019 16:55 (four years ago) link
More than 3 years, somehow! (We were friends for 7+ years before that though.)
― Pauline Male (Eric H.), Tuesday, 9 July 2019 16:59 (four years ago) link
<3 :+) :+)
― surm, Tuesday, 9 July 2019 17:02 (four years ago) link
The real bummer about this set-up, and one which has set up a fairly big potential landmine up for us both, is that we respect each other too much as friends to actually go through with some of the fights that I think it's necessary to have with a significant other. (Not all of them; we have fought. Just not with the id fully unsheathed.)
― Pauline Male (Eric H.), Tuesday, 9 July 2019 17:24 (four years ago) link
necessary fights = why i have avoided having a S.O.
No Drama Morbama
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, 9 July 2019 17:26 (four years ago) link
You'll note I've started a tad fewer pointless fights on ILX these last few years.
― Pauline Male (Eric H.), Tuesday, 9 July 2019 17:27 (four years ago) link
i do know what u meanconflict avoidance can backfirebut honestly sounds lovely!
― surm, Tuesday, 9 July 2019 17:33 (four years ago) link
Possibly controversial belief alert, but relationship fights, I think, are a useful tool in helping people better themselves.
― Pauline Male (Eric H.), Tuesday, 9 July 2019 17:35 (four years ago) link
they take a huge toll on me, but admittedlysometimes they have made me grow(in a big way)currently reading "why buddhism is true"i like it!!!
― surm, Tuesday, 9 July 2019 19:20 (four years ago) link
i like to grow alone
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Tuesday, 9 July 2019 19:22 (four years ago) link
mediocre is often good enough.
not ready to start a fall thread yet (maybe cuz it's 89 F in NYC today) but i can't think of a good title.
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Monday, 23 September 2019 16:39 (four years ago) link
fuck. so ready for 65 degrees.
― surm, Monday, 23 September 2019 16:45 (four years ago) link
ummm also Alfred that's a really good tip
xp from my own post in the "nobody goes to the theater" thread but i love this musical and wish everyone would give it a listen so:
The OST for the outrageously good and crazy wordy "A Strange Loop" came out today - described by the Liz Phair loving playwright/composer as a musical about a black, fat, queer, effeminate theater nerd searching for meaning by writing a musical about a black, fat, queer, effeminate theater nerd who writes a musical about a black, fat, queer, effeminate theater nerd searching for meaning - and it's great.Author is Michael (r) Jackson, so he names the lead of his roman a clef "Usher" and he's an usher at a Disney show. Highly recommended!https://open.spotify.com/album/7vlAmEdZEOVdRUsB4fgrvC?si=1MkKwKxrSPKsLgS_qkobmg
Author is Michael (r) Jackson, so he names the lead of his roman a clef "Usher" and he's an usher at a Disney show. Highly recommended!https://open.spotify.com/album/7vlAmEdZEOVdRUsB4fgrvC?si=1MkKwKxrSPKsLgS_qkobmg
― Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Friday, 27 September 2019 16:56 (four years ago) link
"Inwood Daddy," in context, is fucking devastating
― Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Friday, 27 September 2019 17:02 (four years ago) link
Ahhh hahahah that sounds so awesome!!
― fgti (flamboyant goon tie included), Friday, 27 September 2019 17:37 (four years ago) link
i think you'll love it fgti, kinda has your name on it; would love to see you and jackson collabo.
― Fuck the NRA (ulysses), Friday, 27 September 2019 17:43 (four years ago) link
so i just started getting furniture in my bach pad feels so gooood
― surm, Wednesday, 9 October 2019 15:29 (four years ago) link
including the waterbed?
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 9 October 2019 15:45 (four years ago) link
ha that would be the day
― surm, Wednesday, 9 October 2019 15:49 (four years ago) link
summer is over, queers
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 9 October 2019 15:51 (four years ago) link
THANK GOD
― surm, Wednesday, 9 October 2019 16:11 (four years ago) link
Do not accept.
― Pauline Male (Eric H.), Wednesday, 9 October 2019 16:37 (four years ago) link
are you saying we need a new thread morbzy?
― surm, Wednesday, 9 October 2019 16:42 (four years ago) link
i have a really unpopular title ready, so beat me to it
― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, 9 October 2019 16:55 (four years ago) link
No please share.
― Pauline Male (Eric H.), Wednesday, 9 October 2019 17:34 (four years ago) link
Hurry up and make the thread I have sumthin to say
― i could chug a keg of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Wednesday, 9 October 2019 17:42 (four years ago) link
https://66.media.tumblr.com/d1b2b986c8e1ef88e9f1f57f29725a01/tumblr_p542ecSrAK1tstd16o2_250.gif
― Pauline Male (Eric H.), Wednesday, 9 October 2019 18:34 (four years ago) link
Oh no, I was posting that in a Jazmine Masters voice
― i could chug a keg of you (flamboyant goon tie included), Wednesday, 9 October 2019 18:37 (four years ago) link
--- - Oop
― Pauline Male (Eric H.), Wednesday, 9 October 2019 18:38 (four years ago) link
Canceling Ellen and the NFL: QUEER FALL of 2019
― Pauline Male (Eric H.), Wednesday, 9 October 2019 18:39 (four years ago) link