lord custos tribute thread

Get it? Two... packs.

please someone make the facebook musical thread stop please

so bad!!

if tom locks that thread i will forgive him for everything he did yesterday

is there any more heinous a Custosian crime, as when Marcello and chums imitate Bobby Gillespie for the nth time, like they were writing the jokes column from an early-90s NME?

oh god so OTM

for brits maybe

that one goes right over my head

is there any more heinous a Custosian crime, as when Marcello and chums imitate Bobby Gillespie for the nth time, like they were writing the jokes column from an early-90s NME?

― graft Veronica's limbless torso to the 'paalmino' pony called Juno (stevie), Monday, 6 October 2008 11:26 (5 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

Seriously.

"The Ludacris Foundation"
Message Bookmarked
Dubplatestyle: The Hip-Hop Summit Action Network and Pepsi have come to an agreement,
averting Tuesday's (Feb. 11) boycott. Pepsi, the Ludacris Foundation &
Rush Arts have agreed to a multi-year, multi-million dollar partnership to
support the arts in communities at risk. "We hope Pepsi's investment
inspires other companies to invest more in grassroots programs as opposed
to some bureaucracies who aren't always effective," Russell Simmons told
AllHipHop.com.
joel facelift: haha um
joel facelift: the ludacris foundation??
Dubplatestyle: haha i know!
joel facelift: the foundation for throwing bows
joel facelift: for the furtherment of rough sex
Dubplatestyle: the foundation for the advancement of the global sex village

― jess (dubplatestyle), Monday, February 10, 2003 7:32 PM (5 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
the foundation for compatible titties and ass.

― Ronan (Ronan), Monday, February 10, 2003 7:34 PM (5 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
Ah, the joys of this spam. I wondered at this as well.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Monday, February 10, 2003 7:35 PM (5 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
Luda cares for his hoes/foundation gives 'em ho-mes/get off tha streets/I throw you a bone/It ain't hopeless, like I'm never ho-less/keep the peace/and satisfy my whore-mones/fuck the ho-lice/eatin' doublized portions/gettin' fat off doughnuts/from tim whore-tons/Luda save souls/with a charity foundation/and bacheler's recreation/headquarted off whore-land heights/where I keep my interns/up all night/return the favor/they mouths full of ludacris flavor!

ahem.

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Tuesday, February 11, 2003 1:58 AM (5 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
ahem.

― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Tuesday, February 11, 2003 1:35 PM (5 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

*cough*

ahem.

awkward silence

KRS-One had the right idea, but he was a bit too crazed. I prefer Michael Franti of the DHH. He's Jello Biafra with a tan!

-- Lord Custos X, Friday, June 14, 2002 12:00 AM (4 years ago) Bookmark Link

― and what, Monday, May 28, 2007 11:23 AM (1 year ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/washington/2008/06/barack-obama-jo.html

Norquist dropped by The Times' Washington bureau today and, as part of his negative critique of Obama's liberal stances on economic issues and other matters, he termed the presumptive Democratic presidential nominee "John Kerry with a tan."

I told her I ain't so sure
about this place
it's hard to play a gig in this town
and keep a straight face
seems like everyone here's got a plan
it's kind of like nashville with a tan, but,
everything's gonna be all right
rockabye, rockabye
everything's gonna be all right
rockabye, rockabye

My question is: 'Did Kevin Faeces put the ice-cream in the bacon?'

― funky house septic (haitch), Monday, 27 October 2008 23:53 (28 seconds ago) Bookmark

surely not quasi-racist enough

Tupac will release a new single on Halloween describing his past relationship with Obama and how Obama murdered him. I got the bootleg already:

(To be sung by Tupac)

Back in the days, me and and Barry used to roll dice;
on the corner betting quarters sippin orange slice.

Then O got big went to law school;
befrending Jews; learnin rules; writin law reviews.

The other day I say a poster with my man Barack;
On the same corner where we smoked ---- and sold rocks.

I can't beleeeeve; My man made it so faaarrrr;
we used hustle now his muscle's in Patrol Caarrrs.

Till now ya'll thought my murder was a mystereeee;
How could it beeee; when it was all plain to seeee; how can I rest in peeeeace.

It wasn't Kevin, it wasn't no Mac-11; It was a brother named Barack with a silver glock... (gunshots...fadeout).

--

Lame, but I couldn't help myself.

DM

Posted by laborlibert | October 30, 2008 11:23 AM

Fight Club 1910 (A Masterpiece Theatre/Merchant and Ivory Production)

yo i put a flexfit foie gras through the dishwasher with one of those anal sex cages and the shit never was the same

dont be a cheap ass, just buy a new fucking goose and have more than one favorite dish, you got to switch your style up, that way you always looking fresh

fuck blowing a goose

- j0hn d

I think there should be genres called:

applecore - although I hear it's rotten
lamppost - some people say that you can't dance to it, but the secret is to stand completely still

There are also offshoots:

applecorelamppost - difficult music to play, as people are always complaining about the balance and the requirement for musicians to be very tall
applecorecore - started by the people who were the original applecorers, who subsequently got fed up with the rampant commercialism of applecore
postlamppost - sounds like what you get if you remove the lamppost from lamppost, basically silence to which the dancers flail around madly
lampapple - not to be confused with lamb papal, where people dress up as the pope and chant baaaahhhh

These different genres have all been collected together under the umbrella term "rubbish". So, for example, you will here a musician claim that their band plays "applecore on a rubbish tip".

― snoball, Wednesday, November 19, 2008 1:34 PM (10 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

what in the world

jeez

Straight outta Deutschland, crazy motherfucker named Florian/From the gang called Kraftwerk/When I'm called off, I got a bicycle/Run your ass over, and bodies are hauled off/You too, boy, if ya fuck with me/Die Polizei are gonna hafta come and get me/Off yo ass, that's how I'm goin out/For the punk motherfuckers that's showin out/Bavarians start to mumble, they wanna rumble/Mix em and cook em in a pot like sausage/Goin off on a motherfucker like that with a gat that's pointed at yo ass/So give it up smooth/Ain't no tellin when I'm down for a jack move/Here's a murder rap to keep yo dancin with a crime record like Baader Meinhof/The Uzi is the tool/Don't make me act the motherfuckin fool/Me you can go toe to toe, no maybe/I'm knockin 'varians out tha box, daily yo weekly, monthly and yearly/until them dumb motherfuckers see clearly/that I'm down with the capital DST/Boy you can't fuck with me/So when I'm in your neighborhood, you better duck/Coz Florian is crazy as fuck/As I leave, believe I'm stompin but when I come back, boy/I'm comin straight outta Deutschland/Peace.

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― Todd Burns, Tuesday, March 5, 2002 5:00 PM Bookmark

Seriously though, it's getting to the point where the word "Lapland" is synonymous with "rip off shite"...

person A: "So how's that second hand car you bought?"
person B: "Disaster, I got Laplanded..."

― snoball, Saturday, 6 December 2008 18:05 (8 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

And don't get me started about Lapland Dancing Clubs...

― snoball, Saturday, 6 December 2008 18:06 (8 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

You can look at the reindeer, but if you do any more than that, the elves throw you out into the street. Meanwhile, in the VIP room, there's blatant drug use. People are candy caning it.

― snoball, Saturday, 6 December 2008 18:13 (48 seconds ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

Thread should really be named "rolling snoball post thread"

Straight outta Deutschland, crazy motherfucker named Florian/From the gang called Kraftwerk/When I'm called off, I got a bicycle/Run your ass over, and bodies are hauled off/You too, boy, if ya fuck with me/Die Polizei are gonna hafta come and get me/Off yo ass, that's how I'm goin out/For the punk motherfuckers that's showin out/Bavarians start to mumble, they wanna rumble/Mix em and cook em in a pot like sausage/Goin off on a motherfucker like that with a gat that's pointed at yo ass/So give it up smooth/Ain't no tellin when I'm down for a jack move/Here's a murder rap to keep yo dancin with a crime record like Baader Meinhof/The Uzi is the tool/Don't make me act the motherfuckin fool/Me you can go toe to toe, no maybe/I'm knockin 'varians out tha box, daily yo weekly, monthly and yearly/until them dumb motherfuckers see clearly/that I'm down with the capital DST/Boy you can't fuck with me/So when I'm in your neighborhood, you better duck/Coz Florian is crazy as fuck/As I leave, believe I'm stompin but when I come back, boy/I'm comin straight outta Deutschland/Peace.

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― Todd Burns, Tuesday, March 5, 2002 5:00 PM Bookmark

this is pretty funny

The Conservative Toby Keith

Oh, and Cutty suggested Fight! (Fight Club 1910, the Musical)

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Saturday, February 12, 2005 9:33 PM (3 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

nice one cutty!

Okay but please help me get this straight. Kermit has a problem with being green. Right? But his nephew Robin can't even climb the stairs. Is that what I'm getting here? I mean oh my god, what a tragic family of mental illness.

― Can't Get The Gin If You're Not Plugged In (Bimble), Sunday, January 11, 2009 5:44 PM (5 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

With Bimble, I do wonder if he's completely serious.

Kermit, email me.

I mean oh my god, what a tragic family of mental illness.

...

is it gothic? i think i could go for a gothic 50 cent album, it would suit his drawled delivery.

"I don't know what you heard about me/
but I'm a motherfucking U.N.D.E.R.T.A.K.E.R"

― Jay-Kid (Jay-Kid), Thursday, February 3, 2005 2:11 PM (3 years ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

What's it all about, Alfie the 13-year-old father?

custos holocaust

Holocust

that was a missed opportunity but humour is basically ruined for me at present

don't dare to look at ecnomomy musical thread tbh

its a comic book about comic books.

― Comic Book Morbius (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, February 18, 2009 3:33 PM (18 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

This isn't entirely accurate. It's also a comic about individually wrapped sugar cubes.

― Magdalen Goobers (Oilyrags), Wednesday, 18 February 2009 21:53 (45 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
it is a comic about the glum zinger in the penultimate panel on every other page.

― Fox Force Five Punchline (sexyDancer), Wednesday, 18 February 2009 21:58 (41 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
It's a comic about lesbians buying porn.

― kingfish, Wednesday, 18 February 2009 22:00 (39 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
it's about an alternate reality in which people really do smoke tobacco out of crack pipes.

― Fox Force Five Punchline (sexyDancer), Wednesday, 18 February 2009 22:06 (32 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
its about things that are owl-shaped

― contenderizer, Wednesday, 18 February 2009 22:06 (32 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
It's about the button holding down your right epaulet coming undone.

― Magdalen Goobers (Oilyrags), Wednesday, 18 February 2009 22:20 (19 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink
It's about a giant fake space vagina.

― chap, Wednesday, 18 February 2009 22:33 (5 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

yall is dilutinatin what lord custos tribute thread was supposed to be about

that post doesnt have any html begin/end tags, made-up dialogue, a white guy talkin rap slang, or the courier font

get back 2 me when u see some of that otherwise keep ur anger at bad joeks to ur damn self

point taken, tho 'anger is overstating it

y'all are confusing custos-specific lolz with general ilx gaywaddery

― strongohulkington, Friday, April 27, 2007 4:54 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

whenever old custos threads get revived it takes me a sec to remember that dude was a real poster and not a challops-esque meme

and not JUST a challops-esque meme i guess

i am on a couple of e-mail lists filled with people i went to college with that feature nothing but custos humor

y'all are confusing custos-specific lolz with general ilx gaywaddery

― strongohulkington, Friday, April 27, 2007 4:54 PM (1 year ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

Like I said, can't we have "rolling snoball thread"?

oh man

(xpost) how about "no"?

can't we have "rolling snoball thread"?

no.

custos is real