Is it bad for a baby to see you masturbating?

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!!

Tracer Hand (tracerhand), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 16:59 (eighteen years ago) link

OK THIS THREAD.

Sick Mouthy (Nick Southall), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 17:00 (eighteen years ago) link

It's just part of life:

Why it happens

Toddlers masturbate for the same reason that older children do: It feels good! Bodily exploration is part of growing up. During the toddler years, your child will learn to run, jump, throw, pump a swing, draw, and (probably) "make all her poops in the potty." She may be just as curious about her genitals as she is about her fingers, toes, and belly button — and if she's recently switched from diapers to underpants, she may be able to get to them for the first time. "When parents first see this kind of exploration, they wonder 'is this normal?'" says Meg Zweiback, a nurse practitioner and family consultant in Oakland, California. "The answer is yes, you don't need to be concerned."

What to do

Don't panic. Not everyone does it, but masturbation is a completely normal thing to do. It doesn't cause any physical ills, pose any health risks, and no, it won't turn your child into a sex maniac, either. Masturbation in toddlers isn't sexual (as it is for adults) because toddlers don't know what sex is.. And while in older children explicit sex play is often a tip-off to sexual abuse or exposure to inappropriately explicit sexual material, this is extremely unlikely to be the case with toddlers, who don't have the imaginative skills for this kind of role adoption. (A toddler who's been sexually abused is more likely to become withdrawn or suddenly have trouble sleeping.) That said, toddlers masturbate because it feels good, and the good feelings can be as pleasurable for her as they are for adults. "A toddler may masturbate herself to orgasm," says Zweiback "complete with panting, red face, and a big sigh at the end. But it's absolutely not something to be worried about."

Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 17:02 (eighteen years ago) link

So, if the baby's doing it, does that make it OK for anyone else in the room to do it too?

James Ward (jamesmichaelward), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 17:07 (eighteen years ago) link

I suppose you have to ask around.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 17:41 (eighteen years ago) link

"A toddler may masturbate herself to orgasm," says Zweiback "complete with panting, red face, and a big sigh at the end.

TMI, Baby Doc!

Erick Dampier is better than Shaq (miloaukerman), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 18:37 (eighteen years ago) link

!

Super Cub (Debito), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 18:41 (eighteen years ago) link

what about a cigarette?

AaronK (AaronK), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 19:49 (eighteen years ago) link

I had a friend who told me he and his wife had sex with the baby in their bed. They were poor and lived in a one bedroom apartment. The baby slept with them every night. It was hard for me to imagine living that way, but it made sense. I think it would be interesting to talk to an adult whose parents weren't discreet about having sex. I wonder if an adult growing up in those circumstances would be better or worse off than someone like me, who grew up in a religious household where sex was never discussed as a positive thing.

recovering optimist (Royal Bed Bouncer), Tuesday, 6 December 2005 23:15 (eighteen years ago) link

one month passes...
2006 REVIIIIIIIIIIIVE

oh yeah, Sunday, 22 January 2006 01:35 (eighteen years ago) link

this thread is an ilx meme unto itself.

stockholm cindy (winter version) (Jody Beth Rosen), Sunday, 22 January 2006 01:37 (eighteen years ago) link

it was wrong in 2005, but I hear it's all the rage for 2006

kyle (akmonday), Sunday, 22 January 2006 01:46 (eighteen years ago) link

"I had a friend who told me he and his wife had sex with the baby in their bed."

I DEMAND GRAMMATICAL CLARIFICATION, TO MAKE THIS SENTENCE LESS...LIKE THIS SENTENCE.

John Justen (johnjusten), Sunday, 22 January 2006 01:59 (eighteen years ago) link

Talk about a testament to the importance of good grammar.

nabisco (nabisco), Sunday, 22 January 2006 02:09 (eighteen years ago) link

Good Gran'ma?

Battle Raver II (noodle vague), Sunday, 22 January 2006 02:29 (eighteen years ago) link

five months pass...
did everyone assume the original poster to be male?

spectra (spectra), Tuesday, 27 June 2006 23:55 (seventeen years ago) link

IP search seemed to indicate that it was male.

Andrew (enneff), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 00:05 (seventeen years ago) link

But, yeah, whoever said "just turn the baby around while you do it" was OTM. I essentially feel the same about this as I do about masturbating in front of a pet. It's easy enough to avoid, so why would you do it?

Andrew (enneff), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 00:06 (seventeen years ago) link

the question "why the fuck can't you just fucking move the baby out of view for the couple of minutes it'll take you to come" remains key

Thomas Tallis (Tommy), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 00:37 (seventeen years ago) link

did anyone ever start a "is it bad for a baby to see you menstruating?" parody thread? if not, can we just pretend and not actually bother?

gbx (skowly), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 02:21 (seventeen years ago) link

I'm sort of amused that James Blount never actually posted here, considering it's been the basis for his "Tuomas = Paedophile" rantings since.

Andrew Farrell (afarrell), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 06:13 (seventeen years ago) link

I essentially feel the same about this as I do about masturbating in front of a pet. It's easy enough to avoid, so why would you do it?

Pets can turn themselves back around = not a good comparison. Also, ts: a dog watching you have sex vs. a cat watching you have sex

Zora (Zora), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 08:54 (seventeen years ago) link

I wouldn't be surprised if there is a Frogs song about this.

Marmot 4-Tay: forth-coming, my child. forth-coming most righteous champion (mar, Wednesday, 28 June 2006 09:12 (seventeen years ago) link

WHY IS THIS THREAD STILL GOING

-- dabnis coleman's ghost (wt...), December 6th, 2005 4:11 AM. (dubplatestyle) (link)

:)

melton mowbray's APOCALYPTO! (adr), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 09:36 (seventeen years ago) link

Wow. (universal xpost to entire thread)

Fluffy Bear (Fluffy Bear Hearts Rainbows), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 14:34 (seventeen years ago) link

IP search seemed to indicate that it was male.

What, the IP nr was long and hard, instead of moist and soft?

Nathalie (stevie nixed), Wednesday, 28 June 2006 14:52 (seventeen years ago) link

Pets can turn themselves back around = not a good comparison.

I meant it's like pets in that it's easy enough to avoid doing it in front of them. (ie with a baby you can turn them around, with a pet you can put them in another room/outside)

Andrew (enneff), Thursday, 29 June 2006 02:15 (seventeen years ago) link

nine months pass...
CAN'T YOU DO THAT SOMEWHERE ELSE, PERV?

http://swardraws.com/fotog/archives/2005/03/baby-paul02.jpg

bobby bedelia, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 07:49 (seventeen years ago) link

classik thread

That one guy that quit, Wednesday, 18 April 2007 08:25 (seventeen years ago) link

two months pass...

Stab victim 'continued masturbating'
Christine Kellett
June 20, 2007 - 2:36PM

A Brisbane woman stabbed a male friend twice in the shower after he refused to stop masturbating in front of her children.

Defence lawyers for Kylie Louise Wilson, 28, said the mother of two "lost it" when her friend of six years, Daniel Peter Blair, went on a masturbation marathon on April 6 last year.

Brisbane's District Court this morning heard Mr Blair had showed up at Wilson's unit at Birkdale unit, in Redland Shire, where he took amphetamines before having a shower.

Whilst in the bathroom, Mr Blair, 32, began pleasuring himself, before moving to Wilson's bedroom, where he rolled around naked on her bed and continued his lewd conduct.

He returned to the bathroom for more and was busted by Wilson, who was attempting to bath her three-and-a-half year-old daughter.

The court heard Mr Blair refused her repeated requests to stop, prompting her to fetch a knife from the kitchen which she used to stab him twice in the left shoulder.

Crown prosecutors said Mr Blair paused only to put on his shorts and flee outside to wait for police to arrive, but was again overcome by the urge.

"Despite his injury, it seems (Mr Blair) continued to masturbate while in the garage," the prosecutor said.

Police took him to hospital where he received treatment for the minor stab wounds.

Wilson pleaded guilty to one count each of unlawful wounding and wilful damage.

Her defence barrister, Mark Johnson, said Wilson regarded Mr Blair as a "tolerably decent person" when he was not using drugs, but had become "extremely protective" of her daughter under the circumstances.

"He was in and out and round about, doing this sort of thing all over the house, " Mr Johnson said.

"She just lost it, to put it crudely."

Senior Judge Gilbert Trafford Walker accepted the Crown's submission that Wilson had been subjected to "grossly offensive conduct ... which in a moral sense amounts to extreme provocation."

He sentenced her to nine months' jail but ordered that she be immediately released on parole.

haitch, Wednesday, 20 June 2007 14:14 (sixteen years ago) link

"Despite his injury, it seems (Mr Blair) continued to masturbate while in the garage

roffle. Hope the kids didn't see stabbing either.

nathalie, Wednesday, 20 June 2007 14:16 (sixteen years ago) link

So wait, taking speed => wank frenzy?

Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 20 June 2007 14:18 (sixteen years ago) link

Like you didn't know already.

Mark C, Wednesday, 20 June 2007 14:20 (sixteen years ago) link

Does N3D R4GG3TT do speed?

Curt1s Stephens, Wednesday, 20 June 2007 14:21 (sixteen years ago) link

did Tuomas ever learn what A2M was?

Just got offed, Wednesday, 20 June 2007 14:23 (sixteen years ago) link

aching 2 masturbate

Curt1s Stephens, Wednesday, 20 June 2007 14:24 (sixteen years ago) link

its bad for anyone but your partner to see you masturbating.

titchyschneiderMk2, Wednesday, 20 June 2007 14:25 (sixteen years ago) link

ARGH THIS THREAD.

Trayce, Wednesday, 20 June 2007 14:28 (sixteen years ago) link

hahaha this thread

HI DERE, Wednesday, 20 June 2007 14:39 (sixteen years ago) link

Is it bad for a baby to see you masturbating?

Only if you don't share!

dean ge, Wednesday, 20 June 2007 14:45 (sixteen years ago) link

When I was a kid I did hear my parents have sex on several occasions, and once I walked into their bedroom while they were doing it, but I don't think it ruined my life in any way.

ironic disclaimer at the end of every tuomas post.

nathalie, Wednesday, 20 June 2007 14:47 (sixteen years ago) link

He was in and out and round about
He was in and out and round about
He was in and out and round about
He was in and out and round about
He was in and out and round about
He was in and out and round about
He was in and out and round about
He was in and out and round about
He was in and out and round about
He was in and out and round about
He was in and out and round about

gff, Wednesday, 20 June 2007 15:43 (sixteen years ago) link

I LOVE THIS THREAD.

John Justen, Wednesday, 20 June 2007 15:46 (sixteen years ago) link

went on a masturbation marathon on April 6 last year.

This would be somehow a little worthier of the "marathon" description:

"went on a masturbation marathon on April 6-9 last year."

StanM, Wednesday, 20 June 2007 15:53 (sixteen years ago) link

http://www.planetdan.net/pics/misc/baby-tunnel.gif

I DIED, Thursday, 28 June 2007 01:51 (sixteen years ago) link

looooooooool

Curt1s Stephens, Thursday, 28 June 2007 02:02 (sixteen years ago) link

I always thought of masturbation as more of a sprint than a marathon.

milo z, Thursday, 28 June 2007 02:21 (sixteen years ago) link

four months pass...

This thread is EPIC.

HI DERE, Monday, 12 November 2007 18:08 (sixteen years ago) link


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