January 26, 2004
Duff: She's no pop tart
Thousands of preteens -- sugared up and waving glow-sticks -- were attending their first Hilary Duff concert. And accompanying, in one of the greatest rituals of modern times, were parents, embarrassedly reminiscing about their own first concerts.
"I threw up on my sneakers for Ten Years After in Long Beach in '71,"said one father. "I drank so much Piels on the way to Black Sabbath/Slade at the Spectrum in '74, my buddy had to let me jump over the guard rail on the Schuylkill Expressway to take a wiz," yelled another.
It was easy to picture the kids of these parents in 20, 30, 40 years, taking their children to their first concerts, while embarrassedly reminiscing about this day. "I was so excited I wet myself," one might say. "I screamed so long I swallowed my chewing gum," another.
It could be an embarrassment party, but not too embarrassing, because -- after all -- nothing can top falling unconscious in a puddle of your own sick for AC/DC or carving "Slatannic Wehrmacht" in your forearm with a razor-knife while Slayer was onstage.
Sure, Duff's popularity -- her debut album has sold three million copies in the U.S. -- springs from her Disney work.
Sure, she's a cream puff who appeared to be faking ala Milli Vanilli through the entire show.
But she also seemed the perfect star for the pre-teen crowd, and why shouldn't they have their own pop stars? Do you want your little girl etching "Slatannic Wehrmacht" on her tit or piling into the tour bus after the show to be videotaped having sex with someone from Mudvayne?
Presenting herself as a straightforward power rocker in black tank top, skin-tight pants and white knee-high boots, she looked more like that bitch who fronted Hairy Clam in "Prey for Rock and Roll" than Britney, Christina or Justin.
Her songs were uniformly robust and catchy, with state-of-the-art hack playing and production.
Most noteworthy, while the now sixteen-year-old's image has been sexualized, it was still quite wholesome, not like the Humbert Humbert-bait, Spears.
A sense of even more wholesome girl power was reinforced by the fact that with the drummer -- in a sort of dominatrix outfit, three backup singers and an onstage video-deejay, all female, Duff and her gender-mates, outnumbered males in the act six to four!
It's a symbol for superior all-American goodness, one that should be fostered by parents who could insist that if junior is to be allowed to practice Misfits covers in the basement with his gender-mates, then at least a couple girls are to be included.
"There's a whole bunch of people who look like pop stars, and there's Duff who looks like a 16-year old who is a pop star. The audience thinks she looks like them, and they love that. They love the idea that her pathological warehouse-sized closet full of shoes could be their closet, if they had a couple million dollars," says Joe Levy, music editor of Rolling Stone.
― George Smith, Monday, 26 January 2004 20:59 (twenty years ago) link
― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 26 January 2004 21:06 (twenty years ago) link
― Huck Hurts (Horace Mann), Monday, 26 January 2004 21:07 (twenty years ago) link
― Blood and sparkles (bloodandsparkles), Monday, 26 January 2004 21:25 (twenty years ago) link
― nickalicious (nickalicious), Monday, 26 January 2004 21:40 (twenty years ago) link
― stevem (blueski), Monday, 26 January 2004 21:45 (twenty years ago) link
― Tim Finney (Tim Finney), Monday, 26 January 2004 22:42 (twenty years ago) link
― strongo hulkington (dubplatestyle), Monday, 26 January 2004 22:57 (twenty years ago) link
― Tim Finney (Tim Finney), Monday, 26 January 2004 23:27 (twenty years ago) link
― edward o (edwardo), Tuesday, 27 January 2004 09:40 (twenty years ago) link
― Fido Dido Wino (Francis Watlington), Tuesday, 27 January 2004 12:39 (twenty years ago) link
― Tim Finney (Tim Finney), Wednesday, 28 January 2004 00:13 (twenty years ago) link
― Sterling Clover (s_clover), Friday, 9 September 2005 20:34 (eighteen years ago) link
― lex pretend, Monday, 14 May 2007 12:44 (sixteen years ago) link
― m coleman, Monday, 14 May 2007 12:52 (sixteen years ago) link
― Alex in Baltimore, Monday, 14 May 2007 12:58 (sixteen years ago) link
― strongohulkington, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:11 (sixteen years ago) link
― Frogman Henry, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:11 (sixteen years ago) link
― strongohulkington, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:13 (sixteen years ago) link
― lex pretend, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:17 (sixteen years ago) link
― Dom Passantino, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:17 (sixteen years ago) link
― 696, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:18 (sixteen years ago) link
― strongohulkington, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:21 (sixteen years ago) link
― Alex in Baltimore, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:22 (sixteen years ago) link
― lex pretend, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:23 (sixteen years ago) link
― lex pretend, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:25 (sixteen years ago) link
― Alex in Baltimore, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:26 (sixteen years ago) link
― 696, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:26 (sixteen years ago) link
― strongohulkington, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:26 (sixteen years ago) link
― 696, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:27 (sixteen years ago) link
― lex pretend, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:29 (sixteen years ago) link
― Dom Passantino, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:29 (sixteen years ago) link
― Alex in Baltimore, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:30 (sixteen years ago) link
― Frogman Henry, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:33 (sixteen years ago) link
― strongohulkington, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:34 (sixteen years ago) link
― lex pretend, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:35 (sixteen years ago) link
― Dom Passantino, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:38 (sixteen years ago) link
― lex pretend, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:38 (sixteen years ago) link
― strongohulkington, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:38 (sixteen years ago) link
― Alex in Baltimore, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:39 (sixteen years ago) link
― strongohulkington, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:39 (sixteen years ago) link
― strongohulkington, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:40 (sixteen years ago) link
― Alex in Baltimore, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:41 (sixteen years ago) link
― Frogman Henry, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:41 (sixteen years ago) link
― Dom Passantino, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:41 (sixteen years ago) link
― lex pretend, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:41 (sixteen years ago) link
― lex pretend, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:42 (sixteen years ago) link
― 696, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:42 (sixteen years ago) link
― strongohulkington, Monday, 14 May 2007 13:43 (sixteen years ago) link
― and what, Wednesday, 16 May 2007 18:59 (sixteen years ago) link
― deej, Wednesday, 16 May 2007 19:02 (sixteen years ago) link
― r|t|c, Wednesday, 16 May 2007 19:02 (sixteen years ago) link
― Alex in Baltimore, Wednesday, 16 May 2007 19:06 (sixteen years ago) link
― r|t|c, Wednesday, 16 May 2007 19:09 (sixteen years ago) link
― and what, Wednesday, 16 May 2007 19:09 (sixteen years ago) link
― r|t|c, Wednesday, 16 May 2007 19:11 (sixteen years ago) link
― r|t|c, Wednesday, 16 May 2007 19:13 (sixteen years ago) link
― deej, Wednesday, 16 May 2007 19:15 (sixteen years ago) link
― lex pretend, Wednesday, 16 May 2007 19:15 (sixteen years ago) link
― r|t|c, Wednesday, 16 May 2007 19:19 (sixteen years ago) link
― r|t|c, Wednesday, 16 May 2007 19:33 (sixteen years ago) link
― deej, Wednesday, 16 May 2007 19:35 (sixteen years ago) link
― r|t|c, Wednesday, 16 May 2007 19:39 (sixteen years ago) link
― r|t|c, Wednesday, 16 May 2007 19:48 (sixteen years ago) link
― lex pretend, Wednesday, 16 May 2007 19:55 (sixteen years ago) link
― curmudgeon, Thursday, 17 May 2007 03:17 (sixteen years ago) link
― and what, Thursday, 17 May 2007 14:32 (sixteen years ago) link
― Dom Passantino, Thursday, 17 May 2007 14:32 (sixteen years ago) link
― deej, Thursday, 17 May 2007 14:34 (sixteen years ago) link
― Dom Passantino, Thursday, 17 May 2007 14:35 (sixteen years ago) link
― and what, Thursday, 17 May 2007 14:40 (sixteen years ago) link
― Dom Passantino, Thursday, 17 May 2007 14:45 (sixteen years ago) link
http://bp2.blogger.com/_2DoVgQdBtOw/RpIXkQ-RdwI/AAAAAAAAAZ0/Ass6-sl2yj4/s1600-h/Studio+33+Pres.+Best+of+2007+Massive+Megamix+Vol.3.jpg
― Dom Passantino, Friday, 28 December 2007 14:47 (sixteen years ago) link
This thread has my favorite Tim F responses.
― Alfred, Lord Sotosyn, Friday, 28 December 2007 14:51 (sixteen years ago) link
And I seem to recall a Cure for Bedbugs blog post about the new Arcade Fire album, which amounted to not much more than "Ick! Dull, dull, dull!" -- which I guess is partially an attempt to distance himself from his own 9.7 Pitchfork review of the first one.
-- jaymc, Tuesday, 15 May 2007 16:47 (7 months ago) Bookmark Link
Heart of truth at centre of thread.
― Dom Passantino, Friday, 28 December 2007 14:58 (sixteen years ago) link
Rosebud...
― dabug, Friday, 28 December 2007 15:41 (sixteen years ago) link
being all curmudgeonly . . . just makes you look old (ie irrelevant)-- lex pretend
-- lex pretend
Old = Irrelevant. LOL.
― Daniel, Esq., Friday, 28 December 2007 15:43 (sixteen years ago) link
welcome to lexworld, man.
― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Friday, 28 December 2007 16:48 (sixteen years ago) link
it's all part of his hilarious ideology and you should subscribe to his newsletter.
― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Friday, 28 December 2007 16:49 (sixteen years ago) link
Yeah. Like I said on another thread, he seems smart, just dogmatic. And since I'm old(-ish) (39), his comment struck me as funny and perhaps revealing about his enthusiasm for teenpop (my invisible psych degree sits framed on my wall next to my invisible music degree).
― Daniel, Esq., Friday, 28 December 2007 16:57 (sixteen years ago) link
and perhaps revealing about his enthusiasm for teenpop
and perhaps his own youth as well.
― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Friday, 28 December 2007 17:13 (sixteen years ago) link
Is he young? I assumed -- perhaps wrongly -- that he was an adult music writer/critic. I thought I saw a picture of him on these boards at one point (awkwardly holding a guitar, maybe?).
― Daniel, Esq., Friday, 28 December 2007 17:14 (sixteen years ago) link
He's a few years older than me iirc (I'm 21), but I meant "youth" in the broad sense.
― BIG HOOS aka the steendriver, Friday, 28 December 2007 17:23 (sixteen years ago) link
He doesn't seem that young when he's emulating the taste, writing style and enthusiasm level of someone half his age.
― Alex in Baltimore, Friday, 28 December 2007 17:25 (sixteen years ago) link
Yeah, they're good. This thread has my favorite Dom Passantino responses.
― Daniel, Esq., Saturday, 29 December 2007 03:22 (sixteen years ago) link
i feel that not everyone is treating this as seriously as they could -- lex pretend
epitaph
― gershy, Saturday, 29 December 2007 03:51 (sixteen years ago) link
Greta (Hilary Duff) is a trip, but she’s not a vacation. She’s seventeen, bright, beautiful and seriously rebellious, full of sarcastic wit that barely disguises the hurt inside. Pushed aside by her mother, Karen, who is on her third marriage and counting, Greta is shipped off to her grandparents for the summer, and she’s not happy about it. In fact, she tells them that she fully intends to kill herself before the summer is over and is currently compiling a notebook of suicide methods. Acerbic, yet winningly impulsive, Greta is a stunning force of nature, disrupting her grandparents’ staid and settled lives and the Jersey Shore community they live in as well. Greta falls for a harismatic, young short-order cook (Evan Ross), only to find out he’s been in and out of a juvenile correctional facility for stealing cars. Now he’s determined to do something with his life, but as their romance heats up, Greta has to overcome the concerns of her grandparents (Ellen Burstyn, Michael Murphy) about her boyfriend’s criminal past. But soon a near catastrophe gives Greta a wake-up call and demonstrates how deeply her own actions impact those around her. Greta’s growing love for her elderly grandparents, along with the excitement of her first summer romance, gradually strips away her defenses, revealing the promising, charismatic young woman underneath her shell.
― Dom Passantino, Saturday, 2 February 2008 21:31 (sixteen years ago) link
this was kinda the last hurrah for the poptimist crew in many ways, most of them don't post much anymore or at all.
― gershy, Saturday, 2 February 2008 21:54 (sixteen years ago) link
which might be why i have a million western swing songs when *logically* i could probably do with about 8
-- 696, Tuesday, 15 May 2007 14:27 (11 months ago) Bookmark Link
This is the wrongest thing on the thread, just because Bob Willis made a living as a Spade Cooley impressionist, doesn't mean Western Swing was a generic genre.
― Dom Passantino, Thursday, 24 April 2008 10:51 (sixteen years ago) link
Oh where, oh where did the nerd pedophiles go; oh where oh where can they be...
― Gorge, Thursday, 24 April 2008 16:45 (sixteen years ago) link
livejournal? no really, I think that's the serious answer.
― Alex in Baltimore, Thursday, 24 April 2008 16:47 (sixteen years ago) link
anyway kinda surprised to see Duff on the top 10 of FHM 100 Sexiest Women In The World 2008 considering that she's looked pretty awful with horse teeth veneers for at least a couple years now.
― Alex in Baltimore, Thursday, 24 April 2008 16:49 (sixteen years ago) link
BILL O'REILLY CALLS FOR CONFERENCE TO DISCUSS MILEY CYRUS LINGERIE PICS! EXTRA EXTRA!
http://www.thehollywoodgossip.com/images/gallery/miley-cyrus-boyfriend_448x261.jpg
(maybe all the nerds are at the conference.)
― scott seward, Thursday, 24 April 2008 19:00 (sixteen years ago) link
did people used to 'keystyle' on ilm?
-- deej, Thursday, 17 May 2007 15:34 (1 year ago) Bookmark Link
deej be all "Damn, I should have gotten here earlier"
― The stickman from the hilarious "xkcd" comics, Tuesday, 10 June 2008 15:09 (fifteen years ago) link
you've revived this thread four times
― and what, Tuesday, 10 June 2008 15:11 (fifteen years ago) link
I know, great innit?
― The stickman from the hilarious "xkcd" comics, Tuesday, 10 June 2008 15:15 (fifteen years ago) link
Nah. It's kind of sad. Let go, man.
― Pashmina, Tuesday, 10 June 2008 15:24 (fifteen years ago) link
soon to be an honorary edmonton oilerette !
― Daniel, Esq., Saturday, 20 February 2010 16:48 (fourteen years ago) link