zing

-- Nate Patrin (natepatrin550...) (webmail), September 26th, 2002 1:27 AM. (link)

hey how about instead you eat my ass you clueless cum bubble

-- simon trife ($$2...) (webmail), September 26th, 2002 1:31 AM. (simon_tr) (link)

* Once told a rabbi to get off the rag.

* Never really had a gun.

-- and what (an...), September 25th, 2006 7:07 PM. (ooo) (link)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Half of these are useless! more like "I Love Puns"
-- Andrzej B. (ww_sketche...), September 25th, 2006 7:09 PM

-- jaymc (jmcunnin...)

...

-- Lars and Jagger (nicole.kessle...)

-- Frank Kogan (edcasua...)

one for the sticker

-- Theorry Henry (miltonpinsk...)

-- Paul Edward Wagemann (PaulEdwardWageman...)

-- mr. brojangles (mikeoptin...) (webmail), Today 2:43 PM. (sanskrit) (later) (link) (admin) (userip)

to be fair, your stomach probably has scabies now.

-- jaxon (jaso...) (webmail), Today 2:46 PM. (jaxon) (later) (link) (admin) (userip)

?????

sounds like some strongo newvo cuisine

-- chaki (chaki.tim...)

HERE'S AN OPTION:

quit being such a fag

-- JW (jo...)

In Kobe:
http://static.flickr.com/27/46974643_ee7b25dcec.jpg

In Vancouver:
http://static.flickr.com/71/192710326_acd4ce0c78.jpg

Horse meat has about 40% less calories than even the leanest beef, while supplying 50% more protein and up to 30% more iron. No instances of mad cow in horse.

Canada and Mexico, our wacky neighbors to the north and south, eat lots of horse...

...as do Argentina, Austria, Belgium, Chile, China, France, Germany, Iceland, Kakakhstan (no shit!), Mongolia, The Netherlands, Romania, Slovenia, Spain, Sweden and Switzerland.

The consumption of horse is taboo in primarily English speaking countries.

-- polyphonic (polyphoni...) (webmail), Today 5:05 PM. (polyphonic) (later) (link)

The weird part was that he moved from San Francisco to Oakland to avoid getting mugged. TO OAKLAND.

-- polyphonic (polyphoni...) (webmail), Today 5:16 PM. (polyphonic) (later) (link)

-- Squirrel_Police (goblinatri...), September 28th, 2006.

you're still posting here only due to a loophole in banning

-- am0n (vvv...), September 28th, 2006.

----------------------------------------

aw, c'mon
-- boo berry

---------------------------------------

MR. PEMBERTON
-- boo berry

--------------------------------

mr perpetua
-- sleep

--------------------------------

Chubby, pink, and having bad taste? No thanks.
-- John Justen

-- service comedy (theundergroundhom...) (webmail), Today 5:05 PM. (JBR) (later) (link) (admin) (userip)

re 48: too bad kenan is already taken, lol

-- jaymc (jmcunnin...) (webmail), Today 5:09 PM. (jaymc) (later) (link) (admin) (userip)

-- j blount (jamesbloun...) (webmail), November 12th, 2005 2:59 AM. (papa la bas) (link)

-- kephm (dogtheprophe...)

uh, puerto rican girls or kate masonicboom wearing corduroy pants?

-- chakra khan chakra khan (mikeoptin...)

-- Shakey Mo Collier (audiobo...), October 2nd, 2006 1:30 PM. (Shakey Mo Collier) (later)

Too soon.

-- Thermo Thinwall (tupac.chopr...), October 2nd, 2006 1:32 PM. (Thermo Thinwall) (later)

It's always too soon for unfunny remarks.

-- cousin larry bundgee (bge...), October 2nd, 2006 1:34 PM. (bundgee)

But the movie never tries to deny that Stephan is insufferable. He's bloody creepy, and the love interest Stephanie tells him so (after he breaks into her apartment!), along with a lot of other good advice, like that he needs to develop a thicker skin. The movie indulges in the childishness of its subject, but it does not ever condone it.

I once knew people like Stephan. I don't anymore. I wonder if they're still out there making insane asses of themselves and completely failing to connect to other people.

-- always crashing in other people's cars (fluxion2...), September 27th, 2006 1:07 AM. (kenan)

http://www.hbc.fi/sture/hallitus/Hallitus-Tuomas.jpg

-- j blount (jamesbloun...), September 27th, 2006 1:19 AM. (papa la bas)

-- TOMBOT (tombo...) (webmail), October 3rd, 2006 10:45 AM. (TOMBOT) (later) (link)

tom that is the worst pickup line i've ever seen

-- mango selassie (teenagequie...) (webmail), October 3rd, 2006 10:48 AM. (teenagequiet) (later) (link)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

it's not all about you, y'know
-- a name means a lot just by itself (lfamula...), October 3rd, 2006 2:53 PM. (lfam) (later) (link)

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

they sure taught you good values in the boy scouts
-- like murderinging (mi...), October 3rd, 2006 3:10 PM. (modestmickey) (later) (link)

it may be against work policy, but you should try using google.

-- Steve Shasta (steveshast...) (webmail), Today 6:13 PM. (Steve Shasta) (later) (link) (admin) (userip)

-- milo z (wooderso...) (webmail), October 3rd, 2006 9:56 PM. (mlp) (later) (link) (admin) (userip)

gbx direct hit damn u ok morbs

fatality.wav

no joke, this is pretty good

https://newrepublic.com/article/151603/nihilist-nation-empty-core-trump-mystique

― reggie (qualmsley), Saturday, 27 October 2018 13:14 (three hours ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

are all your other posts jokes then or

― Mordy, Saturday, 27 October 2018 14:57 (one hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

tax returns!

long zing drought. where dey at

With your mom.

god be with the days

How far we've fallen since the '90s. You wouldn't see Justine Frischmann working at Burger King, would you?

― Le Baton Rose (Turrican), Tuesday, April 9, 2019 2:00 PM (one hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

since she was born into an extremely wealthy family and went to St Pauls then architectural school, no, you probably wouldn't

― Neil S, Tuesday, April 9, 2019 2:07 PM (one hour ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

amen.

I’m wary of that initial integration with my carefully tagged local library. Last time I tried it it was a sh1tshow

― calstars, Thursday, September 19, 2019 6:56 PM (four hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

google sh1tsh0w, find calstars

― now let's play big lunch take little lunch (sic), Thursday, September 19, 2019 8:11 PM (three hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

it's true that friends vanish when they have babies.

i occasionally say "Seeya in 18 years!" and they think it's a joke.

― a Mets fan who gave up on everything in the mid '80s (Dr Morbius), Wednesday, October 9, 2019 5:13 PM (one hour ago) bookmarkflaglink

this thread is making an excellent case for procreation

― na (NA), Wednesday, October 9, 2019 5:19 PM (one hour ago) bookmarkflaglink

triple-x knockout

Future biographers would have loved that shit but no dice

― treeship., Sunday, October 27, 2019 6:59 PM (yesterday) bookmarkflaglink

Future biographers? As in you in 10 years?

― sarahell, Sunday, October 27, 2019 7:11 PM (yesterday) bookmarkflaglink

<3<3<3

is it really a zing when you lob it right over the plate?

a home run is a home run

https://i.imgflip.com/28ro8k.gif

i mean that would be autobiography so

autofellatiography

Just kill me now

I just don't think "I signed up for a sex scene class and then the sex turned out to be really uncomfortable" is grounds for a lawsuit or the same thing as a producer raping an actress in a hotel room. It's gross and stupid but also really predictable.

― Οὖτις, Thursday, October 31, 2019 5:58 PM (one hour ago) bookmarkflaglink

Shakey I know you have a shtick but you're being dense

― president of deluded fruitcakes anonymous (silby), Thursday, October 31, 2019 6:06 PM (one hour ago) bookmarkflaglink

https://i.imgflip.com/3ewkfm.jpg

― The Mandymoorian (Whiney G. Weingarten), Thursday, October 31, 2019 6:14 PM (one hour ago) bookmarkflaglink

worth the effort

lol

solid effort tbh

crying at NA dunking on Morbs. the whiney thing is pretty amazing too.

sorry if this ruins it but that comment wasn't targeting morbs specifically, it really was a broad comment directed at 80% of the people posting in that thread that just happened to come after a morbs post

Flag post

from a Dungeons and Dragons thread:

Oh the flashbacks this all causes...

― Ned Raggett, Tuesday, October 12, 2010 8:14 PM (nine years ago) bookmarkflaglink

from last night?

― scott seward, Tuesday, October 12, 2010 8:15 PM (nine years ago) bookmarkflaglink

Nice wholesome zings.

nerd raggett

(whether it's an accurate take or not) it seemed extremely gauche for the guy who inserted himself into Biggie songs to then monetize Biggie's death. and then to do that while ripping off (there's sampling, and then there's ripping off) a very well-known hit, his seemingly only contribution being his limp, emotionless vocals...was a bridge to far for most.

― A True White Kid that can Jump (Granny Dainger), Monday, December 23, 2019 4:52 PM bookmarkflaglink

It’s kind of sad with you around

― Muswell Hillbilly Elegy (President Keyes), Monday, December 23, 2019 5:15 PM bookmarkflaglink

"And there is truth to scruton’s critique of modernism."

there is truth to your mom as well

― calzino, Thursday, February 6, 2020 6:45 PM

otm

This is out of context

https://i.ibb.co/VBQsxtp/1464251838-open-goal-MAIN.jpg
upload images

from the "let's write some lyrics in the style of CRASS thread":

(verse)
I can freeze an I cube and make a cup of tea
I can walk around the block and I can squash a flea
I can fall down on the stairs and break my f_ing knee
And everyone's a clueless c-nt except for f-ing ME!
(chorus)
Yes you are, yes you are
Cos you drive a f-ing car!
You are part of the machine
Choking us with gasoline!

― rattusnorvegicus (ratty!!), Friday, September 8, 2006 1:48 AM bookmarkflaglink

yeah, that sucked.
― GOD PUNCH TO HAWKWIND (yournullfame), Friday, September 8, 2006 2:05 AM bookmarkflaglink

sorry, September 8 2006 was a bad day for me

Always remember

You don't need to bother with Departed, really. It's pretty much a comically overblown genre exercise that bores more than it amuses.

― Frederik B, Sunday, January 22, 2017 9:18 AM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

much like Fred

― Supercreditor (Dr Morbius), Sunday, January 22, 2017 9:35 AM (yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

get em

zing apparently a dish best served three and a half years late when the zingee has left the board

Chef's kiss

Yep

xp - I'm the guy that appreciates a good zing when I see one, you must be the other guy.

https://www.metmuseum.org/art/collection/search/26884

Remember when Carter opened up Tutankhamen's tomb and discovered the earliest recorded zing

500 year old dril tweet

stet, your comparison made perfect sense. this is a moral panic.

― treeship., Monday, August 10, 2020 9:29 PM (six minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

Oh go and save an orphanage, Mr Goody Two Shoes.

― Young Boys of Bernie (Tom D.), Monday, August 10, 2020 9:31 PM (four minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

i noticed an obscure bug today.

1) click through to a youtube link
2) start watching the video in the in-app browser
3) put the video full-screen
4) rotate your phone so that it's horizontal

zing quits.

i bet most people's youtube opens in the youtube app tho. i think mine doesn't because i don't have a google account.

sounds like you're being .....
....
..

zinged

by zing

😎 YEAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Guinness is bad. It's like a version of a thing for people who think they like that thing but don't really know what that thing is because all they can ever find is that thing they think is the thing. Like Budweiser.

― Josh in Chicago, Friday, October 16, 2020 10:32 PM (yesterday) bookmarkflaglink

Oooh tell me more Professor Beer on second thought eat my room temperature ass

Bragging about being as beer snob in 2020 is so lame it's incredible

― Blues Guitar Solo Heatmap (Free Download) (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Saturday, October 17, 2020 8:33 AM bookmarkflaglink

stealing for dn - classic