TO MOLLIFY LINGJACKSON OVERDRIVEBERT WHO IS THE SQUEAKY DESERT FIEND, POST ON THIS THREAD AND ONE OF YOUR FRIENDLY ITR MODS WILL TELL YOU THAT YOU ARE WICKED AWESOME, AND POSSIBLY OFFER AN EFFUSIVE ST

man hating on keanu reeves is dumb, he has been in a higher % of totally fuckin awesome movies than most actors his age

poor fletch

Well, the trouble is that the movies would usually be better with someone else playing his part.

look it is a moon no it is something else no wait its a moon EAT SHIT COPPOLA

xpost max no ;_;

i dont know what to say to you weirdos, cmon guys, SPEED + POINT BREAK + THE MATRIX??????????????????? how can you hate a dude in all three of those

because he is in all three of them. also the matrix is silly.

Well, the trouble is that the movies would usually be better with someone else playing his part.

Exactly! Isn't the story that it was supposed to be Jet Li as Neo but they were stuck with Keanu? A VAST IMPROVEMENT IF THEY HAD GONE THE ORIGINAL ROUTE.

Max, just please don't tell me you thought Johnny Mnemonic ruled.

wow maybe i should just stop posting on this thread!!!!!

I have to confess that I have never seen POINT BREAK.

NED DO NOT MAKE TOMBOT LOCK OUR THREAD OF MIGHTINESS

Point taken, John.

I have to confess that I have never seen POINT BREAK.

You have not lived.

ned, i have to go with tom on this one

i feel like i am breaking rank

not really, i am just in threaddefense mode

No worries.

Back to other subjects:

look it is a moon no it is something else no wait its a moon EAT SHIT COPPOLA

Yes precisely. At this point I think I'll just stick with The Conversation. (Because it sure as hell ain't going to be Tucker.)

i do think point break is great, i just think it would have been better if keanu had worn a nixon mask throughout

FRANCIS FORD CRAPPOLA FILM FEST FUNNIES FEATURING:

GARDENINGS OF STONED
TUCKER: A MAN AND DA PLAN
BRAM STOKER'S TOM WAITS' SID VICIOUS'S DRACUUUUUL
JACK-FM

actually, that is a good general rule for keanu roles

i think his career went off the rails somewhere between cotton club and captain eo, but i cannot tell exactly where

hahahahahaha

i do think point break is great, i just think it would have been better if keanu had worn a nixon mask throughout

The crossover with The Ice Storm would have been great.

between cotton club and captain eo

...there lies OBSESSION

bram stokers dracula was totally sweet too, this thread is like crazy town

Come, my Maxy

I'm trying to imagine every day of pain on the set of Jack as Coppola and Robin Williams inflicted themselves on everyone else around them.

i bet they found themselves hilarious

Oh the outtake reels! (Oh the suicides.)

Max I think it part you have the proper distance for this stuff, seeing as it was filmed and released in the dark reaches of prehistory before you were born.

it is probably true that this thread is crazytown, be fair

jack totally sucked

I like crazytown, though, is the thing

We have agreement.

(Is there a thread poll for Robin Williams's crappy movies over the past two decades? Is there any reason why they keep getting made?)

I had forgotten until recently that Richard E. Grant was in Dracula, hot off the heels of Hudson Hawk.

I'm trying to see if there's a Rifftrax for POINT BREAK... and it turns out there is one for JURASSIC PARK.

Except that I have that dinosaur phobia problem.

has anybody seen

frankenstein: the true story

?

i am really interested, because of my isherwood fixation

jurassic park another CLASSSSSIX

Anyway, for all this folly, the bad film of the early nineties I remember above all else -- Kenneth Branagh's Mary Shelley's Frankenstein, which was produced by...COPPOLA! ARRRGH!

hahaha I think Hudson Hawk was the movie I saw on my ill-fated date with T0m Kl3ffman. (It's too bad Dan isn't lurking right now to laugh at me about that date)

I mean SERIOUSLY, that Frankenstein film. Mackro and I saw it in a theater down here shortly after it opened. BIG MISTAKE.

i hate all these coppolas

frankenstein unbound is pretty f'd up

My favorite bad logic bit:

DE NIRO: "MEET ME IN THE FIELD OF ICE!" *points to huge mountain range*

LATER THAT SAME SCENE, DIFFERENT DAY:

BRANAGH wanders around a big ass glacier and falls in a hole.

DE NIRO: "HI DERE."

i am filled with hate tonight

max, Jurassic Park scared the SHIT out of me when I saw it. It came out the first summer I was dating A. (who I later married). I got so freaked out during the velocoraptors in the kitchen with the kid scene that I BIT A.'s hand.

Then I didn't sleep well for a week.

So yeah... it was an effective movie for me. BUT I have a lifelong DINOSAUR FEAR.

xpost John, just relax and have a beer, okay?

Oh and every other scene that Frankenstein is someone screaming "NOOOOOOOO" to the heavens. Hell, even Lucas only saved that for once a film.

Yay Jurassic Park's UNIX system.

also smithwicks and miller high life

ha xxxpost

my parents made me read the whole book before i could see it in theaters

shaving cream can of ... wasted plot device

li'l max

Because they were concerned about your ignorance regarding Michael Crichton's stupid grasp of science?

"There there, Max, read Disclosure first before seeing it. You need to know what wicked temptresses all women are who aren't your mother."