SO U MOVING TO HSTNGS! PACK A AMPULE OF ANTIVENOM AND A FACK FULL OF EMINEM

TO RUINATION

it will be so AWESOME

and then so PAINFUL

I hope to keep your womenfolk company and then I guess pick you all up at the Emergency Department around 4 am

you guys, there's this screamo band out there called BLOOD ON THE DANCE FLOOR

they look like this:

http://images5.fanpop.com/image/photos/31200000/B0TDF-3-blood-on-the-dance-floor-31242326-327-400.jpg

unsurprisingly they are HILARIOUSLY HORRIBLE

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M2iDkf1SAWY

band members:

Dahvie Vanity
Jayy Von Monroe

"The band collaborated with several artists for the album, including Gods Paparazzi, KatiKaine, Rusty Lixx, James Egbert, Lady Nogrady, JJ Demon, and Nick Nasty."

i smell a poll

I am so glad to have discovered this band before AP's wedding

I feel like J3ff is going to be interested to know that his first name starts with A now.

Also moderately terrified about the dance at this point... John, where do you find these things?!

well his name here is Austerity Ponies so

Sara, have we introduced you to "Bring In The Katz" yet?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X0rrNcZp0CQ

Ok, I can't keep up with your ILX names, people. I have decided to address him as "Alan" from now on.

I have not heard this music yet... I should click on this link y/n

(I will do it later bc J is standing behind me and we must go to the Science Museum)

Y Y Y J will appreciate it! (Safe For Kids IIRC, no swearing or inappropriate subject matter)

J was being an utter PILL this morning which is why I had to go. FYI, boys are much easier than girls (so K and John, good work expecting a boy).

Also lol at the notion that I keep my kids from inappropriate subject matter or swearing... I am not great at that.

Classic J at age five:

We are in the kitchen. I am baking something.

J: Mom? Do you hate winter because it's fucking cold?

Me: (stifling laughter) Um, yes. But you shouldn't say that word.

J: What word? Fucking?

Me: Yes, that word.

J: Well, you say it all the time.

Me: Yeah, point taken.

Conversation with Alex (at age 14) last fall while _Anna Karenina_ trailer is on tv.

Me: Well, that looks ok but she throws herself under a train at the end.

A: How do you know?

Me: It's Tolstoy. Everyone knows the end of this story.

Me: (pause)

Me: ...but it looks like she had a some fun before that. At least she got laid and went to some good parties.

A: (sarcastically) Ladies and gentlemen, MY MOTHER!

hahahaha

My attitude is basically that these kids need something interesting to tell their therapists someday and I am here to provide that service.

I would whine more about my three hour delay flying home but my original flight time was 3:15; AP had a 7:30 flight and just now got on his plane. At least I can slip back into my Adult Swim + rye habit.

Also HOLY BALLS THE PAST WEEK WAS AWESOME

haha I was sooooo pathetic on Sunday morning.

I was in the bathroom and tossed my lip balm into what I thought was a basket that I keep toiletries in... came back in a few minutes later and it turned out I had tossed it into my glass of water.

In other words, plz move home.

hahaha

btw Sara, I need your input as a medical professional on an important topic: For Men, a Gluteus More Maximus

ok I can't even

Can we talk about how the daft punk "technologic" video is deeply deeply undettling?

Oh thanks a lot iphone, clearly I meant "undettling", that is totally an actual fucking word.

Haha yeah, I love that video

one of my opera friends posted this on Facebook and it's melting my brain:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aCynDckHtQU

WHY WHY WHY WHY ARE THEY INFLICTING THIS SONG ON OTHER LANGUAGES

the soloists are great, though

Okay can I blame the state or just Blaine?

http://minneapolis.craigslist.org/ank/cas/3972018599.html

This is all very hard, time consuming work for a committed father, and I am not exactly a people person, which makes it much harder, not to mention how hard it is to get laid when everyone I meet seems brain damaged and stupid, and worse still HAPPY AND PROUD to be so.

its always safe to blame blaine

that is also fucking magical fyi

everything about that makes me homesick and terrified

Oh btw are you all aware that "Oregon trail" was a mn product? Specifically some peeps from my first alma mater?

I haven't looked at this thread in 4 days and just wow.

I think I knew that about Oregon Trail???

My in laws visited for a week and then we went to Fringe festival for one day and basically I am apparently very old because I need to take a nap for a month.

I need a nap from our Ogunquit vacation.

I slept for over eight hours last night and I'm pretty sure I could have slept another eight... but I suppose "I needed to sleep more" is not going to fly as an excuse to miss my shift at work.

So apparently Baby jjjusten is here and the photo on FB is SO CUTE.

Also I have finished my present for him, so now I will have to figure out how to get it to you, John. Congrats (if you are home yet, ha) - and I want to hear details; it seems like he was born the same day that K was on FB reporting that your Post-It Eviction Notices weren't working?

hey guys, I just got a DVD of my cameo appearance on a Japanese comedy show

Why have you not put this online yet???

what in the

I haven't watched this yet to see how terribly I come across but I'm certain the limelight is stolen by the math/musical freakshow genius who got a middle-aged Japanese comedian to propose to him

I suppose ppl want the story behind how this happened, huh

DJP - the "J" stands for Japan

You have a lot of explaining to do, deX

I sang with http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Patrick_Harlan this guy in college. When he came back for his 20 year reunion, he brought a camera crew with him chronicling his younger days that included a segment where he gathered some college buds and we sang some songs. This segment also included us interacting with a comedienne who spent most of her time hitting on the math professor in the group, who is basically a cartoon in human form. Hilarity ensues, with me lurking in the background.

Who doesn't hit on math professors?

Wait, what?

I want to see this masterpiece.

http://thenypost.files.wordpress.com/2013/09/sandwich2.jpg?w=680&h=450&crop=1

never forget

I have no idea how to interpret that, but it might be that I worked the last two evenings and my head is full of crazy people.

look up "300 sandwiches"

hey, should I take improv classes?