SO U MOVING TO HSTNGS! PACK A AMPULE OF ANTIVENOM AND A FACK FULL OF EMINEM

A nurse practitioner friend of mine was telling me a horrific/hilarious story about a supervisor on his floor at a previous hospital job who was having a fit because the receptionist wasn't at her desk one morning at 9:00; when the receptionist did show up, she (a black woman) was wearing a head wrap because he hair wasn't done and the supervisor lit into her on the floor in front of everyone and ended with the line "... and who do you think you are with that hair wrap, Aunt Jemima?"

Obv this created an HR shitstorm that led to the supervisor delivering the following apology: "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to call you Aunt Jemima; you looked more like Mrs. Butterworth."

I mean, seriously

oh my god

basically

Mrs. Butterworth doesn't have a wrap.

my response was "Mrs Butterworth is darker than Aunt Jemima"

my response was the Lurch sigh

does anyone here know larry spooner?

omg that is the most amazing story I have ever heard

I don't think I shared the ridiculous practice NCLEX (nursing boards) question I ran across where basically the right answer was to advise a black woman not to shampoo her hair every day because her scalp might get dry.

(I have no idea where they were going with that question, seriously, but how culturally incompetent would that comment be coming from a white lady who knows zero about how African-American women take care of their hair?!)

ATTENTION

THE GUS GUS ALBUMS POLYESTERDAY AND THIS IS NORMAL ARE NOW AVAILABLE ON SPOTIFY

LISTEN TO THEM NOW

ATTENTION AGAIN

http://open.spotify.com/album/4INdjCh5oZ6KHeEpcYlfPC

COLD KRUSH CUTS IS ON SPOTIFY

also last weekend some friends were in town for their 15-year college reunion and I heard a painfully hilarious story from one woman about her time as a resident tutor when a kid in her entryway got so wasted at a finals club party that he shat himself, but instead of throwing away his pants he decided to dump them in a utility sink and set them on fire

ahaha. that beats the naked man in bathroom flushing soiled pants down toilet story.

the best part was that he was in a suite with a fireplace but decided that the fireplace would be a terrible place to set something on fire

the utility sink underneath the smoke detector, on the other hand...

I need to draw attention away from my soiled pants. I'll set them on fire!

welcome to the Ivy League

man, I love people. so many of them are crazy as hell

to be fair, in a purely utilitarian sense if i was the dude that lived there, i would rather someone threw their shat pants into my utility sink instead of my goddamn fireplace.

but would you then expect that person to set said pants on fire, is the real question

look i lived with AP for years

I think the combination of shit and fire might be a little much, even for you, Scurvy. I don't care who you lived with, even AP!

tbf when jjjusten was my roommate there was plenty of shit that should have been set on fire.

let's remember that we're talking about dorms and not apartments

with fire places and utility sinks?

welcome to the Ivy League

holy crap I thought this guy was at some ski resort or something

expensive rent isn't the only reason 98% of Harvard students live on campus; most of the dorm rooms are nicer than the apartments near Harvard Square (my freshman year room was a 2 bedroom suite with dark wood paneling, a fireplace, a window seat and a claw-foot tub in the bathroom)

ha i lived in 2 college housing spots with a fireplace, stupid carleton always trying to crawl up the skirt of the ivy league

to be clear by the end of the year both places basically no longer had fireplaces but instead the worlds grossest ashtray so

The only reason I didn't have a fireplace after freshman year is because I lived in a "newer" dorm (built in 1901) that didn't have any. I did have a duplex junior year and a walkup with a 475 square foot common room and 22-ft vaulted ceilings with skylights and access to the dorm's bell tower, though.

oh lol I can't read, the dorm was built in 1950

At gustavus, we just got a kick in the balls with a promise that it would make the next one easier.

if you were lucky, you got to keep the matress of the upperclassman you shived.

ah, college

so anyone know s4r4h p3in3?

that name looks familiar but it could just be because of "P31n3"

graduated in 94-5?

...maybe? I think that class outnumbered us almost 2-1 tho

(and if she was 95 there wouldn't have been any overlap with us in school)

Was she a great big fat person?

I have no idea who you are on about AND I think St. O dorms were worse than any of the rest of yours, even GAC.

Although that might just be irrational HSTNGS-related competitiveness, not sure.

my freshman dorm was a hovel, my sophomore dorm downright palatial

Really it was my string of wacko roommates that was more of a problem for me...

gbx, where were you? (or was this in Montana, when you lived on the Range while absorbing organic chem or whatever?)

I keep reading thru the _50 Shades of Grey_ thread. A. bought the book for me as a joke last week. It is *terrible*.

I hope someone on the thread notes that there is a whole scene where the male protagonist gets an ob/gyn to come see the female protagonist and then says, "I can't wait to get you naked."

Yes, because isn't every woman's dream to have sex right after a PELVIC EXAM?!

(this book has offered a lot of lolz, though, when combined with a couple of friends and some Scotch that tasted suspiciously like Magic Markers. Drink, read out loud, criticize, spontaneously act out some of the nonsense... hilarity will ensue!)

at a lesser ivy league institution

sophomore year two of my friends, by sheer chance, ended up with the #1 and #2 picks in the housing lottery (one was the actual, random first pick; the other one got the pick before that by winning some dumb contest?). this was an oft whispered-about housing lottery ~situation~, since it meant that #1 and #2 could each choose to live in one of two rooms that, together, were the whole top floor of one of the older dorms. the actual assigned rooms were pretty tiny, and triples, but they opened on to a shared common space that was legitimately huge (at LEAST 20x20). plus, miraculously, that 'common space' was actually private---you could only get to it through the dorm rooms, or by a door that only opened to those dorm rooms' keys. also there were two bathrooms.

we installed a full bar (friend #1 actually hammered brass over a huge piece of wood and stole a blood pump to serve drinks), got hell of couches, built a five gallon [REDACTED] called the death star, and were able to have enormous should-have-been-busted parties because if security came to check in (there were these little things they had to beep some device against on each floor), you'd see them slowly walking up the four flights of spiraling stairs and tell everyone inside to shut up. no trouble found us, except when a damage deposit got withheld because the lawnmower my friends were breaking down to use in a hovercraft leaked some oil on the carpet.

when i lived in montana, i lived in a house with a stoner and a retarded golden retriever named "boof", and the three of us had a wistful encounter with an indentured vacuum salesman

documented on this very message board

http://farm1.staticflickr.com/213/488866533_a8fb1c0d3a_o.jpg

http://farm1.staticflickr.com/211/488863262_e30e7e2d79_o.jpg

it was a simpler time

I followed the vacuum salesman event LIVE

Good times.