OK, is this the worst piece of music writing ever?

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From this week's R&R (Reviewed & Rated) section of Exeter University Guild Of Students' magnificent student paper, Exeposé...

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v236/njsouthall/Screengrabs/onsellingoutexepose.jpg

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:17 (ten years ago) Permalink

Argh, nu-ilx has shrunk it slightly past readable; here's a direct link - http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v236/njsouthall/Screengrabs/onsellingoutexepose.jpg

I just boggled at this over my lunch.

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:18 (ten years ago) Permalink

"Jonny" is a name for gaywads

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:20 (ten years ago) Permalink

This only proves again that editors and writers are two different professions. Hence the two names.

StanM, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:22 (ten years ago) Permalink

You are actually posting a scan of an article from a student newspaper as the basis for a thread, aren't you? Good lord.

Matt DC, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:25 (ten years ago) Permalink

It's a screengrab from the pdf off the website! They didn't have a normal text version...

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:28 (ten years ago) Permalink

can you link to the website? photobucket seems to be banned here.

acrobat, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:29 (ten years ago) Permalink

http://www.exepose.ex.ac.uk

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:30 (ten years ago) Permalink

goes from strength to strength -- feeder mention is possibly the high point.

That one guy that quit, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:31 (ten years ago) Permalink

System of a Down's top 20 single was six and a half years ago, fact fans.

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:32 (ten years ago) Permalink

"Recent developments in music have given Architechs a top 5 single"

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:33 (ten years ago) Permalink

surely this can't be THE jonny garrett?

http://www.myspace.com/chasingfaces

StanM, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:33 (ten years ago) Permalink

(yeah, they have a myspace already, the sellouts)

StanM, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:34 (ten years ago) Permalink

I suspect it must be, StanM.

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:34 (ten years ago) Permalink

I assume, from their name that they like Snow Patrol and The Small Faces.

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:35 (ten years ago) Permalink

um, holding up articles by students as examples of 'bad music writing'? talk about shooting fish in a barrel. Matt DC OTM.

blueski, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:35 (ten years ago) Permalink

Following in the footsteps of West Country acts like Muse and Thirteen Senses by already winning over interest from various major and independent record labels, things are definitely looking good for the boys. Having recently been asked to support New Zealand favourites The Checks who have just finished touring with the likes of JET and Oasis.

"I know someone who knows someone who knows the guy from Young Heart Attack quite well"

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:36 (ten years ago) Permalink

blueski and Matt DC offtm, this is the new web2.0 media era, we're all critics now, user provided content is the new professionally written content.

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:36 (ten years ago) Permalink

Even in the realm of student media this is BAAAAAAAAD though, Steve - I flick through Exepose every week and this is BY FAR the worst thing I've ever seen in it; hence not starting a thread every week.

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:37 (ten years ago) Permalink

Haha I used to write for that paper. I wonder how long before he Googles his own name and finds it.

Matt DC, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:39 (ten years ago) Permalink

It would be so wonderful if he googled this thread and responded. What an utterly thrilling discussion and exchange of views that could lead to.

blueski, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:40 (ten years ago) Permalink

Hey, with any luck he might hop over to ILE and start posting about his sex life or something.

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:41 (ten years ago) Permalink

(my question: is the article motivated by his own band possibly signing to a major soon?)

StanM, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:42 (ten years ago) Permalink

Maybe I should unleash the views of Chris Erasmus at you all?

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:42 (ten years ago) Permalink

Haha, yeah, I'd imagine so, StanM.

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:43 (ten years ago) Permalink

Hello Jonny's mom! No, he hasn't posted about his sex life yet. Try again later. Bye, ILX.

StanM, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:43 (ten years ago) Permalink

blueski and Matt DC offtm, this is the new web2.0 media era, we're all critics now, user provided content is the new professionally written content.

-- Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:36 (11 minutes ago) Link

Dom is entirely correct here. I mean, the chuckle factor is diminished by him being a student, but the democratization of criticism basically leaves us with this sort of landscape (coughcoughP.E.W.cough).

sanskrit, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:54 (ten years ago) Permalink

also why do nearly all student newspaper writers write in what feels like the same voice? there's certain syntax and word choices that only student newspapers ever seem to have.

acrobat, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:59 (ten years ago) Permalink

Nobody knows how to sub-edit when they're 21, that's why.

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:03 (ten years ago) Permalink

^^not unrelated to why writers in the say, New York Times tend to sound the same. for that matter, ever read Blender? Despite the bylines it seems to be written by one many-armed poprockbot.

m coleman, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:04 (ten years ago) Permalink

that really is quite incredible.

jed_, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:07 (ten years ago) Permalink

New York Times doesn't have sub-editors? That's crazy!

acrobat, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:08 (ten years ago) Permalink

Hey Jonny, your band fucking suck.

Noodle Vague, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:10 (ten years ago) Permalink

Jonny Garrett of Exeter University, that is.

Noodle Vague, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:11 (ten years ago) Permalink

I think you mean <a href="OK, is this the worst piece of music writing ever?;>Jonny Garrett</a> of Exeter University.

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:14 (ten years ago) Permalink

BOO HTML

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:14 (ten years ago) Permalink

Kudos on sticking it to Westlife, tho, Jonny Garrett of Exeter University. Those bastards have had it their own way for too long.

Noodle Vague, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:15 (ten years ago) Permalink

Does Westlife even exist anymore?

Tuomas, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:16 (ten years ago) Permalink

highlights:

"...bands like westlife who can, quite frankly, go screw themselves with a rusty spoon and get tetanus"

"had nirvana not signed to sub pop... we would probably never have heard one of the most influential artists of our time and dave grohl may have never founded the foo fighters."

the pathos!

jed_, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:17 (ten years ago) Permalink

but the democratization of criticism basically leaves us with this sort of landscape (coughcoughP.E.W.cough).

democratization of criticism = people slagging this shit off just because they can rather than for any constructive cause. it's just easy target practice, who gives a shit? no-one/nothing is ever going to stop under-grads inheriting these absurd ideas about 'how things should be' in the music industry. surely we've all read this same article many times in the past.

i'm just more relieved than ever my music writing from college days was too soon for blog-era internet heh.

blueski, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:19 (ten years ago) Permalink

"had nirvana not signed to sub pop... we would probably never have heard of..." Sub Pop.

NickB, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:21 (ten years ago) Permalink

Was there ever a thread for people to post their own abysmal juvenile music writings from uni days?

Michael Philip Philip Philip philip Annoyman, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:21 (ten years ago) Permalink

Not that I'd post on it, my capsule reviews of Kinesis singles were all fuckin bang-on.

Michael Philip Philip Philip philip Annoyman, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:21 (ten years ago) Permalink

perhaps one day i will post my 8/10 track by track review of 'Be Here Now' from the time.

blueski, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:24 (ten years ago) Permalink

Yeah, you real writers are all jealous that you've lost the ability to write like that, aren't you?

StanM, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:26 (ten years ago) Permalink

I wrote a two-part article in my uni paper called "Rhythm & Sound", which basically stated that all rock music that's based on melody or lyrics is boring crap, and that beats and sound are the essential components of good music - hence electronic dance music (and fusion jazz) is the best music there is. I got some angry comments from the indie kids.

Tuomas, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:27 (ten years ago) Permalink

Kudos on sticking it to Westlife, tho, Jonny Garrett of Exeter University.

and kudos to you lot for bravely and relentlessly going after such a signifivcant target as jonny garrett. sure showed him!

ts being one of many thick students w/ bad music taste who can't write, vs being someone who actually gives a shit about what said student writes in some minor student rag

or, matt'n'steve otm, u r all losers

lex pretend, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:27 (ten years ago) Permalink

but the democratization of criticism basically leaves us with this sort of landscape (coughcoughP.E.W.cough).

student newspapers have nothing to do with the "democratization of criticism"

Curt1s Stephens, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:28 (ten years ago) Permalink

I can't copy and paste from the Exeter Expose, but if you Google you can find a review where our Jonny talks about "Indy music".

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:28 (ten years ago) Permalink

also why do nearly all student newspaper writers write in what feels like the same voice? there's certain syntax and word choices that only student newspapers ever seem to have.

paul please, please tell me you don't actually care about the answer to this

lex pretend, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:29 (ten years ago) Permalink

"[BAND] - an alternative to pornography and terror!"

grawlix (unperson), Wednesday, 12 July 2017 16:50 (one month ago) Permalink

i found that article, it's all over the place, but it sounds like they saved music after the bataclan and restored manchester after the ariana grande tragedy.

https://www.theglobeandmail.com/arts/music/broken-social-scenes-kevin-drew-on-how-an-indie-rock-cornerstone-made-a-roaringcomeback/article35604550/

nomar, Wednesday, 12 July 2017 17:00 (one month ago) Permalink

Oh how my soul is now content.

Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 12 July 2017 17:37 (one month ago) Permalink

EliteDaily is still around

http://elitedaily.com/entertainment/celebrity/carly-rae-jepsen-new-album/2017596/

Frozen CD, Saturday, 15 July 2017 18:55 (one month ago) Permalink

I was alright until "Charli XCX's 'The Fault In Our Stars'".

Champiness, Sunday, 16 July 2017 00:26 (one month ago) Permalink

politely written but infuriating
https://thewalrus.ca/carly-rae-jepsen-hasnt-earned-your-scholarly-scrutiny/

austinb, Friday, 28 July 2017 18:39 (three weeks ago) Permalink

Jason Guriel is a writer based in Toronto. His work has appeared in Elle, The Atlantic, and Slate.

the works of jason guriel

j., Friday, 28 July 2017 18:55 (three weeks ago) Permalink

musta took a wrong turn at albuquerque

illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Friday, 28 July 2017 19:11 (three weeks ago) Permalink

lol what a dink

maura, Friday, 28 July 2017 20:28 (three weeks ago) Permalink

that Anthony Lane paragraph he quotes is awful. "it's fine to write about pop-culture as long as you are sneering and dismissive" - can't understand how anyone can think that this would lead to good writing?

soref, Friday, 28 July 2017 20:29 (three weeks ago) Permalink

there's probably something to be said about how everyone who derides carly rae jepsen assumes her to be much younger than she is. it reflects an arms length engagement *and* an unwillingness to dig in and think about why they're so bothered. have any of the anti crj broadsides discussed her, you know, music?

maura, Friday, 28 July 2017 20:30 (three weeks ago) Permalink

Anyone who admires Anthony Lane (as a writer or a thinker) can get fucked.

grawlix (unperson), Friday, 28 July 2017 20:39 (three weeks ago) Permalink

I liked him for about five months in 1998.

the Rain Man of nationalism. (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Friday, 28 July 2017 20:45 (three weeks ago) Permalink

like most people, he's gotten dumber and glibber with age

difficult listening hour, Friday, 28 July 2017 22:04 (three weeks ago) Permalink

None of this, I should point out, is meant to advance some silly value system pitting high art against pop culture; I’ll take the John Travolta vehicle Blow Out over Antonioni’s Blow Up any day.

haha this sets up exactly the dichotomy it says it won't, which is weird seeing as blow up might as well have been directed by austin powers. prob still otm tho

difficult listening hour, Friday, 28 July 2017 22:12 (three weeks ago) Permalink

Phillip J. Pierpont Kennicott VII looks down his lorgnette at the Kennedy Center Honors.

KenCen, apparently, is straight dissing ballet and opera to give awards to rock bands and even, gasp, rappers.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/entertainment/the-kennedy-center-honors-abandon-the-arts-for-pop-culture/2017/08/02/0287e65c-77a0-11e7-8f39-eeb7d3a2d304_story.html?hpid=hp_local-news_kennicott-1115am%3Ahomepage%2Fstory&utm_term=.e1e19c23539f

okapi paste (Ye Mad Puffin), Thursday, 3 August 2017 18:45 (two weeks ago) Permalink

tbf opera is horrible

Οὖτις, Thursday, 3 August 2017 18:48 (two weeks ago) Permalink

KenCen, apparently, is straight dissing ballet and opera to give awards to rock bands and even, gasp, rappers.

I read the tone pretty differently from this.

No purposes. Sounds. (Sund4r), Thursday, 3 August 2017 19:54 (two weeks ago) Permalink

Yeah. I mean, I disagree with the thesis but it's not unsound; I think he wants to sway things too far in the opposite direction. The Kennedy Center Honors should be open across the spectrum and I would hope for a diverse group of honorees from disciplines popular and esoteric.

That said, LL as the first rapper to get an honor is both fitting and kind of weird. I guess Chuck D's sweet spot was too short for him to be a serious candidate and Will Smith was way too bubblegum to have credibility.

this iphone speaks many languages (DJP), Thursday, 3 August 2017 20:24 (two weeks ago) Permalink

http://static.oprah.com/2016/02/ep516-own-watn-8-949x534.jpg

:(

mark s, Thursday, 3 August 2017 20:27 (two weeks ago) Permalink

(Thanks, DJP.)

No purposes. Sounds. (Sund4r), Thursday, 3 August 2017 20:41 (two weeks ago) Permalink

I guess I feel like the distinction that Kennicott (and many commenters) are drawing between traditional/classic art forms, on the one hand, and popular/commercial art forms, on the other, is not being given much scrutiny.

Also if, indeed, the pendulum has swung too far in the direction of LL Cool J / Eagles / Lionel, it may be worth remembering how long popular music was kept _out_ of consideration as Serious Art(TM). I am not the right person to unpack how much elitism or class/race/gender stuff has been involved, but surely that's at least worth mentioning as a factor in what gets taken seriously as art?

okapi paste (Ye Mad Puffin), Thursday, 3 August 2017 20:43 (two weeks ago) Permalink

I don't have a problem with any of them getting a Kennedy Center Honor! I do think it's reasonable to make an argument that Sam Shepard dying without one is a shame. It's also reasonable to make the argument that it is a little weird to give one to Gloria Estefan before giving one to Renee Fleming.

this iphone speaks many languages (DJP), Thursday, 3 August 2017 20:50 (two weeks ago) Permalink

That distinction is a couple of centuries old, with a plethora of literature scrutinizing it. Kennicott clearly has an opinion on it that is different from yours, and somewhat different from mine, but I don't think it's exceptionally extreme or poorly grounded, in terms of being a candidate for "worst piece of music writing ever".

(Also, going by Wikipedia, Fred Astaire and Richard Rodgers received KCHs in the first year they were awarded.)

xp

No purposes. Sounds. (Sund4r), Thursday, 3 August 2017 20:55 (two weeks ago) Permalink

KCH has always been a mix of high- and low-brow since its inception, which is the best thing about it. It should remain a mix. It's valid to be concerned if either side gains primary focus.

this iphone speaks many languages (DJP), Thursday, 3 August 2017 21:00 (two weeks ago) Permalink

Or sund4r OTM, if you prefer

this iphone speaks many languages (DJP), Thursday, 3 August 2017 21:01 (two weeks ago) Permalink

tbf opera is horrible

tbf lol @ u

she carries a torch. two torches, actually (Joan Crawford Loves Chachi), Thursday, 3 August 2017 21:21 (two weeks ago) Permalink

hey JLCL, I just listened to a 70yo sing the shit out of Glitter and Be Gay; want the youtube link?

this iphone speaks many languages (DJP), Thursday, 3 August 2017 21:40 (two weeks ago) Permalink

it's not the _worst_ piece of music writing ever, but i'm impressed that bill wyman has the clout and social skills to presumably get paid for this piece of sub-dave marsh hackwork. at least when marsh came up with a zinger, he was brief.

http://www.vulture.com/2017/08/all-165-pink-floyd-songs-ranked-from-worst-to-best.html

The Saga of Rodney Stooksbury (rushomancy), Friday, 4 August 2017 13:22 (two weeks ago) Permalink

oh I don't know -- there's some sharp writing

the Rain Man of nationalism. (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Friday, 4 August 2017 13:36 (two weeks ago) Permalink

it reminded me of the discussion we had earlier this week about negative criticism and its flaws.

The Saga of Rodney Stooksbury (rushomancy), Friday, 4 August 2017 13:45 (two weeks ago) Permalink

Do you like prog rock, the extravagantly conceptual and wildly technical post-psychedelic subgenre that ruled the world for about 30 seconds in the early 1970s before being torn to pieces by the starving street dogs of punk rock? Do you like the proggers, with their terrible pampered proficiency, their priestly robes, and their air—once they get behind their instruments—of an inverted, almost abscessed Englishness? I don’t.

https://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2017/09/the-whitest-music-ever/534174

Odysseus, Friday, 4 August 2017 21:46 (two weeks ago) Permalink

got a new d/n out of it at least

starving street dogs of punk rock (Odysseus), Friday, 4 August 2017 21:47 (two weeks ago) Permalink

he talks about their priestly robes like that's a drawback to OTT rock music

nomar, Friday, 4 August 2017 21:50 (two weeks ago) Permalink

'abcessed'?

weird echo of the falsies (Tom D.), Friday, 4 August 2017 21:52 (two weeks ago) Permalink

I take that to mean, "so full of Englishness that if you prick them with a needle, out would come Devonshire clotted cream."

okapi paste (Ye Mad Puffin), Friday, 4 August 2017 21:54 (two weeks ago) Permalink

inverted tho

ToddBonzalez (BradNelson), Friday, 4 August 2017 22:05 (two weeks ago) Permalink

If Weigel were David Foster Wallace, he would have written his entire book from inside that cruise ship, possibly never leaving his cabin, eavesdropping on snatches of music and chitchat and sending out his imagination in heavy spirals of paranoia and insight. But Weigel is a political reporter for The Washington Post, so he climbs off that wiggy, proggy boat and treads onto the dry land of chronology.

jesus christ

ToddBonzalez (BradNelson), Friday, 4 August 2017 22:10 (two weeks ago) Permalink

I take that to mean, "so full of Englishness that if you prick them with a needle, out would come Devonshire clotted cream."

― okapi paste (Ye Mad Puffin),

sounds tasty tbh

the Rain Man of nationalism. (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Friday, 4 August 2017 22:20 (two weeks ago) Permalink

Now you come to mention it, Jon Anderson was a milkman for a while.

weird echo of the falsies (Tom D.), Friday, 4 August 2017 22:24 (two weeks ago) Permalink

This article seems to be creating a stramash on fb, tom

starving street dogs of punk rock (Odysseus), Friday, 4 August 2017 23:53 (two weeks ago) Permalink

I think "pampered proficiency" deserves more attention. I haven't brought myself to read the whole article yet, though.

No purposes. Sounds. (Sund4r), Saturday, 5 August 2017 12:19 (one week ago) Permalink

Before reading or looking up anything about the author, I'm going to guess that the writer i) is white and ii) grew up wealthier than Geddy Lee.

No purposes. Sounds. (Sund4r), Saturday, 5 August 2017 12:29 (one week ago) Permalink

And has never worked as a milkman.

weird echo of the falsies (Tom D.), Saturday, 5 August 2017 12:35 (one week ago) Permalink

I just read it out of masochism and don't really know where to start.

No purposes. Sounds. (Sund4r), Saturday, 5 August 2017 12:53 (one week ago) Permalink

if weigel were david foster wallace, he would have killed himself by now. maybe james parker should try to be more like david foster wallace.

The Saga of Rodney Stooksbury (rushomancy), Saturday, 5 August 2017 12:53 (one week ago) Permalink

ok that's enough

Universal LULU Nation (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Saturday, 5 August 2017 13:05 (one week ago) Permalink

Haha so the prog thing's not even the worst thing he's written

Universal LULU Nation (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Sunday, 6 August 2017 13:59 (one week ago) Permalink

Parker's Rollins biog from the 90s was good. Not read/won't read these two pieces.

Senator Luther Strange (stevie), Wednesday, 9 August 2017 14:07 (one week ago) Permalink


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