OK, is this the worst piece of music writing ever?

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From this week's R&R (Reviewed & Rated) section of Exeter University Guild Of Students' magnificent student paper, Exeposé...

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:17 (7 years ago) Permalink

Argh, nu-ilx has shrunk it slightly past readable; here's a direct link - http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v236/njsouthall/Screengrabs/onsellingoutexepose.jpg

I just boggled at this over my lunch.

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:18 (7 years ago) Permalink

"Jonny" is a name for gaywads

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:20 (7 years ago) Permalink

This only proves again that editors and writers are two different professions. Hence the two names.

StanM, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:22 (7 years ago) Permalink

You are actually posting a scan of an article from a student newspaper as the basis for a thread, aren't you? Good lord.

Matt DC, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:25 (7 years ago) Permalink

It's a screengrab from the pdf off the website! They didn't have a normal text version...

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:28 (7 years ago) Permalink

can you link to the website? photobucket seems to be banned here.

acrobat, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:29 (7 years ago) Permalink

http://www.exepose.ex.ac.uk

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:30 (7 years ago) Permalink

goes from strength to strength -- feeder mention is possibly the high point.

That one guy that quit, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:31 (7 years ago) Permalink

System of a Down's top 20 single was six and a half years ago, fact fans.

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:32 (7 years ago) Permalink

"Recent developments in music have given Architechs a top 5 single"

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:33 (7 years ago) Permalink

surely this can't be THE jonny garrett?

http://www.myspace.com/chasingfaces

StanM, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:33 (7 years ago) Permalink

(yeah, they have a myspace already, the sellouts)

StanM, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:34 (7 years ago) Permalink

I suspect it must be, StanM.

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:34 (7 years ago) Permalink

I assume, from their name that they like Snow Patrol and The Small Faces.

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:35 (7 years ago) Permalink

um, holding up articles by students as examples of 'bad music writing'? talk about shooting fish in a barrel. Matt DC OTM.

blueski, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:35 (7 years ago) Permalink

Following in the footsteps of West Country acts like Muse and Thirteen Senses by already winning over interest from various major and independent record labels, things are definitely looking good for the boys. Having recently been asked to support New Zealand favourites The Checks who have just finished touring with the likes of JET and Oasis.

"I know someone who knows someone who knows the guy from Young Heart Attack quite well"

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:36 (7 years ago) Permalink

blueski and Matt DC offtm, this is the new web2.0 media era, we're all critics now, user provided content is the new professionally written content.

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:36 (7 years ago) Permalink

Even in the realm of student media this is BAAAAAAAAD though, Steve - I flick through Exepose every week and this is BY FAR the worst thing I've ever seen in it; hence not starting a thread every week.

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:37 (7 years ago) Permalink

Haha I used to write for that paper. I wonder how long before he Googles his own name and finds it.

Matt DC, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:39 (7 years ago) Permalink

It would be so wonderful if he googled this thread and responded. What an utterly thrilling discussion and exchange of views that could lead to.

blueski, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:40 (7 years ago) Permalink

Hey, with any luck he might hop over to ILE and start posting about his sex life or something.

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:41 (7 years ago) Permalink

(my question: is the article motivated by his own band possibly signing to a major soon?)

StanM, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:42 (7 years ago) Permalink

Maybe I should unleash the views of Chris Erasmus at you all?

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:42 (7 years ago) Permalink

Haha, yeah, I'd imagine so, StanM.

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:43 (7 years ago) Permalink

Hello Jonny's mom! No, he hasn't posted about his sex life yet. Try again later. Bye, ILX.

StanM, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:43 (7 years ago) Permalink

blueski and Matt DC offtm, this is the new web2.0 media era, we're all critics now, user provided content is the new professionally written content.

-- Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:36 (11 minutes ago) Link

Dom is entirely correct here. I mean, the chuckle factor is diminished by him being a student, but the democratization of criticism basically leaves us with this sort of landscape (coughcoughP.E.W.cough).

sanskrit, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:54 (7 years ago) Permalink

also why do nearly all student newspaper writers write in what feels like the same voice? there's certain syntax and word choices that only student newspapers ever seem to have.

acrobat, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:59 (7 years ago) Permalink

Nobody knows how to sub-edit when they're 21, that's why.

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:03 (7 years ago) Permalink

^^not unrelated to why writers in the say, New York Times tend to sound the same. for that matter, ever read Blender? Despite the bylines it seems to be written by one many-armed poprockbot.

m coleman, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:04 (7 years ago) Permalink

that really is quite incredible.

jed_, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:07 (7 years ago) Permalink

New York Times doesn't have sub-editors? That's crazy!

acrobat, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:08 (7 years ago) Permalink

Hey Jonny, your band fucking suck.

Noodle Vague, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:10 (7 years ago) Permalink

Jonny Garrett of Exeter University, that is.

Noodle Vague, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:11 (7 years ago) Permalink

I think you mean <a href="OK, is this the worst piece of music writing ever?;>Jonny Garrett</a> of Exeter University.

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:14 (7 years ago) Permalink

BOO HTML

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:14 (7 years ago) Permalink

Kudos on sticking it to Westlife, tho, Jonny Garrett of Exeter University. Those bastards have had it their own way for too long.

Noodle Vague, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:15 (7 years ago) Permalink

Does Westlife even exist anymore?

Tuomas, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:16 (7 years ago) Permalink

highlights:

"...bands like westlife who can, quite frankly, go screw themselves with a rusty spoon and get tetanus"

"had nirvana not signed to sub pop... we would probably never have heard one of the most influential artists of our time and dave grohl may have never founded the foo fighters."

the pathos!

jed_, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:17 (7 years ago) Permalink

but the democratization of criticism basically leaves us with this sort of landscape (coughcoughP.E.W.cough).

democratization of criticism = people slagging this shit off just because they can rather than for any constructive cause. it's just easy target practice, who gives a shit? no-one/nothing is ever going to stop under-grads inheriting these absurd ideas about 'how things should be' in the music industry. surely we've all read this same article many times in the past.

i'm just more relieved than ever my music writing from college days was too soon for blog-era internet heh.

blueski, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:19 (7 years ago) Permalink

"had nirvana not signed to sub pop... we would probably never have heard of..." Sub Pop.

NickB, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:21 (7 years ago) Permalink

Was there ever a thread for people to post their own abysmal juvenile music writings from uni days?

Michael Philip Philip Philip philip Annoyman, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:21 (7 years ago) Permalink

Not that I'd post on it, my capsule reviews of Kinesis singles were all fuckin bang-on.

Michael Philip Philip Philip philip Annoyman, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:21 (7 years ago) Permalink

perhaps one day i will post my 8/10 track by track review of 'Be Here Now' from the time.

blueski, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:24 (7 years ago) Permalink

Yeah, you real writers are all jealous that you've lost the ability to write like that, aren't you?

StanM, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:26 (7 years ago) Permalink

I wrote a two-part article in my uni paper called "Rhythm & Sound", which basically stated that all rock music that's based on melody or lyrics is boring crap, and that beats and sound are the essential components of good music - hence electronic dance music (and fusion jazz) is the best music there is. I got some angry comments from the indie kids.

Tuomas, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:27 (7 years ago) Permalink

Kudos on sticking it to Westlife, tho, Jonny Garrett of Exeter University.

and kudos to you lot for bravely and relentlessly going after such a signifivcant target as jonny garrett. sure showed him!

ts being one of many thick students w/ bad music taste who can't write, vs being someone who actually gives a shit about what said student writes in some minor student rag

or, matt'n'steve otm, u r all losers

lex pretend, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:27 (7 years ago) Permalink

but the democratization of criticism basically leaves us with this sort of landscape (coughcoughP.E.W.cough).

student newspapers have nothing to do with the "democratization of criticism"

Curt1s Stephens, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:28 (7 years ago) Permalink

I can't copy and paste from the Exeter Expose, but if you Google you can find a review where our Jonny talks about "Indy music".

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:28 (7 years ago) Permalink

also why do nearly all student newspaper writers write in what feels like the same voice? there's certain syntax and word choices that only student newspapers ever seem to have.

paul please, please tell me you don't actually care about the answer to this

lex pretend, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:29 (7 years ago) Permalink

http://www.artistempathy.com/blog/the-pomplamoose-problem-artists-cant-survive-as-saints-and-martyrs

haven't actually read it but it's a think piece on pomplamoose so ... shruggy emoticon

Mistah FAAB (sarahell), Friday, 5 December 2014 21:13 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

It's actually good. It's not about Pomplamoose really, it's about the way American society treats its artists.

Humorist (horse) (誤訳侮辱), Friday, 5 December 2014 21:19 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

yeah p good piece

Οὖτις, Friday, 5 December 2014 21:20 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

the forbes piece is like.......ever time i think we've reached a cellar for wites writing sanctimoniously about the triumphs (or lack of attention paid to) "real" music, we fall even lower

hanley ramirez ordering a pizza (slothroprhymes), Friday, 5 December 2014 21:23 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

also i had never heard of pomplamoose (i know rite total ILX party foul, i have been led to believe) and...um wut

not like "this prob sucks" necessarily, i haven't tried it, but the overall explanation of what they are....i think "um wut" will remain a fair reaction regardless of how they sound

hanley ramirez ordering a pizza (slothroprhymes), Friday, 5 December 2014 21:25 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

wait, were people really criticizing Pomplamoose for over-paying their band? Given all of their annoying traits, this seems like one of the least objectionable things they could do. Or am I missing some crucial detail?

Free Me's Electric Trumpet (Moodles), Friday, 5 December 2014 21:26 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

but for real though, why is that Hozier song so popular

example (crüt), Friday, 5 December 2014 21:26 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

It's actually good. It's not about Pomplamoose really, it's about the way American society treats its artists.

― Humorist (horse) (誤訳侮辱), Friday, December 5, 2014 4:19 PM (2 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Not a good example though. The situation with Pomplamoose just shows that nobody wants to sympathize with fucking Pomplamoose (especially when they're asking for it).

Evan, Friday, 5 December 2014 21:27 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

i feel like i pay attention to & enjoy a lot of pop music and i have no fucking clue who hozier was, and after reading this goddamned forbes piece idk if i have any desire to even try it for music-anthropology reasons

hanley ramirez ordering a pizza (slothroprhymes), Friday, 5 December 2014 21:32 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

Consumers and supporters of the “music wants to be free” ethos picked apart the numbers and decided that Pomplamoose spent too much money on lights and on pay for their back-up band.

No, it was touring musicians who questioned the lighting costs (and the relatively expensive motels every single night). And I don't recall a single word in any of the anti-Ploose pieces that implied they were paying their band too much; even the most vitriolic responses said something along the lines of, "(but at least they paid their band)."

Montgomery Burns' Jazz (Tarfumes The Escape Goat), Friday, 5 December 2014 21:40 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

no mention yet of the homophobic piece about the Peter Pan musical that Gawker ran?

EZ Snappin, Friday, 5 December 2014 21:48 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

i try to avoid gawker if possible w/ the exception of deadspin but it does not surprise me that they ran such a thing

hanley ramirez ordering a pizza (slothroprhymes), Friday, 5 December 2014 21:55 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

that said they also like to pay lip service to moral stances so they can assuage their consciences (the ones who have functioning consciences, so, not hammy noles) over their denton-enforced dive-bombs into content aggregation for the sake of DEM CLICKZ, so, its double annoying when they do shit like that

hanley ramirez ordering a pizza (slothroprhymes), Friday, 5 December 2014 22:03 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

there was definitely some question of "why did they HAVE 6 salaried people on their month long tour if it meant they toured at a loss?" before the Patreon info bubbled up, but that's not the same as asking why the salary was so high

da croupier, Friday, 5 December 2014 22:11 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

the big irony of that "artists can't be saints or martyrs" piece is that this all started because pompladude wrote a faux-confessional about how his band ain't rich because they chose to tour at a loss

da croupier, Friday, 5 December 2014 22:16 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

he sold HIMSELF as a martyr

da croupier, Friday, 5 December 2014 22:17 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

scott seward, Friday, 5 December 2014 23:17 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

That gawker piece is a abomination on like a million levels

http://morningafter.gawker.com/peter-pan-live-was-the-worst-three-hour-drag-show-weve-1667018164

a strawman stuffed with their collection of 12 cds (jjjusten), Saturday, 6 December 2014 03:14 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

Love the idea of some music nerd sharpening his critical knives to skewer those darn musical theater types that beat him up in high school. Make sure you cram as many references to embarrassing gayness in there as you can, you shitheel.

a strawman stuffed with their collection of 12 cds (jjjusten), Saturday, 6 December 2014 03:18 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

they also like to pay lip service to moral stances so they can assuage their consciences

I almost wish they wouldn't. When the two modes collide and you get sanctimonious gossip it's the worst.

Re-Make/Re-Model, Saturday, 6 December 2014 11:41 (2 weeks ago) Permalink

oh god i so did not miss this style of music writing. we have to go back

http://ratter.com/your-2015-coachella-friday-headliner-is-fucking-drake-1671889461

maura, Thursday, 18 December 2014 19:32 (3 days ago) Permalink

that's well suited to this thread; made me kinda ill to read

a stupid red mute juggalo (forksclovetofu), Thursday, 18 December 2014 19:33 (3 days ago) Permalink

unless you are a medieval Venetia or Cher Horowitz don't say ducats imo

tl;dr, gukbar, morbis detrius (wins), Thursday, 18 December 2014 19:35 (3 days ago) Permalink

yeah it's just gross on multiple levels

maura, Thursday, 18 December 2014 19:36 (3 days ago) Permalink

it's like a parody of what everyone thought gawker was when it launched

maura, Thursday, 18 December 2014 19:36 (3 days ago) Permalink

Bros have felt like music journalism doesn't "get" them, so this helps.

Evan, Thursday, 18 December 2014 19:42 (3 days ago) Permalink

Ms. Rac-Tan

tl;dr, gukbar, morbis detrius (wins), Thursday, 18 December 2014 19:44 (3 days ago) Permalink

Are you bigger than Drake? Get at me, zel✧✧✧@rat✧✧✧.c✧✧.

guess that bundt gettin eaten (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 18 December 2014 19:45 (3 days ago) Permalink

no mention yet of the homophobic piece about the Peter Pan musical that Gawker ran?

― EZ Snappin, Friday, December 5, 2014 4:48 PM (1 week ago) Bookmark

buncha straight men in this thread calling a gay man a homophobe.... welcome to 2014

J0rdan S., Thursday, 18 December 2014 19:52 (3 days ago) Permalink

I know nothing about the writer, but the piece read as classic bullshit musical theater = gay.

EZ Snappin, Thursday, 18 December 2014 20:09 (3 days ago) Permalink

just scanned through it and there is literally nothing homophobic about it. i can see how one might think so if one's basic understanding of gayness-as-identity is lowest common denominator musical-theater-ness, but that would be actually homophobic.

languagelessness (mattresslessness), Thursday, 18 December 2014 20:19 (3 days ago) Permalink

Pretty sure a bunch of us saw the article as homophobic. Which it is. Also it's written from a position of complete gleeful ignorance about the subject at hand, and badly written at that. Maybe he should add an "I'm gay, btw" to the article to clear everything up to the casual reader.

a strawman stuffed with their collection of 12 cds (jjjusten), Thursday, 18 December 2014 20:22 (3 days ago) Permalink

being funny with gleeful ignorance is a great position to write from, actually

J0rdan S., Thursday, 18 December 2014 20:45 (3 days ago) Permalink

Should I make a comment about social justice warriors scooping up the low hanging fruit or would that be misconstrued?

Vic Perry, Thursday, 18 December 2014 20:45 (3 days ago) Permalink

i can see how one might think so if one's basic understanding of gayness-as-identity is lowest common denominator musical-theater-ness, but that would be actually homophobic.

but anyway, mattresslessness has it

J0rdan S., Thursday, 18 December 2014 20:47 (3 days ago) Permalink

"being funny with gleeful ignorance is a great position to write from, actually"

So you were a big fan of the wife writes about her husbands record collection thing then

a strawman stuffed with their collection of 12 cds (jjjusten), Thursday, 18 December 2014 20:55 (3 days ago) Permalink

After I read the part about how beating on pots and pans was analogous to beating off, this immediately sprang to mind:

the farakhan of gg (DJP), Thursday, 18 December 2014 21:00 (3 days ago) Permalink

being funny with gleeful ignorance is a great position to write from, actually

― J0rdan S., Thursday, December 18, 2014 8:45 PM (16 minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

larry the cable guy fan here

da croupier, Thursday, 18 December 2014 21:04 (3 days ago) Permalink

Let's all construe the statement in the most simplistic way possible. That will make a strong statement against gleeful ignorance.

Vic Perry, Thursday, 18 December 2014 21:06 (3 days ago) Permalink

don't curse our darkness, complex it up for us

da croupier, Thursday, 18 December 2014 21:08 (3 days ago) Permalink

So:

perpetuating LCD tropes = not-homophobic

dismay at LCD tropes = homophobic

Gotcha.

EZ Snappin, Thursday, 18 December 2014 21:08 (3 days ago) Permalink

i haven't seen the peter pan musical and don't care to, but from what i can surmise, from clips and coverage, it's exactly the kind of gay minstrelsy hetero culture latches onto to share in the fabulousness (and then draw a line in the sand with "homophobic" when someone takes issue with its representation of gayness or boringness or w/e). get a clue morans

languagelessness (mattresslessness), Thursday, 18 December 2014 21:20 (3 days ago) Permalink

it's very gay ghetto. i don't think saying that's boring is homophobic.

languagelessness (mattresslessness), Thursday, 18 December 2014 21:24 (3 days ago) Permalink

get a clue morans

languagelessness (mattresslessness), Thursday, 18 December 2014 21:25 (3 days ago) Permalink

Rufus Wainwright is boring.

guess that bundt gettin eaten (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 18 December 2014 21:27 (3 days ago) Permalink

Young Thug is not boring.

guess that bundt gettin eaten (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Thursday, 18 December 2014 21:27 (3 days ago) Permalink

it's not homophobic in criticism to point out that something is cribbing from or has taken on the qualities of gayness/gay culture

J0rdan S., Thursday, 18 December 2014 21:31 (3 days ago) Permalink

ty

languagelessness (mattresslessness), Thursday, 18 December 2014 21:36 (3 days ago) Permalink

and sorry for use of the g-word.

languagelessness (mattresslessness), Thursday, 18 December 2014 21:37 (3 days ago) Permalink

The lineup has been shit the last couple years – COME AT ME.

anybody taken him up on this offer yet?

ƋППṍӮɨ∏ğڵșěᶉᶇдM℮ (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Thursday, 18 December 2014 21:57 (3 days ago) Permalink


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