OK, is this the worst piece of music writing ever?

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From this week's R&R (Reviewed & Rated) section of Exeter University Guild Of Students' magnificent student paper, Exeposé...

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:17 (nine years ago) Permalink

Argh, nu-ilx has shrunk it slightly past readable; here's a direct link - http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v236/njsouthall/Screengrabs/onsellingoutexepose.jpg

I just boggled at this over my lunch.

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:18 (nine years ago) Permalink

"Jonny" is a name for gaywads

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:20 (nine years ago) Permalink

This only proves again that editors and writers are two different professions. Hence the two names.

StanM, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:22 (nine years ago) Permalink

You are actually posting a scan of an article from a student newspaper as the basis for a thread, aren't you? Good lord.

Matt DC, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:25 (nine years ago) Permalink

It's a screengrab from the pdf off the website! They didn't have a normal text version...

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:28 (nine years ago) Permalink

can you link to the website? photobucket seems to be banned here.

acrobat, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:29 (nine years ago) Permalink

http://www.exepose.ex.ac.uk

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:30 (nine years ago) Permalink

goes from strength to strength -- feeder mention is possibly the high point.

That one guy that quit, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:31 (nine years ago) Permalink

System of a Down's top 20 single was six and a half years ago, fact fans.

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:32 (nine years ago) Permalink

"Recent developments in music have given Architechs a top 5 single"

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:33 (nine years ago) Permalink

surely this can't be THE jonny garrett?

http://www.myspace.com/chasingfaces

StanM, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:33 (nine years ago) Permalink

(yeah, they have a myspace already, the sellouts)

StanM, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:34 (nine years ago) Permalink

I suspect it must be, StanM.

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:34 (nine years ago) Permalink

I assume, from their name that they like Snow Patrol and The Small Faces.

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:35 (nine years ago) Permalink

um, holding up articles by students as examples of 'bad music writing'? talk about shooting fish in a barrel. Matt DC OTM.

blueski, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:35 (nine years ago) Permalink

Following in the footsteps of West Country acts like Muse and Thirteen Senses by already winning over interest from various major and independent record labels, things are definitely looking good for the boys. Having recently been asked to support New Zealand favourites The Checks who have just finished touring with the likes of JET and Oasis.

"I know someone who knows someone who knows the guy from Young Heart Attack quite well"

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:36 (nine years ago) Permalink

blueski and Matt DC offtm, this is the new web2.0 media era, we're all critics now, user provided content is the new professionally written content.

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:36 (nine years ago) Permalink

Even in the realm of student media this is BAAAAAAAAD though, Steve - I flick through Exepose every week and this is BY FAR the worst thing I've ever seen in it; hence not starting a thread every week.

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:37 (nine years ago) Permalink

Haha I used to write for that paper. I wonder how long before he Googles his own name and finds it.

Matt DC, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:39 (nine years ago) Permalink

It would be so wonderful if he googled this thread and responded. What an utterly thrilling discussion and exchange of views that could lead to.

blueski, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:40 (nine years ago) Permalink

Hey, with any luck he might hop over to ILE and start posting about his sex life or something.

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:41 (nine years ago) Permalink

(my question: is the article motivated by his own band possibly signing to a major soon?)

StanM, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:42 (nine years ago) Permalink

Maybe I should unleash the views of Chris Erasmus at you all?

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:42 (nine years ago) Permalink

Haha, yeah, I'd imagine so, StanM.

Scik Mouthy, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:43 (nine years ago) Permalink

Hello Jonny's mom! No, he hasn't posted about his sex life yet. Try again later. Bye, ILX.

StanM, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:43 (nine years ago) Permalink

blueski and Matt DC offtm, this is the new web2.0 media era, we're all critics now, user provided content is the new professionally written content.

-- Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:36 (11 minutes ago) Link

Dom is entirely correct here. I mean, the chuckle factor is diminished by him being a student, but the democratization of criticism basically leaves us with this sort of landscape (coughcoughP.E.W.cough).

sanskrit, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:54 (nine years ago) Permalink

also why do nearly all student newspaper writers write in what feels like the same voice? there's certain syntax and word choices that only student newspapers ever seem to have.

acrobat, Monday, 18 June 2007 12:59 (nine years ago) Permalink

Nobody knows how to sub-edit when they're 21, that's why.

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:03 (nine years ago) Permalink

^^not unrelated to why writers in the say, New York Times tend to sound the same. for that matter, ever read Blender? Despite the bylines it seems to be written by one many-armed poprockbot.

m coleman, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:04 (nine years ago) Permalink

that really is quite incredible.

jed_, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:07 (nine years ago) Permalink

New York Times doesn't have sub-editors? That's crazy!

acrobat, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:08 (nine years ago) Permalink

Hey Jonny, your band fucking suck.

Noodle Vague, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:10 (nine years ago) Permalink

Jonny Garrett of Exeter University, that is.

Noodle Vague, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:11 (nine years ago) Permalink

I think you mean <a href="OK, is this the worst piece of music writing ever?;>Jonny Garrett</a> of Exeter University.

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:14 (nine years ago) Permalink

BOO HTML

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:14 (nine years ago) Permalink

Kudos on sticking it to Westlife, tho, Jonny Garrett of Exeter University. Those bastards have had it their own way for too long.

Noodle Vague, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:15 (nine years ago) Permalink

Does Westlife even exist anymore?

Tuomas, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:16 (nine years ago) Permalink

highlights:

"...bands like westlife who can, quite frankly, go screw themselves with a rusty spoon and get tetanus"

"had nirvana not signed to sub pop... we would probably never have heard one of the most influential artists of our time and dave grohl may have never founded the foo fighters."

the pathos!

jed_, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:17 (nine years ago) Permalink

but the democratization of criticism basically leaves us with this sort of landscape (coughcoughP.E.W.cough).

democratization of criticism = people slagging this shit off just because they can rather than for any constructive cause. it's just easy target practice, who gives a shit? no-one/nothing is ever going to stop under-grads inheriting these absurd ideas about 'how things should be' in the music industry. surely we've all read this same article many times in the past.

i'm just more relieved than ever my music writing from college days was too soon for blog-era internet heh.

blueski, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:19 (nine years ago) Permalink

"had nirvana not signed to sub pop... we would probably never have heard of..." Sub Pop.

NickB, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:21 (nine years ago) Permalink

Was there ever a thread for people to post their own abysmal juvenile music writings from uni days?

Michael Philip Philip Philip philip Annoyman, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:21 (nine years ago) Permalink

Not that I'd post on it, my capsule reviews of Kinesis singles were all fuckin bang-on.

Michael Philip Philip Philip philip Annoyman, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:21 (nine years ago) Permalink

perhaps one day i will post my 8/10 track by track review of 'Be Here Now' from the time.

blueski, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:24 (nine years ago) Permalink

Yeah, you real writers are all jealous that you've lost the ability to write like that, aren't you?

StanM, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:26 (nine years ago) Permalink

I wrote a two-part article in my uni paper called "Rhythm & Sound", which basically stated that all rock music that's based on melody or lyrics is boring crap, and that beats and sound are the essential components of good music - hence electronic dance music (and fusion jazz) is the best music there is. I got some angry comments from the indie kids.

Tuomas, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:27 (nine years ago) Permalink

Kudos on sticking it to Westlife, tho, Jonny Garrett of Exeter University.

and kudos to you lot for bravely and relentlessly going after such a signifivcant target as jonny garrett. sure showed him!

ts being one of many thick students w/ bad music taste who can't write, vs being someone who actually gives a shit about what said student writes in some minor student rag

or, matt'n'steve otm, u r all losers

lex pretend, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:27 (nine years ago) Permalink

but the democratization of criticism basically leaves us with this sort of landscape (coughcoughP.E.W.cough).

student newspapers have nothing to do with the "democratization of criticism"

Curt1s Stephens, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:28 (nine years ago) Permalink

I can't copy and paste from the Exeter Expose, but if you Google you can find a review where our Jonny talks about "Indy music".

Dom Passantino, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:28 (nine years ago) Permalink

also why do nearly all student newspaper writers write in what feels like the same voice? there's certain syntax and word choices that only student newspapers ever seem to have.

paul please, please tell me you don't actually care about the answer to this

lex pretend, Monday, 18 June 2007 13:29 (nine years ago) Permalink

we should do a thread on those "setting the scene ledes"

Sitting at a table at the Beverly Hills Four Season, surrounded by an assortment of G-Unit associates, 50 Cent listlessly picks at a plate of nachos.

blonde redheads have more fun (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Wednesday, 26 October 2016 21:10 (one month ago) Permalink

meek mill looked through his glasses was my fav

Listen to my homeboy Fantano (D-40), Wednesday, 26 October 2016 21:11 (one month ago) Permalink

"I'm not sure you ever really leave the Midwest..."

Conor O'Berst is sitting at a Shakey's Pizza buffet in a post suburb of Omaha, the town where he grew up and turned into an indie-rock mecca. He is 36 years old.

blonde redheads have more fun (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Wednesday, 26 October 2016 21:11 (one month ago) Permalink

we should do a thread on those "setting the scene ledes"

― blonde redheads have more fun (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Wednesday, October 26, 2016 5:10 PM (sixteen minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

Me and D-40 and Jordan S. used to talk about this all the time. There was a classic Jordan tweet about it

https://twitter.com/jordansarge/status/429349381142093824

Whiney G. Weingarten, Wednesday, 26 October 2016 21:28 (one month ago) Permalink

i kind of like the apostrophe there in O'Berst, makes me think of the guy in a different way

tylerw, Wednesday, 26 October 2016 21:30 (one month ago) Permalink

also I know Ben Folds means well but if he only knows one musician who "has gone from being packaged to real" then he knows remarkably few musicians. (like, he for sure knows Tori Amos, right?)

hi ben. may i introduce you to the beatles? or stevie wonder? or michael jackson? or, oh, i don't know, your entire industry?

fact checking cuz, Wednesday, 26 October 2016 22:22 (one month ago) Permalink

strangely reported as though the readers not only didn't know the comedians but didn't know what comedy is

Britney Thinkpeace (m coleman), Monday, 31 October 2016 02:31 (one month ago) Permalink

I don't have a problem with the piece in general, but this bit from the NYT Magazine profile of Kesha was odd:

When the album was released, Kesha says, she was surprised that people criticized her for singing about the same things that her heroes, Bob Dylan and the Beastie Boys and Iggy Pop and Fugazi and Johnny Cash, had always been celebrated for.

Ah yes, who could forget all those celebrated Fugazi songs about drinking and partying?

JRN, Monday, 31 October 2016 03:48 (one month ago) Permalink

lesser known works in their catalog

mh 😏, Monday, 31 October 2016 14:10 (one month ago) Permalink

yeah whenever i want to pre-game i throw on some Bob Dylan cos he's always singing about partying

AdamVania (Adam Bruneau), Monday, 31 October 2016 14:13 (one month ago) Permalink

Rainy Day Women, BRAAAAAAAH

hardcore dilettante, Monday, 31 October 2016 23:24 (one month ago) Permalink

Street Legal

blonde redheads have more fun (upper mississippi sh@kedown), Tuesday, 1 November 2016 00:10 (one month ago) Permalink

from the 6 Best Things About a Tegan and Sara Show:

Their outfits are consistently on point and reflect the super-cool style they carry in their music. For the Love You to Death tour, the entire band has been rocking an all-white ensemble, plus a jacket of some sort for Tegan and Sara (usually a darker color or black). Can they get any cooler?

Show http://www.billboard.com/articles/columns/pop/7565716/tegan-and-sara-show-best-things

Frozen CD, Sunday, 6 November 2016 01:24 (one month ago) Permalink

Noisey declares itself a voice of resistance.

It's been disheartening to see some entertainment outlets already begin to normalize Donald Trump, as if he is any way a traditional candidate or a leader whose opinions merely diverge from the norm. We at Noisey have zero interest in doing this. In fact, the agenda we plan on pursuing over the next four years will be the polar opposite. We will relentlessly and unrepentantly rail against fascism and bigotry in all forms. Further, we will continue to celebrate the culturally diverse voices that make America's music scenes wholly vital, unique, and wonderful.

...

We're going to fight like fuck for music fans who feel like they don't have a voice in Donald Trump's America. We're going to fight like fuck to give a home to artists willing to speak out against oppression, misogyny, white supremacy, and xenophobia. We're going to fight like fuck to provide an outlet to artists and writers of color, to writers who are women, who are immigrants, who are Muslim, who are working class, and who are members of the LGBTQIA community. We're going to fight like fuck to use our platform here at Noisey to oppose everything Donald Trump and his administration represent.

Noisey is still owned by Vice, right?

Don Van Gorp, midwest regional VP, marketing (誤訳侮辱), Tuesday, 15 November 2016 17:07 (three weeks ago) Permalink

some rad people write for Noisey,some shitty ones too. the same applies to Vice
'twas ever thus

a serious and fascinating fartist (Simon H.), Tuesday, 15 November 2016 17:09 (three weeks ago) Permalink

I write for Noisey. Got a piece going up this week, I think. I just think it's funny that they're pretending/hoping nobody remembers who their parent company is and what that brand has stood for over the last, what, 20 years?

Don Van Gorp, midwest regional VP, marketing (誤訳侮辱), Tuesday, 15 November 2016 17:20 (three weeks ago) Permalink

psyched that the music blog isn't going to normalize donald trump

who is extremely unqualified to review this pop album (BradNelson), Tuesday, 15 November 2016 17:53 (three weeks ago) Permalink

in these times of domestic catastrophe and paralyzing anxiety, it is comforting to know that the world is ready to return to intra-media feuds

a self-reinforcing downward spiral of male-centric indie (katherine), Tuesday, 15 November 2016 18:16 (three weeks ago) Permalink

hi katherine

Whiney G. Weingarten, Tuesday, 15 November 2016 18:20 (three weeks ago) Permalink

imo their brand has changed a lot, but yeah xxp

mh 😏, Tuesday, 15 November 2016 18:53 (three weeks ago) Permalink

fight like fuck

Wimmels, Tuesday, 15 November 2016 19:10 (three weeks ago) Permalink

would you like some fighting fuck, beseeeerkerrrr

Whiney G. Weingarten, Tuesday, 15 November 2016 19:31 (three weeks ago) Permalink

lol

who is extremely unqualified to review this pop album (BradNelson), Tuesday, 15 November 2016 19:44 (three weeks ago) Permalink

lede:

It’s a fool’s game to try to make diagnoses as to what might or might not be wrong with celebrities who one has never actually met in real life. Or, worse, it’s actively counter-productive: it can lead to the excusing of behavior that’s inexcusable, or conversely, condemnation of behavior that should be considered in the context of mental illness.

headline, subhed and rest of story:

It Appears That All Is Not Well With Kanye West

Kanye looks like he could use some help.

there’s something going on with Kanye West, and it’s upsetting.

West did seem particularly emotional on Saturday night.

it’s hard to listen to this speech and not get the feeling that all is not well with Kanye West.

e’ve seen this movie before — a talented, unstable artist becoming more and more erratic, being egged on all the while by the press and the public, who love the vicarious consumption of “madness” without ever having to live its reality.

fact checking cuz, Monday, 21 November 2016 22:11 (two weeks ago) Permalink

above from flavorwire

fact checking cuz, Monday, 21 November 2016 22:11 (two weeks ago) Permalink

psyched that the music blog isn't going to normalize donald trump

― who is extremely unqualified to review this pop album (BradNelson), Tuesday, November 15, 2016 12:53 PM Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

maybe pfork can give him one of those rare 0.0s

the klosterman weekend (s.clover), Monday, 28 November 2016 19:01 (one week ago) Permalink

trumpistan

mookieproof, Monday, 28 November 2016 19:05 (one week ago) Permalink

Trump= Shit, Cat

duped and used by my worst Miss U (President Keyes), Tuesday, 29 November 2016 14:49 (one week ago) Permalink

more from the piece

We are going to start every week by re-reading this letter. We are going to remember our outrage at this moment and let it fuel our direction over the next four years. We are never going to let ourselves get complacent. We are never going to let the flames of resistance burn out.

after the fourth or fifth week of someone re-reading this letter to the staff people will start to feel pretty embarrassed about the whole thing. almost want to write a bot to tweet at noisey every monday "welcome to the workweek! have you reread your letter yet? reread it like fuck!"

the klosterman weekend (s.clover), Wednesday, 30 November 2016 04:16 (one week ago) Permalink

wow

niels, Wednesday, 30 November 2016 16:01 (one week ago) Permalink

Urie has been in the music industry for over a decade, the last remaining original member in a band who have consistently taken something inherently theatrical and turned it into something sincere, accessible, and fucking cool. He is one of the most versatile and enduring artists to emerge from a period in which people genuinely wore a tie and a t-shirt approximately two sizes too small. He delivers personal anecdotes like he's auditioning for a film about his own life, expressing joy in such overt ways that, if it wasn't a completely dehumanising concept, I would start a petition suggesting that everyone feeling weathered and weary of life should be prescribed fifteen minutes with him.

The burrito of ennui (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 30 November 2016 16:04 (one week ago) Permalink

what the hell let's do it anyway

the notes the loon doesn't play (ulysses), Wednesday, 30 November 2016 16:09 (one week ago) Permalink

I got tired just reading that

mh 😏, Wednesday, 30 November 2016 19:10 (one week ago) Permalink

I find myself often wondering where the good writing is on Vice that explains its profile.

boxedjoy, Wednesday, 30 November 2016 20:15 (one week ago) Permalink

so talk to me a LOT about this alcohol you're drinking... in fact let's just have that be half the interview

Flamenco Drop (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 30 November 2016 21:06 (one week ago) Permalink

"That was the same year that less critically-adored but more groundbreaking albums were released by System of a Down (Toxicity), Thursday (Full Collapse), Jimmy Eat World (Bleed American), and Tool (Lateralus), to name a few."

http://www.brooklynvegan.com/if-rock-is-the-new-jazz-then-i-blame-the-strokes/?trackback=tsmclip

scott seward, Wednesday, 30 November 2016 21:25 (one week ago) Permalink

groundbreaking claymation...

scott seward, Wednesday, 30 November 2016 21:26 (one week ago) Permalink

always surprised when a brooklyn vegan post isn't just tour dates

who is extremely unqualified to review this pop album (BradNelson), Wednesday, 30 November 2016 21:43 (one week ago) Permalink

I look at my parents and they just keep getting better with age, like really good wine. They get funnier, sometimes more aggressive but in a funny way… I think 30 is going to be fun.

so glad vice is fighting like fuck to give a voice to this in trump's america

the klosterman weekend (s.clover), Wednesday, 30 November 2016 23:06 (one week ago) Permalink

it's been a while since I saw jerry maguire but iirc basically he wakes up hungover after writing the mission statement and realises he'd rather continue being a cunt after all

diary of a mod how's life (wins), Wednesday, 30 November 2016 23:16 (one week ago) Permalink

Fight Like Fuck would make a great album title.

Working night & day, I tried to stay awake... (Turrican), Wednesday, 30 November 2016 23:20 (one week ago) Permalink

Slipknot - Fight Like Fuck

The Who - Fight Like Fuck

Tindersticks - Fight Like Fuck

Working night & day, I tried to stay awake... (Turrican), Wednesday, 30 November 2016 23:22 (one week ago) Permalink

We should really just start a separate thread so we can clown that essay for four years

Whiney G. Weingarten, Thursday, 1 December 2016 00:05 (one week ago) Permalink

make it so

Flamenco Drop (VegemiteGrrl), Thursday, 1 December 2016 05:11 (one week ago) Permalink

I think whiskey is one of those things that people really get into when they get older, like beer-
I'm also into beer.

Or coffee.
And coffee.

Well, you just love everything!

niels, Thursday, 1 December 2016 08:52 (one week ago) Permalink

95% of year-end list blurbs are awful

I've read Ta-nehisi Coates. (marcos), Wednesday, 7 December 2016 14:58 (four days ago) Permalink

"In this Post-Nov.8 world, 95% of year-end list blurbs are awful"

fixed

duped and used by my worst Miss U (President Keyes), Wednesday, 7 December 2016 15:09 (four days ago) Permalink


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