pitchfork is dumb (#34985859340293849494 in a series.)

They could just hype up a worthless band or two and use their "output" as filler quota material and then dump them a year later when there's actually news on bands people like to report.

Just sayin'.

"Do purple pontiffs leave paisley piles in the Minnesota woods?"

i miss jess being around

no sarge you do have a point, wtf is the point in putting up a bulletin about an "amazing" garden variety mixtape cover that has nothing to do w/ the artist's official output

i know they throw 10s at reissues all the time but putting them in "best new music" is a little nutty. been thinking for a long time they should just create a special reissues section apart from the new album reviews.

yeah it's not included in the BNM section though, it's just given the tag next to the review. which is a little confusing

btw starting threads about batshit pitchfork reviews is so 2002

ok pitchfork is dumb: none of your old links work anymore

lol @ JT Ramsay

Let's just admit it: "JT Ramsay" was a pseudonym Jaymc wrote under

If you don't believe me, note that JT RAMSAY is an easy anagram for "SMART JAY"

in the tradition of Pfork anagrams: I always thought Sam Ubl was a fake name because it's an anagram of "Albums."

Nice dude, tho.

JT too fwiw

Mullah Omar, though, that was real.

llama humor

whatever, Neat Hubbies

says a cheerer throwing pints like you

a hip screenwriter thong

:o

You forgot Cheetahs Rewriting Porn.

whatever happened to pitchfork mail? trying to remember the girl's name

Catherine Lewis?

could be her. all trace of the pitchfork mailbag has been wiped from the interwebss, so not sure for sure. this is all i know
tortoise=he loved him madly (miles)
STRONGO HULKINGTON RATES THE PITCHFORK SUPERHUNKS

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Albums

Sam Ubl

Pitchfork review in not getting it SHOCKAH

track reviews have been the source of some epic bs lately

http://pitchfork.com/reviews/tracks/11319-im-good/

Surrounded by such Euro-cheese, Pusha and Mal sound utterly lost-- blank, tired, and detached, and not at all compellingly so, as they were on "Emotionless". Over three verses, the sharpest shit either of them manage is "today was a good day, ice cubes on my chest" and "swimmin through the streets, lookin like I'm Shamu." After years of weathering bullshit and coming out stronger and more determined, it seems the Thornton Brothers are starting to sag inwardly, and at this point, who could blame them?

so pfork finally gets around to criticizing the clipse and then the review ends by saying "but who could blame them for making a shitty song!?"

http://pitchfork.com/reviews/tracks/11302-birthday-sex-remix-ft-r-kelly/

the pop revolution pitchfork of 04-05 never would've let "birthday sex" slip under the radar but finally getting around to reviewing the washed-up r. kelly version of the song and then saying that his autotuned nonsense is better than the original version is some serious lapdog bs

http://pitchfork.com/reviews/tracks/11317-olympus/

this guy is kinda the king of writing a bunch of words but not saying a damn thing

That Clipse thing is a shame, I usually like dude.

at first i thought it said "swag inwardly" and i was soooo puzzled

a little mini soulja boy living inside us all, turning his swag on

turn my swag inward

i liked the mingus reissue review: "I'm sure I'm not versed enough in jazz to assess what it is that makes Mingus Mingus": great, why are u reviewing album then loser

^^^ lol

haha i noticed that one too

"I've never really listened to music before, but"

There are plenty of times when I value good writing and insight over expertise. Certainly expertise is frequently a prerequisite for insight, but too much demand is placed on critics to be authoritative, IMO.

Great reviews can come from people who are relative outsiders to the topic and can bring a fresh perspective. Noone really needs more jazz reviews from rock fans who are out of their element, though.

The jawdropping part of that Mingus review is when he reveals that the bonus material on the CD is in PDF format. What the?

the worst part of that review is the lede.

chuckle a pitying chuckle, sing your own kind of song

i don't really read the track reviews cause i look at the list and it's just like:

7
6
5
6
7
7

maybe you should just tell me if a track is worth hearing or not--better than being like "pre-existing fans of this artist will want to listen to this track" which is very oh wow thanks a lot for letting me know.

true

my singles reviews have been like 3, 4, 8, 9

the 3 i actually gave a one but they said there has to be a basement

haha--i want to read now what did u give a 3 to?

http://pitchfork.com/reviews/tracks/11149-lark-on-my-go-kart/

No lie: The beat on Lark On My Go-Kart is the only reason the Asher album got a #1.5 instead of a #1 from me.

fucking loved that review xp

nice louis logic ref

asher roth is not the basement?

OK I'm taking a gander at their "Best New Singles" list and I think it's great that they have singles reviews again, and it's also great that they let you download/stream the song so you can hear it for yourself, but man these songs are all SO ABSOLUTELY FUCKING AWFUL!! This "Hang around baby baby we'll bake a cake for you" song is right up there with "Do the Helen Keller" on my worst songs of the year list, and they give it a nine out of ten!! I do like the Kobe Bryant rap song, though.

mr. snrub being a fan of the lil wayne kobe bryant rap is yet another twist in the mythology of this oddly dull character

that said i agree abt the vooodoo city song, if i may challops shit is totally bland indie-bait

asher roth is not the basement?

― swag serf (J0rdan S.), Wednesday, June 17, 2009 8:52 PM (44 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

just imagine

actually real talk i think its more bland than offensive so yeah a 3 was fair