Worst TV adverts of the moment

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There was another thread about crap TV ads before this I think, but that was about a year ago, and there are many many new crap ads on the telly now. So let us complain about them.
  1. Bizarre thing for one of those play kitchens for kids - entire advert has two young girls demonstrating what can be done with it, only that the soundtrack has two women dubbed on it saying stuff like "Oh yes, this microwave will really make her jealous!" and "Ha ha, this superb grill will really annoy her, she doesn't have anything like that at her home!". So parents should buy this toy for their kid because it'll one-up all of their kid's poorer friends?
  2. Despicable thing for Gillette. Two standard off the peg blokes watch cheesy Gillette advert in a living room (post-modern!). They complain about how rubbish said advert is, and at the end of it, one of them go, "It's good though, isn't it?" GNNNNNNNNNNNNN! Why don't they just get one of the ad men to come on and go "We think you're all fucking idiots, HAHAHAHAHA!"?
  3. Weird and annoying ad for baby doll with magnets in its limbs or something. I choose this for the incredibly irritating brat on the soundtrack going "bleep bleep" for NO REASON AT ALL.

Chris Lyons, Wednesday, 21 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

New answers right after this break...

Chris Lyons, Wednesday, 21 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

Anything using 9/11 and after to sell products via 'aren't we *wonderful* to help those who need it' approaches.

Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 21 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

I've thought of starting this thread myself since there are so many lame ads on but of course all examples have slipped my mind now. damn food.

Samantha, Wednesday, 21 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

Choices Direct, of course.

Robin Carmody, Wednesday, 21 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

I hate the ad where the kid is sitting on the toilet, and realises he's making a bit of a stink and goes "ah mum got that new press thing"...that releases a good smell.

I also dislkie the tooth paste ad that uses MOP's 'cold as ice' and then has the slogan "cool as ice'...I always think, why use that song then? I'm very fussy.

After a night's TV viewing, I shall garnish you with more examples.

james, Wednesday, 21 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

Where there's blame, there's a claim.

RickyT, Wednesday, 21 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

WICKEEEEED!! SOOOORRRRTEEEED!! BANGIIIIINNN!! BACK TO THE OLD SKOOOOOOOOL!! (cue Yazz.)

Alternately, that car ad where the teacher yaks on about how she will be there for the kids, doctors deliver babies ect... because Something Inside Is So Strong. So buy a fucking car.

Al, Wednesday, 21 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

All the Red Bull ads. Every single one.

Samantha, Wednesday, 21 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

the FedEx one where they poach the ambulance man to work for them is pretty tasteless. i presume it was made for the US originally, where they don't have the NHS which needs all the help it can get

michael, Wednesday, 21 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

I don't like the Orange one with Jason Euell - eventhough he is scoring and celebrating against Arsenal. I hope everybody who watched the Arsenal v Charlton match said the same thing when he scored, namely "I wonder if he's going to run out of the ground and go and find his mate?"

Jonnie, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

I really hate that one for Ocean Finance with the smug quiz-show host asking the contestants, "For ten points, tell me a reason why somebody might be.....refused....a loan?" I find it really irritating the way that the word "Advertisement" appears on the screen in the top left hand corner throughout...as if there would ever be a quiz show with questions about loans! Aaargh!

MarkH, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

The Head and Shoulders advert where the ad agency honestly think the shampoo buying public are going to be duped into believing they're talking about infidelity and shagging when really they're speaking about shampoo. I mean, since when has anyone been "seduced by the novelty" of an alternative hair product? Come on!

The whole Shampoo = sex thing is utterly cringeworthy. The only "urge" I get during the Herbal range ad is to dive for the off button on the TV remote.

[And I wish Jason Euell HAD ran out of the stadium on Wednesday - I would have settled for 4:3]

Trevor, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

The Halifax one where the woman does a doctored version of 'Livin' la vida loca' *shudders*

Will, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

The two blokes watching a Nivea ad in the Nivea ad! Who on earth came up with this? And who on earth paid them to come up with this? Also, there's first love and there's Muller love. The guy eats his yoghurt with a polaroid fer crissakes. Can you imagine the chemical- induced madness that must surely ensue?

Somebody on the best ads thread mentioned the Lupo ads, but the big flashing face that pops up every time you click on *anything* at nme.com is really, really, really, really, really, really, really annoying. Grrr!

Madchen, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

The one that gets my goateee is the man who has hung up about ten blue shirts on the clothesline, then reaches into the basket for another blue shirt an sais it's his favorite.Lol He's nuttier than me!!!! lol Gale

Gale Deslongchamps, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

Vodafone. The Dandy Warhols. That smug faced curmudgeon bloke who wandered about the desert before they took the next step into hellishness. The crusties. Their adverts when sponsoring POP IDOL with ha ha look it is HAMPSTERS making things BEEP (actually sounds okay) but this is NOT okay when it is advertising their cnutish BRAND NAME WEBSITE of vizzaavviitytytutwankwankwankwankOHPLEASE. They are DOT COMMUNISTS.

Also, Argos.

The Virgin Mobile advert with Nicole Appleton photocopying her knickers is also rather shit but then again they have ADAM AND JOE (!!!!) on another advert so perhaps I'll have to sign up with them. I hate Vodafone. Bastards bastards bastards. Adverts are SO GREAT though, I love adverts. They are often better than the telly.

Sarah, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

Hi Sarah! Adverts are better than the programmes that frame them because more time and money went on them!

Wil, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

Sponsorship idents: all shit. I only ever watch commercial TV on a saturday morning so that is all I can talk of BUT two stand out for me as Pete can testify:

1. Argos christmas ad using Slade and the cheapest, shittest, most fucking awful bogus product montage ever. Totally moronic, makes all the goods look like the heap of crap they are - when that fucking cut- out Santa comes by on his skis it might as well be Jive Bunny. There's a real trend lately for mass-market store ads to be this low- rent and vile, probably because the ad people all want to work on high-budget drinks brands and actually lavishing any skills on an ad aimed at the proles would be *so* uncool. Or of course it might be that the focus groups saw the ad and wuvved it, grr.

2. Harry Potter computer game - "FOOTAGE NOT IN GAME" i.e. the game itself has graphics that would shame an Oric. Not in itself a terrible ad but seen five times an hour it gets wearying.

Also! "I'd rather have a bowl of caramelflavouredcocopops" and the Olly the Octopus choosing his cereal are vile, the latter because it is untrue - every child knows which are the nice cereals in a variety pack and it's simply a matter of getting to them first, it's not a dilemma at all you eight-limbed sea bastard.

Tom, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

'You're every one to one you've ever had' DIE GOLDFRAPP DIE.

alext, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

I get so depressed when I watch ads on the smaller channels like ITV2 - they are invariably all for loans for sad, stupid people with no jobs and no money, somehow implying that rather than ending up with even less money and self-esteem, taking out a loan is the key to happiness! Celebs who do voice overs for these kind of ads (and I know the bloke who does that fucking blue telephone - how could he stoop so low?) are, IMHO, worse than those who advertise MacDonalds, Starbucks, any of the mega-corporate Incs that people seem to get so worked up about.

As for the Nivea "you know, I might buy some" ad, you can gain some kind of succour by imaging what he's going to be getting for Christmas from all his hilarious mates...

Mark C, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

oh the parade is offering me many bad ads. the lottery one with a parade of people singing the barenaked ladies' 'if i had a million dollars' is a v bad one.

BUT WAIT NOW THERE IS ONE FOR AMERICA WITH THAT ENRIQUE IGLESIAS HERO SONG. oh no wait it's for jeep! jeep LIBERTY, at that!

maura, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

They have a gospel choir in the Lottery ad. Morons should read the bible .

anthony, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

I have sky, there's no need to watch adverts.

chris, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

Like Samantha, I'm not very good at remembering the ads I hate. I will put a pen and pad by the TV and make a note.

Can I just say that I think the Argos ads are totally wicked.

Nick, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

That fuckin coke ad. I mentioned it before. The one where the guy is on the train and all his "mates" are asleep and he's drinking a can of coke, and he says "it was the best night of my life". "I was gonna miss these guys". And the way he says "these guys" like as if theres a coloured history, and they're some bunch of mad tossers who do crazy stuff but despite it all he was going to miss them. Oh the things they do! Falling asleep on trains, AND drinking coke.

Then at the end of the ad there's the final insult, that annoying high pitched "life tastes good coca cola" jingle. It reminds me of those films where one corporation runs the radio stations and keeps pumping out muzak to keep people happy. it's ok everyone, LIFE TASTES GOOD!!! and you're all allowed to try it!

Ronan, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

The Argos ads are pitched perfectly at target market = 'good' ads, even though I personally dislike them.

Will, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

Those Virgin ads for executive class flying or whatever it was were truly shit.

Jonnie, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

Oh yeah - I'm surprised no one has mentioned the horror of the Dorritos 'friends' adverts yet. Has that reached Ferrero Rocher/Alanis Morisette levels of flogged to deathness or something?

Nick, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

I make conscious efforts not to buy things if I think the ads are stupid. though I fail.

Ronan, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

The smug-faced wankism that is Archers. Stop fucking winking at me you bastard I hate you and will punch you, and oh hahaha isn't it so funny that the girl stays out later than him because she drinks Archers hahaha I bet her and the Lambrini girls love each other the stupid fucking wenches.

emil.y, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

Did you say urge? ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha

Alan Trewartha, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

george foreman's imac grillpan thing, WHAT THE FUCK IS ThAT!!!! "it's like a grill pan", okay, "it's ridged so you don't get as much fat in your food" riiiight "it's got a pretty coloured lid and it cooks both sides at once" okaaaaaaaaaay "george foreman say's it's really GRATE" WTF, GEORGE FOREMAN, cognitive dissonance, brain MEEEELLLLLTTTIIIINNNGG....

carsmilesteve, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

the RETURN OF THE GRILL-SHILL!!

mark s, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

1 Bacardi Breezer. It is undignified for a cat to be seen behaving like a cheap male nightclub smoothie.

2 The fabric conditioner one where the people are made out of - duh - fabric. It is disturbing to look at 'people' made out of fabric, and in fact they look horribly disfigured, like burns victims or people with hypothermia.

Ellie, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

i mean GRILL SHILLAZ !!!

mark s, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

I can't stand those crappy Dani Behr McDonalds Premiere advert. They make me want to hurt Dani Behr more than usual.

(I really like those Argos adverts - they cool)

jamesmichaelward, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

There is this one ad wherein a teenager pretends to be Fred Durst from Limp Bizkit. Urgh....

helen fordsdale, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

There is this one ad wherein a teenager pretends to be Fred Durst from Limp Bizkit. Urgh....

Blimey, isn't it usually the other way round?

jamesmichaelward, Thursday, 22 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

LAMBRINI GIRLS ARGH.

Tom, Friday, 23 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

(though they oppress me from posters not the telly)

Tom, Friday, 23 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

Another hated poster ad - what do these people have in common they all drink portugese wine (or something, I do not know what horrible drink they all drink all I know is that it's yet another poster with Tony Parsons gazing at me, best selling author yes)

Tom, Friday, 23 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

That German wine ad is shit as well. The one with that ex-goth lass who now is a city worker of some description and has noticed the wine changing with her. I am also dismayed by by the cheesiness of that Hardys ad with the bottle making an impression on the car, hur-hur- hur. Are all wine adverts rubbish by law or something? I can't think of a single good one off the top of my head.

RickyT, Friday, 23 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

Ah now whot about the S. African wines one dominating the Northern/Victoria lines? With the funny reptile lying back in a tshirt with the S.African flag on it? Ha ha that is funny ha ha ha fetch me a bottle! As long as I can smash it OVER MY OWN HEAD argh. Tube adverts surely don't count. I still want to know why they are all so crap for car insurance (if yer on the tube = good chance you don't drive and not target demographic SURELY) and LET YER BODY KNOW WHEN TO CONCIEVE helff fads. Sheesh.

Sarah, Friday, 23 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

I have never seen a wine ad except 'le francais adore Le Piat D'or' which I doubt even counts as wine. Is wine advertising targeted at the metropolis, or have I missed my demographic?

Ellie, Friday, 23 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

"In France it's part of the language" => very very very angry RickyT shouting at television.

RickyT, Friday, 23 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

Spitfire Ale is even worse though.

Wine ads infest the London Underground system. That and ads for ten- week 'philosophy' courses.

Tom, Friday, 23 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

'I AM DRUG FREE' screams trophy winning golfer.

Will, Friday, 23 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

Are any of the common ads on the tube any good? Travel insurance = shit, cheap phone calls = shit, wellwoman pills = very smug detoxified woman therefore shit, cartoon strip style loan ads = even shitter, car insurance ads = dreadful with particular brickbats going to Diamond (car insurance for girls NOT men) and Admiral (Tim and whatserface 'soap opera' type affair only the fuckers can't even be bothered to use the same models from episode to episode) and as pointed out above why do I want car insurance when I'm on the sodding TRAIN anyway?

Must. Calm. Down.

RickyT, Friday, 23 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

'Scientology helped me become a successful photographer', yes yes but it also made you look like Greg Evigan.

RickyT, Friday, 23 November 2001 01:00 (seventeen years ago) link

that sandcastle bloke is going to give me nightmares.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pBsNErt1OmQ

also, maxine peake, how exactly does a smart meter save me energy?

koogs, Monday, 31 December 2018 13:00 (six months ago) link

oh man the smart meter propaganda machine, so transparent

Driving Drone for Christmas (Noodle Vague), Monday, 31 December 2018 13:10 (six months ago) link

first time i saw that sand man i got M.R. James vibes

Driving Drone for Christmas (Noodle Vague), Monday, 31 December 2018 13:11 (six months ago) link

If I really want to save energy, Maxine, the best option would be to keep my old dumb meter and link the fucker out with some 4mm twin and then viola! free energy.

calzino, Monday, 31 December 2018 13:34 (six months ago) link

one of those smart meter adverts had The Jellies' "Jive Baby On A Saturday Night" on it!

Acting Crazy (Instrumental) (jed_), Friday, 11 January 2019 00:09 (six months ago) link

I've gone hardcore militant against smart meters since this doorstepping prick informed me I'd be forced to pay for the install if I didn't opt for it now. I told him my meter was linked out, there was a mini cannabis factory under the stairs and fuck off and die cunt!

calzino, Friday, 11 January 2019 00:29 (six months ago) link

smart meter propaganda seems to be based on two contradictory premises:

1. when using a conventional meter you are being charged in a way that is inaccurate, tending towards overcharging.

2. we, a company looking to make money from you, wants to spend money installing a meter that will charge you less out of a sense of fairness

( ͡☉ ͜ʖ ͡☉) (jim in vancouver), Friday, 11 January 2019 00:31 (six months ago) link

It's because now, the supply of energy is a competitive market. So, they would prefer you give *them* a reduced amount of money rather than log in to some other supplier.

Mark G, Friday, 11 January 2019 11:16 (six months ago) link

> when using a conventional meter you are being charged in a way that is inaccurate

this is only because they read the meters once a year now, the legal minimum, rather than every 3 months like they used to.

they've just sent me a leaflet saying that they are changing my tarrif and i will be 34p better off every year. don't spend it all at once.

more worryingly, they have increased the standing charge and decreased the per-unit charge, which makes it harder for me to save money by decreasing usage, rendering the smart meter thing more ridiculous.

koogs, Friday, 11 January 2019 12:16 (six months ago) link

anyway, tv adverts...

koogs, Friday, 11 January 2019 12:17 (six months ago) link

Pretty fucked up the level of torture I daydream of inflicting on Greg from the Halifax.

Berks & Cow (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 12 January 2019 09:14 (six months ago) link

It's because now, the supply of energy is a competitive market. So, they would prefer you give *them* a reduced amount of money rather than log in to some other supplier.

― Mark G, Friday, January 11, 2019 3:16 AM (yesterday)Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

The same thing happens where I am despite there not being competition

( ͡☉ ͜ʖ ͡☉) (jim in vancouver), Saturday, 12 January 2019 09:45 (six months ago) link

Samuel Adams commercial that's been running on youtube.

Fisherwoman hauling up her catch or something:
"It's got huge flay-vah...once it hits ya lips, ya know? Hah hah hah!"

I can't find it anywhere online except randomly ahead of youtube videos.

peace, man, Thursday, 24 January 2019 12:37 (five months ago) link

use ublock origin and you will soon forget that youtube even has ads

Dan I., Tuesday, 29 January 2019 22:27 (five months ago) link

it's terrible in its own way but putting durex lube adverts in the middle of that Fantastic Beasts film on itv2 the other day probably caused a lot of awkward questions to be asked.

koogs, Friday, 1 February 2019 11:06 (five months ago) link

use ublock origin and you will soon forget that youtube even has ads

this doesn’t work if you’re sending youtubes to your TV from your phone

sans lep (sic), Friday, 1 February 2019 11:46 (five months ago) link

or just watching them on yr phone, I guess

sans lep (sic), Friday, 1 February 2019 11:47 (five months ago) link

lubeblock

Mark G, Friday, 1 February 2019 12:05 (five months ago) link

two weeks pass...

"No time to read? Yeah right you thick bastard"

CDU next Tuesday (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 17 February 2019 10:11 (five months ago) link

renault kadjar virtual ambassador

conrad, Sunday, 17 February 2019 10:42 (five months ago) link

fucking British Airways

Colonel Poo, Sunday, 17 February 2019 12:31 (five months ago) link

three weeks pass...

In no particular order:

That Australian lizard on the weflip adverts.

The small girl channeling Tina Turner.

I didn't know oral b even MADE a toothpaste.

Anything containing the term "equity release"

koogs, Saturday, 16 March 2019 19:01 (four months ago) link

OTM to the first 4. I instantaneously tune out of adverts when I hear terms like "equity release".

Bielsa, Bub (Tom D.), Saturday, 16 March 2019 19:05 (four months ago) link

I didn't know oral b even MADE a toothpaste

It's more her giant spit/lisp which turns it into pToothpTaspTe.

Elitist cheese photos (aldo), Saturday, 16 March 2019 19:08 (four months ago) link

"peely peely!"

koogs, Thursday, 28 March 2019 21:23 (three months ago) link

"The world has gone crazy about food"

It's like the copy was written by a neural network

Boles to the Wolds (Noodle Vague), Sunday, 7 April 2019 21:36 (three months ago) link

two weeks pass...

Really satisfying daydream about smashing the Plusnet bloke in the face with a cricket bat

After Cease to Brexist (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 27 April 2019 13:31 (two months ago) link

You'd do us proud if you did. They're like the 118 adverts, they doggedly persist in making them, year after year, although absolutely no-one likes them or is interested in them or remembers anything about them. Their straplines are so dull the only reason you remember them at all is because you've fucking heard them a million times.

Freddie Starr (Hitler in shorts) (Tom D.), Saturday, 27 April 2019 13:59 (two months ago) link

Hilarious sex voices on supermarket food adverts, please fuck off

After Cease to Brexist (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 27 April 2019 16:38 (two months ago) link

they appear to have got rid of the original voice-over woman and are having the cast do it themselves in a slightly ironic way.

the epitome of the ads that go on forever that nobody likes = go compare

koogs, Saturday, 27 April 2019 16:47 (two months ago) link

also, that terrible "Graham, love" advert appears to have come back.

koogs, Saturday, 27 April 2019 16:47 (two months ago) link

the epitome of the ads that go on forever that nobody likes = go compare

The Go Compare ads differ from 118 and Plusnet in that they're intensely and viscerally annoying, people hate them, 118 and Plusnet aren't that interesting. Go Compare ads (tragically) have entered the national consciousness, the 118 and Plusnet ads are just there endlessly - particularly true of former, which feel like they've been running for decades without making any particular impression on anyone.

Freddie Starr (Hitler in shorts) (Tom D.), Saturday, 27 April 2019 17:54 (two months ago) link

They often make the impression on me that everybody involved in the advertising industry is a cunt

After Cease to Brexist (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 27 April 2019 17:57 (two months ago) link

That's too easy though.

Freddie Starr (Hitler in shorts) (Tom D.), Saturday, 27 April 2019 17:58 (two months ago) link

how come the UK gets its own pronunciation of Breyers?

After Cease to Brexist (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 27 April 2019 20:28 (two months ago) link

I'm irrationally angry about the Stiehl advert that only seems to be on ITV channels with numbers higher than 2 after them. There's a slowed down section of a chainsaw and, unless I'm very much mistaken, the blade is on the wrong way round.

Elitist cheese photos (aldo), Sunday, 28 April 2019 19:31 (two months ago) link

those Harvey Keitel ones where he intimidates punters into buying insurances products falls into the "never-ending, much hated campaign" category

Neil S, Monday, 29 April 2019 17:00 (two months ago) link

They're running out of steam now but I liked the earlier ones.

Freddie Starr (Hitler in shorts) (Tom D.), Monday, 29 April 2019 17:03 (two months ago) link

is this real or has someone edited two separate ads together?

I'd like my followers to try and pinpoint the single most excruciatingly element of this 1987 Daily Mirror advert. There are a few things to choose from so it won't be easy. pic.twitter.com/OAXcsePAvQ

— Ed Stradling (@edstradling) May 2, 2019

soref, Friday, 3 May 2019 08:10 (two months ago) link

Oh sweet Jesus, I've just seen the G-Tech advert with the bloke from Worcester rapping on it.

Elitist cheese photos (aldo), Sunday, 5 May 2019 19:20 (two months ago) link

Why does the new Anchor advert use the theme from Desmond's?

Elitist cheese photos (aldo), Monday, 6 May 2019 16:39 (two months ago) link

These people are determined that you pronounce their name to rhyme with 'kangaroos', even if you don't want to and even though they know no-one will.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zKsFk7Yz-KY

Ned Caligari (Tom D.), Saturday, 11 May 2019 10:33 (two months ago) link

three weeks pass...

an aside: the Dark Milk that's currently being advertised by jason donovan and kim wilde, has anyone seen any in actual shops?

koogs, Saturday, 1 June 2019 20:46 (one month ago) link

I had some, it's an unremarkable halfway house between dairy milk and bournville, almost certainly appearing at one of those shops that sells end of line food cheap near you, soon

specific goats my way (Noodle Vague), Saturday, 1 June 2019 21:15 (one month ago) link

yeah, the clue is in the name 8)

and that description makes me think of the supermarket own-brand dark chocolate that's like 35p for a large bar

koogs, Saturday, 1 June 2019 21:23 (one month ago) link

two weeks pass...

Poor guy, must need the money.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=keOaQm6RpBg

Orpheus Knutt (Tom D.), Wednesday, 19 June 2019 07:23 (one month ago) link

three weeks pass...

"and 72% of us have the same lunch every single day"

get tae fuck you lying wanker

jou're much too jung, girl (Noodle Vague), Wednesday, 10 July 2019 22:21 (one week ago) link

72,000 he says, not 72%.

koogs, Thursday, 11 July 2019 04:04 (one week ago) link

no. you're right, 72%. you're also right about that being a bag of shit.

koogs, Thursday, 11 July 2019 08:22 (one week ago) link


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