Great Real Names

Among ilxen, Ned and Matos and Martin and Lara have damn cool names, and if I'm remembering Ally's full name correctly, she sounds like a Barbara Stanwyck character.

ps he is a dick

anyway.. i used to work for a multinational company which had a searchable online name and address book. So we used to have office competitions to find the best names..

So. here we go with some of the best (and these are real employees)

Nick Sex
Shirley Shallow
Tory S Gaylord
Ricardo Cunto
Eduardo Bastardo
Eric Cartman
Mindy Smelkinson

there were loads more but i can't remember them right now...

He was a great authour, too.

Not as crowd-pleasing perhaps, but there's a statue in Madison Square in New York of a man named Roscoe Conkling.

-- jess

Oh, and my middle school band director was named Rufus Long.

Went to school with a girl who's last name was Sexe (p. "sexy") She was, too.

Geoffrey Stuart Cannon is such a bizarre formal name sometimes I can't really believe it's mine (heh "feeling slightly disconnected from one's own name c/d")

RAGGETT: "Tell me where's your fancy bread.
I need it for me, and I'm called Ned."

Edward John Moreton Drax Plunkett, Lord Dunsany

Seconding Fletrjet on both the name and his writing.

Working at a university as I do, I've come across many a mysteriously cool name. Current favorites, with slight non-google alterations (as these are folks I am currently having to bill for late books): the very Thai (I believe) Nar1n Charanvattank1t, the quite Scottish yet somehow naughty 1an Mu1r Duckles and the prime winner, someone I can only guess is from an Arabic/Dutch family of some sort, Azareen Vandervl1et Oloom1.

Also, I saw a guy named John Hancock, which is not all that unusual, but I wonder if he would make his signature an exact forgery of the founding father of the same name.

At work today the person who I was given as a sample that would show a particular system error was Mr Doh. I like to imagine that to say his name correctly you have to slap your forehead.

i loved that thread, largely because spectra got so into it! :)

Mr Dickie & Miss K Titmus

https://www.uva.nl/en/profile/j.c.hermes🕸

joke hermes

l1bertad v1tal

A1r J0rdan L0uis Qu1nto

so before she got married she was never Shona Dick?
― mick signals

https://www.theguardian.com/music/2019/aug/31/opera-singer-glyndbourne-self-taught-dvd-vuvu-mpofu

vuvu mpofu

TOday's Washington Post features a letter to the editor from one Thankful Vanderstar.

guto bebb

Pat Ham

Ruud Sweering

When you sort a list of players in Major League Baseball history alphabetically by first name, this is the full list of all the players between Simon Pond and Sol Carter.

It is not a doctored list. It is, however, an important list. pic.twitter.com/zl6fX2Ipku

— Grant Brisbee (@GrantBrisbee) September 14, 2019

DAMN

Close thread

huge fighting baseball energy

https://relevantmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/Screen-Shot-2017-10-05-at-9.32.04-AM.png

Sleve McDichael, the man, the myth, the ledeng

the opening credits of "The Chinese Stuntman", which I was watching again because I love the theme music, note that the film guest stars "Ban Rando". Their parents may or may not have named them that. Good movie.

https://youtu.be/XJ2tQUaDxaE?t=263

Tytti Typpurainen

lol i was just coming here to post that

From the Marshall Efron obit:

Alfa-Betty Olsen

xxp most of my relatives and my wife's relatives and the relatives of people I grew up with were from Finland and so were always making up fake finnish names that sound vaguely or explicitly obscene because so many of them sort of sound that way already, Tytti being a perfect example.

when my dad was a young reporter, his beat covered an area with a lot of Finno-Americans. The bureau concocted an imaginary troublemaker named Wayno Savalampi.

https://reading.academia.edu/JumblyGrindrod

Son of Professor Peter Grindrod CBE, apparently. According to his oddly thorough Wikipedia entry the family has four children, "Tom, Chris, Jumbly and Sophie", which raises all kinds of questions.

It certainly does!

this is vastly more satisfying than black sheep

"she was always sort of the jumbly grindrod"

Kent Heckenlively
https://edel-images.azureedge.net/ea/SS/images/jacket_covers/original/9781510752245_44f1c.jpg

Heckenlively is a garbage person, though

Kent Fuckenslimey

https://images.app.goo.gl/CwHV7Z8C59UzeZJ17

https://i.ebayimg.com/images/g/FFgAAOSwsbhdsKby/s-l500.jpg

Marx Lenin Dos Santos
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WY72nICEg78

Maybe not objectively a great real name but as a reporter on this story...
https://i.imgur.com/1DxGphd.png

So apparently Belinda Carlisle's replacement as drummer for the Germs in 1977 was named Donna Rhia.

Stage name. Recanted!

"Duke political-science professor D. Sunshine Hillygus, one of the study’s authors, emphasized ..."

https://www.marketwatch.com/story/heres-the-depressing-reason-why-russian-trolls-may-have-failed-at-their-mission-to-divide-america-2019-11-26?utm_source=newsletter&utm_medium=email&utm_content=new%20study%20of%20Russian%20efforts&utm_campaign=dukedailydec2

Lowmoan Spectacular

couple of great names on the current memphis tigers men's basketball roster:

Boogie Ellis
Precious Achiuwa

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Athelstan_Spilhaus

https://www.theguardian.com/profile/tulikukka-de-fresnes

"Tulikukka" literally means "fireflower"... I've never heard of such a name before, presumably her parents were hippies or something, or she's changed it as an adult.

Hmm, apparently there are 30 or so people in Finland with that name, so I guess it's not unique.

Not a name per se but three cheers for the 'first initial of first name + last name' email address convention at this one dude's place of work that resulted in me receiving correspondence from a 'CHUDSON'.

(Although it still doesn't unseat the champion from my last place of work, where our 'first four letters of last name + first initial of first name' username convention surely hung like an albatross around poor P@trick FukuShima's neck.)

Vesto Slipher

very Metal gear Solid name

One of the Great Great Real Names:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grinling_Gibbons

Great real dead names: Just saw Hetty Swales on a grave.

Septimus Neverson

Beckham Wheeler-Greenall
New Zealand
Full name Beckham Reef Wheeler-Greenall

was a toss-up between this thread and 'abysmal real names' tbh but let's be kind to beckham reef wheeler-greenall

Severin Hacker

Barby Barbara (only became this nane after marriage)

Tuna Altınel