Great Real Names

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Real names of people that are just brilliant. Brought on by hearing the Ugandan Foreign Minister on the Radio, his name is James Woodpecker Bulo, which is pretty good if you as me.

Ed (dali), Thursday, 24 April 2003 05:56 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Rufus Longstockings

jess (dubplatestyle), Thursday, 24 April 2003 06:02 (fifteen years ago) Permalink


M Matos (M Matos), Thursday, 24 April 2003 06:03 (fifteen years ago) Permalink


Leee (Leee), Thursday, 24 April 2003 06:05 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

okay i made that one up

jess (dubplatestyle), Thursday, 24 April 2003 06:10 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Booz Wierdsma exists

gabriel (gabe), Thursday, 24 April 2003 06:12 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

and i've always thought the name Raggett was cool. like a Shakespearean vagabond er something.

gabriel (gabe), Thursday, 24 April 2003 06:17 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

alain robbe-grillet ownz enough imo

Sébastien Chikara (Sébastien Chikara), Thursday, 24 April 2003 06:25 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Coco Crisp
Samantha Bond
David Duchovny, but only because it fits with "why won't you love me" in that song

Among ilxen, Ned and Matos and Martin and Lara have damn cool names, and if I'm remembering Ally's full name correctly, she sounds like a Barbara Stanwyck character.

Tep (ktepi), Thursday, 24 April 2003 06:31 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Zinedine Zidane.

James Ball (James Ball), Thursday, 24 April 2003 06:40 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Wubbo Ockels = first dutchman in space

ps he is a dick

mark s (mark s), Thursday, 24 April 2003 07:37 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

posting this anonymously as these people might just google sometime

anyway.. i used to work for a multinational company which had a searchable online name and address book. So we used to have office competitions to find the best names..

So. here we go with some of the best (and these are real employees)

Nick Sex
Shirley Shallow
Tory S Gaylord
Ricardo Cunto
Eduardo Bastardo
Eric Cartman
Mindy Smelkinson

there were loads more but i can't remember them right now...

A Nonymous (Jack Battery-Pack), Thursday, 24 April 2003 08:15 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Edward John Moreton Drax Plunkett, Lord Dunsany

He was a great authour, too.

fletrejet, Thursday, 24 April 2003 10:05 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

I knew a dude once named Ziad Ziady. Also, my step-sister's freshman-year roommate in college was supposed to be someone named Ojabberin Zayden Powpack, but she never showed.

hstencil, Thursday, 24 April 2003 12:45 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

As for bad names, a guy in my office just named his new son Laws0n K1ncade H3adl3y. Blech! So snobby sounding!

Sarah McLusky (coco), Thursday, 24 April 2003 12:49 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Come on down top Ukranian footballer, Semen Semenko

Dom Passantino (Dom Passantino), Thursday, 24 April 2003 12:49 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

There's a lawyers office I came across once when I was lost (wrong bus route) the partners' names were Hartless and Rich.

Anna (Anna), Thursday, 24 April 2003 12:50 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Spanish teacher at my middle school = AN1TA D1CK. Her husband's name = H4RRY D1CK. I. SHIT. YOU. NOT.

nickalicious (nickalicious), Thursday, 24 April 2003 12:51 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

God Shamgod
Lucky Smalls works where I do...haven't met him.

buttch (Oops), Thursday, 24 April 2003 13:48 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

There's a hockey player named Miroslav Satan.

Not as crowd-pleasing perhaps, but there's a statue in Madison Square in New York of a man named Roscoe Conkling.

Nemo (JND), Thursday, 24 April 2003 13:59 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Rocco Baldelli

Chris V. (Chris V), Thursday, 24 April 2003 14:06 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Sometimes I love my job, like yesterday when I registered a student named Bo Ning. Shouldn't laugh, but gotta really...

Archel (Archel), Thursday, 24 April 2003 14:16 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

At uni, I knew someone named Peter Handler. He didn't even understand why people giggled when they heard his name. He was such a sweet guy, too!

colette (a2lette), Thursday, 24 April 2003 14:18 (fifteen years ago) Permalink


martin mushrush (mushrush), Thursday, 24 April 2003 14:22 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Rufus Longstockings

-- jess

Oh, and my middle school band director was named Rufus Long.

martin mushrush (mushrush), Thursday, 24 April 2003 14:23 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

martin, I like your name!

hstencil, Thursday, 24 April 2003 14:25 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Hmong names are great! Friend of mine student-taught in a school with heavy Hmong population and there was a kid named Bee Lor, who signed his name with a little cartoon bee, and I think actually did go out and learn a few things about bees, ie "bee lore." Also many Hmong kids have English names that are still literal and descriptive: the girl named "Pretty Flower [xx]"

Went to school with a girl who's last name was Sexe (p. "sexy") She was, too.

Geoffrey Stuart Cannon is such a bizarre formal name sometimes I can't really believe it's mine (heh "feeling slightly disconnected from one's own name c/d")

g--ff c-nn-n (gcannon), Thursday, 24 April 2003 14:26 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Oh shit how could I forget. When I was a teenager I had a friend named Pendleton Brewster Wickersham III. Nice kid too. Probably a nice guy by now, but it's been a long time...

martin mushrush (mushrush), Thursday, 24 April 2003 14:28 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

and i've always thought the name Raggett was cool. like a Shakespearean vagabond er something.

RAGGETT: "Tell me where's your fancy bread.
I need it for me, and I'm called Ned."

Edward John Moreton Drax Plunkett, Lord Dunsany

Seconding Fletrjet on both the name and his writing.

Working at a university as I do, I've come across many a mysteriously cool name. Current favorites, with slight non-google alterations (as these are folks I am currently having to bill for late books): the very Thai (I believe) Nar1n Charanvattank1t, the quite Scottish yet somehow naughty 1an Mu1r Duckles and the prime winner, someone I can only guess is from an Arabic/Dutch family of some sort, Azareen Vandervl1et Oloom1.

Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 24 April 2003 14:46 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

he's like the rai beefheart prince!

g--ff c-nn-n (gcannon), Thursday, 24 April 2003 14:49 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

i actually really like the name Martin Skidmore. It sounds noble. Sir Martin Skidmore.

Chris V. (Chris V), Thursday, 24 April 2003 15:30 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Ransom Williams, an old friend of mine. Sounds like a black detective character in a series of mysery novels.

Scott Kos (Scott Kos), Thursday, 24 April 2003 16:29 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Best with his actual rank/title: Brigadier General Sylavanus Taco Gilbert (recently fired commandant of the US Air Force Academy).

Hurlothrumbo (hurlothrumbo), Thursday, 24 April 2003 17:12 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Sorry, make that Sylvanus Taco Gilbert III. Really.

Hurlothrumbo (hurlothrumbo), Thursday, 24 April 2003 17:13 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Peter Peters, not sure who he is, but he was the keynote speaker at a Prayer Breakfast round these parts.

Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Thursday, 24 April 2003 17:16 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Doing some data entry I ran across "Oral Honeycutt"...

cprek (cprek), Thursday, 24 April 2003 17:19 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

I paid $30 for that one time...

Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Thursday, 24 April 2003 17:20 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

You got ripped off.

cprek (cprek), Thursday, 24 April 2003 17:21 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

I know. But I did get the clap. Sort of an added value thing.

Horace Mann (Horace Mann), Thursday, 24 April 2003 17:24 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

me to thread!

slutsky (slutsky), Thursday, 24 April 2003 17:36 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

I just saw another one: Dune Combs

Also, I saw a guy named John Hancock, which is not all that unusual, but I wonder if he would make his signature an exact forgery of the founding father of the same name.

cprek (cprek), Thursday, 24 April 2003 18:13 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Thanks Chris and possibly Tep (he might have meant the other martin). Can't say I'm so keen on Skidmore myself, but I'm used to it.

At work today the person who I was given as a sample that would show a particular system error was Mr Doh. I like to imagine that to say his name correctly you have to slap your forehead.

Martin Skidmore (Martin Skidmore), Thursday, 24 April 2003 20:27 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

hey Martin, Martin is a cool name regardless of which of us he was talking about. It's a good thing at least one Chris thinks that.

martin mushrush (mushrush), Thursday, 24 April 2003 20:37 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

I like your name too, Martin. It's got a nice rhythm to it.

slutsky (slutsky), Thursday, 24 April 2003 20:48 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

There was a boatbuilding expert on telly today called Brian Labyrinth.

Matt (Matt), Thursday, 24 April 2003 20:59 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

old schoolmate: April Blue
friend who blogs: Gwenda Bond

M Matos (M Matos), Friday, 25 April 2003 06:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Best Names

i loved that thread, largely because spectra got so into it! :)

ron (ron), Friday, 25 April 2003 06:15 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

There was some important politician or someone back in the mid-nineties who was called Tokyo Sexwhale. And more recently, I was looking through my old school's Friends Reunited page searching for someone and I saw this girl from the class of 2000 who was called Jo King.

Chriddof (Chriddof), Friday, 25 April 2003 11:51 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Names of a couple I encountered while data entering:

Mr Dickie & Miss K Titmus

Nordicskillz (Nordicskillz), Thursday, 1 May 2003 09:27 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

sexwhale is pronounced sex - while (with just a hint of the wahl from mark wahlberg) - eh

mitch lastnamewithheld (mitchlnw), Thursday, 1 May 2003 10:00 (fifteen years ago) Permalink

Claria Horn Boom

earlnash, Friday, 13 April 2018 23:32 (six months ago) Permalink

that is a great name

flappy bird, Saturday, 14 April 2018 02:06 (six months ago) Permalink

Bunni Pounds

illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Saturday, 14 April 2018 08:24 (six months ago) Permalink

Haiting Yu

Louis Jägermeister (jim in vancouver), Tuesday, 24 April 2018 19:16 (five months ago) Permalink


Squeaky Fromage (VegemiteGrrl), Tuesday, 24 April 2018 21:37 (five months ago) Permalink


(Henry) Green container bin with face (Tom D.), Tuesday, 24 April 2018 21:40 (five months ago) Permalink

two weeks pass...

Googleproofing because discovered via work, but Kreshn1k Ahmetaj might be the most satisfying name I've ever encountered.

Love Theme From Oh God! You Devil (Old Lunch), Thursday, 10 May 2018 12:26 (five months ago) Permalink

i was reading an article about real estate lobbyists trying to torpedo tenant protections here in oregon, and jesus christ their lobbyist's name is literally "Shaun Jillions"

reality jumped the shark two seasons ago and needs to be cancelled

Arch Bacon (rushomancy), Thursday, 10 May 2018 14:27 (five months ago) Permalink

that is a good one

tobo73, Thursday, 10 May 2018 15:25 (five months ago) Permalink

m@rin@ f0rc3, which sounds like a v low-stakes show about cops who patrol the waterfront

Mahogany Loggins (bizarro gazzara), Thursday, 10 May 2018 15:28 (five months ago) Permalink

Eunice Groark

Hans Holbein (Chinchilla Volapük), Saturday, 12 May 2018 06:22 (five months ago) Permalink

Roscoe Klinck

( ͡☉ ͜ʖ ͡☉) (jim in vancouver), Monday, 14 May 2018 20:02 (five months ago) Permalink

Perdita Rose Annunziata Weeks (born 25 December 1985) is a British actress.
She is the younger sister of Honeysuckle Weeks and the older sister of Rollo Weeks, both actors.

Wes Brodicus, Friday, 18 May 2018 07:34 (five months ago) Permalink

Jutta Hipp

(disappointingly pronounced Yutta though)

Josefa, Friday, 18 May 2018 14:09 (five months ago) Permalink

Karla Malone!!!

I cop this squat in the name of slack (Old Lunch), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 15:24 (four months ago) Permalink


obviously DLC (Karl Malone), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 15:34 (four months ago) Permalink

i've spend the day listening to the new record from swedish electronic composer Kali Malone

chant down basildon (NickB), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 16:20 (four months ago) Permalink

Also in the course of my work today, I came across someone with my first name and the last name Dupepe. I am immensely jealous of this person (because I am amused in approximately the same way an eight-year-old is amused).

I cop this squat in the name of slack (Old Lunch), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 16:22 (four months ago) Permalink

Old Dupepe?

illegal economic migration (Tracer Hand), Wednesday, 23 May 2018 17:56 (four months ago) Permalink

ot, but that Kali Malone album is niiice

Mince Pramthwart (James Morrison), Thursday, 24 May 2018 11:04 (four months ago) Permalink

Torsten Slama

Pardew to Megson: "you've stolen my New Orleans bounce" (DJ Mencap), Thursday, 7 June 2018 13:36 (four months ago) Permalink

Sharula Dux-Box

you bet, nancy (map), Friday, 8 June 2018 19:15 (four months ago) Permalink

all-time name

— kill 💀 tim 💀 faust (@crulge) June 7, 2018

Wag1 Shree Rajneesh (ShariVari), Friday, 8 June 2018 19:35 (four months ago) Permalink

always saw this on a sign for a closed down insurance location. would make a great dom name:

Hazy Maze Cave (Adam Bruneau), Friday, 8 June 2018 19:43 (four months ago) Permalink

Sharula Dux-Box

― you bet, nancy (map), Friday, June 8, 2018 8:15 PM (twenty-eight minutes ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

and her husband's name is (was?) Shield

you bet, nancy (map), Friday, 8 June 2018 19:45 (four months ago) Permalink

real estate agents should be banned from this thread

you bet, nancy (map), Friday, 8 June 2018 19:46 (four months ago) Permalink


Hazy Maze Cave (Adam Bruneau), Friday, 8 June 2018 20:03 (four months ago) Permalink

Thurl Arthur Ravenscroft (/ˈθɜːrl ˈreɪvənzkrɒft/; February 6, 1914 – May 22, 2005) was an American voice actor and bass singer known as the booming voice behind Tony the Tiger in Kellogg's Frosted Flakes for more than five decades. He was also the uncredited vocalist for the song "You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch" from the classic Christmas television special, Dr. Seuss' How the Grinch Stole Christmas!

Hazy Maze Cave (Adam Bruneau), Thursday, 14 June 2018 04:27 (four months ago) Permalink

last two have been 👍🏻👍🏻👍🏻

Squeaky Fromage (VegemiteGrrl), Saturday, 16 June 2018 03:51 (four months ago) Permalink

three weeks pass...

Velvet Milkman

( ͡☉ ͜ʖ ͡☉) (jim in vancouver), Friday, 13 July 2018 21:15 (three months ago) Permalink

Feather Burns

a shomin-geki poster with some horror elements (WilliamC), Friday, 13 July 2018 21:25 (three months ago) Permalink

can’t stop lolling at ‘velvet milkman’, holy shit

look, you’re just gonna get gravy on the baby sometimes 🤷‍♂️ (bizarro gazzara), Friday, 13 July 2018 21:26 (three months ago) Permalink

damn those are a couple of winners

tobo73, Saturday, 14 July 2018 03:04 (three months ago) Permalink

"Keep on Dancing" is notable for the fact that it is actually one short recording repeated in order to stretch the record out to the length of the typical pop single of its day. The second part of the song (after the false fade, beginning with Gentrys drummer Larry Wall's drum fill) is the same as the first. Although the Gentrys usually had Jimmy Hart and Bruce Bowles as singers, the band's guitarist, Larry Raspberry, sang lead vocals on the song.

Hazy Maze Cave (Adam Bruneau), Sunday, 15 July 2018 15:45 (three months ago) Permalink

Haha great run itt lately

Centipedes? In this economy? (wins), Sunday, 15 July 2018 15:59 (three months ago) Permalink

and the only computer user who never stopped using TopView!

Karl Malone, Monday, 16 July 2018 15:05 (three months ago) Permalink

one month passes...

Reserve FFA Champion Market Hog, 2018 Santa Barbara Co. Fair, shown by Maximus Guerra

WmC, Thursday, 30 August 2018 16:24 (one month ago) Permalink

Zephyr Teachout

Absolute Unit Delta Plus (Noel Emits), Thursday, 30 August 2018 16:34 (one month ago) Permalink

Google-proofing because it's someone I know IRL: K1f Z1gaf00s.

Eliza D., Wednesday, 5 September 2018 13:24 (one month ago) Permalink

two weeks pass...

mick signals, Wednesday, 3 October 2018 16:12 (two weeks ago) Permalink


Squeaky Fromage (VegemiteGrrl), Wednesday, 3 October 2018 16:35 (two weeks ago) Permalink

C. J. Beathard

Hans Holbein (Chinchilla Volapük), Tuesday, 16 October 2018 01:47 (five days ago) Permalink


Madchen, Tuesday, 16 October 2018 17:26 (five days ago) Permalink

Cassius Goens III

calzino, Thursday, 18 October 2018 08:25 (three days ago) Permalink

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