abysmal real names

tanner flake

Beryl Sprinkel

jonjo shelvey

:D

Spanky deBrest

Ed Balls

tin jedvaj

All of these are good names. Except maybe Ed Balls.

kirsten flipkens

every baby born with a name spelled "Aidyn"

Aidyn Jaden Brayden Kayden

just found out our house sitter's name is McKensie Phillips

Acquaintance of a friend is naming her daughter Kynaidegh. Pronounced Kennedy apparently.

oy

marcus mumford

a girl in one of my courses last semester was named "LoveRa", pronounced "luhv-RAH"

used to work with someone that had the (Dutch) last name of Updegrave, her brother was named 'Doug', srsly

there's a poet named Allison Benis White

Marvin Ducksch

Stephen Yaxley-Lennon

paul potts

nick ferrari

yeah i hate him and his shit name (nico smith would be shit too)

Vance Blanc

Tony Discipline

Sab Deol said he was punched twice by Discipline inside the VIP area at the club, prompting his cousin to intervene.

Both men said they had done nothing to provoke the attack.

Discipline smiled and nodded at the jury as he was released from the dock to join his parents, who wept with joy.

He shouted “Yes” before hugging girlfriend Jacqueline Jossa, 19, who plays Lauren Branning in the BBC soap.

Had the case not been thrown out she had been due to give evidence in support of Discipline.

http://www.192.com/atoz/people/surnames/discipline/50/

fuck, i love finding out about rare english surnames

the d1ciplines are mostly clustered around welling, rochester, thamesmead and other estuarial pleasure palaces

r1cky and c0nstance probably my favourites

tony d is just a vile name though

sidcup's w4yne d1scipline is verging on something that glib little fuckboy martin amis might have contrived

gav indiscipline is quite good

you shd come and live in the SE outposts nakhers

cultural bouillabaisse beyond compare

Beryl Sprinkel

Beryl Sprinkel

― A deeper shade of lol (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 12 June 2013 23:48 (4 months ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

lj you could get an incisive and coruscating sunday broadsheet article by tracking the disciplines around their endz

go to the post office and put up a sheet of tattered quarto with a single scrawled inscription IS THIS THE END FOR MR DISCIPLINE

Beryl Wayne Sprinkel (November 20, 1923 – August 22, 2009)[1] was a member of the Executive Office of the US President and chairman of the Council of Economic Advisors (CEA) between April 4, 1985 and January 21, 1989,[2] during the Reagan administration.

haha you didn't tell us there was a WAYNE in the middle

Discipline and Greenwich

Orly Taitz

Imogen Poots

Imogen Gay Poots

Imogen Heap too

Lol Creme

Joey Essex. I genuinely thought that was a nickname until today.

Justin Lookadoo

Donny Dugdale
Mickeylee Macken

are two that just came up at work. Awful.

rooney mara

I've become accustomed to that one

blake bortles

Donny Dugdale
Mickeylee Macken

are two that just came up at work. Awful.

― Windsor Davies, Tuesday, 19 November 2013 14:54 (3 months ago)

lol

Rougned Odor

it’s also kind of awesome though

and he’s the only consistent player the Yankees seem to have

The backstory of Rougned Odor's name makes it even more awesomely abysmal. "Rougned" is a combination of his grandfather's name Douglas and his grandmother's name Nedia... but since all the males in his family have names beginning with the letter "R" they changed the "D" to "R." And who would want to be called Dougned Odor after all.

hahaha i am dying

incredible

Rougned Odor more like RaggNed Odsbloodhathilxnothreadforanticipationofthor. If you ask me

From today's Dear Prudence column at Slate:

"Help! My Parents Gave Me a Wacky, Offensive Name.
I had it legally changed, and they still won’t stop using it."

Dear Prudence,

My parents gave me a really terrible name, that half-rhymes and contains a racial slur--think “Gypsy-Pixie,” and misspelled. (We are a white family.)...

So what could her name really be? (Is it really obvious and I'm being dense?)

Tipsy Dixie?

sorry, Typsi Dick C.

I don't think it rhymes with Gypsy-Pixie, it has an internal rhyme

Hammond Gammon

please to insert the misspelling yourself

His uncle, Rouglas, played for eight seasons in Minor League Baseball for the Cleveland and Milwaukee Brewers organizations,[4][7]

https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTrl1AJclpQu0oKUD_wcjpujruerVit-fVA3FNyxRi4vFO4vE-YG1vWHfMysr5tf6Lodnw&usqp=CAU

thanks for the new dn

https://i.redd.it/k4z7vvh8ozd21.png

LOL

"Mummy, I did a Poppie Platt in my pants".

Amelia Gentleman

...mindbending chemicals

for reference

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LNm66KzI7Vk

Didn’t know whether to put this in the great or abysmal category so I went with both:

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Penda_Hair

Named after the 7th Century King of Mercia? or at least named after his hair.

steele fortress

https://i.imgur.com/ecbCJhN.jpg

https://scontent.fmel8-1.fna.fbcdn.net/v/t1.6435-9/237842780_10159694695486926_6567710758222200487_n.jpg?_nc_cat=111&ccb=1-5&_nc_sid=825194&_nc_ohc=sWr9U-Kl69gAX-6X_jt&_nc_ht=scontent.fmel8-1.fna&oh=a482136af965447bf60077db2e3060c0&oe=614CA0D8

Uh oh here come sic

https://meridiancity.org/council/tregbernt

I was contacted by a headhunter with the name of Pr3slee Fudge the other day.

I really have a hard time believing someone named their daughter Trashelle or Hilaria.

Hilaria doesn't seem that unusual or abysmal. Isn't it just the Spanish (or perhaps more broadly Latin) equivalent of Hilary?

Hilario is the male equivalent.

'Trashelle' is a really hard one to comprehend; if a fictional character who is the wife of a wealthy construction company owner and right-wing nutjob from suburban Boise had that name it would seem absolutely over the top and unbelievable.

Ok, I'll concede on Hilaria...but Trashelle? That is one of those things that is if this is all a simulation then the creator is just having LOL.

my sister never got over the one kid she taught in her junior high class name Lemóngelo pronounce sadly as you might imagine it was.

lol. but wouldn't the accent suggest Leh-MON-jeh-lo?

(with the same rhythm as 'D'Angelo'?)

my sister never got over the one kid she taught in her junior high class name Lemóngelo pronounce sadly as you might imagine it was.

― When Young Sheldon began to rap (forksclovetofu), Friday, October 8, 2021 1:13 AM (seven hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

Sorry if I'm missing the joke, but you know this is an urban legend, right? https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-2009-feb-07-oe-daum7-story.html

Lemongello is a real surname though. There was a popular cabaret singer in the 1970s named Peter Lemongello (accent on the "mon"). He had a cousin named Mark Lemongello who was a professional baseball player in the major leagues (late '70s).

Trivia tidbit: In Martin Scorsese's The Irishman Joey Gallo gets whacked at Umberto's Clam House after a celebratory evening at the Copacabana where Jerry Vale (Steven Van Zandt) is the featured singer. But in the real life incident in 1972, Gallo had actually been at the Copacabana enjoying Peter Lemongello's performance.

I will concede that it's possible that forks's sister had a student named Lemongelo after the surname Lemongello, but it would be an incredible coincidence, given that I've been hearing since I was a kid that somebody's sister or cousin or sister's cousin totally had a student named "Lemonjello" with a stress on the first o, they swear, why would they lie.

She swears, why would she lie?
Tbf I don’t always trust my sister so…

some context here

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cSBVuImIFkQ

Lemonjelly.ky only sold 10,000 copies, but everyone who bought it named their kid something really weird.

She don't use lemmonjello

Peter Crummey

Joe Bott

(Seen on political lawn signs)

Neal Fresby

Thanks again, Wiki:Matt Abts (born September 30, 1953) is an American drummer,[1] best known as one of the founding members of the rock band Gov't Mule... Abts joined (Warren) Haynes and Allen Woody, who had both been members of The Allman Brothers Band, to form Gov't Mule in 1994. Before that, Abts and Haynes played with Dickey Betts; Haynes and Woody also played with Dickey in The Allman Brothers Band.

Matt Abts is merely impossible to pronounce so I'm assuming Allen Woody the abysmal name there?

Matt Abts, Allen Woody, Dickey Betts: I bow to all three (re xpost progression from abysmal to awesome), but especially the first, because, yes, say it and you sound like you're having a stroke ("LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, GIVE IT UP FOR)