Aston Villa won't win the league - Premier League 2024/25

No thanks to them loddup the road!

Dom Solanke to Spurs, something presumably happened in the Charity shield nobody cares, will United and/or Chelsea stop being mediocre etc etc

Man Utd vs Fulham Friday 14th will be your opener

is this an attempt to triple jinx it

have villa really spent 150m or whatever?

first big prediction: postecoglou will be gone by november

I'm more just trying to take our turn in the spotlight of the thread title while the iron is hot

I can see us slipping back at least a bit this season tbh, but maybe Maatsen and Onana could add some energy, and maybe Buendia and Tielemans might be able to do a bit more?

I don't think anyone really knows how much we've spent, it's all obfuscated in layers of FFP voodoo, all of our fans have become amateur accountants and want Daddy Nas to sue the Premier League over their bad unfair financial restrictions alongside Man City, who have always been our good friends and not cheats that we hate or whatever

Unai Emery gone by 2025 as they hugely underperform is my hottake mushroom

This Bobb cat looks pretty good

I've been hearing about the 'rich seven' this season. Congratulations to Villa and all who sail in them

Please substitute "voodoo" above for "bullshit" or something else less dumb and bad to say in 2024 thx

Feel like we're going to sell loads of players before the window ends and end up annoyingly light at CB and CF. Our fans are also obsessed with signing Joao Felix at any cost and it's like...why?

, jaoen?

lolverpool

Utd continuing their metamorphosis into a shit Ajax tribute act with the signings of de Ligt and Mazraoui

ive no idea if de ligt is still good or even ever was at this stage, perhaps nobody is good now and its mainly about the coach and director of kegal affairs having a shared vision

also does anyone have any fairh that this is really really it for city this time

typical enough that they never even beat us into second ffs so no justice for poch

well I'm excited to see Amad get more minutes this season

New signings seem like a bit of a toss-up, but at least they weren't Antony money

Don't trust the manager or a lot of the players that are still there

here we fucking go

Have United got a striker? I'm confused

Hojlund is injured and new signing Zirkzee isn't match fit apparently

Could do with him coming on but it'll probably be McTominay

i think you should be allowed shoot a player that does what pereira did there

fatally, i mean, no fucking knees or elbows or "fir a lesson" bullshit, just save the wasted shoes and air and all and put him down

wait til ye hear how i comment on spurs players this season btw

whats the ref booked him for there then?

ref is making some clasdic calls here, nothing that will make motd just letting the away team know theyre in a game

I believe it was for waving an imaginary card

they tend to get a few of those in at the start of season and then forget about it

very weird subs, very Ten Hag

neat finish that

yeah, clever

reminds me of when i switch from pro evo to fifa and keep shooting woth ciecle tho

that wont be beat this season

i'm not one to point the finger at people who've learned nothing but ten Hag has learned nothing

Cantona nopes out, relatable.

Eric Cantona suddenly realising he had made a terrible mistake 😂😭
pic.twitter.com/ake9soozxA

— Footy Humour (@FootyHumour) August 17, 2024

i was happy to treat today as a free hit and expect our poor form against Arsenal to continue but after 5 minutes of listening to the BBC's Arsenal hype machine on the radio i hope we murder them

3 minutes in, referee is a homer cunt, gonna be a good afternoon

our shirts look disappointly yellow

just realised Doherty's started ffs GON Out

Nice recovery defending by Lemina

after watching England in the Euros i'd forgotten Rice actually comes out of his own half

our commitment to playing out from the back is enjoyable and nerve-shredding all at the same time

Gotta weather this

The Cantona thing was just an elaborate advert instead of anything good.

Gotta weather this

kiss of death but i think we've been ok so far, lotta possession conceded but mostly not where it matters

god i wish we'd sell Sa

Ugh. Nice header but allowing that free cross in was a mistake

ok fuck's sake shit defending

God I think Kai might be my favourite player in the game at the moment.

we was right to sell Pedro but we're gonna miss him like fuck as the out ball in these situations

Omg Larsen so close

Incredible save

bettah

i'm a little worried that Larsen mightn't do enough, quickly enough, but he's exactly what we need

missing Cunha tho

Toti just blowing it

I'll take 1-0?

All things considered

i think we've been 90% solid

Andre looks a real baller already

you lucky fuckers

screamers are back baby :/

yeah wish i hadn't said that

i'll admit thru gritted teeth that was a great save by Pope

hows the spurs match going?

Never in doubt

jammy gits

Absolute robbery, tbh.

never been one for a league cup run but it did sting a bit, we should probably have tried defending in the last six minutes tbf

Not Chelsea 2nd on the table for the next couple hours

no finer Saturday ritual than trying to find a working stream before Wolves are a goal down

Martinez with the assist for Wolves

my bad, that's all Carlos

good half from the Wolves, maybe today's the day we manage two good halves. and even as i type that i see the spectre of Doherty coming on and shudder

feeble from Semedo

well there we go again

Another incredible milestone for Boring Goal Mutant

The Premier League conspiring to come up with ways to make steam come out of Arteta's ears is p funny

Really into like tactical fouling and subtle niggly dark arts shit, but also absolutely fucking terrible at getting away with it

Fairly limp stuff from Arsenal this half. Not sure they can sit this deep and get away with it.

Fergie time

They're gonna have an unbeaten season aren't they

oh there was apparently a Spurs game this aft!

oh no I was looking at the woman's results section. I thought how on earth can a Spurs game evade the attention of this thread.

This was funny though.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CP1M_FuFNRQ

Cole Palmer though.

Nice for Chelsea to have one good player

Yeah look it’s plenty of fun right now ngl

I had thoughts but anyway
.

the reffing of artetas arsenal team will be subject of documentaries in time

Ref would have to improve significantly to be a cunt

Christ the lad can shift

deems are you okay

its good isnt it

a few earlier strikes be no harm when the ball comes across

no faith we can defend effectively for the remainder

hope udogie can stay on, werner not much good without an in form pair of he and madison around him

good game

would really rather be the deserved two goals up rather than merely lucky to be ahead at this stage, after that start tbf

Beginning to think the new owners have a humiliation fetish

The manager certainly does

well he is dutch

yeah this is finishing 2-1

thats not a red and var should cancel it imo

its a trip

me being me id really like to be able to give out about how poor johnson was there but

Not really looking forward to the van Nistelrooy era tbh

its a bit soon for rooney all the same

Wonder how we'll conspire to lose to this shower next week

Half the team injured while conceding penalties against Bayern maybe

werner passing it softly to the opposition keeper will never get new

be very like spurs to walk around hands out all game now to give away a few stupid penalties

another united man off and a third goal and id start to enioy this

shitting myself tbh

weve played an unregistered player or something