mom placation was ironing by which mens perrypops in a womansuit is the new child mystericating teats that can taint baconated digestive broads plastercasting gnostically from the great gospel wwjh

The best part of the day was thoroughly terrifying the birthday boy.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, KID

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zFx2hSkuWk8

wtf

Pretty sure that's not what Marie Antoinette meant...

The first related video is also a trifle troubling.

Okay, I could see the photo in the link. AWESOME/HILARIOUS/THX

I can't wait until I get the actual child-scaring pictures from my friends!

If only there was a video.

Probably something like this:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HY6wVf0weOw

This is my favorite metafilter thread of ... ever ?

http://ask.metafilter.com/99371/Has-my-cat-lost-her-mind

including this quote

This one time my sister's cat took a poop, but due to some freak of feline digestive system, a long hair was stuck in the poop, and lead back towards the cat's butt, where it was stuck inside another (assumed) poop that remained inside the cat in question once the cat started its victory lap. The victory lap turned to horror as the cat found itself being chased by its own poop like a boat dragging an angry water skier.

After she caught the cat, my sister calmly took a paper towel, grabbed the trailing hair, and yanked. The anchoring turd popped out of the cat, and all was well.

remy, that quote alone is so insane that I'm afraid to look at the rest of the site!

guys: sharon jones is incredible! the timbre hearing her live is like 3x more than what a recording is able to capture. she is my hero.

Oh, tza, I'm so envious that you had such an incredible night tonight!!!

SUSHI BURPS ARE GROSS

I have to think that the sushi eating was worth it, though.

mmm sushi. actually, sara, the night part was meh (concert was during the day) and included eating really mediocre uws food for my friend's birthday where she was kind of wasted and obnoxious and then i had to spend an hour getting home, but you know, the day part made up for it.

dnw: work today. however, 5 days left!

Hey, at least the concert part sounded okay!

I seem to have attracted a passive-aggressive nut, commenting on one of my reviews at Epini0ns. I think this is the first time this has ever happened in, like, 8 years. Possibly just someone wanting attention, but it is kind of jarring.

My apologies for that. I am human and I need to be loved.

There's a club for people like you, if you'd like to go.

ps Sara, do you remember my college roommate J4mes and his wife J3nny from the clambake? They might make it out to the fair.

CLAMBAKE

No, BLAMCAKE. C'mon now.

ughhhhhhhh he is being sooo passive aggressive today!!!!!

want to go home!!!

Hello all, back at work after holidays. admittedly I am in our office in New York which is a little more exciting than Mitcham, south west london, lunch will be better at least.

Oh, Ned, if it's you then I'm okay with it.

Dan, of course I remember your roommate and his wife. (And I remember that they have twins - they seemed so well rested...). Also lol CLAMBAKE

tehresa- hang in there! Only a few more dayzzzz.

And HI ED!

hey guess what? expense reports suck

Just say that you bought Louis as the company's manservant.

total for expense report #1: $1574.39 (this btw is missing a dinner)

lol that's a cheap manservant

which is why you acquired Louis and not a superior model of manservant.

ummmm tying up loose ends... i think i'm done... what will i do for 4 more days???

AHAHAHAHAHA. Spidermang!

lolz I fucked up the exchange rate so the actual total for report #1 is 1731.43 (oops)

Manservant appreciation value for resale!

Does he do windows?

In my opinion, doing windows is what makes or breaks a manservant.

expense report #2: $931.41

neither of these include the expenses for changing my vacation btw

lolz I fucked up the exchange rate so the actual total for report #1 is 1731.43 (oops)

-- HI DERE, Monday, 18 August 2008 19:07 (19 minutes ago) Bookmark Link

Make sure you use whatever the crappiest one your credit card used. It can add an extra 10% or so to these.

boss accused me of taking this job with a plan all along to quit at the end of the summer. i would direct him to this thread and how excited i was to get a job and the hopes i had for this in order to prove my innocence, but i think that might be a bad idea.

In my opinion, doing windows is what makes or breaks a manservant.

What would Sara's reality show about breaking manservants be called?

He does realize that you want to have a job, right?

I suppose it would not be polite to say, "well, no, I wanted to take this job, but it turns out you are keeee-razy..."

xp Ned, that is an excellent question, and as soon as you have the answer, I plan to pitch it to the major networks.

Make sure you use whatever the crappiest one your credit card used. It can add an extra 10% or so to these.

This is exactly what I did!

yeah basically i can't be like 'uh i was rly excited but you are batshit!' so i am like 'uh the commute is just too much' (which is also true, just only part of it...)

try "i ran out of stuff to steal" - should be a good conversation stopper

lolol in response to pretty much all of you

You can tell him that the constant accusations make you glad you quit, maybe? Then kick him in the nuts?

What would Sara's reality show about breaking manservants be called?

nut kicking would be awesome, btw. but also kinda not.