the landfill that time forgot: crap uk bands of 00s/10s

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Poll Results

OptionVotes
scouting for girls 20
mumford and sons 11
toploader 9
the futureheads 7
biffy clyro 7
razorlight 6
florence and the machine 5
the stereophonics 5
snow patrol 4
the fratellis 4
kasabian 4
kaiser chiefs 4
the kooks 3
joe lean and the jing jang jong 3
hard-fi 3
babyshambles 3
the zutons 2
the twang 2
hundred reasons 2
keane 2
the courteeners 2
starsailor 2
the cribs 1
noah and the whale 1
the ordinary boys 1
the hoosiers 1
the magic numbers 0
the enemy 0
the wombats 0
the view 0
the feeling 0
the rakes 0
the others 0
pigeon detectives 0
athlete 0


nulty dread (nakhchivan), Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:31 (3 years ago) Permalink

Oh God.

Pisle of dogs (seandalai), Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:32 (3 years ago) Permalink

Are we voting for redeeming features, heartfelt loathing or comedy value?

Pisle of dogs (seandalai), Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:33 (3 years ago) Permalink

heartfelt loathing or comedy value

nulty dread (nakhchivan), Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:34 (3 years ago) Permalink

thankfully haven't knowingly heard anything by at least half of these.

ledge, Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:34 (3 years ago) Permalink

The Automatic seems like an important omission. They had that song.

Pisle of dogs (seandalai), Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:34 (3 years ago) Permalink

i am now actively trying to remember a song that i despise and would rather not give any more headroom to, just to figure out which of these fuckers is responsible

ledge, Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:36 (3 years ago) Permalink

I always thought The Hoosiers were American for some reason.

nate woolls, Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:36 (3 years ago) Permalink

Scouting For Girls are the shittiest band here, by a long way.

nate woolls, Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:37 (3 years ago) Permalink

The Automatic seems like an important omission. They had that song.

― Pisle of dogs (seandalai), Thursday, February 17, 2011 3:34 PM (4 minutes ago) Bookmark

I think I might like that song more than any song from any of these jokers.

Inevitable stupid dubstep mix (chap), Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:40 (3 years ago) Permalink

I always thought The Hoosiers were American for some reason.

almost got ^these guys confused with Hooters who are not at all the worst thing ever...

kingkongvsbasedgodzilla (Drugs A. Money), Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:40 (3 years ago) Permalink

nulty dread (nakhchivan), Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:41 (3 years ago) Permalink

Actually Kaiser chiefs had a couple of decent choruses.

The Hoosiers are such a bunch of twats.

Inevitable stupid dubstep mix (chap), Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:41 (3 years ago) Permalink

Hang on, are we voting for the worst? That's kind of impossible.

Inevitable stupid dubstep mix (chap), Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:44 (3 years ago) Permalink

^^^
Scouting for Girls make me forget doors exist. By the second chorus of "She's So Lovely", I'm generally found whipping around the room looking for a small table to throw through a window so I can escape.

chandelier falling through a bar in a batman costume (dog latin), Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:44 (3 years ago) Permalink

At least the Automatic were good enough to ensure they remained a simple novelty band by releasing just one silly song and never bothering anyone again.

chandelier falling through a bar in a batman costume (dog latin), Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:45 (3 years ago) Permalink

wtf are the Futureheads doing here? Their first album was awesome from start to finish.

nate woolls, Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:46 (3 years ago) Permalink

The View had a really good song on their second album called 5Rebecccas or something.

chandelier falling through a bar in a batman costume (dog latin), Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:47 (3 years ago) Permalink

It's quite impressive that even on a list containing Toploader, The Kooks and The View, Scouting For Girls are still the worst.

nate woolls, Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:47 (3 years ago) Permalink

Florence & The Machine do not belong here, should be no girls in this poll unless they're playing bass.

Matt DC, Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:50 (3 years ago) Permalink

athlete - CONTENDERS. Coldplay without the musical and lyrical savagery

babyshambles - couple of decent singles imo, clearly horrible people and fans but hey that's indie rock and roll

biffy clyro - CONTENDERS. I have never knowingly heard a Biffy Clyro song yet I can still smell them from here

florence and the machine - fucking horrible but hey sexism

hard-fi - don't really hate these much but remember I never read any music press or watch interviews ever

hundred reasons - don't remember much about them, some kind of comedy fake Metal band yeah?

joe lean and the jing jang jong - probably the biggest individual cunt on this cunt-packed list but fortunately never lived to inflict music on me. may have been some kind of LJ-ish performance art joke?

kaiser chiefs - CONTENDERS. Scum de la Scum, the sound of a service station convenience store on the M62 stamping on a human ear, forever

kasabian - CONTENDERS. Just enormous wonky tools, a cross between everything that's terrible about the Doors, Primal Scream and Oasis bafflingly adored by blokes with indie haircuts who turned thirty last year

keane - soft target soft scoop shite, too pop and occasionally pleasant to win this thing

mumford and sons - CONTENDERS. I honestly thought at the time that I wd never see anything worse than the Levellers while I lived

noah and the whale - jesus who are these gobshites?

pigeon detectives - got nothing, assume they're shit, I've probably heard something by them on account of the fucking terrible indie disco in the Piper on a Friday

razorlight - I quite like that "Trouble in America" song for some reason, clearly nothing to do with the horribleness of these Ikea no-marks

scouting for girls - CONTENDERS. I honestly have mutilation fantasies about these. Angry, angry fans for some reason

snow patrol - I liked that one about standing up but the one about lying down is the worst "give me a cuddle and a mug of soup" pandering shite I've ever heard in all my life

starsailor - quite funny. in retrospect. it hurt at the time

the courteeners - great band name, great lads, hope to fuck I never hear what they sound like

the cribs - fuck knows

the enemy - I honestly really like "We'll Live and Die etc etc" sorry

the feeling - I honestly really like that fill my little teacup up song except the lyrics, sweet tune and arrangement imo

the fratellis - CONTENDERS. the cunt's cunts

the futureheads - yeah cheers for the Kate Bush cover you useless sub-XTC-when-they-was-shit twats

the hoosiers - in many ways I hate these more than Scatting for Girls but they are sort of too risible plus their fans are less angry. they should drown in slurry tho

the kooks - is this the buskers band? EVIL BEYOND FUCKING BELIEF if so

the magic numbers - pleasant sub-Beautiful South middle-aged couple music iirc, can't place them here

the ordinary boys - I think the dude's suffered enough

the others - fuck knows

the rakes - hey hey it's the Strokees

the stereophonics - CONTENDERS. honoured too many times for their services to the cause of evil to get my vote here. don't think the dude's suffered enough

the twang - fuck knows. assume they're no Blak Twang

the view - or are these the buskers twats? fuck knows tbh

the wombats - are some of these made up?

the zutons - fucking shit but at least they had a sax which means hey they're not the worst fucking shit

toploader - ONE HIT CONTENDERS. clearly need to die, but the ex has suffered enough imo

I've got to vote Scouting for Girls in the end, but there's a special circle of hell where this whole gang is the playlist and I regret all the mean things I've said and done

Elmer Fuiud (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:52 (3 years ago) Permalink

HArd to argue with SfG, but Chelsea Dagger is the shitehawk national anthem & may swing me to ver frats.

portrait of velleity (woof), Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:53 (3 years ago) Permalink

glad I have never heard most of these bands.

skip, Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:53 (3 years ago) Permalink

i don't know why i'm doing this to myself... but maybe someone here can help me remember the terrible awful no-good song that was by one of these bands or someone like them. an xfm favourite a year or two ago, lyrical themes: don't be sad, you're still young, remember that time we took a record player somewhere and played some tunes, oh yeah that was top.

ledge, Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:53 (3 years ago) Permalink

xps - I think the band that has annoyed me most often is actually The Fratellis.

Pisle of dogs (seandalai), Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:54 (3 years ago) Permalink

the stereophonics - CONTENDERS. honoured too many times for their services to the cause of evil to get my vote here. don't think the dude's suffered enough

he did kill himself to be fair

for all the fucked-up children of this world we give you 1p3 (history mayne), Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:55 (3 years ago) Permalink

I was aware of that.

Elmer Fuiud (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:56 (3 years ago) Permalink

Holloways, Music Generator?

portrait of velleity (woof), Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:56 (3 years ago) Permalink

(an answer to ledge, that)

portrait of velleity (woof), Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:57 (3 years ago) Permalink

WHERE IS THE SCRIPT

Evan, Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:58 (3 years ago) Permalink

xp that was it. thanks. "thanks". actually the name has not yet triggered any memory of the music, thank fuck.

ledge, Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:58 (3 years ago) Permalink

xp - The Script are Irish iirc.

Pisle of dogs (seandalai), Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:59 (3 years ago) Permalink

i have never heard scouting for girls or read anything about them. can someone explain why they are the worst please?

Damn this thread seems so....different without ilxor (ilxor), Thursday, 17 February 2011 15:59 (3 years ago) Permalink

Oh.

Evan, Thursday, 17 February 2011 16:00 (3 years ago) Permalink

God I hate the Script though.

Evan, Thursday, 17 February 2011 16:00 (3 years ago) Permalink

I'd forgotten all about The Zutons! (I guess that's probably for the best.)

Johnny Fever, Thursday, 17 February 2011 16:00 (3 years ago) Permalink

hmmmm

i think both the first futureheads album and the first rakes album are classics (haven't listened to the latter in years tbh but i fucked heavy w/ it when i was 17)

i've enjoyed a number of songs by snow patrol, the cribs, and, yes, razorlight

they had that song: the zutons, the magic numbers, kaiser chiefs, keane & hard-fi (i used to bang that one joint that was on fifa 06, maybe it was "cash machine"?)

the band on here that i've heard the most shitty music by is kasabian, and i'd be tempted to vote for them but really i can vote for no one besides joe lean and the jing jang jong, from the shitty name right on down to the fact that they made the cover of NME and still never made an album

pigeon detectives & scouting for girls are runners up

J0rdan S., Thursday, 17 February 2011 16:01 (3 years ago) Permalink

seminal fuiud (NickB), Thursday, 17 February 2011 16:01 (3 years ago) Permalink

seminal fuiud (NickB), Thursday, 17 February 2011 16:02 (3 years ago) Permalink

Somehow, for me, The Killers made the song that even more than "Chelsea Dagger" sums up everything that this tremendous movement stands for.

It's a black hole of shite and terror.

Elmer Fuiud (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 17 February 2011 16:03 (3 years ago) Permalink

bands on this list i have knowingly heard:

babyshambles - horrible
florence and the machine - not my thing, but she doesn't belong in a UK indie landfill poll
kaiser chiefs - horrible, but not as bad as several of the others
kasabian - horrible
keane - horrible
mumford and sons - what the fucking fuck
snow patrol - horrible
the cribs - lol johnny marr
the futureheads - not actively offensive
the magic numbers - not actively offensive
the stereophonics - horrible

Damn this thread seems so....different without ilxor (ilxor), Thursday, 17 February 2011 16:04 (3 years ago) Permalink

voted mumford & sons

Damn this thread seems so....different without ilxor (ilxor), Thursday, 17 February 2011 16:04 (3 years ago) Permalink

wow i had no idea the killers had a song called "indie rock & roll" -- thank god i'm at work and have no way of listening to it

J0rdan S., Thursday, 17 February 2011 16:04 (3 years ago) Permalink

the wombats & the courteneers really bring me back to the time in high school where i used to read nme irl

J0rdan S., Thursday, 17 February 2011 16:05 (3 years ago) Permalink

I first heard the Killers track in a friend's car on a landfill compilation and assumed it was by one of the tossers on the list until I looked it up.

Elmer Fuiud (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 17 February 2011 16:05 (3 years ago) Permalink

Being completely candid, even though seeing the names listed like this makes my heart feel heavy and grey:

Like one song by: Athlete (1st album), Florence, Hard-Fi, Kasabian, Keane, Starsailor, Futureheads, Magic Numbers, Twang, View
Like a whole album by: Babyshambles, Rakes, Kaiser Chiefs

Voted Toploader.

DL, Thursday, 17 February 2011 16:06 (3 years ago) Permalink

Yeah, Magic Numbers don't bother me at all, they're sweet overweight aging hippies who like to sing pleasant vocal harmonies.

Inevitable stupid dubstep mix (chap), Thursday, 17 February 2011 16:06 (3 years ago) Permalink

you know who belonged on here even tho I liked a couple of their songs? Maximo Park

Elmer Fuiud (Noodle Vague), Thursday, 17 February 2011 16:08 (3 years ago) Permalink

Shiteness rating out of 10

ATHLETE - 9/10: really this is the point where post-Coldplay bands just started taking the piss. Also I think they were technically Christian rock.
BABYSHAMBLES - 7/10: Probably the worst live band I have ever seen but they get a couple of points taking off for car crash/amusement value.
BIFFY CLYRO - 7/10: Would probably be higher if I'd had more exposure to their fans and/or been to Reading in 10 years.
FLORENCE AND THE MACHINE - 4/10 - bit too much in the star quality stakes, also a couple of alright songs.
HARD-FI - 6/10 - awful clumsy shit but they get a couple of points knocked off because Hard To Beat was quite a good song, and they weren't the Ordinary Boys.
HUNDRED REASONS - 5/10 - too past-it and lol to be serious contenders here
JOE LEAN AND THE JING JANG JONG - 7/10 - obviously woeful but everybody knew it
KAISER CHIEFS - 10/10 genuine contenders
KASABIAN - 10/10 genuine contenders, also worst fans ever
KEANE - 2/10 basically too inoffensive
MUMFORD & CUNTS - 20/10
NOAH AND THE WHALE - 5/10 - no one can seriously vote for them when Mumford & Sons exist
PIGEON DETECTIVES - 10/10 worst shit ever
RAZORLIGHT - 10/10 also maybe more for Johnny Borrell factor
SCOUTING FOR GIRLS - 11/10 she's so luvverly, she's so luvverly, she's so luvverly, she's so luvverly, she's so luvverly, she's so luvverly, she's so luvverly, she's so luvverly
SNOW PATROL - 9/10 - they get a point knocked off for making DJ Martian so angry
STARSAILOR - 8/10 - obviously terrible but also kind of easy to ignore to matter how big they were
THE COURTEENERS - 6/10 - some Oasis shit, right?
THE CRIBS - 9/10, dude has one of the worst voices ever
THE ENEMY - can't even remember what they sounded like but I'll assume they were terrible so a straight 8/10
THE FEELING - I don't think I've actually knowingly heard one of their songs, 8/10 as I'm not giving them the benefit of the doubt
THE FRATELLIS - 30/10 - Chelsea Dagger might be the worst thing that any of these bands have put out
THE FUTUREHEADS - 5/10 - feel a bit too credible to be here
THE HOOSIERS - 9/10, stupid name
THE KOOKS - 4/10 - hating on the Kooks feels a bit like hating on Keane, kneejerk "girls like this so it must be shit" hate
THE MAGIC NUMBERS - 5/10 - hilarious strop on Top of the Pops gives them a bit of leeway, also everyone's forgotten about them
THE ORDINARY BOYS - 10/10 - surely they were to 'ska' what Mumford & Sons are to 'folk'
THE OTHERS - honestly I have no idea what they sounded like but the sheer lack of ambition indicated by giving yourselves a name with absolutely no connotations whatsoever gets them a straight 10/10
THE RAKES - even Lethal Bizzle is probably embarassed about this lot now 8/10
THE STEREOPHONICS - okay they might actually rival Mumford & Sons 30/10
THE TWANG - 8/10 - fuck knows
THE VIEW - 9/10 - Cast more like
THE WOMBATS - 8/10 but at least they seem funny in retrospect
THE ZUTONS - 10/10 - die.
TOPLOADER - should fit in the Kooks/Keane mould except for the fact that Dancing In The Moonlight is one of the worst records ever made. 10/10

Matt DC, Thursday, 17 February 2011 16:11 (3 years ago) Permalink

i have the biffy clyro album with the woman masturbating on the front. i do not recall the name of the record but the image stuck. the singles off that were v good and i suspect continue to be so.

Roberto Spiralli, Thursday, 17 February 2011 16:12 (3 years ago) Permalink

i fucking hate that dogs die in hot cars album, and i normally love c.langer and winstanley productions.

re the grates .. i have an album in the archive, no idea if album #1 or #3, all i hear is second rate grunge.

also, the long blondes/pipettes should not be on this list.

mark e, Tuesday, 29 July 2014 23:19 (3 months ago) Permalink

note :
my blocking s/w stopped me from seeing most of the list ..
i got about 20 in and then the number left to view went down with each album.
so, i have no idea re the late entries ..

mark e, Tuesday, 29 July 2014 23:21 (3 months ago) Permalink

same here...the Chalets and Pipettes were a lot better than the bands I did see listed

dem bow dem bow need calcium (seandalai), Wednesday, 30 July 2014 00:03 (3 months ago) Permalink

(#13 although these numbers appear to be entirely meaningless)

the opening paragraph says "Here’s our favourite 50", i guess the poor sap writing it fell apart before his stream of consciousness splurge was quite over.

Merdeyeux, Wednesday, 30 July 2014 00:50 (3 months ago) Permalink

Pipettes were good (at least before Rose left). Love her solo album.

uxorious gazumping (monotony), Wednesday, 30 July 2014 01:09 (3 months ago) Permalink

Grates' early stuff was pretty trashy punkpop but the most recent album iirc was more restrained and delicate.

uxorious gazumping (monotony), Wednesday, 30 July 2014 01:10 (3 months ago) Permalink

"Now [The Chalets] make up two thirds of buzzy garage band The September Girls" - have thus learned something mildly interesting from this list, aside from wondering how you have two thirds of a five-piece band

― for sale: Bebe's boots, never worn (DJ Mencap), Tuesday, July 29, 2014 7:17 PM (Yesterday) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

it's just the vocalists. also the album is somewhat disappointing

katherine, Wednesday, 30 July 2014 04:44 (3 months ago) Permalink

every time there's one of these polls of a load of lol landfill acts people pop up to say things like "powder don;t belong on this list" or "symposium's first 2 singles were actually quite good" and I just know without checking that this isn't true

― dat neggy nilmar (wins), Friday, 22 March 2013 19:45 (1 year ago) Bookmark Flag Post Permalink

wins, Wednesday, 30 July 2014 06:13 (3 months ago) Permalink

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

why you gotta be Joe Root? (Daphnis Celesta), Wednesday, 30 July 2014 07:28 (3 months ago) Permalink

I like the September Girls album fwiw

for sale: Bebe's boots, never worn (DJ Mencap), Wednesday, 30 July 2014 08:42 (3 months ago) Permalink

note :
my blocking s/w stopped me from seeing most of the list ..
i got about 20 in and then the number left to view went down with each album.
so, i have no idea re the late entries ..

Oh, I had this too. That was why I thought the numbering was meaningless, it would show me non-consecutive numbers and finally crapped out after about 24.

Now wading through the other half without ad-blocking, and that's a lot of ads.

the ghosts of dead pom-bears (a passing spacecadet), Wednesday, 30 July 2014 08:48 (3 months ago) Permalink

bloody hell .. switched off add blocking ..
that is one seriously painful website to look at.
ok - the rest of the list - truly dreadful (though i still have a soft spot for the clor album).
love how the whole premise of the listicle is that this is supposed to be about decent bands of the era, and yet, in many of the blurbs they slag the band off.
even they cant keep up the pretence.

mark e, Wednesday, 30 July 2014 09:23 (3 months ago) Permalink

I grew up listening to a lot of compilations, and things like "forgotten Nuggets of the 60s" which would be 10 utterly shit tracks, a couple of quite good ones and one so amazing it made the whole rest of the album worthwhile. (And if you were smart, you'd make a C90 of the various amazing ones from other comps.)

So when I see a list of 50 random bands - and especially if I see people I know from other ILX threads, and whose tastes I generally trust, coming along and saying "actually X had this really good single" and "Y doesn't belong on this list!" - especially if I see 3 or 4 people in a row name the same bands. You know, I trust their opinion that that one band might be really really good more than I trust some cynic who can't even bother checking because they have already pre-decided that everything is shit.

So still: Arturo were really good, and Long Blondes really really do not fucking belong on this list.

Branwell with an N, Wednesday, 30 July 2014 09:33 (3 months ago) Permalink

My cynicism is born of hard-won experience of bothering to check things out

wins, Wednesday, 30 July 2014 12:09 (3 months ago) Permalink

Lol ok it isn't really

wins, Wednesday, 30 July 2014 12:10 (3 months ago) Permalink

This was an era/genre of music that I was by-and-large repelled by at the time, but TBF I would probably listen to an ILM-compiled 'best of' this list.

3kDk (dog latin), Thursday, 31 July 2014 09:59 (3 months ago) Permalink

does this signal the first wave of landfill revivalism?

Merdeyeux, Friday, 1 August 2014 00:38 (3 months ago) Permalink

Some excellent bile from Noodle Vague near the start of this thread.

the joke should be over once the kid is eaten. (chap), Saturday, 2 August 2014 17:34 (3 months ago) Permalink

tsk, so much wasted hostility

why you gotta be Joe Root? (Daphnis Celesta), Saturday, 2 August 2014 18:54 (3 months ago) Permalink

that Struts video is...something

why you gotta be Joe Root? (Daphnis Celesta), Saturday, 2 August 2014 18:55 (3 months ago) Permalink

The Struts aren't really landfill indie. They look more like the town dumbos - harmless, energetic, hoovering up the local lassies. I love it. It would be mean to criticise their music. If I could go back again, I would seriously consider doing exactly what they're doing. The difference, then and now, I guess, is that they didn't "seriously consider" anything. I am jealous as hell.

Eyeball Kicks, Saturday, 2 August 2014 22:12 (3 months ago) Permalink

THE SWAGGER are an original 4 piece indie, alternative, Grit-rock band straight out of North London like a Loaded Gun. Originally formed in March 2012, the band are made up of two brothers Lee Stevens (Lead Vocals, Rhythm Guitar) Paul Stevens (Lead Guitar, Backing Vocals) Will O’Connell (Bass Guitar) Roger Malaquias (Drums)

The band released a 4 track demo EP penned “Carnaby’s Treat” back in early January 2013 and has caused a stir gigging around the U.K and have played some very good venues and supported some really great bands along the way. Their songs are very catchy, melodic with a modern punk rock attitude. The band have plans to release their double A-Side Single with 2 videos to follow and are hoping for a release early 2015 and are ready to set the world on fire. “The band are tipped for success”

Sounds Like: The Jam, Oasis, The Who, The Kinks, The Beatles

http://www.facebook.com/theswaggerofficial

Little Saint Hugh of Lincoln (nakhchivan), Wednesday, 6 August 2014 21:33 (3 months ago) Permalink

Roger Malaquias (Drums) sounds rather incongruous

john wahey (NickB), Wednesday, 6 August 2014 21:40 (3 months ago) Permalink

“The band are tipped for success” [citation needed]

dem bow dem bow need calcium (seandalai), Wednesday, 6 August 2014 21:42 (3 months ago) Permalink

xp classic landfill flourish imo, even stereophonics had their exotic spanish drummer

Merdeyeux, Wednesday, 6 August 2014 21:44 (3 months ago) Permalink

Grit-rock band straight out of North London like a Loaded Gun..... modern punk rock attitude. Carnaby’s Treat gedditt! I want to play submissive twister with these guys.

autumn reckoning faction (xelab), Wednesday, 6 August 2014 21:44 (3 months ago) Permalink

now that i've clicked the photo link i admit that is not what i expected

Merdeyeux, Wednesday, 6 August 2014 21:46 (3 months ago) Permalink

this photo from the facebook page is pretty cute:

soref, Wednesday, 6 August 2014 21:49 (3 months ago) Permalink

ok, I really like their song 'Carnaby Street' from their soundcloud page, it sounds a bit like Television Personalities

soref, Wednesday, 6 August 2014 22:00 (3 months ago) Permalink

The song Carnaby Street sounds nothing like Television Personalities and is kind of awful but I don't think this thread should be used for mocking well-meaning blokes just doing what they do in front of some kids, much as student newspaper stuff doesn't fit in the Worst Music Writing thread.

Eyeball Kicks, Wednesday, 6 August 2014 22:28 (3 months ago) Permalink

Not even when they're called The Swagger.

everything, Wednesday, 6 August 2014 22:35 (3 months ago) Permalink

Hmm I don't mind, I'm a very mean person, and yeah "The Swagger" is asking for it... but I know so many sad old people like this. I feel so soft.

Eyeball Kicks, Wednesday, 6 August 2014 22:38 (3 months ago) Permalink

bands least entitled to their name

Adding ease. Adding wonder. Adding (contenderizer), Wednesday, 6 August 2014 22:41 (3 months ago) Permalink

but this would have made a much better guilty pleasures thread

Adding ease. Adding wonder. Adding (contenderizer), Wednesday, 6 August 2014 22:42 (3 months ago) Permalink

1 month passes...

The modern godfathers of this are probably Biffy Clyro, the Scottish trio who've sold over a million albums and 400,000 UK singles to a fanbase that has remained staunchly loyal to them and their anthemic, post-hardcore Simple Minds sound. Having formed in 1995, they seem to have existed at the fringes of British popular music for as long as I can remember, yet their fans seem to comprise a strange, silent majority. Much like film critic Pauline Kael, who was ridiculed for the metropolitan ignorance of her (widely misquoted) statement: "I can't believe Nixon won. I've never met anyone who voted for him," I've never knowingly met any Biffy Clyro fans, but that doesn't mean they aren't out there.

http://www.vice.com/en_uk/read/understanding-the-phenomenon-of-royal-blood

Nothing less than the Spirit of the Age (nakhchivan), Monday, 8 September 2014 19:51 (2 months ago) Permalink

I've met them, they're my kids

Dr X O'Skeleton, Monday, 8 September 2014 19:55 (2 months ago) Permalink

http://www.nme.com/news/the-enemy/79681

PaulTMA, Wednesday, 10 September 2014 12:25 (2 months ago) Permalink

"Clarke's Twitter rant has already garnered support from fellow indie musician Matt Bowman from The Pigeon Detectives. He sent Clarke a message stating: "If I add all my pounds to your pounds for every time they mention my curly hair in a negative tone.. we could buy a tank!"

PaulTMA, Wednesday, 10 September 2014 12:26 (2 months ago) Permalink

http://www.twitlonger.com/show/n_1s9g38b

Thing is, though I've got no interest whatsoever in this guy's band, I agree with him. And there is often a complete lack of professional respect between people ostensibly in the same industry (and of professionalism generally, from both musicians and journalists and industry people, etc etc, probably because of the mythos around the industry and 'talent' in general).

Hey Bob (Scik Mouthy), Thursday, 11 September 2014 15:18 (2 months ago) Permalink

Yeah, I read that and it did give me pause. (Especially given I've just been really mean about one musician's appearance on ILM already today, ha.)

Like, coming in for knocks and scrutiny of your appearance does just seem to be part and parcel of being a person that gets up on stage before others. But there is a line over which it stops being just knocks and starts being bullying. (Though magically that line appears to be in different places depending on a persons gender or race!)

The underlying issue he touches on, though, is the general meanness and football-match competitive nastiness that the British music press in specific encourages and thrives on. The old Build 'Em Up Knock 'Em Down school. Which... y'know, they do forget that these are human beings under it. And one does get the sense that musicians are just thrown out there and told to get on with it, with no actual thought as to psychological protection, or how people get damaged.

I mean, there's no one who's not been in the music industry for more than 20 seconds who hasn't been told DO NOT READ YOUR PRESS. But social media and twitter and the like means that you really don't have to read your press in order for the vicious parts of it to come to you.

Shugazi (Branwell with an N), Thursday, 11 September 2014 15:25 (2 months ago) Permalink

There's not really any sense that musicians are 'employees' of record labels, as a punter. How do contracts work? Is there any analogue between being signed to a label and working full time for a.n.other company in a professional capacity? Or is it more like freelancing? I guess even if there was, that doesn't cover loads of musicians self-releasing, etc, or give them any protection from the press, fans, etc etc.

It's a weird territory, not one I've particularly considered before. I guess I manage people now at work, and Em does too, so we've started talking about HR type things, and the music industry, once again, just seems fucking insane.

Hey Bob (Scik Mouthy), Thursday, 11 September 2014 15:31 (2 months ago) Permalink

Depends on the label, depends on the contract, it really runs the gamut.

Some people I've known who work for labels, the A&R people used to end up literally becoming babysitters for incredibly damaged artists. But in the reshaping of the music industry, seems like those are the people whose jobs have gone first. And there's always this nebulous ambiguity as to whether people from a record label are actually on an artist's "side" or just trying to sell a product.

Seems it's more the job of a manager (or the much derided role of PR or publicist) whose job it is to protect musicians from shit like this. But I think mostly, there's just an idea that you have to be tough-skinned to survive, and if you're not tough-skinned, you're not really cut out for the role.

(I mean, it's always a dance with artists, that tension of being sensitive enough to produce good art, and yet tough-skinned enough to not care about critics.)

Shugazi (Branwell with an N), Thursday, 11 September 2014 15:35 (2 months ago) Permalink

It's not going to stop being mean about Paul Banks, though. ;-)

Shugazi (Branwell with an N), Thursday, 11 September 2014 15:39 (2 months ago) Permalink

Can't believe he had to google 'orc'

ogmor, Thursday, 11 September 2014 18:44 (2 months ago) Permalink

The fuck is a Hobbit jar?

kinder, Thursday, 11 September 2014 19:53 (2 months ago) Permalink

Out of all the shit bands, I've always found something appealing in The Enemy (see this thread, in which to my eternal shame I described them as "repulsive midgets in tracksuits" but this was seven years ago so forgive me Tom). This is a nicely written response to the haters. It's got that calm Primo Levi righteousness about it.

Eyeball Kicks, Thursday, 11 September 2014 22:23 (2 months ago) Permalink

speaking as a not-tall person, am interested in how tall he actually is I will say that. a brief google has a wholly unverifiable source listing him as 5'9" which iirc is the precise average height of an adult UK male

for sale: Bebe's boots, never worn (DJ Mencap), Thursday, 11 September 2014 22:28 (2 months ago) Permalink

The Enemy thing I just linked to is interesting to me cos I have a song with the lyrics "You're not a rebel, you're a whore" (terrible I know!) and it is amazing to me that it came from mishearing The Enemy!

Eyeball Kicks, Thursday, 11 September 2014 22:31 (2 months ago) Permalink


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