MEN:SHOW US YOUR WIENERS

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*insert King Missile song here*

― donut bitch (donut), Wednesday, 10 March 2004 23:25 (twenty years ago) link

No, but seriously - there must be hiphop tracks describing wangs, right?

if Schoolly D's "Mr. Big Dick" wasn't obvious enough...

― donut bitch (donut), Wednesday, 10 March 2004 23:26 (twenty years ago) link

http://www.findagrave.com/meatpage/libbysvienna.jpg

― andy, Wednesday, 10 March 2004 23:27 (twenty years ago) link

If there weren't reason enough to boycott Nestlé already..

― N. (nickdastoor), Wednesday, 10 March 2004 23:28 (twenty years ago) link

my dad took the skin from my brother's and my circumsision and made wallets out of them

― JaXoN (JasonD), Wednesday, 10 March 2004 23:37 (twenty years ago) link

when you rub them they turn into suitcases

― JaXoN (JasonD), Wednesday, 10 March 2004 23:37 (twenty years ago) link

I think I heard that as a Jewish joke at school.

― N. (nickdastoor), Wednesday, 10 March 2004 23:38 (twenty years ago) link

I ponder this thread.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Wednesday, 10 March 2004 23:57 (twenty years ago) link

I ponder all the tit-talk that's gone before and then wonder why the hell no one sez shit on this one. or do I actually?

― Matos W.K. (M Matos), Thursday, 11 March 2004 00:05 (twenty years ago) link

what do you mean "shit"?

I liked yr honest answer matos. people should be so squeamish about their bodies.

― Ask For Janice (thatgirl), Thursday, 11 March 2004 00:07 (twenty years ago) link

"penises look funny", therefore jokes dominate moreso than critical phallic discussion.

― donut bitch (donut), Thursday, 11 March 2004 00:09 (twenty years ago) link

(sigh, I miss anthony.. we really need a thread on the phallus: the art and criticisms thereof)

― donut bitch (donut), Thursday, 11 March 2004 00:11 (twenty years ago) link

Keep your threads away from my phalllus.

― N. (nickdastoor), Thursday, 11 March 2004 00:13 (twenty years ago) link

My answer was both entirely serious and entirely honest.

― Colin Meeder (Mert), Thursday, 11 March 2004 00:13 (twenty years ago) link

It was sweet. I love hearing about disembodied wieners.

― N. (nickdastoor), Thursday, 11 March 2004 00:15 (twenty years ago) link

I was being petulant, sorry. But there is this weird thing where if a guy talks about his cock he's seen to be (or maybe more to the point AFRAID of seeming to be) bragging about it or something. Or just being pervy. Whereas women talk about their boobs all the time. I suppose it's not really analagous, though, the way there would be if there were more straight-up vag talk.

― Matos W.K. (M Matos), Thursday, 11 March 2004 00:25 (twenty years ago) link

Vag Talk, with your host: Barbara Walters

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 11 March 2004 00:27 (twenty years ago) link

Can we talk about treasure trails and man nipples and make a compromise?

― donut bitch (donut), Thursday, 11 March 2004 00:28 (twenty years ago) link

― cinniblount (James Blount), Thursday, 11 March 2004 00:31 (twenty years ago) link

I keep on adding "if you love hip hop" to the thread title.

blount I thought just porn stars did the band-around-the-sack thing

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 11 March 2004 00:33 (twenty years ago) link

seriously though, if anyone really wants to see mine, just send an email to d o n u t b i z i t c h (at) h o t m a i l (dot) c o m and i'll send a pic back. don't care if you're anonymous or not. it's just a dick.

― donut bitch (donut), Thursday, 11 March 2004 00:34 (twenty years ago) link

(keep in mind i'm getting my wisdom teeth out tomorrow morning, so i may not get to the, haha, "mounds" of requests right away)

― donut bitch (donut), Thursday, 11 March 2004 00:35 (twenty years ago) link

Almond Joy's got nuts--Mounds don't

― Matos W.K. (M Matos), Thursday, 11 March 2004 00:37 (twenty years ago) link

let show you baby i'm a talented boy

― cinniblount (James Blount), Thursday, 11 March 2004 00:38 (twenty years ago) link

my dick smells like cinnamon and if you suck on it long enough there's gold inside - come here i'll show you!

― cinniblount (James Blount), Thursday, 11 March 2004 00:39 (twenty years ago) link

i once wrote a paper on the penis in contempary art, i used lots of freud.

― anthony, Thursday, 11 March 2004 00:43 (twenty years ago) link

ipsofacto's penis sculpture to thread!

― teeny (teeny), Thursday, 11 March 2004 00:45 (twenty years ago) link

C'mon folks, if you all don't start posting pics of your dicks, how will I be able to photoshop them into a bag? There's the bigger picture to think of here.

― Sean Carruthers (SeanC), Thursday, 11 March 2004 00:49 (twenty years ago) link

ouch.

― andy, Thursday, 11 March 2004 00:56 (twenty years ago) link

honestly, I'm still trying to figure out how to describe mine, and whether or not that gets me off the hook for the breasts thread.

― Begs2Differ (Begs2Differ), Thursday, 11 March 2004 01:14 (twenty years ago) link

"your fireman is very magical;
if you rub his helmet, he spits in your eye."

― Kingfish Cowboy (Kingfish), Thursday, 11 March 2004 01:15 (twenty years ago) link

Where I come from, length, circumference, circumcision status, and any notable landmarks is the proper way to describe one's penis.

― Casuistry (Chris P), Thursday, 11 March 2004 01:16 (twenty years ago) link

To quote my friend Laura who yelled it out a car window on a roadtrip while passing several construction workers: SHOW US YOUR DICKS!

― luna (luna.c), Thursday, 11 March 2004 01:16 (twenty years ago) link

Did they?

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 11 March 2004 01:17 (twenty years ago) link

how about this: ringed, wrinkly, medium-sized, friendly, underemployed.

― Begs2Differ (Begs2Differ), Thursday, 11 March 2004 01:17 (twenty years ago) link

holy shit did I just describe RUE MCCLANAHAN?

― Begs2Differ (Begs2Differ), Thursday, 11 March 2004 01:17 (twenty years ago) link

I don't know, I was driving!

― luna (luna.c), Thursday, 11 March 2004 01:17 (twenty years ago) link

Yes you did.

― luna (luna.c), Thursday, 11 March 2004 01:18 (twenty years ago) link

that was a pretty good x-post luna

― Begs2Differ (Begs2Differ), Thursday, 11 March 2004 01:18 (twenty years ago) link

I didn't really have a great need to describe myself, but I felt it would help expiate all my bad karma on ILX from today. I feel clean now.

Funny how making everyone else feel sick does that for me.

― Begs2Differ (Begs2Differ), Thursday, 11 March 2004 01:19 (twenty years ago) link

if you want to see mine you can email your mom for the pics

― oops (Oops), Thursday, 11 March 2004 01:19 (twenty years ago) link

Yeah I thought it was too, sug. Wondertwin powers...

― luna (luna.c), Thursday, 11 March 2004 01:20 (twenty years ago) link

ACTIVATE!

form of...oh never mind

― Begs2Differ (Begs2Differ), Thursday, 11 March 2004 01:21 (twenty years ago) link

(I couldn't think of anything good)

(Well, I could, but I let it go)

(Well I didn't, but I'm out of batteries)

― luna (luna.c), Thursday, 11 March 2004 01:21 (twenty years ago) link

I keep reading:

holy shit did I just describe RUE MCCLANAHAN?

I don't know, I was driving!

because I really, really want to see the movie that clips that exchange for the trailer.

― Tep (ktepi), Thursday, 11 March 2004 01:22 (twenty years ago) link

I like the idea the twins can't decide on something and they just become random lumps of coagulated matter.

― Ned Raggett (Ned), Thursday, 11 March 2004 01:22 (twenty years ago) link

Sorry for saying "clip" and "exchange" and "Rue McClanahan" on a wiener thread.

― Tep (ktepi), Thursday, 11 March 2004 01:22 (twenty years ago) link

I'm NOT sorry for totally breaking this thread. Nick and Matos both actually described their wieners, but it was mine that ended everything. Thank you, and good night.

― Begs2Differ (Begs2Differ), Thursday, 11 March 2004 01:33 (twenty years ago) link

would it be too crass and derivative to start a WOMEN:SHOW US YOUR PUSSIES thread?

― Eisbär (llamasfur), Thursday, 11 March 2004 03:10 (twenty years ago) link

Yes.

― El Diablo Robotico (Nicole), Thursday, 11 March 2004 03:12 (twenty years ago) link

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