Favorite lines from Seinfeld?

JERRY: George Peppard has been dead for years.

GEORGE: Well, whoever he was, he knew a lot about The A-Team.

GEORGE: What are you gunna say to her?
JERRY: Ur, 'hello'?
GEORGE: You're not going across THE LINE with 'hello'!!!!

1. interpersonal relationships are too good to be a game so let's reduce it to one
2. every episode always resets the characters: if they have something at the start it will be gone by the end, sure they'll have learned but they always seem to lose
3. the deliveries
4. he knows the stand-up bits are rubbish - ts: reading an essay & comment about the painful idiosyncrasy of unrequited love vs Spike-Buffy acting it out for you, hullo?! Hm?
5. so funny, so so funny
6. &c. or "I have run out of things to say right now, really, so I should stop 'saying', full stop".

sung along to a synth pop jingle type background:

"believe it or not George isn't at home
please leave a messaaaaage at the beep
i cant be here or id pick up the phone
where could i beeeee.......?

pah pah pah

Believe it or not - im not ho-o-o-ome!"

Its a parody of the song "Walking on Air", which I wouldn't ever describe as synthpop.

The deal with the stand-up bits is that the show debutted during the early 90s standup fad, and the gimmick was the "its part stand up comedy, part sit-com!" They gradually phased out the standup bits, and with good cause.

That chimp's all right.

ESTELLE: I feel a draft. Let's change tables.
FRANK: Get outta here! We have a booth.
ESTELLE: Frank, I'm cold!
FRANK: Order a hot dish.

Woman - "What's ironic?"

Elaine - "This. That we've come all this way, we made all this progress, but, you know, we lost the little things, the niceties."

Woman - "No, I mean, what does `ironic' mean?

Jerry: We're four months apart!

George: Nevertheless.

(possibly botched from memory)

"I've always wanted to pretend to be an architect."

"I'm sorry but I'm not at home,
Please leave a message, after the tone,
I'm not here or I'd answer the phone,
Where could I beeeee???"

Absolutely my favourite bit ever. Or at least in the top 10.

Jerry: So were going to make the Post Office pay for my new stereo?

Kramer: It's just a writeoff for them.

Jerry: How is it a writeoff?

Kramer: They just write it off.

Jerry: Write it off what?

Kramer: Jerry, all these big companies, they write off everything.

Jerry: You don't even know what a writeoff is.

Kramer: Do you?

Jerry: No. I don't.

Kramer: But they do, and they are the ones writing it off.

(Kramer leaves.)

Jerry: I wish I just had the last twenty seconds of my life back.

-You look taller
-Timberlands

George: "You can stick your 'sorry's in a sock!"

__

Elaine: "Don't worry, Jerry, it's in the vault."

Jerry: "No good. Too many people know the combination." (makes alcohol swigging motion)

__

Kramer with the lollypop getting bigger throughout the episode, too, was a nice touch. "FDR wants me dead."

"Well, it's my job and I'm pretty damn serious about it. In addition to being a postmaster, I'm also a general. And we both know, it's the job of a general to, by God, get things done. So maybe you can understand why I get a little irritated when someone calls me away from my golf."

This is just plain wrong. I recently watched the whole series from start to finish over a period of two weeks and there is definite, if subtle, character development.

woman on subway: "really?"

george: "well, they hurt him bad. really... hurt his feelings".

*****************

kramer: "i mean, isn't there like statue of limitations on that?

jerry: "statute."

kramer: "what?"

jerry: "statute of limitations. It's not a statue."

kramer: "no, it's statue."

jerry: "fine, it's a sculpture of limitations."

kramer: "just wait a minute...elaine, elaine! now you're smart, is it statue or statute of limitations?"

elaine: "statuTE."

kramer: "oh, I really think you're wrong."