thread to get over a breakup

curious about the hearsay tbh

tbhq

Breaking up is rarely easy. Unless it's amicable, there is generally a feeling of devastation on one side, while the initiating party feels relief. It's undeniable that break-ups suck, but there are ways to make them more bearable. Keep reading to get your heart healing.

* Leave your pity party early.

That's right. It's your party, but that's enough crying. Time to call it a night. Put away the photo albums, stash the Ben & Jerry's back in the freezer, and shut off those sappy 80s love ballads (this is actually for everyone's benefit.) These are necessary steps to take in moving on. No one is going to want to date someone who has pictures of their ex, covered in tears and melted ice cream, scattered across their bed.

* Don't be a stalker.

It's easy to keep track of what your ex is doing in this age of technology. However, desperate text messages after a night of drinking aren't going to make you seem desirable, just pathetic. In fact, the iPhone even has an application just for you drunk dialers that will block someone's number for a certain amount of time, so use it to your benefit if you can't keep your fingers on good behavoir. Oh yeah, and get off their Facebook. Knowing what they did over the weekend isn't as gratifying when you have to creep through their pictures to figure it out.

* Work on moving on.

Breaking up doesn't have to be such a negative situation. Instead, focus on the positive. You can try something new your partner wasn't into, such as yoga, or even a different type of cuisine. Do your best to find out who you are without your previous "other half." Maybe he or she didn't like the club scene, so go out dancing with some friends, and look smoking hot doing it. Treat yourself to a makeover and emerge on the dating scene as a newly single twentysomething on the prowl. Rawr!

haha ^^^ i just now sent the guy i started this thread about an email to gloat that i got a voice message from bill steer

chump

(i meant him, but it can just as easily apply to me now)

i misread that as you sent the guy you started this thread about a copy of this thread ...

today's music listening reminds me that I missed the ghostface/raekwon set at a music festival because she was getting heat stroke from drinking too much beer and sleeping in the sun on a humid-ass day

so it goes

most recent breakup here ^^^ just texted me and called me a cunt

o_O O_o

aw fuck that nonsense.

yeah, now i can really dig in here.

amazingly selfish, self-centered, immature, cowardly and dramatic. you solipsistic little pussy. make least effort demand most credit type of guy. 99% of your friends are realllllllly dumb. you said something like "i became obsessed with the freak-folk movement" and i was so embarassed for you i wanted to fall through the floor. you want a medal for listening to, like, 2 rap artists (kanye and weezy, hahahaha). your music sucks and you sing like conor oberst, i encouraged and tried to help you anyway because i loved and cared about you. any time you had my back it was just to show off that you had my back, not because you gave a fuck about anything. you talked and talked and talked and talked and never listened. why listen or inquire when you (wrongly) presume to already have the other person's number on everything? you actually once argued that it is ok to yell "slut" at stranger girls in a bar if they are "dressed slutty," hahaha good luck in your women's studies classes, prick. you think it is a fresh bold and exciting stance to be skeptical of pitchforkmedia. YOU THOUGHT I WAS CHEATING ON YOU WITH YOUR GAY BEST FRIEND. "im not liberal or conservative," ugh.

above all, you called me a "cunt" in a text message?!

"im a pretty misogynistic guy, and i've NEVER done that." - a pal

sayonara, flatlander

http://randazza.files.wordpress.com/2009/02/middle-finger.jpg

ur not gonna fit all that into 1 text, just sayin

i fit it into a phone call

feelin pretty good tbh

<3 all power to your arm roxy...if there's one question tho it's how do you end up with all these jerkstores in the first place??

(LJ making a smooooth move imo)

hahaha nay it is genuine curiosity, maybe there is something about a dude soulfully gettin into his own choons which can tweak the heart of any lady

roxy, the last thing you need right now is to be alone. i'm coming over.

I never understood folks who text/email/whatever this sort of nasty bullshit after a breakup... What do they get from it, does it make them feel a better person somehow? After you broke up it's time to pick up the pieces and move on, not dwell on some pointless anger towards the other person. Sending text messages like this only proves the other person was right in breaking up with you.

i'd only send the message to an ex's new partner, tbh.

I mean, I can kinda understand it (even if I don't think it's right) if the other person would have done some fucked-up shit to cause the breakup, but clearly that's not the case here.

(x-post)

It's just a way of venting anger, really. Plus in 9/10 of cases, drink n dial is the culprit.

photographic memory for numbers doesn't help. you can't even delete the entry on your phone.

Haha, whenever I've drunk dialed/texted exes, it's just been a pathetic attempt to get some warmth and sex. Maybe I've been lucky though, all my breakups have been pretty clean and civilized. Of course there's been tears and drama like that, but never anything nasty or mean from either party.

you're not doing it right

was gonna say.

tbh it's been almost a month and everything was fine and friendly until today/tihs morning

ive had lots of nice BFs too -- they arent really the kind you post about in a thread like this imo

also, you only post about bad things in this thread, so, grain of salt

Well, as none of my partners has ever done something awful enough to me to cause such a reaction, and as far as I know I haven't done that sort of thing to anyone either. At least no one has ever sent me a text message like that. Am I missing something? A couple exes have cut all contact with me, but that's perfectly understandable.

(xx-post)

i think some of them logged on to SB you that time tuomas :(

for example no one ive ever dated has ever complimented my looks/told me i was beautiful as much as this guy, he took care of me when i was sick, sleeping beside him was amazingly comfortable, he played with my cat in a really cute way, he shared my affection for the smoky mountains, sex was awesome, and even when his taste was questionable or teenagery he without question loved music passionately and his verve for it was very pretty infectious. that's not the type of stuff that typically makes the thread, but im putting it here in the interest of fairness and trust me it took all my scientific integrity

he sounds like a keeper, tbh. call him.

and like i said, he's basically a child. he'll improve. this is just a THREAD TO GET OVER A BREAKUP

xpost haha already called tbh but it was not that kinda call imo there will be no more calls

yeah i figured your character assassination focused on certain incidents rather than the whole...you certainly have a way of knocking 'em though! guess most accusations of deep-seated flaws are to be taken as a hint rather than an outright denouncement xxxxp

yeah, well put like that everything falls into perspective...i wonder if a companion thread 'say something nice about an ex' could be started... xxp

but he does sound slightly immature. a lot of these flaws/plus points remind me of myself a year or so back

Speaking of positive things, I just saw my most recent ex after a long break, and it was really nice, I think we may become friends again. So in the end we got over the breakup better than I thought.

but he does sound slightly immature. a lot of these flaws/plus points remind me of myself a year or so back

lj you need to write a book, ur game is A++ dawg

srsly

(i.e. being a bit solipsistic, showy, not always listening, complimenting on looks all the time, being all OMG about music...after my break-up at the start of this year, things have been reevaluated xp)

he is immature. he is 22 years old.

:-/

just sayin', there are faint echoes of the fallout from when i dated an older lady last year

an older lady huh!!!!

>:|

you sound like you mean elderly lady

well she was 25, i was 21...not much in it i guess...age ought to be irrelevant but i am trying to make my relative immaturity more explicable

i was gonna say "hey 22's plenty mature" but then i remembered i'm not 22 in 28 when the fuck did that happen ;__;

anyway here is something else about this guy. he did not enjoy cute things!!!! he hated cute things. i remember watching some cat video or another and him acting SOOOOO put out by it. i know now unequivocally i can never date another person who is too concerned with his keeping up his antifaggotish or otherwise masculine exterior to say "aw" over a cat eating sushi. fuck that kind of LIFE, imo. i remember once he was annoyed that someone had posted "<3" on my favebook page like that was just the uncoolest thing ever, in fact this person was grady. haw.

Roxy has one of those knockoff social networking pages that over 50s accidentally get sucked into.

i was readin through this tryin to figure out what this guy's deal was and then you posted that he's 22 and i got it.

yeah, tbh. dude's 22 and in a band.

<3 rox