thread to get over a breakup

The pirate a cappella thing embarrasses me still. I mean it's a combination of two oppressively annoying whimsical things.

it's like a perfect storm of student kook...done by AMERICANS

a cappella groups are the bane of the Ivy League ...

my ex found out about ilxor while we were together (by checking her computer history), didn't tell me, and used the fact I'd posted WDYLLs of us together without consulting her as ammunition for my character assassination

― You are Rebels! You are all yankees (country matters), Thursday, August 20, 2009 5:10 PM (2 hours ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

loooooooooooooooool

deej - you're late to the lol here.

btw hoos' ex if you are reading this there are salutations buried amid the hidden messages

are we supposed to be encouraging or discouraging hoos' ex from reading?

i think it is too late for that; we can but soften the blow. hoos' ex you are warmly welcomed to 'thread to get over a breakup'

if she chooses to reopen the thread by now she is probably loling heartily so

well, I've got about 90% of my stuff out of the condo, minus my furniture. looks like this breakup is actually going through.... can't believe I'm actually doing it

:(

moving the stuff out is the easy part ...

i can't remember a single thing about moving out after my last breakup. following month was like a total shellshock, can't remember fuck all of it.

wouldn't mind, i wasn't even drunk tbh

I'm probably going to take another week or so to get picking up the rest scheduled... then there's the fact that she's on my health insurance (as domestic partner), since she has been pretty much jobless since she went on medical leave for mental issues in April. So I still feel like the asshole who's walking out on an ill person, which she had to bring up in the 'official breakup session' we had last Friday. But, as my friends and family keep telling me, there's only so much you can do.

maybe I actually need a "thread to complete a breakup" for a while, since I can't actually get over this until all the connections are severed, right?

You can, but it takes longer and requires more mental trauma on your part.

you're not over someone until you don't hate them any more.

if you don't hate them yet: wait

We're here to listen, man. <3

Called my ex to tell her that she hurt me deeply and she apologized. I accepted that and feel better. It is definitely in my best interest to maintain a cordial relationship with this woman because we work in the same building (separated by three floors, but still). Not going to lunch with her anytime soon, still.

Hah, I've already hit an amazing spectrum of emotions in the last few weeks, from frustration to grief to anger and beyond.

fyi, since I only mentioned it briefly elsewhere, this is the girl I have been with almost two years, live with, got engaged to early July (amazingly bad timing and poor decision in retrospect) because I'd decided things were getting much better than they had been, and maybe she was right that it'd make the atmosphere of things better if we knew where things were heading.

Then she pretty much went on vacation, told me I didn't need to mail her her antidepressant when I found it back at home, flipped out right before coming back because she got drunk and kissed some guy while out, after having been off her medication for six days, and then tried to kill herself in front of me in the living room when I woke up late the night she got back.

good times, I tell you what

Jesus that sounds awful. :-(

oh yeah, and my huge year-long project at work goes live in a week. I am so very thankful for great friends and family right now.

"Grief Anger and Beyond" is the worst place I have ever shopped for home accessories, by far.

Anyway, the lesson here is to stay on your meds, kids. Nothing but empathy for you now, mh.

Okay, tell me if there is a shred of truth in this theory/observation:

I ran into a friend of mine at a show the other night, who had broken up with his girlfriend of 10+ years a few months ago. He was now sporting a relatively scraggly beard, while when they were together, he was generally clean-shaven. I'm thinking that with a number of guys, the sloppy beard is a stage in the post-break-up process. It seems to come at some point when the guy has accepted his singleness and is trying to make the best of it, and isn't quite ready to be in another serious relationship.

There may be something to that, but in all probability it's because shaving your face is totally inconvenient.

yeah, rather than being a 'post break up phase', scraggliness is more of a 'i'm glad i don't need to do this any more' thing.

well, in the theory of it being a post break up phase it would begin in the "depression" stage and continue into "acceptance"

I thought scraggly beards were the in thing this year? Maybe he was just looking to hook up with indie hipster girls?

it would begin in the "depression" stage and continue into "acceptance"

yeah, acceptance that mach 3 blades cost a fucking bomb

lool. i grew my beard in the wake of an unpleasant breakup and never bothered shaving it off again

thing is, on most guys the unkempt beard is just not a good look.

i carry it beautifully, tbh. hides three of my chins, and most of my pimples

in fact i only shave to drive unwelcome girlfriends away

Scraggly beard = TEH CUTE

http://farm1.static.flickr.com/31/59740272_23e1fad288_o.jpg

but I fully admit that might be an indie hipster

i stopped shaving after i broke up w/ my girl, and then we got back together, but i didnt start shaving again

nice.

that put her in her place. kinda like a permanent facial yellow card for her.

i kept it because she said she liked it

hey, i'm in fashion?

losin faith in you max.

i've had a beard for like 6 years and every girl i've dated approved of it.

well, obviously?

:)

lol yes i see yr point but it's not like i was going to get rid of it for someone who didn't approve--would have just assumed we were not compatible.

rare to see such commitment to a facial hair arrangement, i commend you tbh

I once shaved off my facial hair following a breakup and stayed clean-shaven for a number of months, but that was mostly because I needed some change.

i have always said that if i hit rock bottom i am going with a mustache

that's what i normally assume about any dude i see with a moustache, tbh