vadge horror stories

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what's the big mystery, guys use Lysol on their bits as well.

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 18 June 2004 17:39 (nineteen years ago) link

does your roomie douche her ass?

― Jon Williams!!!!! (ROFFLE!@!@!@) (ex machina), Friday, 18 June 2004 17:39 (nineteen years ago) link

yes but with paint thinner

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 18 June 2004 17:42 (nineteen years ago) link

http://www.pennsylvaniamaplesyrup.com/pancakes.jpg

― Jon Williams!!!!! (ROFFLE!@!@!@) (ex machina), Friday, 18 June 2004 17:43 (nineteen years ago) link

yesterday my girlfriend shaved as a 'present' for me so we got intimate; i got her to bend over and as i licked her arse, a really long, soft hiss that quickly turned into a kind of sloppy ripping noise shot forth towards my bottom lip and she started pissing herself laughing.

― scg, Friday, 18 June 2004 17:49 (nineteen years ago) link

what

the

fuck

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 18 June 2004 17:51 (nineteen years ago) link

also i think she has this weird hole in her clitoris, i'm pretty sure it's not a piercing though.

― scg, Friday, 18 June 2004 17:52 (nineteen years ago) link

arghhhh

― Jon Williams!!!!! (ROFFLE!@!@!@) (ex machina), Friday, 18 June 2004 17:54 (nineteen years ago) link

scg wins

― chrisco (chrisco), Friday, 18 June 2004 17:55 (nineteen years ago) link

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Friday, 18 June 2004 17:55 (nineteen years ago) link

"pretty sure"

― martin m. (mushrush), Friday, 18 June 2004 17:56 (nineteen years ago) link

You might not want to go down on a girl who farts and pisses on you without permission.

― Gear! (Gear!), Friday, 18 June 2004 17:57 (nineteen years ago) link

They're not even sure it IS a baby!

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 18 June 2004 17:57 (nineteen years ago) link

I wonder if I can douche my brane with lysol?

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 18 June 2004 17:57 (nineteen years ago) link

oh no no no

― Jon Williams!!!!! (ROFFLE!@!@!@) (ex machina), Friday, 18 June 2004 17:58 (nineteen years ago) link

If your stuff is stinky
Remember gal
A can of Lysol
Is your pal
BURMA SHAVE!

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 18 June 2004 17:59 (nineteen years ago) link

http://www.base58.com/ilx/vag.gif

haha. steve. that's hillarious. it's been one of my favorite fonts lately

― JaXoN (JasonD), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:02 (nineteen years ago) link

(An actual Burma Shave slogan:

If your peach
Keeps out
Of reach
Better practice
What we preach
BURMA SHAVE!

Which I'm pretty sure is related to the matter at hand.)

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:02 (nineteen years ago) link

NO NO NO NO NO

Tep, don't even kid.

― David R. (popshots75`), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:03 (nineteen years ago) link

I shudder to think what could be done w/ Old Spice.

― David R. (popshots75`), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:03 (nineteen years ago) link

On the one hand, I am happy that threads like this distract me from fuming on threads like the moderation thread and the Avril thread. OTOH, YIKES YIKES OH NO.

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:03 (nineteen years ago) link

HHAHA EDDIE MURPHY TO THREAD

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:04 (nineteen years ago) link

Please to draw diagram to explain Eddie Murphy vadge connection.

― David R. (popshots75`), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:05 (nineteen years ago) link

I heard it praised
By drugstore clerks
I tried the stuff
Hot dog!
It works
Lysol Douche

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:05 (nineteen years ago) link

If you're stuck
with dirty gash,
never fear -
give us a splash!
LYSOL DOUCHE!

― David R. (popshots75`), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:08 (nineteen years ago) link

Pine Sol makes you
Taste like trees
This will have him
On his knees
LYSOL DOUCHE!

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:09 (nineteen years ago) link

Eddie Murphy does a routine about putting Old Spice on his dick and the subsequent trauma (culminating in his mother catching him with his dick in the sink and his grandmother telling him he's nasty).

― VengaDan Perry (Dan Perry), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:11 (nineteen years ago) link

Man's complaining?
Get a clue!
Soap and water
just won't do.
LYSOL DOUCHE!

― David R. (popshots75`), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:12 (nineteen years ago) link

(Another one taken from Burma Shave):

It has a tingle
And a tang
That starts the day off
With a bang
LYSOL DOUCHE!

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:19 (nineteen years ago) link

Inky binky
parlez-vous;
Europeans stink,
and so do you!
LYSOL DOUCHE!

(This is what happens when I'm left unsupervised @ work.)

― David R. (popshots75`), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:23 (nineteen years ago) link

I'm about to pee my pants.

― luna (luna.c), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:39 (nineteen years ago) link

June thought Ward
Was gonna leave her
She gave him
A cleaner Beaver
LYSOL DOUCHE!

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:40 (nineteen years ago) link

best everrr4t omg

― Jon Williams!!!!! (ROFFLE!@!@!@) (ex machina), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:43 (nineteen years ago) link

(I feel about twelve years old, sitting in the back of the bus with my George Michael tape in my RCA Walkman knockoff and dogearing volume 5 of Truly Tasteless Jokes.)

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:43 (nineteen years ago) link

(And I feel like I just I lost the spear to my Klaatu action figure between the bus seat cushions.)

― David R. (popshots75`), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:48 (nineteen years ago) link

"bus seat cushions"

― nickalicious (nickalicious), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:50 (nineteen years ago) link

If you want
To please your guy
Give him "special"
Lemon pie
LYSOL DOUCHE

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:52 (nineteen years ago) link

Stick it in,
It's lemon-scented!
Woo-enabled,
Stink prevented.
LYSOL DOUCHE!

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:52 (nineteen years ago) link

A disgusting young harlot, Louise,
Had cunt hair right down to her knees.
The crabs in her twat
Tied her hair in a knot
And constructed a flying trapeeze.

― x Jeremy (Atila the Honeybun), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:52 (nineteen years ago) link

so, burma shave, then?

― Ian c=====8 (orion), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:54 (nineteen years ago) link

is there a secret BurmaKitty/Burma Shave vagina connection?

― Ian c=====8 (orion), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:54 (nineteen years ago) link

jeremy, some crazy girl who knows jeff and you and who i met once??? was at !!! last night~!@?@

― Jon Williams!!!!! (ROFFLE!@!@!@) (ex machina), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:54 (nineteen years ago) link

If you need
To clean your clock
it's time to bring
The toxic shock
LYSOL DOUCHE!

― David R. (popshots75`), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:54 (nineteen years ago) link

burma kitty posted n00dz on here, no?

NO WONDER AJA WAS A LOON

― Jon Williams!!!!! (ROFFLE!@!@!@) (ex machina), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:55 (nineteen years ago) link

Tep you are assuming the mantle of godhood here

― J0hn Darn1elle (J0hn Darn1elle), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:55 (nineteen years ago) link

Burma Shave / Burmese Python / Mission of Burma

― x Jeremy (Atila the Honeybun), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:56 (nineteen years ago) link

This thread has been elevated to ridiculous levels of greatness. Thank God no one's around to hear me laughing.

― Vinnie (vprabhu), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:56 (nineteen years ago) link

For Dan:

Now even trannies
can bang a gong
and get with Eddie's
Old Spice dong
LYSOL DOUCHE!

― David R. (popshots75`), Friday, 18 June 2004 18:59 (nineteen years ago) link

I tried soap
To mend my troubles
Making love
Meant making bubbles!
LYSOL DOUCHE!

― Tep (ktepi), Friday, 18 June 2004 19:00 (nineteen years ago) link

When your ugly
Feels the burn
you'll know the buggies
Won't return.
LYSOL DOUCHE!

― x Jeremy (Atila the Honeybun), Friday, 18 June 2004 19:01 (nineteen years ago) link

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