Last (x) Movies you are going to Avoid

It's become especially noticeable since 2020, as if COVID killed editors.

It's weird because something frivolous, fun, but also nicely made and played, that doesn't speak to anything contemporary and 'short' would be just the ticket after 2/3 years of no cinema.

(I am not looking too closely so I'm sure those things are about, but what dominates attention -- and is sadly on my radar -- is stuff like Tar rn)

Length=$ in the streaming era, everyone wants inventory

A nice side effect of this for me personally tho is that Bollywood/Kolywood/Tollywood productions no longer seem daunting. I used to avoid that territory because of lenght issues but now they're just the same size as yet average thing at the cinema.

On my most tinhat days I suspect Hollywood is actively killing off the movie format in order to force people toward prestige TV, where minutes watched is the base metric, not admissions.

It's like one of the metrics for an app. The 'best' ones are usually judged as the ones you never log away from.

I tend tor reserve posts here for awful-looking prestige-y things, rather than bullshit that has no reason to exist in the first place, but: 80 for Brady

^^Ditto for that gruesome looking Tom Hanks thing; too obvious x 10 for this thread, but some kind of nadir for him based on the trailer I saw.

fuck yeah I don't need to see Hanks play a lovable ignorant racist dummy

this scene so fucking unserious son pic.twitter.com/Cqjk7gUqky

— yo raheem is dead somebody shot em (@mrmovedathand) March 16, 2023

i rewatched john wick 2 last night and that scene is so fucking good

these movies do not take place in the real world hope that helps

Yeah it's no different than a film in the John Wooniverse

The John Wick thing has totally passed me by so "doesn't take place in the real world" helps.

I have news for you about every other film.

No please no more news I can't cope.

Air

who fuckin cares about this story

And it played on many screens at my local arthouse in a city where two shut down in the last year.

trailer feels like a parody...like in Maxx Barry's snarky ad-firm satire Syrup, where the characters sell the idea of a film "starring Coca-Cola."

Brand origin stories are the new biopics -- Air, Pinball, Flamin' Hot, etc.

Avoiding on squeamish grounds rather than quality control grounds:

DE HUMANI CORPORIS FABRICA
Verena Paravel, 2022
Plunging into the viscera of human bodies, the directorial duo behind Leviathan open up glistening worlds of ecstatic abstraction. Never shrinking from grit or guts, this fascinating documentary surfaces in underfunded Parisian hospitals, where doctors inject a good dose of humor into disrepair.

This weekend I sat through the trailers twice for About My Father and You Hurt My Feelings; this was three times too many.

Extraction 2. Don't even try to fool me with this one, Letterboxd mutuals

Both Barbie and Oppenheimer

I'd watch a Gerwig-directed Oppenheimer.

Juding by box office it seems I'm not the only one avoiding the new Indiana Jones.

I would avoid that, but my sister wants to go. If it's at an Alamo Drafthouse, I can get regularly replenished drinks during the screening.

I'd watch a Gerwig-directed Oppenheimer.

And I would watch a Nolan-directed Barbie. They should have traded movies.

Barbie played by Tom Hardy

Oppenheimer played by Saorsie Ronan.

Wonder if Oppenheimer will cover the goings on in the Congo as detailed in parts of this piece, rather than torturing a guy's conscience for three hours?

https://www.lrb.co.uk/the-paper/v45/n12/kevin-okoth/poison-is-better

First trailer for Ridley Scott’s ‘NAPOLEON’ starring Joaquin Phoenix. pic.twitter.com/Ab301ec9fN

— Film Updates (@FilmUpdates) July 10, 2023

lots of english actors and Joaquin Phoenix doing stupid 'Allo 'Allo! accents and lots of tedious cgi naval battles... no no no fuck off

lol, will probably still watch it tho!

This'll be better than Joker for sure! idk I'll give Ridley some slack when it comes to a period movie with big epic battles but that's based probably solely on Kingdom of Heaven.

I think I still prefer the never-made Kubrick one.

I continue to be sulky that the 1927 version is still not officially available in Region A. Has Brownlow's work been for nothing?

Gotta get me a polyvision compatible tv.

Sound of Freedom

Yes, not even morbid curiosity will get me to see that. But is there a thread around for discussion of the right-wing media-industrial complex in general, or this specific film's distribution model?

There's always this short-lived thread: Favorite Right-Wing Movies

one of these types of movies comes out every couple weeks now:

Dumb Money is a 2023 American biographical comedy-drama film directed by Craig Gillespie and written by Lauren Schuker Blum and Rebecca Angelo. It is based on the 2021 book The Antisocial Network by Ben Mezrich and chronicles the GameStop short squeeze of January 2021. The film features an ensemble cast that includes Paul Dano, Pete Davidson, Vincent D'Onofrio, America Ferrera, Nick Offerman, Anthony Ramos, Sebastian Stan, Shailene Woodley, and Seth Rogen.

yeah lol it's pretty dire

This level of hackery is almost admirable

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ben_Mezrich#Non-fiction

'Meanwhile, isn't Eddie Redmayne amazing as a Dane, let's give him all the oscars!'

― Frederik B

holy shit this is the best fucking take on The Danish Girl ever

guys you wanna know the problem with The Danish Girl? eddie redmayne ISN'T EVEN DANISH

We've had what the Red Hot Cheetos movie, the beanie babies movie, tetris, blackberry, what other bullshit am I forgetting?

I'd forgotten all about eddie redmayne

i'm just sick and tired of hollywood's constant perpetuation of negative danish stereotypes. it's not as bad as it used to be, for the most part, but nobody understands or wants to acknowledge just how much harm danephobic stereotypes in the media have done to danish people for decades now.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JHQojhNjnks

lol beat me to it

Hollywood has always been envious of Danish culture, so they lean on those stereotypes as a sort of Copenhagen mechanism