I am therefore pleased to announce my future victory in the Super Bowl*
,* which will be held on my couch and which will be filled with tortilla chips
In conclusion: yum, guacamole
― is it milli vanilli or just a facsimile (Ye Mad Puffin), Wednesday, 25 January 2023 00:24 (one year ago) link
he's like a character in some 1980's National Lampoon movie
― Andy the Grasshopper, Wednesday, 25 January 2023 00:30 (one year ago) link
anthony's scaramucci's first press conference as press secretary:
But here’s what I tell you about the President. He’s the most competitive person I’ve ever met. Okay, I’ve seen this guy throw a dead spiral through a tire. I’ve seen him at Madison Square Garden with a topcoat on. He’s standing in the key and he’s hitting foul shots and swishing them, okay? He sinks 30-foot putts. I don’t see this guy as a guy that’s ever under siege. This is a very, very competitive person.
scaramucci-heads will remember that he didn't actually say '30-foot putts', he said '3-foot putts'. the white house communications team just changed it for the transcript. what a weird, weird group of people
https://deadspin.com/white-house-alters-transcript-to-clarify-that-the-presi-1797305596
― Karl Malone, Wednesday, 25 January 2023 00:31 (one year ago) link
You misspelled putz
― is it milli vanilli or just a facsimile (Ye Mad Puffin), Wednesday, 25 January 2023 00:33 (one year ago) link
It’s hard to believe he is an actual person.
― treeship., Wednesday, 25 January 2023 00:38 (one year ago) link
scaramucci-heads
do these exist?
― Andy the Grasshopper, Wednesday, 25 January 2023 00:39 (one year ago) link
Wait 'til he golfs with Santos and they both win
― Andy the Grasshopper, Wednesday, 25 January 2023 00:40 (one year ago) link
i'm assuming someone who runs the occupy democrats account is way down deep in this kind of shit
― Karl Malone, Wednesday, 25 January 2023 00:42 (one year ago) link
whereas i, reminding everyone of how the 30-foot putt mentioned several years ago was actually a reference to a 3-foot putt, float above it trousers unsoiled
― Karl Malone, Wednesday, 25 January 2023 00:43 (one year ago) link
they could have added "He sinks 3 foot putts, blindfolded.." and I would've been impressed
― Andy the Grasshopper, Wednesday, 25 January 2023 00:50 (one year ago) link
bro
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/FnQ9QT3WYAAXYWN?format=jpg&name=medium
― lag∞n, Wednesday, 25 January 2023 03:12 (one year ago) link
Grandpa is drunk but he doesn’t drink
― Karl Malone, Wednesday, 25 January 2023 03:16 (one year ago) link
it's ok, his veins are pumping pure Sweet 'n Sour sauce at this point, his right eye is going to pop out of his head soon
― def jeftones (Neanderthal), Wednesday, 25 January 2023 03:19 (one year ago) link
he's unarguably a warped, dysfunctional human being, but he sure as f*ck knows his audience
― more difficult than I look (Aimless), Wednesday, 25 January 2023 03:46 (one year ago) link
one recent new thing for me to hate about him is how much shittier i eat now. like – he eats mcdonalds and KFC everyday and should have been dead a decade ago. but he's still here, waddling around, sucking oxygen and stuffing his face with quarter pounders. why should i suffer through salads for lunch and be generally unenthusiastic about my meal choices when that pile of shit is still having the time of his life getting mcdicks hand delivered and slathering ketchup on his steaks?!
― FRAUDULENT STEAKS (The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall), Wednesday, 25 January 2023 06:35 (one year ago) link
he does wear diapers though
― StanM, Wednesday, 25 January 2023 09:33 (one year ago) link
eh mcdonalds is not that great. it's not like he gets pleasure from anything--let alone eating
― a (waterface), Wednesday, 25 January 2023 13:39 (one year ago) link
He gets pleasure from hurting people.
― castanuts (DJP), Wednesday, 25 January 2023 13:44 (one year ago) link
The cruelty, and agonising bowel obsctructions, are the point.
― his cartoon heart expands, then he relaxes by smoking crack (stevie), Wednesday, 25 January 2023 14:00 (one year ago) link
why is he still using truth social? wasn't he unbanned?
― treeship., Wednesday, 25 January 2023 14:34 (one year ago) link
Isn't he contractually obligated to continue using Truth Social? Wouldn't going to Twitter pretty much be a confession that Truth Social was as much a failure as Trump U, Trump Steaks, the Trump presidency, etc?
― his cartoon heart expands, then he relaxes by smoking crack (stevie), Wednesday, 25 January 2023 14:36 (one year ago) link
― castanuts (DJP), Wednesday, January 25, 2023 1:44 PM (fifty-five minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink
yep, important point
― a (waterface), Wednesday, 25 January 2023 14:40 (one year ago) link
he always feels bad so he takes pleasure in making others feel bad
maybe that is all that was going on with his negging of silk, a woman mourning her sister who has only every said flattering things about trump
― treeship., Wednesday, 25 January 2023 14:53 (one year ago) link
Isn't he contractually obligated
i doubt this is an obstacle
― normal AI yankovic (Hunt3r), Wednesday, 25 January 2023 14:59 (one year ago) link
Yeah there's been some reports in the last day or so that he's about to ditch Truth Social and move back to Twitter
― groovypanda, Wednesday, 25 January 2023 17:12 (one year ago) link
"MAGA!!" What's this mean? It's not on my chart
https://www.eslbuzz.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/10/6e36d48e7ba734aff65c917eb38c9339.jpg
― Evan, Wednesday, 25 January 2023 17:19 (one year ago) link
xpost There is no way he won't be feuding with Elon soon
― INDEPENDENTS DAY BY STEVEN SPILBERG (President Keyes), Wednesday, 25 January 2023 17:20 (one year ago) link
"Ol' Spacey Elon..."
― an icon of a worried-looking, long-haired, bespectacled man (C. Grisso/McCain), Wednesday, 25 January 2023 17:24 (one year ago) link
That T is still alive is grist for my tinfoil hat conspiracy theory that there is indeed an island full of clones of our ruling class.
― Alicia Silver Stone (Boring, Maryland), Wednesday, 25 January 2023 19:19 (one year ago) link
Harvested for pets, of course.
Parts
Sure maybe pet clones too who knows
"Keptin, ve haff gotten a new shipment of trump hairdos."
https://www.startrek.com/sites/default/files/styles/content_full/public/images/inline/2019-01/b5f9ba8039d9df8b3a6acf08fd5d2e84.jpg
― is it milli vanilli or just a facsimile (Ye Mad Puffin), Wednesday, 25 January 2023 19:28 (one year ago) link
He's getting his FB and Instagram pages back
― his cartoon heart expands, then he relaxes by smoking crack (stevie), Wednesday, 25 January 2023 22:34 (one year ago) link
well I'm sure he has no doubt learned his lesson
<3 living in an era with no real consequences for rich white racists
― Maxmillion D. Boosted (jon /via/ chi 2.0), Wednesday, 25 January 2023 22:36 (one year ago) link
And when TRUTH Social totally implodes, he conveniently has his whipping boy Devin Nunes to blame for it
― Andy the Grasshopper, Wednesday, 25 January 2023 23:20 (one year ago) link
& Devin is already trying to blame the implosion on the feds. https://www.rawstory.com/devin-nunes-truth-social-funding/
― BrianB, Wednesday, 25 January 2023 23:35 (one year ago) link
FB & IG checked to see if he was indicted, yet. nope. must be safe to move ahead with Project Loudmouth Liar
― more difficult than I look (Aimless), Thursday, 26 January 2023 00:23 (one year ago) link
would love for Nunes to be crushed by a backhoe
― def jeftones (Neanderthal), Thursday, 26 January 2023 01:13 (one year ago) link
Or one of his cows.
― nickn, Thursday, 26 January 2023 01:37 (one year ago) link
apparently he said on his little social media platform (in ALL CAPITALS) that he could finish the war in Ukraine in less than 24 hours
― StanM, Friday, 27 January 2023 16:33 (one year ago) link
For whose side?
― عباس کیارستمی (Eric H.), Friday, 27 January 2023 16:38 (one year ago) link
Hello! Vladimir? Donald here. I'm calling about that little scrape you've gotten into in The Ukraine. Yup, it's crazy, I know. But I have an idea. Just hear me out. Those new-cue-lar bombs you've got over there are just collecting dust, right? I say, use 'em. War'll be done in less than 24 hours. No, don't thank me. Happy to help. Bye.
― more difficult than I look (Aimless), Friday, 27 January 2023 17:27 (one year ago) link
More like he would side with Putin, pull all support for Ukraine, pressure allies to do the same and then just let Putin steamroll the country. Done: war finished.
― Josh in Chicago, Friday, 27 January 2023 17:43 (one year ago) link
Nobel prize!
― INDEPENDENTS DAY BY STEVEN SPILBERG (President Keyes), Friday, 27 January 2023 17:46 (one year ago) link
he also claimed Mexico would pay for the Wall, so...
― Andy the Grasshopper, Friday, 27 January 2023 18:11 (one year ago) link
He also claimed peace in the Middle East would be "so easy."
― henry s, Friday, 27 January 2023 18:32 (one year ago) link
starting to think this guy isn't on the level
― INDEPENDENTS DAY BY STEVEN SPILBERG (President Keyes), Friday, 27 January 2023 18:33 (one year ago) link
idk give him a shot why not
― lag∞n, Friday, 27 January 2023 18:57 (one year ago) link