thread for KING CHARLES III (regnal name george vii)

nashwan otm, William will be more palatable to the average subject (because he is more palatable to the papers, as evidence: the last decade of papers)

move fast! break things!

King Charles’s staff given redundancy notice during church service for Queen

Exclusive by ⁦@PippaCrerar⁩ and ⁦@ccdavies⁩ https://t.co/nAcSngcBAI

— Owen Gibson (@owen_g) September 13, 2022

psyched for some wild stories from disgruntled former employees

this man hates pens

How is this real? How is this public?! pic.twitter.com/dZlsNOVREI

— Nooruddean (@BeardedGenius) September 13, 2022

He is going to machine gun the rest of the Royals

he has wanted this for 60+ years and already he hates it *so much*

*prepares the popcorn*

imagine taking the King to a fucking employment tribunal, you'd end up having to pay his legal fees and 10 years of your paltry wages back to him and then get birched for having the effrontery

maybe charles will take the monarchy to a tribunal for constructive dismissal

Lol, what a loser.

Wonder if support for the Monarchy will collapse, he clearly can't keep his mouth shut.

doesnt exactly have the common touch does he

His Majesty is not used to getting ink on his fingers, and it's ruined his entire bloody day.

You can see exactly why his mother stayed in post till her literal death, can’t you

Amazing, simply amazing.

Camilla doing a much better job at this stuff

So the Duchy of Lancaster passes to Charles, and that of Cornwall to Prince William. Did they observe proper protocol, which is to pass the duchy on the left-hand side?

He probably thinks hating pens makes him seem down to earth

xpost This generation
Rules the nation

Ps the amount of people going WELL HE’S JUST LOST HIS MUM as though the guy didn’t literally give interviews saying he was “running out of time”.

All true heads of state use Sharpies.

Fucking pens, how do they work?

the most amazing video I've watched this year

I was working at a recruitment company in Piccadilly when the Queen Mother died, and even before her funeral, the staff were on the phone asking if we had vacancies for cooks, dressers, gardeners, you name it. They were all about to be made homeless. https://t.co/zLSH592cXW

— Elvis Buñuelo (@Mr_Considerate) September 13, 2022

The Duke of York will be a Counsellor of State for the new king. pic.twitter.com/qZPdhjwUjM

— PoliticsJOE (@PoliticsJOE_UK) September 14, 2022

You know what, this is a fair point. Does Charles not bleed? does he not weep at the moonlight? Does his heart not soar when listening to Coldplay? He is one of Us, a flawed, scared sack of bones trying to make the best of existence on this rainy fascist island https://t.co/XKs34NkeD7

— Y (@tinshh) September 14, 2022

King Charles, died 2022 by literally not being able to breathe for being criticised

I'm curious about how the 2 videos of Charles looking grumpy got released. Leaked by a disgruntled member of staff?

can't have 24-7 adoring rolling coverage if you keep binning the material

also i'm guessing there wasn't a need until now to have a full-time tantrum editor keeping a watchful eye, his mum was a seasoned professional who self-edited like a beast -- while her son is a self-important crank weirdo who thinks he knows everything and badly wants to be as beloved but is also angrily terrified he never will be (clue: he never will be)

i also think there's a strong dose of "at last i can be myself!" -- he's spent like forty years biting his lip to not blurt -- and he's discovering this is not going to play at all well, the uninterrupted performance of low-key naturalness is harder work than it looked! turns out laurens van der post doesn't prepare one!

its true the queen was a real pro she encountered tens of thousands of people in her role and seemingly all of them were like she was gracious she asked me about myself and seemed to actually care credit where its due

throwing multiple public fits about pens in your first week on the job is pretty far on the other end of the spectrum

each finger segment a Fall Guy, racing to drown itself in the inkwell

Is there going to be a separate ten day mourning period to mourn the crowning of Charles

He's already causing trouble with the royalty of other nations

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/8/8b/Conversations_with_Queen.jpg

Reading the Wikipedia page for Diana’s funeral (which I didn’t watch)

Alastair Campbell later revealed in his diaries that the government and the royal household feared for the security of Prince Charles, believing that he would possibly get attacked by the crowd, thus they ensured that he would be accompanied by his sons. Prince Philip, the Duke of Edinburgh, initially opposed the idea of William and Harry taking part in the funeral procession, but ultimately decided to walk besides them, telling his grandsons "I'll walk if you walk."William later described the experience as "one of the hardest things I've ever done", and Harry mentioned no child "should be asked to do" what they did. Nevertheless, William saw the act as a necessity to maintain "balance between duty and family" and Harry said that he was "very glad" that he took part in the procession.

In other words everyone knew it was brutally wrong but they did it anyway because of the tampon thing.

Does Charles not bleed? does he not weep at the moonlight? Does his heart not soar when listening to Coldplay? He is one of Us,

What if Charles was one of us

Just a stranger on the bus

nice piece by owen hatherley in jacobin abt how C3's poor understanding of architecture is party shaped by his never once being on a bus (or alone walking round a building or a city unchaperoned)

is the coffin taking visitors so everyone can whisper into the side of the coffin 'i'm glad yer dead'

its true the queen was a real pro she encountered tens of thousands of people in her role and seemingly all of them were like she was gracious she asked me about myself and seemed to actually care credit where its due

I encountered her once in a line-up greet-the-staff at work, made the mistake of speaking before she'd spoken to me; she gave me a look like Medusa, still haunts me.

not captured on the camera tho, there's her skill right there

I was commissioned to write this on Charles and architecture and rather than put the boot in I've tried to work out whatever the hell was actually going on https://t.co/zj40YDcohH

— Owen Hatherley (@owenhatherley) September 14, 2022

good piece by Hatherley, all the stuff about his huge property portfolio in Transylvania and his nightmare model village, Poundbury is new to me.

when i was at crafts magazine our printers was very near poundbury and once when we visited (to see what printers did, i guess a kind of diplomatic gladhand) we were told lots of local stories about how unappealing it is to live in: for exmple that many of the streets were built quite narrow -- to look old fashioned and quaint and possibly also to discourage heavy traffic -- which means the county bin lorries can't navigate them and everyone in the relevant streets has to crossly drag their bins for several blocks to the nearest actual pick-up point

authentically peasant-like except your actual peasants wd've just dumped their rubbish wherever

Pound Town

Poundbury is so weird, an uncanny valley of a town plonked down on the edge of Dorchester like some kind of bulbous egg sac adhered to the corpse of British town planning. Owen Hatherley should run psychogeographic tourist buses there.

Poundbury Doh! Boy

I once worked on the Creswell Model Village. Lots of open space and attractive houses with quite big rooms and high ceilings. CIII is more about building houses out of contempt for the people that live in them.

it is ironic that charles has (supposedly) been fuming his whole life about the indignities imposed on him by mummy (apparently) re not being allowed to be himself and quickly discovering this week that the job is exactly as advertised

Ivar the Boneless one of the few monarchs to have a KFC meal deal named in his honour

don’t forget æthelred the zinger tower

Pancreatic cancer was the same thing that killed Steve jobs. Charles seems like the kind of person to try the same treatment (nuts and berries etc).

nuts and buried morelike