another maniacal Armond White review, this time "Fahrenheit 9/11"

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https://letterboxd.com/notarmondwhite/film/lightyear-2022/

Lightyear proves that the folks at Pixar and Disney are past masters at audience manipulation, now known as “grooming.”

Yeah, that's not what people are using the word "grooming" to insinuate.

Eggs Benedick (Eric H.), Friday, 17 June 2022 13:28 (one year ago) link

three weeks pass...

Father Stu aside, this seems like a highly non-maniacal mid-year list: https://letterboxd.com/notarmondwhite/list/mid-year-reckoning-2022/

Bait Kush (Eric H.), Wednesday, 13 July 2022 14:11 (one year ago) link

one month passes...

Idiot Chalamet has not yet had a popular hit. Only Hollywood media likes him and reward him with attention. #DenyChalamet https://t.co/HpsGyRiIPR

— Armond White (@3xchair) September 2, 2022

papal hotwife (milo z), Friday, 2 September 2022 23:41 (one year ago) link

I guess Dune was a bust?

immodesty blaise (jimbeaux), Friday, 2 September 2022 23:47 (one year ago) link

And Little Women?

Malevolent Arugula (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Friday, 2 September 2022 23:53 (one year ago) link

OK, I shouldn't have read the last month of tweets. We shouldn't even link to him anymore.

Malevolent Arugula (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Friday, 2 September 2022 23:57 (one year ago) link

I was searching something today and his Licorice Pizza review came up. (He liked it.) Opening sentence: "Paul Thomas Anderson’s most famous films, Boogie Nights and There Will Be Blood, cursed America."

Whether you love, hate, or are indifferent to Boogie Nights, I don't see how you can view it as a curse on America. I mean, if you hate it, one of the reasons might be that it views the porn industry as a nurturing, extended family. One of the main reasons I love it are joyous moments like "Those are great names!" (or the serenity of the final tracking shot through Burt Reynolds' house). It's not a mean or judgmental film at all.

clemenza, Saturday, 3 September 2022 00:41 (one year ago) link

OK, I shouldn't have read the last month of tweets. We shouldn't even link to him anymore.

I mean, this one is pretty funny, regardless of intention.

Just watched a TV trivia game show in which no one remembered Sandra Bullock's #Netflix hit @Birdbox. pic.twitter.com/APrPNkTkXh

— Armond White (@3xchair) September 1, 2022

Bait Kush (Eric H.), Saturday, 3 September 2022 16:17 (one year ago) link

It's not a mean or judgmental film at all.

Not saying it's "mean" to condemn a pedophile, but the film's epilogue specifically exists to reward the good-hearted characters and punish the bad. If anything, it's too insistent on the audience finding the majority of the characters as lovable as the filmmakers do.

Halfway there but for you, Saturday, 3 September 2022 17:40 (one year ago) link

The Colonel meets with a bad end, of course, but that's about it. Anyway, your last sentence makes the same point that I do: it's not a film that, love it or despise it, "cursed America." (There Will Be Blood, sure.)

clemenza, Saturday, 3 September 2022 18:08 (one year ago) link

https://www.nationalreview.com/2018/04/review-freaks-and-geeks-documentary-show-made-nihilism-cool/

Haven't read it yet, but--after a slow start for the first three or four episodes--Freaks & Geeks is great. So I'm counting on lots of maniacal stuff in there.

clemenza, Thursday, 15 September 2022 17:03 (one year ago) link

That review's actually four years old...I went looking for a Godard comment from White, and that was at the top of his Twitter page for some reason.

clemenza, Thursday, 15 September 2022 17:07 (one year ago) link

two months pass...

Armond's now retweeting Lara Logan and Don Jr. He's gone.

عباس کیارستمی (Eric H.), Wednesday, 23 November 2022 22:12 (one year ago) link

Armond has been gone since this thread started.

castanuts (DJP), Friday, 25 November 2022 14:31 (one year ago) link

two weeks pass...

His She Said review is, well, maniacal, topped off by this: "She Said follows that specious line of media self-celebration that began with All the President’s Men, the most overrated film in American movie history." Didn't he stop to consider that AtPM is the kind of film that's being pushed to the margins of the Sight & Sound poll? I think he's going to short-circuit and explode soon as he tries to balance all these crusades.

https://www.nationalreview.com/2022/11/she-saids-celebrity-grudge-match/

clemenza, Sunday, 11 December 2022 23:01 (one year ago) link

AtPM was already well on the margins of the S&S poll before this year

عباس کیارستمی (Eric H.), Monday, 12 December 2022 00:24 (one year ago) link

"the kind of film"--i.e., I'm speaking more generally there.

clemenza, Monday, 12 December 2022 01:07 (one year ago) link

Ah right, New Hollywood and all. Carry on

عباس کیارستمی (Eric H.), Monday, 12 December 2022 01:18 (one year ago) link

three weeks pass...

As per usual, his better-than list remains one of the comparatively reasonably/useful things he does any longer:

Throughout 2022, it felt as if Hollywood was daring us to go to the movies. Commercial films either offended one’s intelligence or failed to entertain. When the prestige movie glut began during awards season, it was obvious that most filmmakers were interested only in their own political bias, wrongly assuming that the public would buy it.

Examining the invasion of arrogance, incompetence, and obnoxiousness (and Sight & Sound’s feminist putsch) is both the work and pleasure of criticism — especially needed as the culture tilts toward collapse.

Making a status-quo Ten Best list would be delusional, but this year’s Better-Than List sets antidote against poison, hope against despair. It challenges media hype with good cinema alternatives.

Benediction > Tár

Terence Davies’s opulent Siegfried Sassoon biopic is also a powerful personal reflection on the director’s spiritual, sexual struggle. That same concept becomes so histrionic in Todd Field’s snob-culture take-down, it ridicules itself. Bravo to Jack Lowdon’s silent monologue — the performance of the year.

Father Stu > Everything Everywhere All at Once

Rosalind Ross directs Mark Wahlberg as Father Stuart Long, whose funny and moving religious conversion found real-life, real-cinema faith (Mel Gibson and Jacki Weaver complete the road-to-Damascus jubilation). But the Daniels team in Everything preferred cut-rate Buddhism over Christianity, wasting Michelle Yeoh in a chaotic, faithless, exhaustingly unfunny superheroine jamboree.

Ambulance > Top Gun: Maverick

Michael Bay rescues the American ideal with cinematic brio and working-class brotherhood while Tom Cruise repurposed ’80s junk as America First desperation. Bay’s dazzling vision is superlative. Anyone who doesn’t realize that Maverick is silly is just being silly.

Marx Can Wait > The Fabelmans

Marco Bellocchio’s personal family-tragedy doc reveals the depths of his artistic impulses, yet Spielberg’s indulgence of his own oft-repeated Freudian-Marxist legend (via Tony Kushner) rings totally false.

Dead for a Dollar > The Woman King

Walter Hill’s esoteric Western dramatizes modern America’s conflicting race, sex, and history myths anchored by Rachel Brosnahan’s defiant agency, the opposite of Gina Prince-Bythewood’s misandrist Afro-eccentricity.

Petit Maman > Aftersun

Celine Sciamma’s storybook fantasy intuits a child’s uncanny adult empathy, besting Charlotte Well’s unfocussed, amateurish pretend home movie. A mother-and-child reunion vs. father–daughter estrangement.

Big Bug > Nope

Jean-Pierre Jeunet makes the first great satire of the Covid-era lockdown and Big Tech enslavement. Jordan Peele looks for and curses Hollywood racism while fumbling sci-fi genre tropes.

Nitram > The Banshees of Inisherin

Justin Kurzel probes the psychic roots of an unnerving 1996 New Zealand mass murder through amazing characterizations. Martin McDonagh exploits Irish misanthropy, concocting tribal fakelore.

Raymond & Ray > Babylon

Rodrigo García’s poignant sibling drama unites a broken family and heals a broken land with compassion (not “community”) — a Borzage film for the Millennium. Damien Chazelle’s phony, overwrought history of Hollywood celebrates a broken film industry but degrades its legacy.

My Donkey, My Lover & I > EO

Caroline Vignal’s road movie follows a single woman’s love hunt through the profundity of movie romanticism (from Robert Bresson to Howard Hawks). Jerzy Skolimowski’s updated remake of a Bresson classic is strictly for nihilists.

Crimes of the Future > Decision to Leave

David Cronenberg’s analogy to decadent cinema laments society’s lost morality while Park Chan-wook’s slick, grotesque policier is decadence itself.

Lost Illusions > She Said

Xavier Giannoli’s 19th-century Balzac adaptation exposes corrupt media then and now while Maria Schrader clumsily turns New York Times reporters into petulant feminist Wooodward-Bernsteins.

Poly Styrene: I Am a Cliché, Personality Crisis: One Night Only > All the Beauty and the Bloodshed

Salutes to two pop music artists (X-Ray Spex and David Johansen) are preferable to Laura Poitras’s nauseating politicization of cultural pseud-activist Nan Goldin. Enjoy the rock ’n’ roll and beware the derangement syndrome.

My Son Hunter > Armageddon Time

Robert Davi’s compassionate critique of an unignorable political scandal shames James Gray’s made-up TDS scandal. Doofus Gray’s America-hating autobiography is Fabelmans for dullards.

Great Freedom > The Eternal Daughter

Sebastian Meise recalls the lifelong radicalism of one man (Franz Rogowski), but Joanna Hogg’s metaphysical slog is just sub–Sofia Coppola navel-gazing.

Peaceful > The Whale

Emmanuelle Bercot concentrates on the wide impact of the mortality of an artist/father/son (Benoit Magimel). Darren Aronofsky’s embarrassing romp through all social-victim categories pretends spiritual uplift.

Peter von Kant > Tár

Just when we’ve lost sight of art’s purpose, actor Denis Ménochet’s vivid emotionalism breaks through Brecht’s vaunted V-Effekt and director François Ozon transforms Fassbinder’s own alienation devices. Cate Blanchett and Todd Field get tangled in their own false sophistication, a sign of bad times.

Bones and All > The Menu

Luca Guadagnino’s teen-cannibals-in-love movie says more about Gen Z apathy than Adam McKay’s latest failed greedy-bourgeois satire.

Tár is this year's winner of the "multiple better-than list slams" derby.

عباس کیارستمی (Eric H.), Friday, 6 January 2023 17:35 (one year ago) link

Prejudices and bigotry not in full bloom throughout but for him only merely hinted at this time (relatively speaking)

omar little, Friday, 6 January 2023 17:42 (one year ago) link

Basically yeah. Also, "Tom Cruise repurposed ’80s junk as America First desperation ... Anyone who doesn’t realize that Maverick is silly is just being silly" is his "one for me" given his forum/audience.

عباس کیارستمی (Eric H.), Friday, 6 January 2023 17:47 (one year ago) link

I’m glad his personality defects have given him a safe space free from pushback and a paycheck.

Also:

But the Daniels team in Everything preferred cut-rate Buddhism over Christianity

Man what decent human wouldn’t these days

omar little, Friday, 6 January 2023 17:51 (one year ago) link

On the other hand, there is also the first tangible evidence that he will, ultimately, re-evaluate the works of Dinesh D'Souza someday soon ...

My Son Hunter > Armageddon Time
My Son Hunter > Armageddon Time
My Son Hunter > Armageddon Time
My Son Hunter > Armageddon Time
My Son Hunter > Armageddon Time
My Son Hunter > Armageddon Time
My Son Hunter > Armageddon Time
My Son Hunter > Armageddon Time
My Son Hunter > Armageddon Time
My Son Hunter > Armageddon Time
My Son Hunter > Armageddon Time

عباس کیارستمی (Eric H.), Friday, 6 January 2023 17:55 (one year ago) link

lol would be surprised if he hasn’t gone there already

I guess my thing is AW now uses criticism as a mere delivery system for rallying bigoted forces to a fascist cause, he rode the pipeline in such a predictable and mediocre fashion and his career has a tragic arc. Reading flappy’s defenses upthread also reminds me there are plenty of people who love to see a good rant and don’t care about the collateral damage.

omar little, Friday, 6 January 2023 18:16 (one year ago) link

I guess my thing is AW now uses criticism as a mere delivery system for rallying bigoted forces to a fascist cause, he rode the pipeline in such a predictable and mediocre fashion and his career has a tragic arc.

This is exactly right. It's not even "blind pig finds acorn"/"broken clock is right twice a day" — there's absolutely no value in his opinions anymore. Even if you agree with him politically, his table-pounding is so fucking tedious. That said, I've been meaning to see Dead For A Dollar anyway, and now I want to know more about Nitram.

but also fuck you (unperson), Friday, 6 January 2023 18:39 (one year ago) link

exhaustingly unfunny superheroine jamboree.

well, this is the exact correct summation of everything everywhere

J0rdan S., Friday, 6 January 2023 18:49 (one year ago) link

AW now uses criticism as a mere delivery system for rallying bigoted forces to a fascist cause

Wow, well put.

These pairings make less sense than ever, in large part because he's collapsed so badly as a writer; a good writer can connect disparate things.

Malevolent Arugula (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Friday, 6 January 2023 19:21 (one year ago) link

Yeah and he’s collapsed partially because he’s way too concerned about making sure he leaves space for anti-trans/anti-female/anti-sexual assault victims/etc in his non-reviews

omar little, Friday, 6 January 2023 19:26 (one year ago) link

To be honest I never thought much of him as a writer, he was never very good at specifics of cinema and his opinions were dishonest and based upon the reactions of others. For example hence his championing of the unknown, not distributed Hurt Locker curdling into distaste as soon as it started getting positive notices from everyone else.

omar little, Friday, 6 January 2023 19:29 (one year ago) link

Big Tech enslavement

God is there somebody particularly stupid about America reactionary thinking more than the usual

Glower, Disruption & Pies (kingfish), Friday, 6 January 2023 20:14 (one year ago) link

Yeah and he’s collapsed partially because he’s way too concerned about making sure he leaves space for anti-trans/anti-female/anti-sexual assault victims/etc in his non-reviews

There’s an interesting parallel(or direct linkage) with how collapsed American movement conservatism is, too.

Glower, Disruption & Pies (kingfish), Friday, 6 January 2023 20:18 (one year ago) link

he's collapsed so badly as a writer

This ... or else he doesn't have editors who are willing to help him out anymore. There's always that possibility too.

عباس کیارستمی (Eric H.), Friday, 6 January 2023 20:23 (one year ago) link

It’s my own fault for clicking on this thread but, much like Kanye, I just wish an air conditioner would fall on his head so I didn’t have to hear about him anymore

castanuts (DJP), Friday, 6 January 2023 22:03 (one year ago) link

It’s not even like the niche relevance he at one time had is there anymore. He just exists so dicks can say “look, we got one on our side who’s Black AND gay!” He’s the platonic ideal of a token and we’d all be better off if we stopped paying attention to him.

castanuts (DJP), Friday, 6 January 2023 22:05 (one year ago) link

otm

Malevolent Arugula (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Friday, 6 January 2023 22:13 (one year ago) link

I posted an excerpt from his EO review in the Polish film thread. A+ mania, in which a Polish donkey is uncovered as a co-conspirator in the "the Biden age."

https://www.nationalreview.com/2022/12/eo-a-fable-of-the-great-reset/

clemenza, Saturday, 7 January 2023 22:31 (one year ago) link

"Enjoy the rock ’n’ roll and beware the derangement syndrome." I love this line. I don't know what it means, but I intend to use it, maybe on anyone I see listening to music.

gjoon1, Sunday, 8 January 2023 12:46 (one year ago) link

would spoonerize

one month passes...

Armond gets in some more "Better Thans..." under the guise of reviewing Truffaut deep cut Blus

https://www.nationalreview.com/2023/02/the-truffaut-touch-and-touchstones/

I really don't want to give him clicks.

Malevolent Arugula (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Sunday, 26 February 2023 06:34 (one year ago) link

four months pass...

Why did Spielberg abandon Indiana Jones? Not directing Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny — Spielberg was busy ruining West Side Story and fabricating The Fabelmans, instead — makes for the sorriest news of parental neglect since millionaire influence-peddler Hunter Biden got his child support reduced.

fair but so uncool beliefs here (Eric H.), Friday, 7 July 2023 17:40 (nine months ago) link

he goes after Spielberg like a scorned psychotic ex-lover. talk about a guy whose criticism says everything about him and nil about his subjects...

omar little, Friday, 7 July 2023 18:03 (nine months ago) link

one month passes...

A fine new entry

Perfect, Robert Davi. A portrait of strength. https://t.co/G5vAwRKGXE

— Armond White (@3xchair) August 25, 2023

fair but so uncool beliefs here (Eric H.), Friday, 25 August 2023 02:24 (seven months ago) link

So many miniature American tragedies playing out in real time as they fall for that dude, and Armond would be another one if he wasn't already kind of a dickhead.

omar little, Friday, 25 August 2023 02:33 (seven months ago) link

Tagging catturd2 and, instead, settling for Arm0nd is just one of those moments that make life worth living

fair but so uncool beliefs here (Eric H.), Friday, 25 August 2023 02:37 (seven months ago) link

Maybe he can compile a special Better-Than list for famous mug shots.

clemenza, Friday, 25 August 2023 02:48 (seven months ago) link

one month passes...

Unfollowed him on Twitter, finally

50 Best Fellas (Eric H.), Thursday, 28 September 2023 02:47 (six months ago) link

two weeks pass...

The teens in TikTok clips who pitifully bounce and sing along with the film’s pre-recorded concert are the flip side of those nerds and sociopaths who lined up for The Dark Knight Rises ...

OK, sure.

... in Aurora, Colo.

oh.

Dwigt Rortugal (Eric H.), Wednesday, 18 October 2023 14:53 (six months ago) link

dude is deeply unwell, just an actually mentally ill man ineptly weaponized by the right wing

omar little, Wednesday, 18 October 2023 19:03 (six months ago) link


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