Where Are We Runnin’? - American Politics Thread, May 2022

well let's see, let's start off with who is who is the most racist. then we're going to check off the "cruelty" column. of course, both of these now fall under the heading "white ohio christians". you also get a +25 if you're a reaaaaaaaaaaaal piece of shit

damn, jd vance checks ALL of these boxes!!!!!!

*JD Vance takes a giant shit in a box marked "heathens"*

*JD Vance's polls improve +8 overnight with cryptofucks*

*great news for the economy, stocks fall -2.5%*
*we're all dying, again, stocks rise 3.4%*

Hillbilly NFT

This district went to Trump by 16%. Kudos to Glanville for running an amazing campaign against a far right opponent. Sow the wind, reap the whirlwind. https://t.co/FrxHZcH39N

— Aaron (@BobbyBigWheel) May 4, 2022

Tim Ryan's pretty racist too, it will depend on whether being 'tough on China' or Mexico sells better.

obv there are much more important things going on but something about the fact that when my time is up JD Vance will still be a United States Senator makes me just want to walk into traffic

probably has to call himself J.D. so people don't mix him up with Jack Vance

his name is Jank Dirk, he just won't say it

tim ryan is no great shakes but he did pledge to eliminate the filibuster if elected so

kinda thinking of changing my name tbh

Judge Dredd
Just Deal
Jah Dude

haaaaaaaaaaa

no, you are the true J.D.

Vance is a Jarn Dorf

xp

If nothing else, the Democratic Party is blowing up my phone

Oh yeah, the pleas for cash are coming in hot and heavy.

As much of a losing proposition as it is, the Dem party where I live just need people to run. So many uncontested seats.

This is the weirdest way to remind everyone that you fucked a literal teenager. pic.twitter.com/MxJlPkHvLO

— Ari Drennen (@AriDrennen) May 4, 2022

Overthrowing republican government in favor of a Herschel Walker/JD Vance/Tommy Tuberville triumvirate.

Needs more football players, maybe a lineman

Sing it with me folks

Whoa oooh oooh oh
Howie Long est time

He's PST I think

Because I have been married for many years, and because Gaetz is too stupid to capitalize the first letter of a product name, I literally just had to Google "bumble match."

Fuck I forgot Dr. Oz might be in the Senate too

Next pandemic we’ll have President Oz, shilling green coffee beans as a cure

Is it the Senate, or a terrible late-period Match Game panel?

House Majority Whip says that when he calls Rep Henry Cuellar his friend, he really means it. He praises Cuellar for building bridges, rather than hurling insults or avoiding colleagues pic.twitter.com/t5lOQbYA1M

— Jack Herrera (@jherrerx) May 4, 2022

Holy fuck do not search Madison Cawthorn right now

so the FL Bankers Assoc is having a dinner for Ron DeSantis tonight at this downtown Tampa hotel where I’m staying for work. wonder how fast they’ll have me forcibly removed if, should we have the unlikely occasion to cross paths, I cordially extend him the option of sucking my dick from the back?

Tampa is nice this time of year, sorry

A new hit against me just dropped.

Years ago, in this video, I was being crass with a friend, trying to be funny.

We were acting foolish, and joking.

That’s it.

I’m NOT backing down.

I told you there would be a drip drip campaign.

Blackmail won't win. We will.

— Madison Cawthorn (@CawthornforNC) May 4, 2022

Like the video is blurry enough just say it ain’t you. Have you learned nothing from the Trump years

why is every day of this idiotic man’s life a fraternity hazing event

Just cousins bein cousins

what's the new video? Just the groin grope?

looks more like a video rated .5 stars on a gay porn tube because it’s too short and all you see is ass

How is he not naming names about who invited him to the coke orgies at this point?

in other words it’s clearly supposed to be a smear, a homophobic smear.

i hate Cawthorn but the logic driving this group’s campaign against him is equally fucking reprehensible

I’ve seen enough. Our next president.

https://frinkiac.com/img/S11E16/709960.jpg

I don't like him at all, but straight guys who have male friends who are mostly gay have been big in my life

This is the accurate take and why I’m only partially joking about him being a better candidate now than DeSantis, at least:

The video seems very bad, but there’s a pretty stunning lack of knowledge in bro culture from progressives on here who never left the quiet dorm. That doesn’t mean Cawthorn isn’t a shit head — he is! But a lot of people on here have no ability to understand fratty bro culture.

— Tyler Dinucci!! (@TylerDinucci) May 4, 2022

I admit, I have made little effort to understand fratty bro culture.

in other words it’s clearly supposed to be a smear, a homophobic smear.

i hate Cawthorn but the logic driving this group’s campaign against him is equally fucking reprehensible

― we need outrage! we need dicks!! (the table is the table),

tabes, I think you're missing the point. The leaks are not for you and me. The leaks are meant for donors and colleagues as evil as Cawthorn. Calling them homophobic is description, not criticism.

Fraternity culture is all about domination and submission, it makes perfect sense that certain homosexual acts happen in fraternities, whether consensual or not.

Sleeping in bed together naked? Exaggerated moaning and actual dicksucking? I mean come on, this kid is gay as the day is long and also a total fucking piece of shit! The problem isn’t the first part but the last part! Even some left types seem gleeful! It’s fucked!

in other words it’s clearly supposed to be a smear, a homophobic smear.

i hate Cawthorn but the logic driving this group’s campaign against him is equally fucking reprehensible

― we need outrage! we need dicks!! (the table is the table),

tabes, I think you're missing the point. The leaks are not for you and me. The leaks are meant for donors and colleagues as evil as Cawthorn. Calling them homophobic is description, not criticism.

Republicans engaging in homophobia against their own?! Shock!

It's not clear from what you wrote, unless I misinterpreted it. That's why I couldn't stand when libs felt a need to posture on Twitter last week. "I hate Cawthorn BUT no one should attack him for wearing women's clothing," etc.

Read the room, ladies and gents. This is intraparty civil war.

This is North Carolina's atrocious GOP establishment attacking an atrocious man.

Whoever is leaking this is kind of fucking up bc the coke orgies story probably would’ve been forgotten in a week, people on the left probably assumed he just made it up and people on the right could easily convince themselves it was actually the Democrats, those sick fucks. Now everyone knows the story is true and if he loses re-election he’ll probably start naming names, unless they have more on him I suppose. Based on the story about his ex-wife it seems pretty clear the dude is really easy to manipulate if nothing else.