Worst TV adverts of the moment

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The ad whick compares car swapping to wife swapping. Amazingly dirty & disturbing for network tv.

― Sterling Clover, Wednesday, 28 November 2001 01:00 (twenty-two years ago) link

one year passes...

That 'Hard nosed businessman' Stephen Fry narrated Orange campaign. Utterly crass, stretched from an idea with no mileage in it whatsoever. What were they thinking?

― N. (nickdastoor), Wednesday, 9 April 2003 16:03 (twenty-one years ago) link

Aw Nick you are too hard! I think that one's quite funny - I like the guy bossing his son around on the beach.

― Jerry the Nipper (Jerrynipper), Wednesday, 9 April 2003 16:10 (twenty-one years ago) link

his son should have a little metal nose.

― RJG (RJG), Wednesday, 9 April 2003 16:11 (twenty-one years ago) link

But how does the steel-nosed businessman supposed to appeal to us or fit in with anything they are trying to convey about Orange?

― N. (nickdastoor), Wednesday, 9 April 2003 16:13 (twenty-one years ago) link

So...are you gellin'?

Are you gellin' like a felon?

― Michael Daddino (epicharmus), Wednesday, 9 April 2003 16:21 (twenty-one years ago) link

does = is

― N. (nickdastoor), Wednesday, 9 April 2003 16:32 (twenty-one years ago) link

S'all about being available all the time, N. And being ordered. And cutting costs. It will appeal to your average city wanker type. I know - I work with enough of them.

― SittingPretty (sittingpretty), Wednesday, 9 April 2003 16:47 (twenty-one years ago) link

The cunts in the Direct line ad win this every time. There relationship must be the most sexless, depressing, denial-laden relationship ever.

― Mark C (Mark C), Wednesday, 9 April 2003 17:06 (twenty-one years ago) link

But yr city wanker type doesn't want to be cuddly-caricatured by sodding Stephen Fry, surely? And the rest of us just think 'Errgh - mobile phones are for wankers after all. We were right in 1987.'.

― N. (nickdastoor), Wednesday, 9 April 2003 17:14 (twenty-one years ago) link

eleven months pass...

the new 'whens-a your-a Dolmio day?' featuring those actually quite well made puppets...backward step in Anglo-Italin relations or a cuddly tribute to the nuances of our pasta-munching cousins?

― stevem (blueski), Tuesday, 23 March 2004 15:28 (twenty years ago) link

six months pass...

So yeah, apart from the Clairol Fruit Essences one with the crappy monkeys, the one I have to turn over for at the moment is the '"I wish I were a blue whale" Strongbow one. Does anyone else find it excruciating. That man is so objectionable and the whole concept of the ad is so shit. Strongbow ads are always rubbish. I hate the world of cider drinkers they depict.

― Alba (Alba), Friday, 1 October 2004 09:32 (nineteen years ago) link

At the moment the Toucan "last phone call" ads are driving me bonkers. Cause they show them CONSTANTLY during CSI.

― Danger Whore (kate), Friday, 1 October 2004 09:34 (nineteen years ago) link

The Clairol one is crap because it starts off as a generic "let's (almost) show a nice looking woman's tits" advert and ends with this jarring Godardian jumpcut to a pair of unfunny monkeys

― Jedermann sein eigener Fussball (Dada), Friday, 1 October 2004 09:35 (nineteen years ago) link

Those fucking adverts with Craig Thingy from the Royle Family - where he does the "I ran into an old friend" joke - a joke which was actually discovered in Tutankhamun's tomb except there it was about chariots. And that gormless Terry Fuckwit routine he does is almost as ancient.

― Jedermann sein eigener Fussball (Dada), Friday, 1 October 2004 09:38 (nineteen years ago) link

Hard to think of a really atrociously bad current advert which doesn't involve Johnny Vaughan or Dougie Donnelly.

― Marcello Carlin, Friday, 1 October 2004 09:44 (nineteen years ago) link

"Maybe it's because I'm a drug dealer
That I've got a career in the media"

― Jedermann sein eigener Fussball (Dada), Friday, 1 October 2004 09:45 (nineteen years ago) link

the latest abhorrent ad trend: slogans that are meant to sound like realpeoplespeak ("i'm lovin' it"*; "you should see what's on hgtv"**; "very funny"***; "you should go"****). ugh, stop trying to relate! i hate you.

*mcdonald's
**hgtv (home & garden television)
***tbs (the turner superstation)
****t.j. maxx

― pfeffernuesse (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 1 October 2004 09:51 (nineteen years ago) link

also, dunno if it's just a local thing, but the "man on the street"-style 1-800-MATTRESS commercial with the trio of accenty longislandistas singing the jingle off-key... it's gotta go.

― pfeffernuesse (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 1 October 2004 09:57 (nineteen years ago) link

the...lenny...kravitz...gap...ad...

― Marcello Carlin, Friday, 1 October 2004 09:58 (nineteen years ago) link

"they're just a kid... eatin' a drumstick... like YOU used to be."

― pfeffernuesse (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 1 October 2004 10:02 (nineteen years ago) link

"your website would be the bomb if the gecko did the robot."

― pfeffernuesse (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 1 October 2004 10:05 (nineteen years ago) link

Marcello so on the money he should be the queen. And Sarah Jessica Fucking Horsefaced Harpy Parker as well! Infamy!

― Markelby (Mark C), Friday, 1 October 2004 10:39 (nineteen years ago) link

Also, Smirnoff ice or whatever and their lyriquid perfection shit. Only gaked-up ad wankers could actually watch the Niccan Micra spafe abomination and think "yeah, let's rip that off".

― Markelby (Mark C), Friday, 1 October 2004 10:42 (nineteen years ago) link

"di saronno on the rocks." (woman gives come-hither look to metrosexual bartender.)

"di saronno on the rocks." (metrosexual bartender gives come-fuck-me look to woman.)

― pfeffernuesse (Jody Beth Rosen), Friday, 1 October 2004 10:52 (nineteen years ago) link

Quote. Me. Happy.

― Jedermann sein eigener Fussball (Dada), Friday, 1 October 2004 10:53 (nineteen years ago) link

is that ridiculous Head & Shoulders advert where the man won't let his gf use his manky cheap dandruff shampoo still showing?

― Alba (Alba), Friday, 1 October 2004 10:58 (nineteen years ago) link

The man in that advert is *so* in-the-closet.

"She even steals my rubber duckie ... but there's one thing I won't let her touch. Some things are just made for a man."

(plus, he looks like Will Young)

― caitlin (caitlin), Friday, 1 October 2004 10:59 (nineteen years ago) link

He's in another advert too, not as crap but still crap

― Jedermann sein eigener Fussball (Dada), Friday, 1 October 2004 11:00 (nineteen years ago) link

"your website would be the bomb if the gecko did the robot."

But thats a good commercial.

― Mari Schwarz, Friday, 1 October 2004 11:01 (nineteen years ago) link

when are they going to do a new 'friendly bacteria' advert - is the geek going to get in her pants?

― Brigadier Rainham Steele, Mrs (blueski), Friday, 1 October 2004 12:12 (nineteen years ago) link

Will she use the friendly bacteria as a homemade thrush cure first? ;-)

― Danger Whore (kate), Friday, 1 October 2004 12:14 (nineteen years ago) link

why the wink?

― Brigadier Rainham Steele, Mrs (blueski), Friday, 1 October 2004 12:37 (nineteen years ago) link

Because I am making a funny.

― Danger Whore (kate), Friday, 1 October 2004 12:38 (nineteen years ago) link

is the gecko ad referenced a geico ad? those are the only ads on tv I like!

still, that sprint or whatever ad, "this is the story about my life made by me" video phone crooked mouthed girl partying with her friends and getting it on with keanu-lite. makes me violent.

― kyle (akmonday), Friday, 1 October 2004 12:44 (nineteen years ago) link

(a friend of mine has just auditioned for the next run of "friendly bacteria" ads - if she gets the gig she'll be bacteria-girl's best friend. So have no fear, Bacteria-man will be back!)

― Markelby (Mark C), Friday, 1 October 2004 13:11 (nineteen years ago) link

Rock-ET! Rock-ET!

― Wooden (Wooden), Friday, 1 October 2004 13:13 (nineteen years ago) link

RADDICCIO RADDICCIO RADDICCIO!!!

You're mad, that advert is aceness incarnate.

― Danger Whore (kate), Friday, 1 October 2004 13:13 (nineteen years ago) link

Those 'frizee frizee' guys are so gay.

― Wooden (Wooden), Friday, 1 October 2004 13:19 (nineteen years ago) link

I do kind of like how the rocket lot are the hardest, though. I love rocket.

― Wooden (Wooden), Friday, 1 October 2004 13:25 (nineteen years ago) link

i have no idea what most of you are on about as i don't watch much TV at all anymore which is surely a good thing

― Brigadier Rainham Steele, Mrs (blueski), Friday, 1 October 2004 13:41 (nineteen years ago) link

I can't watch the Cadbury's ones with the talking sheep.

― Cathy (Cathy), Friday, 1 October 2004 13:50 (nineteen years ago) link

Me neither, Cathy. They do my head in. They are totally unfunny and meaningless.

― Penelope_111 (Penelope_111), Friday, 1 October 2004 13:58 (nineteen years ago) link

My flamate laughs a lot at the Co-op sheep too.

― Alba (Alba), Friday, 1 October 2004 14:28 (nineteen years ago) link

isn't it Woolworths?

― Brigadier Rainham Steele, Mrs (blueski), Friday, 1 October 2004 14:42 (nineteen years ago) link

I don't know, perhaps there are a lot of talking and singing sheep at the moment. Perhaps they're the latest monkeys. But the one I'm talking about it definitely Co-op. They're throwing all the GM products and additives out of the shop, with pigs. Actually, the pigs are all right.

― Alba (Alba), Friday, 1 October 2004 14:44 (nineteen years ago) link

That bacterial woman used to drink in the Phoenix a lot around the time when I was drinking in the Phoenix a lot and, for that matter, drinking a lot in the Phoenix

― Didoismus (Dada), Friday, 1 October 2004 14:46 (nineteen years ago) link

rock and roll pigs!

― Brigadier Rainham Steele, Mrs (blueski), Friday, 1 October 2004 14:47 (nineteen years ago) link

The Post Office one where the child-ants play at having road rage makes me lose the will to live.

― Adam Faithless (Adam Faithless), Friday, 1 October 2004 15:20 (nineteen years ago) link

The Red Bull ads have been the worst on TV for at least five years.

― Wooden (Wooden), Friday, 1 October 2004 15:22 (nineteen years ago) link

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