Elon Musk

I have absolutely gotten pulled over for doing this lol

we’ll just have to write new traffic laws to accommodate a weird billionaire pissbaby. I don’t think it will be hard.

xpost But what if *you* didn't roll through the stop, what if it was the car?
https://video-images.vice.com/articles/60c09917f74527009a124228/lede/1623235200851-christine-car-on-fire.jpeg?crop=1xw%3A1xh%3Bcenter%2Ccenter&resize=2000%3A*

xpost - I have a feeling Tesla's legal team is also having a rough morning when seeing their CEO tweet out that the cars are programmed to directly break the law in, afaiui, every state.

"lobbyist" is the new "narc"

well they know that because this is the reason for yet another recall xp

Just saying that the tweeting of it out as "no safety issue" is probably not helpful.

its only recently that tesla has been issuing recalls for software problems, which they were supposed to be doing all along

elon is lying in his tweet there the cars were programmed to roll though at up to 5+ mph, just a reflexively dishonest person

Does Elon's statement about the journalist amount to libel?

I know nothing about law, just think that it would be cool if it did.

I forget, what happened to the libel case of the guy he called a pedophile?

Musk won

One of the smartest moves by Elon Musk's defence was in introducing the concept of "JDart", an acronym to describe their client's conduct on Twitter in relation to the infamous "pedo guy" tweet.

A JDart, lawyer Alex Spiro explained, meant: a Joke that was badly received, therefore Deleted, with an Apology and then Responsive Tweets to move on from the matter. JDart.

It's clumsy, for sure, but it meant Mr Spiro could offer the jury here a degree of structure around what before seemed senseless: Mr Musk may have acted foolishly with the J, but he soon "darted", which is how you know he wasn't being serious about the allegation.

Expect the JDart "standard" to be applied again and again, not just in libel trials, but in any arena where social media behaviour is under scrutiny - a parachute for anyone who, in the heat of the moment, says something idiotic online.

Of course he won, he's a billionaire. He can do whatever the fuck he wants, including goosing the stocks of his own companies via tweets whenever its convenient.

Unless you are poor or marginalized, the age of consequences is over.

I had this dream or Elon Musk made it with a woman appeared as a golden shower and her babies were alien babies. This was either a dream or just something I thought about

Pretty sure that was his relationship with Grimes right there

A JDart, lawyer Alex Spiro explained, meant: a Joke that was badly received, therefore Deleted, with an Apology and then Responsive Tweets to move on from the matter.

Smart lawyer, stupid jury. A sensational lie will always outrun a lame apology. As for 'responsive tweets', they may as well be dropped into the Mariana Trench.

Yeah grimes alien 👽

your honor when I publicly admitted the cars were programmed to break the law I was just being "based"

the car learned it from you, dad!

SpaceX loses 40 satellites to geomagnetic storm a day after launch

SpaceX has lost dozens of satellites after they were hit by a geomagnetic storm a day after launch, causing them to fall from orbit and burn up...

Musk vs. The Sun, a battle royale

If I've learned anything from the film Geostorm, the only solution is to send Musk himself into space to repair the satellites, before he takes the fight to the sun itself.

He can definitely launch a private sun... competition breeds innovation

Neuralink trials going well

some elon musk reply guy is about to make "flowers for algernon" look like a success story pic.twitter.com/2YsRvc3EMj

— a non-suspicious guy you aren't worried about 😏 (@ChrisCaesar) February 10, 2022

Oh and

California is suing Elon Musk's Tesla, alleging it runs a "racially segregated" workplace and discriminates against Black employees.

Black workers report being concentrated in parts of its factory (one called "the plantation" by other workers) and hearing slurs up to 100x daily. pic.twitter.com/2vmD3oo13G

— AJ+ (@ajplus) February 10, 2022

why would a guy who grew in the apartheid ruling class do this

JFC @ that neuralink story. (Sadly?) I'm sure he could fill up some trials with his fanboys.

yeah the self-mutilating monkey is uh fucking wild

I hate this evil psychopath so much.

Yeah this is next level horrifying. Where’s PETA when you need them?

So whether the chip was supposed to kill them or not, it still doesn’t really work. https://t.co/GjPnqxo6uS

— Noah Garfinkel (@NoahGarfinkel) February 12, 2022

Musk removes mask and reveals reptilian face a la "V" miniseries

Then swallows a monkey whole.

he'd obv rather test on humans but the FDA can be so fickle

https://knowyourmeme.com/photos/1946074-elon-musk

ELON has too much power. I miss pre-elon times

congrats!

https://www.cnn.com/2022/03/11/entertainment/grimes-elon-musk-second-child-intl-scli/index.html

there is nothing this dude loves more than having eight zillion children and tweeting his way through it

hectic week for everyone:

Grimes is dating leaker Chelsea Manning after Elon Musk breakup https://t.co/l0PmWDPskN pic.twitter.com/7a5TgyG02i

— Page Six (@PageSix) March 11, 2022

what in the hell

wow

A union built to last!

had never realized how much they look like each other.

edgy

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/FNz7FYdXIAYMxHN?format=jpg&name=small

What happened in 10 days? pic.twitter.com/1ePAo0w0nG

— David Weigel (@daveweigel) March 14, 2022

Too many politicians/corporations/media figures came out in support of Ukraine I guess

Like what the fuck is this. Dude is 50 years old

pic.twitter.com/Gw6xaw1u0N

— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) March 14, 2022

lmao that is extremely pathetic if the Chelsea Manning rumor is true

haha that’s it

"What I desperately, desperately need is for you to think that I’m cool and funny. I need this. Please give me that satisfaction." — @elonmusk https://t.co/otpfnBSMrj pic.twitter.com/O5Tg5ht5yZ

— The Onion (@TheOnion) March 24, 2022

translation: he got rejected from Berghain, life is alright sometimes

They wrote PEACE on the wall at Berghain! I refused enter.

— Elon Musk (@elonmusk) April 3, 2022