marketing of masculinity

ok quick searching indicates that I am not the first person to be confused by this, because the terms are pretty muddled already

Anyway the only time it occurs in my headspace is in Oklahoma!, where the surrey with the fringe on top has isinglass curtains

The Vice article is balderdash, but it is somewhat interesting that the founder feels the need to frame his business as a 21st century tech startup, when in fact it sounds like a specialty tea mail order company, which is fairly 19th century. And the dude is cynically honest when he admits that's how you drum up investors.

Pre-pandemic, Haagen Daz had a bunch of posters up in the downtown San Francisco BART station about how they were really a 'startup', even though it was founded in 1960

I feel like in orbit is otm in the “real men in upper midwest” etc like coffee black

but those people have adapted and changed what coffee means, like a standard coffee then was convenience store, work coffee pot, diner, etc

you hand my dad even like a starbucks black coffee (ignoring the over-roasted whatever) they’re like whoa wtf

I feel like “real” even meaning chain coffee was just a burst beyond standard american coffee overall and some just grimaced and said “this is man coffee now” and others just switched to drinking monster or w/e

on the other hand I would mainline the shittiest work drip coffee for some years. something with a pouch you put in the coffee maker instead of the filter/grounds. finally, they upgraded.. to a folger’s pouch.

my last days being regularly in the office I joined aero press club *shrug*

it's almost as if what is "masculine behavior" is completely arbitrary and entirely defined by insecurity.

― Nedlene Grendel as Basenji Holmo (map), Monday, November 22, 2021 4:47 PM (two days ago) bookmarkflaglink

So it occurred to me that wrt actual cowboys it probably wasn't totally arbitrary or defined by insecurity, but was actually a necessity of the trail, i.e you literally couldn't have milk (or many other comforts/luxuries) so you had to be "tough" in the sense of being able to live without them and endure difficult conditions. But most American masculinity is like 3-5 steps removed from being an actual cowboy by now. P sure the air conditioning in that new Ram TRX works just fine, and the milk at the gas mart is free with the coffee.

most actual cowboys were latino or black

spanish and mexican vaqueros were the original cowboys. norte americanos just copied their methods.

double post

makes me sick to my stomach tbh

haters will say it's* fakehttps://t.co/6zw1eCC6ko

it: dog balls

— Kevin H Jingle Bell 🔔🔔🔔 (@KevinHBell) December 29, 2021

The clunking problem

There was a problem, however. The original Neuticles were made of a hard plastic-like material. Customers complained their dogs made a “clunking” sound when they walked or sat down. “That was an issue that we endured for three years until some genius, God bless him wherever he was, invented solid silicone,” Miller says.

DJP 1973-2021
Cause of death: involuntarily ejecting lungs through mouth do to sudden, uncontrollable guffawing

*due

don't mind me, just correcting typos from the afterlife

fucking hell

taking your poor dog's troublemakers away and replacing them clanking balls of plastic - that is just hideous

When I asked for my lab to have big ol meaty clackers I didn't mean actual clackers.

https://m.media-amazon.com/images/I/61r6NGTTBvL._AC_SX425_.jpg

imagine going round to someone's house and asking what that clunking noise is and them replying "oh that's just my dog's ersatz testicles"

There is a human version of this, for those that have lost balls to cancer.

Miller went ahead and had Buck neutered, though he hated putting the puppy through the surgery. Afterward, Buck went to clean himself. “He loved to do that. The slurping noise that was so freaking obnoxious,” Miller says, mimicking a slurping hound sound. He’s convinced Buck noticed something was missing, and the dog looked back up at his master. “He was telling me, ‘They’re gone. What happened?’”

what happened? i am confused

https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/692/586/2e0.gif

imagine going round to someone's house and asking what that clunking noise is

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vs-2SRBxBI8

wha happen?!

imagining the fred willard dog riffing about his clackers every time he sits down

😬

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/FLLjfdIVQAIOuGW?format=jpg&name=small

Is that a glowing hot horseshoe on your jeans or are you just happy to buy everyday staples, trusted Filson standards?

Everyday staples, how do they work?

can I admit here that I like the Duluth Trading Company ads

well, you are in the right geographic region

i buy two nice workwear things and become saturated with 15 dipshit dude brand identities

I miss the workwear/big&tall clothing store that used to be here. Now it's all hipster shops that have flannel shirts and axe sharpening services

I wound up buying two things from Taylor Stitch last year and they were good (a flannel and a sweater), would buy from them again.

try not to let their recently acquired fashionability ruin intrinsically good and useful things for you. fashions pass on to other things, but intrinsic value won't.

I promise you are not prepared for Tucker's latest montage pic.twitter.com/8tdvYTW2cn

— nikki mccann ramírez (@NikkiMcR) April 16, 2022

most of you have probably already seen this, or seen reference to it in a little box on the side of your screen as you were scrolling somewhere else.

my question is, what is this?!

https://i.imgur.com/qag6FFh.png

it's a central image in the clip - is that supposed to be a guy receiving some sort of laser upgrade to his genitals? or is he supposed to be fucking the concept of computers?

and more importantly, where can i take a free test to check to see if i could benefit from genital enhancement?

Ball Tanning

We also now know what’s going on with the guy on the rock exposing his private parts to a wash of red light. He was tanning his balls. Carlson endorsed the practice in the special as one of several ways men can return themselves to testosterone-fueled dominance, which the special argues is necessary for society to “reestablish order” after collapse..

a Swanson heir private school educated coastal fop making 10 mil a year to tell the decent folk in the heartland that masculinity is on the endangered list is just the absolute funniest shit to me

That's not real, is it?

which thing? because holy shit, i'll believe pretty much anything these days

The ball tanning? It even has a rad name: "bromeopathic therapy"

Putting the 'bro' back in bromeopathy

The promo clip. That's gotta be fake.

No, pretty sure it's real

One of my friends got his taint scrubbed at a Korean spa. He still talks about it.

dudes rock

yeah, that's a real clip. that's the most watched tv news guy. it's fucking crazy. there are all these people out there who watch this guy who tells them to tan their balls

Well, Trump likes to rock some "YMCA" out on the stump, this is just a campier extension of that vibe

A manly ship, full of manly men

Maybe hovering your balls over a heating element until they're the color and texture of an NFL football feels good! There's only one way to know for sure. (You first.)

Shailene Woodley already trademarked genital tanning, dude’s just a copycat.

yeah this exposing your genitals to the sun or w/e is pretty old now, all the women’s “health” weirdos went through it and I would guess it’s now trickled through the yoga men and athletes married to “health” people to the beard oil set all the way to the macho gun men set and now to the boring conservative assholes

the journey of a raindrop, of tanning your balls