your terrible ideas

An app that beams whatever message you type into Joe Rogan s head.

Whatever.... message

A sitcom where every single joke in every single episode is a laboured pun on the name of the same semi-obscure celebrity.
At the conclusion of the series, the celebrity appears as themselves in a dramatic "very special episode", where their fictional persona is revealed as a child molester.

lol

a serial killer is hacking into company databases containing employee vaccine card scans. the maniac is targeting people who received Pfizer lot #666. the killer believes the death of these individuals will save the world from government overreach. as the killer pursues each victim, they scream "THAT WAS MY PRIVATE MEDICAL DATA!"

disambiguation request: is this a terrible idea for a movie or a terrible idea for real life?

snl sketch w/ kevin james as host

a Vinyl subscription service, but what you don't tell people is when they sign up, you just literally mail them vinyl products, not necessarily records. like vinyl dresses, water pipes, electrical wire, PVC, etc

yes but would start by sending them actual records until they finish their trial period, then straight in with the old floor tiles the next month

lol

"This month's selection: Wire - Pink Flag" -- in package is some vinyl wire and a pink flag made of vinyl.

just random lengths of beige vinyl siding

a classic piece of original 70s vinyl

Could also do a "Record Club" but you just get a random property record, medical record, etc.

Or sell autographed band memorabilia and then sign it yourself.

"I didn't say 'who' autographed it"

there's got to be some way of combining NFTs and MLM

and vinyl

lol love this.
"Foreign films and vinyl" - if you're in the uk you get Freddie Got Fingered and some disposable gloves

How about a vinyl of the month club but every month it's just the next Tom Jones record in sequence

"I have a good feeling this month. This is my...*grunt*...12th unboxing and, well....we know what happened on the previous 11. Those Youtubes have been taken down due to bad memories. But I've done the calculations in my head, and it's not poss....ok I don't want to say it's "im"-possible, but it's extremely unlikely that they'll send me another record by....him. Why I received 11 others - there are a lot of working theories, but the most popular one amongst experts is that my vibe settings were so niche, that I kept getting To-....I'm sorry, 'his' records. I've fixed my vibes, I've set them so far away from that sound that there's just no way, no way in he-.....No. oh god. oh god no. THEY FUCKED ME AGAIN! 'Help Yourself'? "HELP YOURSELF?" This isn't even GOOD Tom Jones! No, fuck you, I'm saying his name because I'm angry. They won't get away with this. They can't get away with this....I....I...cut the camera. I said...cut the fucking camera!"

Tom Jones in sequins

To really rub it in, each box would include one of those overenthusiastic "personal notes" from the founders, and starting with the second one, each one would say "Hey man, so glad you're grooving to all the tunes we've been sending. We thought you'd enjoy this one because you previously purchased [list of prior Tom Jones record(s) received ]. Hope you dig it, bro!"

lol

Oh man, starting a subscription box service where I send people random garbage I don't want a curated selection of cultural objects from my personal collection would be such a great grift way to share my interests with like-minded individuals.

So you'd be sending them....old lunch?

But the customers, they are meant to think it is NEW lunch

Either way, I will be handing them their lunch.

New-To-You Lunch

Meet the new lunch, same as the old lunch.

Just whipped up the neologism 'LunchBox' for my new service, can't believe no one else was using it.

All you need is lunch

So, like, what about a really big box store where the sign says "The Russian Nesting Doll Store."

So you go inside, and inside there's a slightly smaller store.

So you go inside THAT store, and....

Whenever getting asked what he's going as for the office Halloween party, telling co-workers he's dressing up as Al Jolson.

People either freeze in disgust or walk away or beg him to reconsider. "Nah, it's a real easy costume. All I'm gonna do is –"

Finally the big moment. Everyone makes their grand entrance and then here comes... Al Jolson.

https://i.imgur.com/OWzqU2d.jpg

ABBA-themed porn titled Waterlewd.

[boink]ing Me, [boink]ing You

Take a [bleep] on Me

Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! A [slide whistle, double bike horn honk] After Midnight

Having the (bleep) of your life

a machine that lets you sleep for the rest of your life, and then you're connected to a dream network with other people doing the permasleep and you can connect with them in various locations in your dream state and make friends and while you're in this state you're fed with like Robocop's food and stuff.

A concept album based on Empson’s Seven Types of Ambiguity (a track per ambiguity)

a machine that lets you sleep for the rest of your life, and then you're connected to a dream network with other people doing the permasleep and you can connect with them in various locations in your dream state and make friends and while you're in this state you're fed with like Robocop's food and stuff.

― Cool Im An Situation (Neanderthal), Wednesday, 17 November 2021 20:23 (two days ago) bookmarkflaglink

This is the popular 90s sci-Fi movie The Matrix, yes?

What's The Matrix?

That reminds me of the cool, fun idea I had about the time travelling machine that goes back to punish you if you don't invent it.

every gig, the time machine at your merch table.

I always thought Empson should have called the book A Bunch of Types of Ambiguity

hahaha

reminds me of a long-ago friend's mishearing of "You're So Vain" as "You're So Vague." It's possible this song is about you...

A sneakerhead offshoot trend where sneakers are collected for comfort rather than style or rarity, and the most prized kicks are the consensus most comfortable ones.

I feel like there would be a lot of opportunity for unboxing youtube videos where the "cushbeasts" (as they would be called) slip their feet into the shoes and wax about how cozy and comfy they are.

Posting "too soon" to all Macy's pix appearing in my feed tomorrow.

Metallica becomes the federal government