your terrible ideas

actually, sometimes i do wget the url and then view resulting source.

don't tell me my terrible idea already exists!

How about like spam-me.com, where we put you directly in touch with Nigerian princes so you no longer have to wait for your step-uncle to forward you an email chain filled with mystery attachments? By inputting as much personal information into our patented database as humanly possible, we guarantee that your identity absolutely will be stolen within 24 hours.

Shit, given the state of the world these days, you'd probably have a million new sign-ups within the first 24 hours.

everybody should be offered free, subsidized kung-fu lessons, and there should be nationally sponsored kung fu tournaments that you can enter to win a million dollars.

Do you mean kung fu like this?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tJYoAS76gag

Or like this?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y0wsMoZwdx8

both! the more tournaments teh better, encourage all styles

A reboot of 2001 that is done in the style of a circa 2001 comedic action thriller and starring Will Smith. The entire purpose of this in my mind is as a vehicle for Will Smith to deliver the line “Aw HAL nah!”

Reminds of the gag script someone wrote where Dave and Frank speak in actual 2001 slang: "Dave, HAL's been acting real sketch lately..."

spacewalk scene presumably soundtracked by All Star

i am loving this terrible idea, merging man alive's irl lol with the script pplains referenced

spacewalk scene presumably soundtracked by All Star

― Lavator Shemmelpennick, Wednesday, October 13, 2021 9:31 AM (twenty-nine minutes ago) bookmarkflaglink

Walking on the Sun, surely?

might as well

FOUND IT.

I'm rewriting the dialogue in 2001: A Space Odyssey to more accurately reflect the period it's set in pic.twitter.com/ChAdhtgTQf

— Brooks Otterlake (@i_zzzzzz) April 25, 2016

"You're toast, monolith!"

Mike Myers as Michael Myers

Yes but instead of putting him in a mask they use horrifying Cat in the Hat-esque prosthetics to make Mike Myers' actual face look like a bleached Captain Kirk.

for the next series of Drag Race UK, one of the judges should be an old homophobic Mary Whitehouse type who is shocked and appalled by everything but is also fascinated and unable to look away.

a movie where all the interesting stuff happens in the distant background of scenes rather than the people acting in the foreground - which could in itself be a completely different storyline.

the star wars prequels already exist tho

oof

a movie where all the interesting stuff happens in the distant background of scenes rather than the people acting in the foreground - which could in itself be a completely different storyline.

I'm pretty sure I posted about this somewhere on this board, but my idea for a Marvel movie was some domestic drama where occasionally you would see a television in the background with news reports of a huge superhero fight currently ongoing

A reboot of 2001 that is done in the style of a circa 2001 comedic action thriller and starring Will Smith. The entire purpose of this in my mind is as a vehicle for Will Smith to deliver the line “Aw HAL nah!”

― longtime caller, first time listener (man alive), Tuesday, October 12, 2021 11:30 PM (one week ago) bookmarkflaglink

FWIW, I think this should happen as HAL tries to lock him out, and after delivering the line he kicks in the pod bay doors and then hits HAL with a right cross, followed by a knee to the gut, and then an over the shoulder throw finishing off HAL. The plot of the movie is entirely changed and Will Smith returns home a hero, having unknowingly also foiled humanity's psychedelic rebirth or whatever the fuck happens at the end of that film.

acceptable only if, on arrival back home, he is greeted by the President saying "Welcome to Earth."

Will Smith returns home a hero, having unknowingly also foiled humanity's psychedelic rebirth or whatever the fuck happens at the end of that film.

Hahaha.

"We came! We saw! We kicked that Starchild's ass..."

Invent and market a meat-based tofu substitute. Call it either Fauxfu or Nofu.

just a brick of fatback

An app that beams whatever message you type into Joe Rogan s head.

Whatever.... message

A sitcom where every single joke in every single episode is a laboured pun on the name of the same semi-obscure celebrity.
At the conclusion of the series, the celebrity appears as themselves in a dramatic "very special episode", where their fictional persona is revealed as a child molester.

lol

a serial killer is hacking into company databases containing employee vaccine card scans. the maniac is targeting people who received Pfizer lot #666. the killer believes the death of these individuals will save the world from government overreach. as the killer pursues each victim, they scream "THAT WAS MY PRIVATE MEDICAL DATA!"

disambiguation request: is this a terrible idea for a movie or a terrible idea for real life?

snl sketch w/ kevin james as host

a Vinyl subscription service, but what you don't tell people is when they sign up, you just literally mail them vinyl products, not necessarily records. like vinyl dresses, water pipes, electrical wire, PVC, etc

yes but would start by sending them actual records until they finish their trial period, then straight in with the old floor tiles the next month

lol

"This month's selection: Wire - Pink Flag" -- in package is some vinyl wire and a pink flag made of vinyl.

just random lengths of beige vinyl siding

a classic piece of original 70s vinyl

Could also do a "Record Club" but you just get a random property record, medical record, etc.

Or sell autographed band memorabilia and then sign it yourself.

"I didn't say 'who' autographed it"

there's got to be some way of combining NFTs and MLM

and vinyl

lol love this.
"Foreign films and vinyl" - if you're in the uk you get Freddie Got Fingered and some disposable gloves

How about a vinyl of the month club but every month it's just the next Tom Jones record in sequence

"I have a good feeling this month. This is my...*grunt*...12th unboxing and, well....we know what happened on the previous 11. Those Youtubes have been taken down due to bad memories. But I've done the calculations in my head, and it's not poss....ok I don't want to say it's "im"-possible, but it's extremely unlikely that they'll send me another record by....him. Why I received 11 others - there are a lot of working theories, but the most popular one amongst experts is that my vibe settings were so niche, that I kept getting To-....I'm sorry, 'his' records. I've fixed my vibes, I've set them so far away from that sound that there's just no way, no way in he-.....No. oh god. oh god no. THEY FUCKED ME AGAIN! 'Help Yourself'? "HELP YOURSELF?" This isn't even GOOD Tom Jones! No, fuck you, I'm saying his name because I'm angry. They won't get away with this. They can't get away with this....I....I...cut the camera. I said...cut the fucking camera!"

Tom Jones in sequins

To really rub it in, each box would include one of those overenthusiastic "personal notes" from the founders, and starting with the second one, each one would say "Hey man, so glad you're grooving to all the tunes we've been sending. We thought you'd enjoy this one because you previously purchased [list of prior Tom Jones record(s) received ]. Hope you dig it, bro!"

lol

Oh man, starting a subscription box service where I send people random garbage I don't want a curated selection of cultural objects from my personal collection would be such a great grift way to share my interests with like-minded individuals.

So you'd be sending them....old lunch?