Grand Theft Auto IV -- It might feature crime and prostitutes.

I like deathmatch and race and gta race and cops n crooks.

Race really does deliver a top notch racing game - ok generally in a game of 16 players, 10 of them are idiot n00bs who pile into the first corner withotu braking and do their best to fuck it up for everyone else, but if you hang back and avoid the carnage, or manage to get out in front, then you generally end up having a good race with the 6 players who can actually drive.

GTA race is a bit like wipeout, ie racing with guns, but in wipeout you can't get out of your car, jump into a bus to create a roadblock, collect a rocket launcher, and camp by your roadblock, destroying everyone as they try to get past.

Cops n crooks - can be bad or good depending who you play with (really this applies to all the modes) but when it's good it's very very good; there's a million different ways each game could turn out, from clinically executed takedowns to hilarious random carnage.

I'm only posting on here cos the controller is out of juice.

Didn't I tell you to get a 360 instead of a PS3? DIDN'T I??

i may be getting one also

Pushing people in front of trains wasn't as cool as I thought it'd be.

First time I did this the guy dragged himself to his feet and staggered off down the tracks, so when the train actually left the platform it knocked him off the bridge at ridiculous speed and on to the bonnet of a taxi on the road below

Shooting taxi drivers through their windshield at the end of your journey and taking your money back is the new Hooker Trick, but if their foot gets jammed on the accelerator you end up getting carried fifty feet down the road by a constant-horn-blaring death wagon and smashed to pieces up against a hot dog stand or some shit

cops n crooks = best multiplayer.

I'm slowly making my way through the early missions and came across my first "Choose Your Own Adventure" ending.

That fucker better not come back after me like the German soldier in Saving Private Ryan.

My housemate chose to kill Dwayne instead of Playboy X. It's a good choice if you don't want to have another friend to hang out with, but Dwayne is my favorite dude.

SPOILER ABOVE

MORE RELATED TO ABOVE SPOILER i killed playboy x but goddamn dwayne is such a whiny bitch that i wish i iced him instead

I love how much of a drag he is. Brucie and Roman are too perky.

this is great, please keep with spoiler-type stuff, because after I "dealt" with Vlad I felt kinda icky and put the game down for a few days. I'm a gentle soul who can handle the anonymous slaughter just fine (yeah I know) but when it's face to face, I get pretty overwhelmed. So I want to get re-excited about the single player (multi still awesome).

MORE RELATED TO ABOVE SPOILER i killed playboy x but goddamn dwayne is such a whiny bitch that i wish i iced him instead

OTM, even if it means losing a safehouse. "Waaaa! I had all my friends killed and now I've got no one to go bowling with!" And he had the nerve to tell me "well YOU were the one who wanted to go bowling" when I cut the game short.

The Snow Storm mission is doing my head in.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1z9oJT4cdhA

OH WHEN WILL MY SORNY KARD ARRIVE IN THE MAIL.

Choosing Dwayne gets you some familiar threads if you check the wardrobe.

Killed Dwayne and I feel bad.

Agh, and now there's an e-mail from Dwayne wanting to hang out. so eerie and sad.

Playboy was the aggressor, not Dwayne.

My friend had the controller. I was all "OLD SKOOL" and he was all "$$$".

Got 25000 for it, which is something. But Playboy was all "i don't ever want to see you again. you cold. you need to live for something."

The money won't seem worth it after the highly lucrative bank mission.

?What do you mean? Do I need Dwayne for that or is it just a massive payday?

kerching!

it only recently occured to me how expensive hospital visits are, oops.

Dwayne gets on my nerves, but he's stopped ringing me now. I tried getting in touch but he was all "sob sob ring me more often bye". Same with packies sister kate but her phone just keeps giving me an engaged tone.

i have to deal with this stoopid mind game shit in real life, why should i suffer it in my favourite games !!?

i've realised why most of the sub standard cars handle real shitty, it's so the high performance cars feel much much sublime. I think my favourite is the Comet but I love driving all the fast cars.

Comet, is that the Porsche? Man I dumped that shit in multiplayer, floating all over the shop, never all four wheels on the ground at once. Infernus 4 life, just cause it is goddamned fast. Banshee used to be my fave, but with the new realistic physics it seems a bit meh.

i have to deal with this stoopid mind game shit in real life, why should i suffer it in my favourite games !!?

this! otm! qft! ^!

When i received my Infernus reward it was the first time I'd driven one, another reason why I've left the multiplayer alone for now so that I don't spoil some of the stuff that becomes available to you. I was so chuffed I drove that thing so carefully back to my safehouse, I still haven't seen another one on the roads.

altho i'm very partial to the Trans-Am looking car

There are way too many spoilers in this thread. What the hell, guys.

Also sniping helicopter pilots is officially the best thing ever in this game.

Ah these threads always get spoiler-tastic, I never read them unless or until I've got far enough in the game.

I wonder if people on multiplayer without microphones know why they get kicked, or people leave games they're in, or randomly start trying to shoot them in the head and blow them up. IT'S BECAUSE YOU'RE ACTING LIKE A PRICK AND CAN'T EVEN HEAR INSTRUCTIONS LET ALONE FOLLOW THEM. Not that 90% of people with mics aren't assholes or simpletons too.

The Infernus has superseded the Banshee as the car of choice this time around...

Never felt the love for the Banshee, slips and slides all over the place.
Was always a Cheetah fan, the ferrari this time round is still amazing.

Was thinking how cool a Vice City game would be on the new consoles.

had terrible dream last night that me and my mates had just done a bank job, but it was the second job we'd done and so most of the dream was just us lot shitting ourselves waiting for one us to panic and get sprung by the cops.

Took three tries for the bank job. Not counting the one where I blew up the car before we even got there, killing Michael. My driving does get me into trouble. I called up Kate for a date and found a bike to get there - I love bikes and try to maintain a huge collection outside the safehouses - but the police got in the way and I came off the bike, and off the bridge I was on, landing in the river. So I called kate to cancel, found a car, and rightway arranged another date, man I'm smooth. Then twice nearly flipped the car after I'd picked her up.

man that *is* smooth, I gave up on kate ages ago after she dissed my clothing choice.

and has anyone dated Carmen yet? she's supposed to administer health boosts over the phone to me but it doesn't seem to work.

Should I get this game if my wife is sort of interested in seeing it?

your wife's enthusiasm will probably take her past the casual violence but will only last until the first time you go to the strip club or have sex.

Actually, it's much more likely she will get bored if you end up having to do the exact same thing over and over again than that she will be offended/turned off by explicit sexual content.

I end up doing Michelle again and again, but I guess I don't have to. So: not boring.

sexual content on the game, like with any other video game, is less offensive and more crepey. i would be embarrassed by playing through the sexual scenes with a ladyfriend because it's so nerdy and weird. but then i am a britishes and we embarrass easily.

never a dull moment, definitely won't get bored.

My wife watches me play and considers it her evening entertainment.

raise @ work means I think I go buy!

fuck there's some heavy explosions in this fine game!

The fire is greatly improved.

and has anyone dated Carmen yet?

OMG OPTIONAL DATING QUEST SPOILAHS

yeah, once you get the health boosts, you call her and select "health boost," she and niko have a funny conversation, then you stand there and your health SLOWLY fills up (about 30sec to 100%) but if you take damage, it stops refilling.

even better though when you date kiki enough, you can get her to make the cops fuck off of you. except i am literally scared of her because she like crazy in love w/ niko.

my friend took Kiki to the comedy club and she was so pumped. But friend got tired of the comedy stylings of Katt Williams and ended the gig, and Kiki was NOT PLEASED.

I am in an argument about GTA and violence and the demise of civilization. Someone is telling me that you can rape people in GTA. Is this true?

No, I think you're thinking of Mass Effect.

you're thinking of smash brothers.

Sorry, I had to type "Is this true?" as she was watching over my shoulder. I was planning to be like WTF

Have you noticed in the game though that most of the time even when you succesfully 'wipe' someone in a mission out, they're not always dead? I've seen bad guys just get up and wander off 'stage'.
Is this Rockstar's attempt to 'soften' things up slightly?

yeah, once you get the health boosts, you call her and select "health boost," she and niko have a funny conversation, then you stand there and your health SLOWLY fills up (about 30sec to 100%) but if you take damage, it stops refilling.

Nope, still getting no health increase even after the phone conversation. Is broken i think.

do you think perhaps i should stay perfectly still for it to work?

so finished the hitman missions and the most wanted. what did i get for them? fuck all. Rewards are pitiful in this version.