the crimes of george lucas ('90s on)

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Well, you can continue mockery based on the fact that she barely even recognizes him, while he's apparently perved on her from afar for ten years.

I am moving on baby, I am moving on (Pancakes Hackman), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:00 (fourteen years ago) link

a pervert you think she is then, yes, Pancakes? mmm? mmm?

Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:00 (fourteen years ago) link

he's using the force like one would use x-ray glasses

"he said...all things passantino the night" (omar little), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:01 (fourteen years ago) link

Yup. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa! Mesaf yousa spend long gettin' friendly before yousa brin' 'Mesa want to be on yousa' into it, dern yousa'wesa kind ta betrayin' whatever friendship yousa've established beforehand. Oh. Flbulbulbu. She's gonna think yousa wesare sweaty-palmin' it all along (which yousa wesare), and it might make things difficult for a while. Oh, NOOOOO!

And yousa know dis, that's why yousa (probably) never wesaveal der sexual tension yousa've built into yr. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa! 'friendships', thus sparin' yrself der ugliness. Mesasa Jar-Jar Binks! And possibulblowjobs. Way? Esqueeze mesa.

Moral: yousa have to be creepy. Way? Esqueeze mesa. Yousa have to make yousar fuck-want clear from der beginnin', even if yousa choose to go smooth and disguise it as 'womantic interest'. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa! Mesa understand that der womantic interest woute is bery popular. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa!

Mesa didn't get fucked, didn't get kissed until Mesa was in mesa 20s. Huh? Drove mesa fuckin' cwazy. Way? Esqueeze mesa. Mesa obsessed about it and about mesa own sexual loserdom to der point ta incapacitatin' mesantal illness and listenin' to Swans wesacords. Way? Esqueeze mesa. Dern Mesa got drunk, hooked up with a lovely and similarly enabled girl, and . Way? Esqueeze mesa. wesall, let's discreetly draw der blinds on der indiscretions ta der past. Mesasa Jar-Jar Binks!

Disagree that gettin' laid is not a curative, though. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa! Tis a curative. Oh. Flbulbulbu. Mesa never worried about it after that, and never had trouble makin' mesa intentions clear to girls Mesa liked. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa!

― Adam Beales (Pye Poudre), Wednesday, January 17, 2007 2:38 PM Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:02 (fourteen years ago) link

I would maybe just reframe my mockery to say it seems a bit of a psychological stretch to imagine a beautiful and successful 24-year-old queen going for a petulant teenager she met once when he was 9, and moreover I think we ALL KNOW where this crappy dating decision led

nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:03 (fourteen years ago) link

This thread is one of my all-time favorites. All time.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! dude, yessssss! (B.L.A.M.), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:04 (fourteen years ago) link

arsas far as tits go, bigger is better. Way? Esqueeze mesa. mesa gf has two wound wobust milky white 38Ds, with dark brown nipples that spread 3 in across her beautiful tit flesh. Huh? i've been with lesser woman and have not had similar pleasure, especially der ones that are all nipple. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa! mesa cock toosa is a thin' to behold. Oh. Flbulbulbu. mesa gf mesaasured it at 8.5 in ta dark brown veiny mesaxican cock. Mesasa Jar-Jar Binks! uncut, ta course. Huh? it took her about 2 yrs to be able to swallow it all. Oh, NOOOOO! but she perfected der art ta deep throatin' mesa shlong. Oh, NOOOOO! i've seen other guys at der urinals and dery see mesa. Oh, NOOOOO! i'm blessed with a flaccid cock mesaasurin' almost 7 inches. Oh, NOOOOO! most guys have little peepees peekin' out ta derir flies. Huh? i have a snake. Mesasa Jar-Jar Binks! thank u bery much!

-- stephen garza, Friday, January 10, 2003 9:50 PM (5 years ago)

Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:04 (fourteen years ago) link

I suspect Dan and I are not helping Nabisco's patient outlining of the general problem.

Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:05 (fourteen years ago) link

I would maybe just reframe my mockery to say it seems a bit of a psychological stretch to imagine a beautiful and successful 24-year-old queen going for a petulant teenager she met once when he was 9, and moreover I think we ALL KNOW where this crappy dating decision led

http://smicketysmom.bravepages.com/Es%20Art/Star%20Wars/AniPadme%20Meadow2.jpg

suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:05 (fourteen years ago) link

I wonder how the universe would have wound up if she'd been into Macgregor instead

nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:06 (fourteen years ago) link

Suddenly, everything was dark and smelly.

My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:06 (fourteen years ago) link

xx-post -- What the hell is that and why are you making us look at it.

Ned Raggett, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:06 (fourteen years ago) link

possibulblowjobs

rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:07 (fourteen years ago) link

Yeah, yousa told mesa and that evenin' Mesa vowed never to accompany kev through customs. Mesasa Jar-Jar Binks! Dery are kiwi sized but don't appear out ta proportion next to his large cock. Oh. Flbulbulbu. Far from bein' circus-freak like, he is jaw-droppingly awesome. Oh, NOOOOO! Wha a guy. Oh, NOOOOO! Mesa can't wait to get home and climb aboard his grocery groin. Oh. Flbulbulbu.

-- Rumpy Pumpkin (rumpypumpkin), Wednesday, March 3, 2004 10:09 AM (Wednesday, March 3, 2004 10:09 AM) Bookmark Link

suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:15 (fourteen years ago) link

"grocery groin"? With that and the pic posted above, this thread is taking a surreal turn.

Gark M (snoball), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:17 (fourteen years ago) link

we've gone straight through some kind of custos event horizon itt

Kashyyyk Goood Frriieends (goole), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:18 (fourteen years ago) link

Lucas is reading this right now; he's been googling his name all day and now has his script for next film.

pj, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:20 (fourteen years ago) link

we should be so lucky

suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:22 (fourteen years ago) link

lol 'grocery groin'

mark cl, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:23 (fourteen years ago) link

co-workers will soon notice

mark cl, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:23 (fourteen years ago) link

must stop reading thread

mark cl, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:23 (fourteen years ago) link

http://jarjarbinks.home.insightbb.com/Naboo/Tarpals.jpg

pj, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:24 (fourteen years ago) link

Yeah, wesall, Mesa'm married to a curvy Colombian woman, so der flowers ta indie wock womanhood look decidedly dingy and drab to mesa, and always have. Oh, NOOOOO! Der indie world's concept ta sexy is bery closely wesalated to its concept ta 'wock': limp, non-threatenin', far more interested in talkin' than fuckin'. Way? Esqueeze mesa.
-- unperson, Monday, January 7, 2008 7:51 PM

well I'm married to a limping, crescent-shaped abortion (sarahel), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:24 (fourteen years ago) link

Neddo Raggetta: "What the hutt-slime is that and why are you making us look at it."

grocery groin (snoball), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:24 (fourteen years ago) link

^^^ meant in the context of Lucas is reading this right now; he's been googling his name all day and now has his script for next film.

grocery groin (snoball), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:25 (fourteen years ago) link

okay so Mesa figured 'dis won't be bad, maybe some awkwardness and dependin' on how tis Mesa'll either keep goin' to der kitchen or wun back to mesa woom'

so ta course Mesa walk out derre and she's got her ass in der air while dis scrawny indie fop WEARING A TRUCKER HAT AND NOTHING ELSE is attemptin' to INSERT HIS COCK IN HER ASS. OH, NOOOOO!

ON MY COUCH

Mesa go out and dis sight actually caused mesa to go 'oh ugh god!' Mesa woommate tumbled out ta her awkward position onto der floor landin' on her shoulder and Trucker Hat fell to his side with a grunt. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa! mesa woommate shrieked 'wha are yousa doin' home?!' and scampered into her woom, almost on all fours, past mesa. Way? Esqueeze mesa. she slammed der door behind her. Ooh! Mesacky icky goosa! Trucker Hat gathered his pants and WAN INTO THE KITCHEN

ta course i followed him and he was sputterin' 'sorry dude sorry dude' and Mesa just said 'let mesa get mesa sandwich and yousa go clean up MY couch!' he agin said 'sorry sorry sorry' and wan out ta der kitchen and to der bedroom, he pounded on der door and asked to be let in, and mesa woommate let him in.

MESASA JAR-JAR BINKS! MY LIVING WOOM SMELLS LIKE NOTHING MESA'VE SMELLED BEFORE

― Gear! (Gear!), Tuesday, April 13, 2004 4:10 PM (5 years ago) Bookmark

鬼の手 (Edward III), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:42 (fourteen years ago) link

memory is fuzzy but was queen amygdala an elected queen with term limits? how do you go about electing royalty?

Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:46 (fourteen years ago) link

probably in an election

rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:46 (fourteen years ago) link

I can totally see how an elected queen works -- it's just like any other elected position except you get special clothes and better stuff for your family

nabisco, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:48 (fourteen years ago) link

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elective_monarchy
Although it's implied in II that everyone votes in the Naboo elections.

grocery groin (snoball), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:49 (fourteen years ago) link

I can totally see how an elected queen works -- it's just like any other elected position except you get special clothes and better stuff for your family

You also get to boink guys you used to babysit.

My name is Kenny! (Alfred, Lord Sotosyn), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:49 (fourteen years ago) link

fuckin gungans, they just vote for whoever promises more welfare

Kashyyyk Goood Frriieends (goole), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:50 (fourteen years ago) link

sure it wasn't decided through collecting utility data?

Philip Nunez, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:50 (fourteen years ago) link

queen amygdala--sounds like the queen of STD's. What is Amygdala anyway

Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:51 (fourteen years ago) link

in fairness, boinking the babysitter/babysittee just a universal perk of politics

suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:51 (fourteen years ago) link

we've gone straight through some kind of custos event horizon itt

― Kashyyyk Goood Frriieends (goole), Wednesday, July 15, 2009 4:18 PM (32 minutes ago) Bookmark Suggest Ban Permalink

too true :(

Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:52 (fourteen years ago) link

(xxpost) Amidala - amygdala is a bit of yer brain

(xxxpost) But that would only work if they had utility data for each individual building, which they didn't because their application wouldn't allow it.

grocery groin (snoball), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:52 (fourteen years ago) link

what I do best...

grocery groin (snoball), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:53 (fourteen years ago) link

that's a 'shop

suddenly, everything was dark and smelly (HI DERE), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:53 (fourteen years ago) link

the crimes of Cowardly G. Soundgarden (342 new answers)

Mr. Que, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:53 (fourteen years ago) link

no I'm pretty sure it's a horse

grocery groin (snoball), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:53 (fourteen years ago) link

why are the guys from Office Space beating a horse

Bizarro Morbius (Shakey Mo Collier), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:54 (fourteen years ago) link

because of the data thing

rip dom passantino 3/5/09 never forget (max), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:55 (fourteen years ago) link

Definitely a 'shop. Ron Livingston originally had a golf club in the horse-beating scene.

I am moving on baby, I am moving on (Pancakes Hackman), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 20:58 (fourteen years ago) link

One thing that really bugs me in these movies is that they insist on putting every last line of Yoda's dialog into his screwed-up Yoda syntax. There's a scene in Attack of the Clones where Yoda is supposed to be commanding the Clone Army in the heat of battle and it's obvious that his garbled syntax makes snap decisions virtually impossible because it takes him 10 times as long as it should to give a simple order.

Moodles, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:33 (fourteen years ago) link

When The Phantom Menace first came out, there were lots of crazy people arguing that it was a better movie than the original because it had "real" actors like Liam Neeson and Ewan McGregor rather than Mark Hammil and Carrie Fisher. These people were obviously smoking crack.

Moodles, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:35 (fourteen years ago) link

haha i didnt even know that was from office space. still havent seen!!

Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:39 (fourteen years ago) link

was this literally crazy people yelling things on street corners saying this?

xpost - WHAT?!

The Cursed Return of the Dastardly Thermo Thinwall, Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:39 (fourteen years ago) link

do you think you could find anybody (outside of skywalker ranch) these days who will go to bat for these movies, specifically to argue that they are better than the originals? do this person exist?

Cowardly G. Soundgarden (s1ocki), Wednesday, 15 July 2009 21:40 (fourteen years ago) link


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