Free as a Dodo: UK Politics Welcomes 2021

A member of the Jersey Militia reenactment group was seen firing on the French boats with a musket from Elizabeth Castle this morning.

It's after the flotilla of French fishermen who blockaded Jersey's main harbour returned to open water.https://t.co/0nY4Kja6uw pic.twitter.com/rQQ4yPHvxd

— ITV News Channel TV (@ITVChannelTV) May 6, 2021

Jersey was much easier in 1940!

Nazis have always been more popular with the Daily Mail than French fishermen tbf.

Don't just clap for our key workers, vote for them. Vote Labour today 🌹 pic.twitter.com/nDJ4mnIrLG

— Luke Pollard MP (@LukePollard) May 6, 2021

Oh the ironing

Choosing to interpret that as a subtly implied policy shift towards lopping the head off a bastard bobby.

Meanwhile Baldick delivers

Two days before the local election results, and already the corbynista rump are gleefully revelling in the possibility of a tough night for Labour, oblivious to the fact that they created the carnage the Party is doing its best to reverse. https://t.co/kLxKptwkos

— Tony Robinson (@Tony_Robinson) May 5, 2021

drinking endless pints, jizzing over flags, circumventing party democracy to parachute unpopular losers into safe seats, abstaining on spycops bill, offering nurses derisory pay rises - yes "reversing the carnage" is the most arcane of the dark arts that is beyond the comprehension of most, but New-Labour luvvies really do get it though.

Tories on the ground in Hartlepool say there is an "incredible response" on the doorstep. One adds: "Looking right now like a big big victory of maybe several thousand votes."

— Kate Ferguson (@kateferguson4) May 6, 2021

Damn Corbyn, will Labour ever be rid of his hateful legacy?

maybe next century, idk

even though he's a polprof melt, David Edgerton is good and gets that "success" is getting as many supporters on board as possible - yes in a fptp system you might get some bruising results - BUT IT GIVES YOU A FUCKING BASE TO BUILD ON!

Labour source: “These were always going to be tough elections for Labour. Keir has always been honest about the mountain we must climb to rebuild trust to win the next general election.”

— Sienna Rodgers (@siennamarla) May 6, 2021

They will keep wasting time chasing the votes of racists that will never vote for them

Start from 25% national vote share and negotiate up from there.

It really does sound like they’ve given up on Hartlepool already.

They will keep wasting time chasing the votes of racists that will never vote for them

lol

Ooooooh a shadow cabinet shakeup? Dodds out, Cooper in🤞

— Citizen of Everywhere #FBPE 🇪🇺 (@CznOfEverywhere) May 6, 2021

No shortage of other rivals there too.

I’ve waited until the polls have closed to say that @Keir_Starmer has refused to sign Unite’s letter demanding an end to fire & rehire.

It says so much. Disgraceful.

Show some passion. Talk for workers. It’s pathetic.

— Howard Beckett (@BeckettUnite) May 6, 2021

Cooper had a very good record at DWP - if you'd call a "good record" directly causing thousands of disabled people to end up dead. absolute fucking scum.

"Keir has always been honest"

remind me again of how many of the pledges this hollow facile piece of fucking shit shortarsed fucking clown actually didn't renege on within weeks of winning the leadership election again

Oh this thread though

4/ I’m told by Labour sources that the decision to press ahead with the by-election was done by Jenny (now Baroness) Chapman, the top political advisor to Keir Starmer.

She knows the Tees area as previously MP for Darlington for 9 years until 2019.

— Sam Coates Sky (@SamCoatesSky) May 6, 2021

Last one, terrible terrible stuff

11/

Postscript

I’m told there’s be one other reason for combining the elections and holding Hartlepool today: cost

Labour is pretty cash strapped. Some staff expected to depart soon. You could combine promotional material for MP, council and metro mayor & keep down expenses

— Sam Coates Sky (@SamCoatesSky) May 6, 2021

I’m told there’s be one other reason

arrr no other reason thar be

Labour Party be short of pieces of eight

xp if there no other reason thou see
twenty points ahead should they be

Crikey, is there now going to be TV coverage of this fiasco?

I haven't watched NEWSNIGHT for years but I now see ALAN MILBURN and Andrew Fisher appear on it.

Milburn already beginning the BS that "this isn't a referendum on KS" and "voters are telling KS that he should go further" !!

He should do something, tbf...

Starmer would no doubt stop to listen to her legitimate concerns.

Nicola Sturgeon telling Britain First leader Jayda Fransen exactly what #Glasgow thinks of them: pic.twitter.com/pT2HM4lRHj

— Bryan Simpson (@BrySim88) May 6, 2021

Starmer makes all other melt-politicians look good by being such a fucking pathetic coward, it's almost like he's a plant.

fuck this irrelevant shite lads, Royal Wedding: A Day to Remember is on shortly on bbc1!

Funny how support is sliding away from a party that keeps reminding voters every five minutes that it suffered the biggest defeat since the 1930s. Voters obviously see that as a challenge to beat https://t.co/6heiiRY4Sv

— Stephen Smith (@SteveNickSmith) May 6, 2021

*kieth downs his 18th jager of the night*

If he'd have just said my name is Kieth and I'm a reconstructed alcoholic tory cunt ... I still wouldn't have voted for him.

Con: 51.1% (+21.2)
Lab: 43.3% (-1.8)
LDem: 5.6% (-1.7)

another 20 pts gain for the tories in Kitty Brewster - yes that area that me, a keen local election watcher always knew wasn't some made up place.

This is v interesting. One of Sunderland's most deprived wards (I lived there at Uni). Terraces built for shipbuilders. Lost to the Lib Dems after a gigantic swing. Think Labour only need to lose a handful of seats to lose overall control of the council for first time in 50 years https://t.co/2h25WRafVt

— Josh Halliday (@JoshHalliday) May 6, 2021

some voters just despise socialism!

So, how close are we to Starmer being in Resign City, Arizona?

Good thread here

Keir Starmer has made himself a hostage of the Labour right, and at a time of their choosing (not yet) they'll cast him aside. He dynamited all his bridges with the left, cutting himself off from any sources of counter-pressure, so no one's coming to save him. >

— Alex Nunns (@alexnunns) May 6, 2021

You really do love to see it

Shitpost Hegemony pic.twitter.com/FQrqwjPsJl

— Sanitary Naptime (@SanitaryNaptime) May 6, 2021

So, how close are we to Starmer being in Resign City, Arizona?

Jesus Christ

Hartlepool, parliamentary by-election result:

Con: 51.9% (+23.0)
Lab: 28.7% (-9.0)
Ind: 9.7% (+7.5)
RefUK: 1.2% (-24.6)
Grn: 1.2% (+1.2)
LDem: 1.2% (-3.0)
Oth: 6.1% (+4.9)

Con GAIN from Lab.

— Britain Elects (@BritainElects) May 7, 2021

Oh my God. There is no helping these people.

Peter Mandelson interpreting the result as a rebuke against the 2010 electoral college(!): people look at us & say “you picked the wrong brother”

— Tom Clark (@prospect_clark) May 7, 2021

Mandelson more like sonned L man

Some guy called Steve Reed has ended up with the shortest straw and has been sent out to TV and radio studios to tell us that the problem is that Starmer and Labour haven't gone far enough yet in changing the direction of the party.

Anyway. Football is shit, politics is shit. If you want me I'll be in ILM.

"So, how close are we to Starmer being in Resign City, Arizona?"

80+1 is 81, I don't see the problem

ILM, a solid place to avoid shit

You and deems are almost as outdated as the Labour Party.

Praise from Caesar

OK, I'll stick around and bathe in your warm glow.

Lol @ these raw numbers, just an utter shitshow from 2019.

only Labour could find 3.5 million extra voters in 2017 without eating into the Tory vote at all (they themselves gained over 2 million) and not even consider that trying to find these people again might give them a better shot than trying to get Tories to vote Labour pic.twitter.com/XwXLeBg6fW

— The Horse from Triggerin' Terfs (@bojack90s) May 7, 2021