On Cinema at the Cinema on ilxor.com

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the VFA now belongs to HEI

https://i.imgur.com/y5b0rBi.png

frogbs, Friday, 30 April 2021 21:17 (two years ago) link

idk how many of you are HEI subscribers but there's a really funny "Mandatory Network Survey" up there now - it's basically the same as those Trump surveys that went out where the options were "Excellent" and "Very Good" but it does have a great joke at the end: "What minor suggestions would you make to improve the quality of Hei Network?" with a big textbox that only accepts 10 characters

frogbs, Tuesday, 11 May 2021 17:05 (two years ago) link

just enough room for "Tom Cruise"

eisimpleir (crüt), Tuesday, 11 May 2021 17:20 (two years ago) link

Somehow never heard about this show til like a year ago, despite loving Tim & Eric, but slowly watching everything in order has been an incredible time. Just finished season 8 on the timeline. Even with everything that's happened, the original elements of the show are still the funniest part / only get funnier. Though the most I laughed was probably the stock photo reveal at the end of each Port of Call: Hawaii: Save the Island opening -- caught me off guard every single time.

swing out sister: live in new donk city (geoffreyess), Tuesday, 11 May 2021 19:51 (two years ago) link

i think the one that got me the most was tom cruise jr's hologram

nxd, Wednesday, 12 May 2021 09:17 (two years ago) link

gregg's ill-fitting suit in season 1 is still my favorite gag

diamonddave85​​ (diamonddave85), Wednesday, 12 May 2021 16:22 (two years ago) link

Funniest moment for me is probably the Joe Estevez lifetime achievement award during one of the Oscar Specials. The whole thing was like a fever dream and I honestly thought some of the clips they found were cooked up by the producers.

frogbs, Wednesday, 12 May 2021 16:41 (two years ago) link

two weeks pass...

40-minute "On Cinema Summer Preview" audio thing with Tim & Gregg up on Hei today

nobody like my rap (One Eye Open), Friday, 28 May 2021 13:52 (two years ago) link

lol didn't take him long to bring up The Hobbit

frogbs, Friday, 28 May 2021 14:24 (two years ago) link

so Bugs and Lebron are together finally

frogbs, Friday, 28 May 2021 14:37 (two years ago) link

^^ i laughed so hard at that

eisimpleir (crüt), Friday, 28 May 2021 15:35 (two years ago) link

I give it 4 bags. which is actually 5 bags

frogbs, Friday, 28 May 2021 15:55 (two years ago) link

incredible that the Electric Sun tragedy happened just a few weeks before Fyre Festival

swing out sister: live in new donk city (geoffreyess), Monday, 31 May 2021 16:23 (two years ago) link

gregg got me with "you could call it OL', a two-letter title, then you're tied for the shortest title of the summer, and that's a better position to be in."

nobody like my rap (One Eye Open), Tuesday, 1 June 2021 18:02 (two years ago) link

I give it 4 bags. which is actually 5 bags

otm

bobo honkin' slobo babe (sic), Sunday, 6 June 2021 01:37 (two years ago) link

I'm usually not into fan-made paraphernalia but these are great:
https://www.etsy.com/listing/997856806/on-cinema-on-tarot-deck

eisimpleir (crüt), Wednesday, 9 June 2021 17:04 (two years ago) link

Whoa, thank u for sharing. I echo the Tim quote on the box. Just bought a set because they're apparently almost gone.

Jerome Percival Jesus (Old Lunch), Wednesday, 9 June 2021 19:30 (two years ago) link

Aw man I didn’t realize they were nearly sold out. Looks like I missed my chance.

eisimpleir (crüt), Thursday, 10 June 2021 12:44 (two years ago) link

Popp had tunes

swing out sister: live in new donk city (geoffreyess), Sunday, 13 June 2021 03:28 (two years ago) link

four weeks pass...

ROCK HOUSE pilot. This Wednesday. Only on https://t.co/tsJe32Pdy3 #OnCinema #RockHouse @axiaofficial @manuel_giusti @timheidecker @HEINetworkTV pic.twitter.com/5C02lweQxz

— Justin Gaynor (@justingaynor) July 11, 2021

lol this may be a wee bit inspired by The Room

frogbs, Monday, 12 July 2021 15:03 (two years ago) link

"You're taking this... rock house apart!"

nobody like my rap (One Eye Open), Monday, 12 July 2021 17:12 (two years ago) link

Tarot sets are back in stock, btw. They're beautiful and ridiculous.

Separate store for buying individual prints of cards, too! Including bonus I Think You Should Leave content.

https://www.inprnt.com/gallery/deadringerprints/

Western® with Bacon Flavor, Monday, 12 July 2021 19:05 (two years ago) link

lol, once again I missed the chance to buy them

eisimpleir (crüt), Wednesday, 14 July 2021 03:31 (two years ago) link

2014 is the year of the co-host

swing out sister: live in new donk city (geoffreyess), Wednesday, 14 July 2021 04:50 (two years ago) link

lol

Z_TBD (Karl Malone), Wednesday, 14 July 2021 04:54 (two years ago) link

did you say salad days?

swing out sister: live in new donk city (geoffreyess), Thursday, 15 July 2021 21:17 (two years ago) link

Rock House was hilarious, maybe a little *too* on the nose though

frogbs, Friday, 16 July 2021 18:42 (two years ago) link

wild horses is not an easy song

eisimpleir (crüt), Saturday, 17 July 2021 01:38 (two years ago) link

have been rewatching the series and catching a lot of stuff that I missed - first time "Empty Bottle" is played, Tim (presumably) puts the movie rating crawl at the bottom once the verses start, only to pull it once the "fill me up again" chorus starts, then puts it back during the hilariously bad second guitar solo

frogbs, Tuesday, 20 July 2021 18:30 (two years ago) link

I'm glad they have so much of this stuff up on the Hei site now but it's a damn shame about Decker's absence (presumably a rights issue).

Marty J. Bilge (Old Lunch), Tuesday, 20 July 2021 18:45 (two years ago) link

just started watching this finally. already loving it, due to the pedantic arguing over the bags of popcorn rating system

making splashes at Dan Flashes (Neanderthal), Friday, 23 July 2021 18:17 (two years ago) link

check back in once you hit Lucky Season 7, for that is where the show goes truly off the rails, never to return - it's got the Ant Man/Fantastic 4 episode, the introduction of Axiom and "Empty Bottle", Decker vs. Dracula, the first VFA episode, the Dr. San Forgiveness Special, and the Tom Cruise Jr story, plus probably the funniest/wildest intro segments and shoddy editing jokes...probably the single best season

frogbs, Friday, 23 July 2021 19:20 (two years ago) link

lol Tim's crying rn

making splashes at Dan Flashes (Neanderthal), Friday, 23 July 2021 19:24 (two years ago) link

It's weird to go back to 2013 episodes and see Gregg actually able to turn his head with his neck. I'm still so curious why it seems like he can't anymore, and for awhile. Doesn't look like a "character" thing either.

Evan, Friday, 23 July 2021 19:32 (two years ago) link

He's over 50 I think, age does that.

Bo Burzum (Boring, Maryland), Friday, 23 July 2021 20:41 (two years ago) link

Lol @ the Star Trek 4 argument

"There's no hologram on it"

making splashes at Dan Flashes (Neanderthal), Saturday, 24 July 2021 05:29 (two years ago) link

trying to figure out why I like this show so much, besides "it's just my kind of humor"

part of it is the common "person out of their element" trope done in a more meta way. it's not just that they're bad actors, they don't know how to produce a show either. it captures that local commercial/public access vibe really well - shoddy graphics, stock music, every remotely complex segment goes horribly wrong. I've always loved stuff like that, I could watch weird local news segments go off the rails all day. one of OC's biggest strengths is the diversity of its cast, every character feels like they have a totally different background, and it's not in acting. like Axiom and Manuel are really exactly who they appear to be on the show, I think that's cool

another thing is I love the sense of self-importance they both have. reminds me of the early-00's internet days when people would have shitty webcomics or fanfic that would get like some small amount of traffic and suddenly they'd think they were big celebrities, constantly updating their webpage with whatever boring things they were up to and penning big dramatic responses to whatever criticism they'd get. OC captures that really well

frogbs, Tuesday, 3 August 2021 18:30 (two years ago) link

i loved how Gregg pettily chose "Jack Reacher" as his worst movie of the year simply because Tim chose it as his favorite and decided to shit on James Bond

making splashes at Dan Flashes (Neanderthal), Tuesday, 3 August 2021 18:42 (two years ago) link

rewatching the 4th Oscar Special and it just hit me that when Tim is physically threatening Mark he's yelling "Where ya going, Mark!?" the same way Mark did in his 3 Stooges impressions

also I just realized that the name "Axiom" is actually just another Tim mispronunciation

frogbs, Tuesday, 3 August 2021 19:21 (two years ago) link

idk if I'm too jizzle jammed right now but the 3 "high-budget" seasons of Decker are so fucking funny

frogbs, Saturday, 7 August 2021 05:32 (two years ago) link

"Decker's getting laid, mon" is something that will be seared into my brain until the end of time

frogbs, Monday, 9 August 2021 03:43 (two years ago) link

That bar (Arnold's) is very real and such an absolute dive it's pretty hilarious to walk by. (Lanoi is not real)

No idea where to post this but it's such a flashback from 1997:

Gregg Turkington and David Berman, backstage at Tramps, NYC, circa ’97/‘98 pic.twitter.com/nW9Z1hIgV0

— ava (@westcoastwinter) August 8, 2021

Jersey Al (Albert R. Broccoli), Monday, 9 August 2021 04:58 (two years ago) link

Last week I was at a bar to watch a baseball game which got rained out. So they put on AMC and what was on? That’s right, Jaws 2.

frogbs, Wednesday, 18 August 2021 04:49 (two years ago) link

idk if I'm too jizzle jammed right now but the 3 "high-budget" seasons of Decker are so fucking funny

― frogbs, Friday, August 6, 2021 10:32 PM (one week ago) bookmarkflaglink

otm

STOCK FIST-PUMPER BRAD (BradNelson), Wednesday, 18 August 2021 08:20 (two years ago) link

I watched these all before I even knew what On Cinema was so the episode where they're watching the VHS tape of Decker's Oscar winning movie in which Kington is played by Manuel was just the most confusing shit

even now I feel like I'm missing a few things. why was James Dean replaced with the Son of Dracula? why did they spend an entire episode talking about "...wings" ?

frogbs, Wednesday, 18 August 2021 14:37 (two years ago) link

oh god i just lost my shit remembering the vfa archive of the future

STOCK FIST-PUMPER BRAD (BradNelson), Wednesday, 18 August 2021 15:03 (two years ago) link

funniest moment for me is Decker abruptly shooting the nation's Top Military General in the head in the courtroom and the judges just react by yelling at him "You better have a good explanation for this!"

second best is the Vice President (this is a Tim & Eric Awesome Show guy, right?) hanging his head and saying "Yeah, its true. I made a deal with the devil and...I guess I'm just gonna have to pay for it"

frogbs, Wednesday, 18 August 2021 15:40 (two years ago) link

ok I looked up what happened to the James Dean actor, apparently he started going into mental decline so they had to stop using him. its not really explained in-universe.

one thing I found out though is that he was legitimately spooked during the Oscar Special where he's introduced and Tim goes off on him, I guess he wasn't expecting him to explode like that and thought the anger might've been real. the "I'll pull my knife out" line was unscripted, Gregg says "stop putting the camera on him" presumably so someone can explain to him what's going on

makes me wonder who in the OC universe maybe wasn't quite aware of what was going on. Dee Thompson (the dude who snuck into the Oscars) was definitely not an act but I think he was one of those guys who will just go anywhere he's invited. Larry Turman (the guest reviewer/professor on an early season) seemed genuinely annoyed with Gregg, I could almost buy that he wasn't quite in on the joke

the one I really wonder about are the Rat Pack impersonators who were there to celebrate the 20th anniversary of the Rat Pack movie. the Dean Martin/Joe Mantegna impersonator in particular keeps cracking these lame one-liners which are totally at odds with the humor of the show and it seems to catch Tim off guard ("You're trying to upstage me!"), it's like they were told it was a comedy show but not much else. they also appear to be genuinely surprised when they get booted out!

frogbs, Wednesday, 18 August 2021 18:20 (two years ago) link


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