Songs where the singer/protagonist comes off as a serious dick without meaning to

Or for that matter, an animal looking for a person (although the singer does mention having "arms").

Got a wife and kids in Baltimore, Jack
I went out for a ride and I never went back

How quickly we forget about them, with that happy singalong chorus!

But she comes back in the next verse (at least, I’ve always assumed that was her in the Kingston bar—

though how did they get from Kingston to Baltimore?

and was the Kingston in question the “ unincorporated community and census designated place (CDP) along the border of South Brunswick Township in Middlesex County and Franklin Township in Somerset County, in New Jersey, United States”?

It’s “Kingstown,” as in the capital of Saint Vincent and the Grenadines, duh

You’re right—what about Kingstown on Maryland’s Eastern Shore, then? Google maps tells me no bars remain, though the place features a defunct mill (now a garden center)….

Sorry I just don’t see Springsteen hanging out around a defunct mill

lol

Survivor, "The Search Is Over": just what did he put this poor woman through?

You followed me through changes
And patiently you'd wait
'Til I came to my senses
Through some miracle of fate

I was living for a dream
Loving for a moment
Taking on the world
That was just my style
Now I look into your eyes
I can see forever
The search is over
You were with me all the while

needs a response song

"The search is over
I found a better man named Lyle"

The Monkees - "I Wanna Be Free". Davy Jones sounds like an insincere douche on a number of Monkees songs, but this one take the douchecake.

― Gimme Gimme Pop Secret (Old Lunch), Friday, March 27, 2015 5:20 PM (six years ago) bookmarkflaglink

Heard it again this morning, and the lyrics really need to be beheld:

I wanna be free
Like the bluebirds flying by me
Like the waves out on the blue sea
If your love has to tie me
Don't try me, say good-bye

I wanna be free
Don't say you love me, say you like me
But when I need you beside me
Stay close enough to guide me
Confide in me, whoa-oh-oh

I wanna hold your hand
Walk along the sand
Laughing in the sun
Always having fun
Doing all those things
Without any strings to tie me down

I wanna be free
Like the warm September wind, babe
Say you'll always be my friend, babe
We can make it to the end, babe
Again, babe, I've gotta say
I wanna be free

I wanna be fwb

Except you have to be there for me when I need you. And willing to go the eff away when I don't. I'll keep you posted, babe. I wanna be free.

The Byrds - Triad

― kornrulez6969, Monday, March 30, 2015 6:55 PM (six years ago)

Came here to see if this one was ever mentioned (it super qualifies). I've actually never heard the Byrds version - I do love the song when Grace sings it, it's so ridiculous.

I guess Come Up the Years (another JA fave) also belongs here - though I don't think Balin & Kantner's "narrator" really cares how he comes off. He needs help!! 'Fore he falls apart!

"Triad" by the Byrds is gorgeous, despite the lyrics.

Thx - just checked it out, and I agree (though it's maybe a little static-feeling). The Crosby demo is actually really nice...! Neither of these have the sleazy, transparently manipulative vibe that I love about the Airplane's take, though. (Crosby's demo is so "sensitive," he almost has me going... like yeah, let's try it, Dave! I'm all in!)

The line I most love in this song is: "...and in time, maybe others." The protagonist can't help but telegraph the full extent of his horndog master plan!

Wind Beneath My Wings

Butterfly in the sky? Pssh.
I can go twice as high! (smirks)

lol I did the exact same thing Le Bateau Ivre did 5 years ago, searching for and marveling at the lack of Weezer

Rod Stewart's 2018 opioid crisis cash-in 'Didn't I' deserves some kind of award for pulling this stunt. it seems like he's trying to set a tone of tough love wrt to a father's inability to steer his child away from self-destructive choices, but he comes across as if he's waiting for her to wake up from her coma so that he can be certain his taunting and guilt tripping are actually getting through to her

There are times to remember
And times that I wish to forget
Our time together was tinged with love and regret
Oh, my girl
My sweet, sweet little girl

Didn't I try to tell ya that life was for living?
Oh, didn't I?
And wasn't I the guy who said 'stay away from that tribe'?
Oh, wasn't I?

Is this anti-semitism?

And didn't I try to tell you 'that's stuffs gonna kill ya'?
Oh, didn't I?
But you thought it was cool and I was just an old fool
Oh, look at ya

You left home for the city with Hollywood stars in your eyes
Now your mother, God bless her, cries herself to sleep every night
Oh my girl, my sweet innocent girl

Didn't I search the streets for the beggars, pimps and cheats?
Oh, didn't I?

"goddamnit, Fiona, I took cocaine up the ass in 1978, so I'm pretty sure I know a thing or two about drug culture"

And didn't I try to guide you to a baptism of fire?

"baptism by fire" = abusive parenting style

And didn't I try to warn ya 'bout that folk in California?
Oh, didn't I?
But you said 'daddy, please don't worry, I got friends out there who love me'
Now look at ya

can't stand the way he repeats her words back to her in a mocking tone as if he's a 7-year-old playground bully

(Bridge: Bridget Cady)
Oh baby, come back home, we can work this out
There is no blame
I wanna hold you close and stroke your hair and share your pain

at this point mommy swoops in to do a little damage control. "there is no blame" despite the fact that daddy has already blamed his daughter, her friends, and an entire state for her predicament

Didn't I do the best for you, try to make you stay in school?
Didn't I?
Once I was your hero but I went from ten to zero
Oh, didn't I?

accurate summation of Rod's career trajectory

Now listen
For a roll on the dice you nearly paid the ultimate price
Oh, didn't ya?
Now I stand by your bedside, watching you fight for you life

Where's the innocence? (Where's the innocence?)
Where's the future? (Where is the future?)
Where the beauty? (Ooo)
Where's the promise? (Where is the promise?)

bleah

Where's the innocence? (Where's the innocence?)
Where's the future? (Where is the future?)
Where the beauty? (Ooo)
Where's the promise? (Where is the promise?) Where's the innocence? (Where's the innocence?)
Where's the future? (Where is the future?)
Where the beauty? (Ooo)
Where's the promise? (Where is the promise?) Where's the innocence? (Where's the innocence?)
Where's the future? (Where is the future?)
Where the beauty? (Ooo)
Where's the promise? (Where is the promise?) Where's the innocence? (Where's the innocence?)
Where's the future? (Where is the future?)
Where the beauty? (Ooo)
Where's the promise? (Where is the promise?)

Wonder if this song is (with a gender switch) directed at his son who appeared on Celebrity Rehab.

Sounds like he’s singing to a member of the Manson family

I've not heard that Rod Stewart song before

Is it actually called "I don't mean to come on as a serious dick, but"

…you broke my heart”

“Have I Told You Lately that You Disappoint Me?”

Ok I am thinking about Wilson Phillips' song "Hold On," which is generally a supportive and caring message.

But then you get the line "You've got no one to blame for your unhappiness (no baby); you got yourself into your own mess."

Seriously? Fuck you, Carnie. You don't know anything about my life. For all you know, I'm unhappy because my parents were tortured and killed on the orders of Bashar Al-Assad. Then my few possessions were stolen by a crooked Turkish border agent. Pretty sure I've got people to blame.

Though imagine it’s directed at John and Brian.

Hmm. I would say that in the Wilson Phillips oeuvre, the best zing against their parents comes in "The Dream Is Still Alive," which starts out as "Hippies were cool," but throws this elegant bit of shade:

Not so long ago in a purple haze
People dreamed out loud they were not afraid
They stopped the war but not the dying
Some got a little bit lost along the way

But not quite right for this thread because that last bit is intentional.

It's about the only U2 song I can countenance, but "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For", I mean, "I went through hell and high water just to be with you, and for what?!"

Phil Oakey's bit in "Don't You Want Me," though the duet structure leavens it.

Maybe the character in Don't You Want Me isn't intentionally a dick, but surely Phil Oakey knew he was writing him that way.

It's about the only U2 song I can countenance, but "I Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For", I mean, "I went through hell and high water just to be with you, and for what?!"

A save for "I Still Haven't Found...": The "you" is God? Note that elsewhere, a romantic partner appears in the third person, as "her."

Xpost!

toxic divinity

A save for "I Still Haven't Found...": The "you" is God? Note that elsewhere, a romantic partner appears in the _third_ person, as "her."

Xpost!

_A save for "I Still Haven't Found...": The "you" is God? Note that elsewhere, a romantic partner appears in the _third_ person, as "her."

Xpost!_


I think the lyric is just about “not finding it” in erotic love.

-in-

Well, you have to think that Bono is a shitty lay, so that makes sense.

okay thanks for soiling my water

Well, you have to think that Bono is a shitty lay, so that makes sense.

No serious dicking, for sure.

Hasn't Bono had the same girlfriend/ wife since childhood? So I can imagine his grasp on wooing, romancing, and heartbreak is tenuous.

Perhaps because of that, for Bono, romantic love is a metaphor for religion, and his "love" songs are almost always religious in character. Cf. "She moves in mysterious ways," that's a little too on the nose. Some of the same for Al Green, who has said "You Ought to Be With Me" was never about a woman.

Some have suggested that for Marvin Gaye, sexual freedom and human freedom are metaphors for one another.

In actuality, romantic love is a metaphor for the Mexican Revolution. Which was itself a metaphor for pizza.

She Looks Like Me,With
Plastic Jewels,On Low Rent Crown,IN TACKY VERSION OF BOB’S (“THE DRESS” ) MACKIE…SINGING”STILL HAVENT FOUND WHAT IM LOOKING FOR” FLAT🤮

— Cher (@cher) June 11, 2022

https://pitchfork.com/thepitch/624-the-problem-with-ed-sheeran-and-nice-guys-like-him/

Maybe the character in Don't You Want Me isn't intentionally a dick, but surely Phil Oakey knew he was writing him that way.

Definitely. I remember an interview where he mentioned how bemused he is when people tell him it's one of the great love songs: "It's about coercion."

"I'll Be Doggone," an amazing composition/performance/recording, is unfortunately one of these:

I'll be doggone if you ain't a pretty thing
And I'll be doggone if you ain't warm as a breath of spring

And if we live to be a hundred years old
If you ever let that spring turn cold
Then I wouldn't be doggone
Hey, I'd be long gone

Like, okay buddy, we're both a hundred but sure, go play the field.

Well, every woman should try to be
Whatever her man wants her to be
And I don't want much
All I want from you
Is for you to be true to me

As well, all my life, I've thought Marvin Gaye then put the cherry on top by muttering "fetch me a drink" during the fade-out. But it's actually "catch me a train," which does admittedly fit the overall conceit better.

some low-hanging fruit here. I only just now heard this song for the first time - it was a US number one hit in 2000, and as such is covered today by Tom Breihan in his Stereogum column. someone in the comments called it “the ultimate incel power ballad”:

Somewhere there's speaking
It's already coming in
Oh and it's rising at the back of your mind
You never could get it
Unless you were fed it
Now you're here and you don't know why
But under skinned knees and the skid marks
Past the places where you used to learn
You howl and listen
Listen and wait for the
Echoes of angels who won't return

He's everything you want
He's everything you need
He's everything inside of you
That you wish you could be
He says all the right things
At exactly the right time
But he means nothing to you
And you don't know why

You're waiting for someone
To put you together
You're waiting for someone to push you away
There's always another wound to discover
There's always something more you wish he'd say

He's everything you want
He's everything you need
He's everything inside of you
That you wish you could be
He says all the right things
At exactly the right time
But he means nothing to you
And you don't know why

But you'll just sit tight
And watch it unwind
It's only what you're asking for
And you'll be just fine
With all of your time
It's only what you're waiting for
Out of the island
Into the highway
Past the places where you might have turned
You never did notice
But you still hide away
The anger of angels who won't return

He's everything you want
He's everything you need
He's everything inside of you
That you wish you could be
He says all the right things
At exactly the right time
But he means nothing to you
And you don't know why