should ilxors be tempbanned for taking their beefs to other social media? (twitter/fbook/myspace/etc)?

young, dumb, and full of zoloft

Taking sertraline for the team.

Push-up plunge & paxil

(speaking as the person who suggested the screenshot be deleted: I think it was fair in context that gyac post it to prove herself not a demented, fabricating liar in the face of claims that she was; just that once that had been shown, the shot was better removed.

((it's also fair for someone to vent on their own twitter about something completely vague and unidentifable to their followers. but BB was disingenuous about how this can still be taken by readers at the top of this thread, and outrageous in gaslighting about it yesterday. as noted in other strands of this discussion, simply saying "I'm sorry, I was venting to myself," would have been an alternative option, as would actually realising that the words could be hurtful and that fabricating a context put them in a worse light.)))

gyac - I think seeing as the user was trying to gaslight you then it was relevant to the issue at hand, and I certainly don't blame you for showing your receipts at that time. I wouldn't worry about having a ban sprung on you for it, but yeah, it did make the mods realise we don't have an official policy in place. And the better policy is always "no doxing".

(Another hand up here for the "ripped to the tits on SSRIS" crew, of course.)

Agree with sic but yes, if someone's venting with no names no pack drill on another forum, surely thats their own business right?

I wont get into the "muh private sanctuareeee" concept because its ridic on its face re twitter. Less so FB (you can lock posts to v specific audiences).

I just want to raise one open question

Taking things from peoples social media, or their personal info in general, to ilx is now covered in the faq and absolutely rightly so. We're a long running, intertwined social community and all vulnerable to an extent.

Is there a policy in place answering the question asked in this thread title?

And look, thanks to you and the mods because i think everyone knows that this part of the job is shit

xp im specifically referencing ilxors using other public social media to stir ilx shit in public, for the purposes of clarity- not harmless or malign references off board but just to be super clear i dont think that oblique but obvious references to ilx beef on other public media is actually kosher and while ilx mods cannot control that, we can have a policy in place about whether you get to use ilx while acting that way

There is a policy on the FAQ (which is here: ilxor.com/faq) but tbh it's quite old and I kind of disagree with it.

The current statement is this:

An ILX Poster is hassling me off-board! Do something about it!
"No." is the short but unfortunate answer here. The moderators totally disapprove of people being assholes off-board but our jurisdiction is the board: there really isn't anything we can do about it.

However, there have been cases of clear and deliberate harassment on the boards based on an off-line situation, and in those cases we've tried to act by discouraging or attempting to ban the people involved.

There have also been cases which are online feuds that spill over onto the boards, or where any 'harassment' is blatantly two-way -- if there is somebody you hate on ILX then we suggest for the sake of ILX as a whole and its overall tone that you resolve this off-board if possible.

It's pretty tough to police, but I do think we should be sterner about it than this. Especially when users blatantly distort narratives and slander other ilx0rs. I mean, obviously the policy is correct that we can't do anything about off-board situations, but I think it's pretty clear that we can listen to people who've been treated badly and not let their harassers back.

ty

That wording is so old it predates me, and I think referred to requests that expected mods to do something off-board - which obviously they can’t.

I agree it badly needs an update because posters doing that shouldn’t expect to not have consequences here, no.

All of this kind of makes me love this place even more; people actually care.

I mean, a good example is burrito, who did get FPd to a temp ban, but was permanently banned when it came out that he'd been emailing and zoom-bombing other users in a harassing way. That's a pretty straightforward case of off-board shit being banworthy (and even though I now say it was straightforward, there was still a fair amount of back-and-forth about it).

Having a vent on twitter, especially when you don't actually name names, is much harder to judge, and I think having a strict policy about this would be so difficult to enforce. But I do believe there's more we can do than just throw our hands up and say that it doesn't matter because it's not here.

xp to PBKR agreed, everyone's conduct here other than the ex-poster in question has been exemplary IMO

My conduct wasn't so good tbh, I feel pretty bad about blowing up like I did, especially because I was so angry I didn't even make much sense.

emil.y it's totally OK IMO, it was a completely understandable part of that particular discourse and I for one appreciated it and understood the post was made w/frustration

also, it was in defense of another poster

I think you've been great through al of this and I actually though abt messaging you on FB to tell u that

sorry 4 typos

Oh pish, emil.y, you're the absolute best of us. xps

It made perfect sense, emil.y. It needed to be said.

have to disagree with you there emil.y, really. sleeve otm. and everyone else xpish

the FAQ could probably use a caveat at the top noting how non-updated it is

(I know this has been suggested before, just mentioning while it’s being touched. mb date new entries too?)

Fancy a FAQ?

Ha, now I'm worried it looks like I was fishing for compliments/reassurances. Thanks, guys. I think it's fine to say that it was a pretty ludicrous blowout while still understanding where it came from and why.

the FAQ could probably use a caveat at the top noting how non-updated it is

Agree with this, yeah. Stet's been good at updating bits and pieces but as a whole it's still got a way to go.

Come on, my blow up was worse. I'm the one that was begging them to go away. I'm going to admit to posting a video about seagulls attacking on my FB as a way to quietly vent, but I don't think anyone made the connection.

xp I'm the rebel with the Wellbrutin and the crew neck.

What’s plausible deniability? I don’t know, I’m just a happy-go-lucky pixie of some sort.

is this an acceptable time to point out how funny this was

mayor mccheese of pixies

Mayor McPixie Cheese Girl

omg

Not to be a killjoy but since the issue has been resolved to the board's general satisfaction, maybe we can take advantage of this moment to stop talking about it outside of sprucing up the FAQ? It feels unnecessary and a bit inflammatory regardless of the circumstances to indulge in mocking (obliquely or otherwise) anyone who's not allowed to respond.