DieHARD GamePOLL - Console Poll, vol. 3 - 5th Generation RESULTS

dlh otm

FF7s entire 'thing' feels like as glorious a dead-end as "fully rendered shot-by-shot puzzle worlds" (Myst) or "green-screen FMV seven-disc epics" (Phantasmagoria)

It wasn't until I got a couple hours into FF8 that I realized this was stupid

And then by FFX they added awful voice acting to the mix! FF4-6 really was some magic that wouldn't be repeated, I guess

things i voted for that didn't make the cut (i can't really defend some of these selections):

16: Die Hard Trilogy
three games in one! it's a gimmick that was 2/3s of a failure. Die Hard 2 was represented as a on-rails shooter (a la time crisis but much worse); Die Hard 3 became a really poorly implemented driving-centered game that was only played by the developers, and not for long at that.

but Die Hard 1 was absolutely addicting, to an extent that i'm afraid to revisit it and ruin my memories. the draw distance is horrible, everything is pixelated, and everything that was good about it has probably been iteratively improved a thousand times over since then.

17: NFL Blitz
22: Mahrio Pahty
27: Vigilante 8
twisted metal but with better graphics and more interesting characters/cars

28: Conker's Bad Fur Day
i didn't care for the single-player mode (banjo kazooie but worse), but it had a very addicting multiplayer mini-game called "Beach":

You play as either the Tediz or Villagers. Here, the Villagers attempt to escape to Paris while the Tediz try to stop them. The Tediz are limited to being inside some sniper towers, but they have access to weapons. The Villagers have no weapons, and must only rely on pure evasion to survive, and a few power ups. The Villagers must reach one side of the map to the other to escape. There is an explosives button on top of a hill. If a Villager manages to reach the button and press it, all Tediz in their bunkers will be temporarily killed, buying other Villagers much time before the Tediz respawn again. The Villagers must reach the escape area within a time limit. If the timer reaches 0, a laser beams down from the sky and instantly kills the Villager. This laser is described as being the Tediz' secret weapon.

i think that description (from the conker wiki) hints at what's wrong with the game. Conker, the character, and all the other characters, as well as the general world you live in, fucking blows. it's a bizarre combo of realism and cartoonish doofs, and none of it is funny. as a result, since playing Conkers Bad Fur Day (even the title....ugh) i have never been able to sit through anything that involves a wisecracking animal or small child who is on the verge of R-rated but still PG-13

31: Rayman
is rayman good? is it bad? does anyone like rayman? it's fucking hard, i know that

34: Ogre Battle 64
i've only played an emulation (i imagine this is one of those $150 N64 games these days?). it's more difficult and complex than FF Tactics, i think, but to a fault

36: Cool Boarders 2
one of those games you vote for because you remember having only 2 games for a system for months on end, and playing the shit out of both of them

37: Body Harvest
i was the only one to vote for this. it didn't deserve my vote.

39: Destruction Derby

i've never understood anybody ranking SNES Mario Kart over Mario Kart 64, but then, i didn't play the SNES one until i'd spent endless hours with 64, and so by comparison the SNES one seemed painfully slow, hard to control, flat, ugly, lifeless, constantly falling into pits, etc. i think i've had more fun playing its DOS shareware knockoff "Wacky Wheels." but if i'd encountered them in the other order i would probably feel differently!

KM otm Conker is bad

I like that somebody ranked Wave Race 64 as their #1, that game is so good!

I loved the characterizations and the overall vibe of Conker. To play a N64 game that has cursing in it is such a novelty. I see it as sort of a precursor to stuff like Psychonauts.

Hard to believe that SATURN BOMBERMAN didn't make it! This game was a blast. I think it's the only one from my ballot that was left outside the 77.

just had a blast playing goldeneye multiplayer, over Parsec. It all just came flooding back. Damn that music too.

mario kart 64 is total bullshit but i got very good at the way in which it is total bullshit

the best mario kart is simply the one with the most tracks. which is the newest one i assume

My biggest challop I guess was ranking Doom 64 above Goldeneye on my ballot. It's probably not a better game, but I kinda fell in love with it playing through the recent remaster. *Atmosphere* is major draw for me in any game, and Doom 64 has got one heck of an atmosphere.

doom 64 is v good yeah! partly for the same reasons as ps1 doom, which unlike doom 64 does not have its own set of maps but does have colored lighting, more darkness, a generally enhanced sense of menace + uh doom. sadly don't remember either running as slickly as actual-doom did on a 486. (ps1 doom certainly doesn't on my current ps2.) that will've been fixed in the remaster tho.

doom's hidden 2-dimensionality makes it much better-suited to the consoles of this gen than the post-doom full-3d shooters that actually became popular on them. pc doom on a keyboard is one of the most frictionless control schemes ever but i can't actually swear that the ps1 controls are any less so.

bomberman is always doomed to underperform in these polls because no single bomberman was played by enough people to get it where it should be and no single person can ever be sure which is the really good bomberman. yet bomberman is clearly, like, the second-best game ever made.

Bomberman Ultra for PS3 one the one that really got its hooks in me. Great game

The Bomberman I know and love was the game released on Megadrive (Genesis), and I really only preferred the single player level mode. (YES I DO HAVE FRIENDS FANK YOU.)

There's a half decent Steam version, which as per the current norm involves lots of online folk. Bombergrounds Battle Royales, and hey it's free.

My brother and I had Bomberman 64 and let me tell you, the game does not translate well to 3D

that's a bummer, cause the system natively supports four controllers, and several of its iconic titles (Goldeneye, Smash Bros, Mario Kart) are famed as party games first and foremost. i imagine if they'd made a really, really great 2D Bomberman for that system, it could have been many people's first or definitive experience with the joys of Bomberman!

bomberman hero, the other n64 one, didn't even have multiplayer lol

and then they made a bomberman 64 2 which almost no one bought and is one of the rarest n64 carts

and then (i just looked this up, never knew about it before) the final n64 game ever released was a japanese-only 2d bomberman game confusingly titled bomberman 64

i ended up playing the spastic Interplay-produced Atomic Bomberman during the era. it was... good enough

access the level editor by simply pressing CTRL-E six times from the main menu

i missed this rollout entirely but it made for a good friday read... so thanks!

did you voet?

i misspelled that on purpose, and i'm not sure why (joek?)

i did voet
i was the other voet for FFT as #1 with you

<3

Hard to believe that SATURN BOMBERMAN didn't make it!

セガサターンのサターンボンバーマン10人プレイは凄い迫力です‼️ pic.twitter.com/fUcEQ8MJd4

— 今宮年男（大分県一心寺住職） (@imamiyatoshio) November 22, 2020

also missed this, cheers to KM

the best mario kart is simply the one with the most tracks. which is the newest one i assume

agree with this general principle except that iirc Wii Kart has more ten-star new tracks than Kart 8 (the WiiU versh), and also picked better "retro" tracks to spruce up

but Kart 8 also iirc has a four-course round of retro Rainbow Road courses, so swings and roundabouts

all of the ones with blue shells are bad

i typed that out a couple days ago and then deleted it, but that's otm

rubberbanding has always been a part of mario kart, but it's gotten out of control

play on Time Trial if you can't take the heat imo

been reading through this thread. missed all the action, but i would have voted Paperboy #1. Happy that OoT beat Majora's Mask.

I was coming here to post this article, which gets at what I was saying above about the PlayStation

https://superchartisland.com/wipeout-2097/

But I forgot that I sat on my hands to avoid asking Sufjan - why? What has Ocarina of Time got that Majora's Mask doesn't?

you don’t have to get that annoying n64 expansion pack

I just really love OoT for the giant leap it so successfully made. MM really only suffers in comparison because it wasn't the first one I played. If I revisit them, I could see enjoying MM more. First play through of OoT was just so damn magical, though.

I'm currently playing link's awakening for the first time, though (on Switch). More OoT stuff was introduced by that game than I'd realized. Jumping from NES to N64 made the leap seem even larger than it probably was.

LttP??

I've played the SNES LttP on switch as well. It seems like Link's Awakening polished a lot of these elements that were in there by LttP, as I think you are saying. but I'm playing the remastered Link's Awakening, so maybe that's coming out of that? Link's awakening has fishing, helpful owl, dampe, etc. Some of the puzzle solving in LttP also felt like an outlier, whereas LA feels more like OoT Zelda, albeit with goombas lol.

I've never felt such a complex emotion as the one I felt when the Slave-y Ur-Quan kept trying to argue that they were just trying to protect you from the Genocide-y Ur-Quan

you imagine the threat of unknown invaders,
or alien pestilence borne on the solar wind.
we have seen these.
but
you do not acknowledge your worst enemy.
we have found dead worlds without number,
planets ravaged by atomic fire or gaian collapse.
these worlds were not rendered sterile by outside forces.
they bear sad testament
to the effects of unrestrained instinct and emotion,
or simple ignorance.
we will
prevent
such mistakes.

generation 6 incoming