Alone in the Park - it's the Prem 2020-21 thread

Stick a fork in me

Moyes should stop home permanently.

Aight I'm out. This is youth league defending

It's a shit business

Nothing about this is undeserved

Fulham and Leeds next opponents.

Hopefully that's a relief

We were poor at the start of last season, it's very nil desperandum but ffs

Gash tonight

Appreciate there's a lot of risk around the pandemic, but not sure this approach of randomly generating the results is appropriate

Also last year I could still go out for another few hours

If there was any justice our lads should be suffering my hangover this morning

Had a fucking awful day.

Just got home as got 2 flat tyres on the m5, lost my wallet, & to top it off I just managed to step barefoot in catshit.

Today can fuck off.

Time to watch my recording of mighty Wolves vs the Hammers.

No-one tell us the score, cheers #wwfc 🤞🏻🐺

— OldGold80 (@OGold80) September 27, 2020

😬

Not sure Fulham will reach Derby’s 2007/2008 points total at this rate.

Think they've got us coming up soon, should settle their nerves

Was gonna say over the weekend I think Fulham will go down but I don't see them being 9pts in a season flameouts, they'll get it down on the deck and play some nice stuff and surprise a couple of teams or whatever ¯\(°_o)/¯

As Nult would say this season so far has been one where one would not feel emboldened to make definitive, long-term predictions, but in retrospect perhaps Fulham's obvious total unawareness that opposition attackers may sometimes move should probably have suggested a problem to me

What do we reckon, five all?

certainly look as though we'll be good for a couple of pennos in the current climate but i'm not gonna worry, not with Ice Cold Emi Martinez in goal.

we still look pretty bad in many important ways. passing the ball from one player to the other for eg

Is John McGinn "back"? Two assists and a textbook marseille roulette before half time

LOL EVEN MCGINN IS AT IT pic.twitter.com/mVg5vBQ4pe

— Tøbiàs 🦁 (@AVFCTobias) September 28, 2020

yeah lol you could see what he was gonna try as he raced into contact, ngl i cheered

sincere appreciation too in this house for Trezeguet sprinting from right to left and back again, beating several defenders, losing the ball, winning it back, passing it on and making a run into the box, going like the clappers the whole time, before finally crashing face first into the turf when he inevitably ran out of gas at the crucial moment. go on son

Industrial-grade ketchup on that 0.8 Girosflin from the wee man. Bedlam in the ends. Fulham got straight-up Ultra Naté'd

Did I miss a third goal because I was composing a risible Mundial spoof post? Yes

go on rule that shit out

Martinez did not drop a clanger, that is fake newa

Don't call it a comeback

Not sure Fulham will reach Derby’s 2007/2008 points total at this rate

At this stage I'm wondering if they'll reach Swindon's goal's conceded record.

didn't have tierney down as a typical arsenal primadonna

wah my poor face wah

get tae fuck

scotland's other left-back having a moment there mind

tierney hits back by being absolutely ruined for the equaliser

and that's that little face-off settled

Pep might not like having a negative GD at the moment but a solemn reminder that Stoke lost their first ever league game 2-0 and that was the closest they've ever been to zero overall pic.twitter.com/oiYlSB6eKr

— Duncan Alexander (@oilysailor) September 28, 2020

lol

not that charlton's would look much different? actually i now need to know this

I can only offer you all-time PL goal difference

https://www.statbunker.com/alltimestats/AllTimeLeagueTable?comp_code=EPL

I'm sorry I'm not having MK Dons in there.

meh! I refuse to acknowledge such lousy Murdoch propaganda that ignores 100+ years of football history

bit of a turn-up

Morning, Villans. 😉

Welcome to Aston Villa, @RBarkley8! 🙌

🟣 #WelcomeRoss 🟣 pic.twitter.com/hTBWEi1RDz

— Aston Villa (@AVFCOfficial) September 30, 2020

Elegant Stealth Transfer

Not a bad window. Just need to sort, it says here, Milot Rashica - I don't know what that is but I know I need it yesterday

He's very good.

Newly Chipper Villans a nice counterweight to the cocky Wolves massive itt

i'm just gonna let that one sit for a while

I wish the gloomy Baggies were having a good transfer window or at least just bought their main transfer target rather than fucking about and haggling over mere pennies, because in the meantime our transfer window is at a standstill until the matter is resolved and no point playing deadline day chicken with our rotary club gammon chairman, no-one will win.

I'm sure I speak for the board's entire Aston Villa Football Club contingent when I say we retain deep respect for Wolverhampton Wanderers despite their baffling and borderline offensive shitting of the bed on Sunday evening

aiui Wolves-Villa is a tepid rivalry compared with either club against Blues or West Brom.

Everyone dislikes the Blues, that time under McLeish when they beat Arsenal in the league cup final was all the sweeter because it was the start of their hopefully ongoing downward spiral.

The Blues are cunts, tbh the Boggies are more a gently patronised poor cousin than a hate figure.

lol, yeah, Birmingham's ratio of success to widespread loathing engendered must be the largest in the country maybe

My uncle's one

He's a cunt ah no he's grand

I can't work out what element of Blues hate is their comical lack of trophies as compared to their long history of being renowned for thuggish lumpishness