mayo: the devil's condiment

I tried miracle whip, it was nasty, and I like mayo and salad cream.

more like disaster whip

Ah, back when I was playing around with rudeness as an online style. (Glad I got over it.)

you were right though, mayo haters are snowflakes

j/k

what's odd about mayo haters isn't that they hate mayo, but that they feel it necessary to argue that mayo hate is a fundamental value of all right-thinking humans and eating mayo is ipso facto evidence of depravity.

it’s a humor thing

ok. now do carrots.

carrots are better than mayo

that's all you've got?

http://www.flooby.com/images/fcorigin4b.jpg

it’s not too hard to make mayonnaise, it just requires an egg, a neutral flavored oil, and a little mustard, wine vinegar, salt, and lemon juice, and a food processor

i think i bought some bad mayo, even though the date implies it should be good? wasn't right.

mayo is probably ruined for a few years now.

I can relate to that. it will hopefully not be for that long. I couldn’t eat a lot of foods for a while after my college organic chemistry lab experience

you don't need a food processor to make much of anything, certainly not mayonnaise.

i will say i found it to be a lot less weird once i learned how to make it from scratch.

when mayo gets hard it taste funay

maybe it is not necessary, but my food processor is one of the best cooking items I’ve ever owned, and has made many of my kitchen experiences much easier

I’m making a batch of potato salad tomorrow and will think of this thread when I’m adding the mayonnaise

I want you to think of me when you're adding that mayo to your potato salad tomorrow, Dan S

in fact every time you add mayo to potato salad I want you think of me and only me, Dan S

from yr recent posts seems you've been "adding mayo" to a stiff stock to National Geographic vids

shhh

xp respond to these messages so that I know you have received them, Dan S

:) I’m trusting that these posts are joshing, but I don’t know what they really mean and am going to bed now so that I can be fresh for making potato salad tomorrow

xp, always proofread your burns before hitting "post," Neanderthal. "sock" not "stock."

we should do a duke’s vs hellmann’s poll

I mean the write-ins for kewpie would probably win but whatever, food nerds

I've realized quite recently that I prefer hellman's to kewpie. have them both in the fridge at the moment and basically never draw for the kewpie. they don't sell duke's here afaict

I like mayonnaise fine, but cannot deal with kewpie, it just tastes so sweet and chemical and inorganic

kewpie ingredients: veggie oil, egg yolk, vinegar, salt, msg, spice, natural flavor
hellman's ingredients: soybean oil, water, whole eggs and egg yolks, vinegar, salt, sugar, lemon juice, calcium disodium edta, natural flavors.

why does kewpie taste so sweet then?

I also perceive kewpie as being sweet, and was surprised to find there is no sugar in it.

hellman's is definitely tangier, I suppose it has both vinegar and lemon juice

apple cider or rice vinegar probably

(in kewpie)

I have never heard of duke’s or kewpie mayonnaise

don't think apple cider vinegar or rice vinegar (if it's not seasoned rice vinegar) are that sweet. "natural flavors" seems like it covers a lot of territory in terms of sweetness

I like seasoned rice vinegar for sprinkling over sushi rice while it steams the moment after it is cooked, otherwise don't use it

Good fries dipped in good mayo are good. The French are 100% otm on this.

Hellman's vegan mayo is legit.

I like Hellman's, but prefer Duke's why because it's more mayonnaisey

I tolerate Kewpie now, especially on Okonomiyaki and hard-boiled eggs.

I am half-convinced you are all making up this Kewpie shit

it sounds like the name of a mayonnaise with a vaguely racist Youtube gaming channel

it's Japanese

Ah, this thread again.

I do feel like hating mayo is the new bacon/pizza/whatever

I mean I hardly ever eat mayo but it's... fine?

British people: is there something working-class about salad cream or am I crazy?

maybe? I know mayonnaise seemed kind of fancy when I was a kid, maybe because of the French name. and we did used to use salad cream instead.

I do feel like hating mayo is the new bacon/pizza/whatever

ie hipster whites are now performatively talking about it?

thinly veiled metaphor iirc

Kewpie is 100% racist, and I resisted buying it for that reason. But then again I am a Quaker and I eat the dumbass oats for breakfast every day, so I’ve got no leg to stand on.

Thinking a lot about becoming one of those guys who keeps a lil' squeeze bottle of homemade mayo in the fridge.

Simon's got a squeeze bottle, blender doesn't sleep at night.

mayo is not “fine”!!!

Slathered mayo on BLTs last night. Delicious.

m on (bl)t's

someone must have made that joke before