Alone in the Park - it's the Prem 2020-21 thread

Everton threatening to be, what, the third team to return from pre-season so far

deliberately maneuvered to get my class's lunch to start at exactly the time the Wolves match does. ;) so that covers the first half at least.

you could probably check out now anyway

jfc I was 6 minutes late getting the feed up and we scored twice already?

Wolves are just putting on a masterclass in possession retention in that last sequence. Jimenez just a touch high there.

dying to see the goal replays

man Jimenez is fast

Drafted Jimenez first in our fantasy league so a goal within three minutes was an excellent early return.

I think Sheffield United's fake fans have been stunned into silence by those two early goals.

they're staging a fake walkout right now

Sheffield starting to see more possession now

If McBurnie gets sent off he can probably make his shift at the South London craft beer shop he works at the rest of the time.

major lol at Donk's bowl cut

wow, first goal was a beaut.

Podence, maaan, nice linkup

amazed Sheff didn't score on that one

wow, lucky again. Patricio was exposed there.

Wolves you might wanna tighten up here.

wow, almost 3 there but nope

Far be it for me but that was a high quality win

A high quality spanking if I'm honest

well-earned clean sheet (esp that Seiss header towards the end to save a goal). considering how out of sorts Wolves looked at the beginning of last year, good start to the year.

Chelsea have been fairly shite

3-1

Brighton pretty possible to go down imo

I thought they looked pretty good tbh. Lamptey is a brilliant prospect

Chelsea scored two jammy goals and a wonder strike out of nothing

On the basis of this weekend there are worse teams than Brighton.

I can't believe I'm saying this in week one but the current bottom three look like they're all going down, depending on who West Ham replace Moyes with.

Raul's touch on his goal was so beautiful I nearly cried

I was too bombed to properly follow Chelsea-Brighton tbf. West Brom a lock for relegation, almost certainly Fulham, that's gotta take the stress off a few teams

Jack Grealish has signed a new contract at Aston Villa for a number of years and, perhaps unfortunately for him, it's fiiiiiive

I have a soft spot for the boy Grealish I gotta admit

good callback biscuits

yes it had me searching for the footcelsior thread

One of the game's sleeping giants, biscuits man aston villa is desperate to relive past glories

Tell you what I reckon the villa could nick this on a set piece

lot of shade thrown Neil Taylor's way these last 4 years but credit to the lad, the way he fooled those Burton defenders into thinking he'd totally lost sight of the ball during the build-up to the equalizer was something else. Bergkampesque! #BAMBOOZLED

That assist was completely above his pay grade. Everything about his body language screamed "do I have to?"

Watkins too, to be fair. A Terrible Goal To Have To Score

He's ready

Tottenham are in talks to sign Gareth Bale from Real Madrid. Daniel Levy have asked about Bale during the negotiations for Reguilon.
Bale’s agent Jonathan Barnett just confirmed to BBC: “Gareth still loves Spurs, we are talking. It's where he wants to be”. ⚪️ #THFC #Real #Bale

— Fabrizio Romano (@FabrizioRomano) September 15, 2020

Some speculation about Alli going the other way as well but I can't really believe Zidane has decide that Dele is the solution to all his problems.

both Villa scorers tonight looking appropriately embarrassed to be associated with the rest of these schlubs

Oh wow are youse in the lead?

Man these local derbies are the worst

third Villa scorer looking pretty chuffed with himself but tbf he's a "striker" scoring his first ever goal after approximately 6000 competitive minutes so good for him i guess

I checked but I knew you meant Keinan Davis. Worst player in the Prem last year along with Ricardo. Well... maybe a bit behind Ricardo.

https://play.stuff.co.nz/details/_6190616384001

seems like a shit deal but Jose won't care I suppose

Tottenham to pay Real Madrid €30m (£27.5m) plus €5m (£4.5m) in add-ons for Sergio Reguilon. Madrid retain buyback for two years at set price of €40m (£36.8m). They also have right of first refusal. Great short-term deal for Spurs, brilliant for Madrid. https://t.co/mtHC5pCwfQ

— Colin Millar (@Millar_Colin) September 16, 2020

this is a loan until he's gone basically

There’s speculation that Bale would be a permanent transfer with no fixed fee and Spurs would just pay on performance metrics.

Looks like we're centering in on a brick shithouse Dutch target man as well. If we can sign a centre back as well then it's party time.

Dost?

That's what I heard yeah.

Christ, it looks like the Bale thing is actually happening. Lo Celso-Son-Bale-Kane could be a motherfucker.

Probably needs to be caveated that he hasn’t really had a proper run of starts for two years and hasn’t looked great when he has played but if Spurs can get him fully fit and motivated, absolutely.

Dost seems a lot more realistic than asking for Belotti on loan.

I see Leeds are too big for the Carabao already