your terrible ideas

EVAWAZNAEB
STOP
PANS
ZNIEH

― Karl Malone, Thursday, September 10, 2020 8:11 AM (twelve hours ago) bookmarkflaglink

STOP
PANS
SMEE

Fed up of being Rickrolled? How about being Rickyrolled?

Youtube ads are ruining the 'roll

They are literally pre-roll ads.

Time to license the song and use it in a YouTube ad

i am blocking ads so i got properly 'rolled. never gonna give you up was on in the gym yesterday!

was playing pokemon go with kids this morning, and thought of a similar game where you are the coronavirus and you have to infect all the Republican politicians at the Amy Coney Barrett announcement in the Rose Garden, "gotta catch em all!" etc.

a fake conservative meme with hunter biden's face pasted over Gunther from Friends face at central perk. Rachel's head would be replaced with a briefcase overflowing with $100 bills. The side of the briefcase says 'LOBBYING CASH' and the caption is 'Gunther Bitin'.

Chopsticks with pencil-style erasers on them. So you can eat something but then change your mind.

(Could also work with drumsticks, so if you flub a note you can just erase it.)

As I woke up this morning, I had an idea for a standup comedy routine built around the idea that modern products/appliances are too high tech/internet connected. I'd start with a joke along the lines of "So I woke up this morning, went to brush my teeth...I couldn't, toothbrush wasn't working. ...Got an error message saying I had to update the operating system." I'd continue on "So then I go down for breakfast to make myself toast, and my toaster said it was 'downloading updates, 54% complete.'" But it would just continue on with that same joke premise for like an hour, following the mundane details of my entire day. "Got in my car to drive to work, but the engine wouldn't start. Said the wifi signal was too weak." etc.

Delivered with a slow, grumpy "can you believe this shit?" tone, with lots of pacing back and forth and long pauses for laughs.

thanks i hate it https://t.co/etOwb6d3Yx

— Internet of Shit (@internetofshit) October 12, 2020

hahaha amazing, I really thought picking "toothbrush" was a safe bet for a joke

yeah, posted in the last week as well. interesting examples on the account, cars that are effectively bricked because OTA updates failed because they were parked underground...

what is the DEAL with the internet of things? *laugh track* *bass*

https://tribzap2it.files.wordpress.com/2011/09/andy-rooney-cbs.jpg?w=550&h=380

fwiw when we got our most recent car we actually did have a glitch where we couldn't use basic features like the radio because there was a GPS problem and we couldn't get past the GPS error message on the touch screen. And I genuinely do hate internet of things.

I have a terrible idea and it's called Quibi 2 (or perhaps New Quibi). It's just like the old Quibi except you need to buy a dedicated portable device to watch it. And there isn't any way to connect headphones so you have to use the built-in speakers. And they're LOUD (no volume control, sorry).

the Q-phone

You can't receive content, you can only send content.

This is some kick-ass Quib.

QuibX

After being bombarded with YouTube ads for Hankook Tyre (cue footage of supercars doing burnouts and donuts), I came up with this: a remake of Hancock's Half Hour that constantly shoehorns in references to Hankook Tyres ("A pint? That's nearly half a tyre full!") called Hankook's Half Hour. Or as the character Hankook (played by Danny Dyer or Dean Gafney or someone equally unsuited) would say it at the beginning of each episode "Hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhankook's Half Hour".

I’m American and I don’t know what any of those things are

you should really check out youtube silby, at least

lol

a turkish spice company with justin bieber as its spokesperson called justin biber

I bought some pul biber for the first time recently, there's a store here called Pull & Bear and both of them keep mutating into something like pul and beiber

a turkish spice company with justin bieber as its spokesperson called justin biber

actually no, it would have to be

cöstın biber

temperamental horse a.i. for electric bicycles where you need to feed and take care of it like a tamagotchi

Horse eBikes

lol

the poetry of William McGonagall performed in a calypso style

― pissbaby nobody in the corner (DJ Mencap), Sunday, 29 March 2015 18:03 (five years ago)

Sorry it took so long...
The Railway Bridge of the Silvery Tay

A Cake cover band...

called...

FROSTING

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aJDGjyJ4--8

DAMMIT

frosting vs. icing is one of the questions on the NYT regional dialect quiz

I’ve been thinking about posting comments on the Ring neighbors app in the style of Among Us discussion. “Neighbor30 self-report! sus af”

Suckumentaries: A series of music documentaries directed, scripted and told exclusively by people who hate the band in question.

I’d watch

That has potential.

Had The Doors specifically in mind for the first one. It would be edited exactly like a typical music doc except every line of it would be negative.

Love this idea. Would contribute to the Kickstarter.

As long as Jim Derogatis is never ever involved in any way.

Yeah, that could be really great. Every interview strategically edited to make the band members sound like they hate their own music, etc.

If this winds up on adult swim I’ll know we have a mole

yeah this is not a terrible idea at all!

haha, i know a dude at adult swim! on twitter, i mean. but he put conferencecall.biz in a show he used to make, and we consistently like each other's tweets, so we're tight

i will DM him and then take my customer 10% terrible ideas coordinator finders fee

customary