Blue Saturday

triple berry hot cross buns tho

i don't really know where to put the observation that pretending Little and Large were ever funny is some of the most shocking revisionist history i've ever seen

Feels like all the minor celebrities that died before the last 5 years really missed out; since 2015 every cunt gets the Diana treatment for a day at least

it's a strange one when being piss-poor is one of the only aspects of your notability

soon as i dressed for a walk the sky went dark ffs

what size is yr cap

i thought the sunshine would do me good tbh

by the time i've finished going thru the automatic phone system to order a repeat prescription there's a good chance it'll be summer tbf

xp lol sorry i think i've just got it

heh

i don't know where to put this but

WHO FLEW WITH CRABS?! pic.twitter.com/c0cux6Jyyi

— Reese Waters (@reesewaters) April 16, 2020

warning: do not watch if you hate crabs

not really blue just bored af

Been a long time since I rock and rolled

long long time

Been a long lonely lonely lonely lonely lonely

Time

*bad ass riff*

say what you like about the tenets of mawkish sadness, at least it's an ethos

That is a booming dn though.

For real

gonna sit here for a bit

Astyages had a daughter, whom he called Mandane: concerning whom he had a dream, that enough water flowed from her to fill his city and overflow all Asia. He imparted this vision to those of the Magi who interpreted dreams, and when he heard what they told him he was terrified: and presently, Mandane being now of marriageable age, he feared the vision too much to give her to any Median worthy to mate with his family, but wedded her to a Persian called Cambyses, a man whom he knew to be well born and of a quiet temper: for Astyages held Cambyses to be much lower than a Mede of middle estate.

But in the first year of Mandane's marriage to Cambyses Astyages saw a second vision. He dreamt that there grew from his daughter a vine, which covered the whole of Asia. Having seen this vision, and imparted it to the interpreters of dreams, he sent to the Persians for his daughter, then near her time, and when she came kept her guarded, desiring to kill whatever child she might bear: for the interpreters declared that the meaning of this dream was that his daughter's offspring should rule in his place.

Jesus Haribo Christ it's warm

It’s so bad

I like the warm but ffs, got a fan on my bed tho lol

If i could strip skin i would be doing so

*off my own

Good Cher single

Such a deep luxurious blue today, my thick quilty armor stitched from equal parts loneliness and freedom, such a gorgeous sadness I just wanna roll in it. Wish the sun would join me but as long as the rain doesn't fall I am going out to revel in being alone amongst friends and strangers. The syrup of melancholy, the maraschino of the blues.

The syrup of melancholy, the maraschino of the blues

I keep hearing this in the gravelly Leonard Cohen voice but really it is quite the line.

no poetry like sentimentalizing fuckery :D

Later, when I'm hungover and my mouth tastes like a burnt out cigar, this is to remind me that today has been really good and coloured with love and friendship

*hat tip*

They’re selling Christmas cards at the scope shop

That was a purely unintentional desolation row homage lol

how can it ever be Christmas when 2020 has lasted a hundred years?

Of ffs soz

l'imaginaire is my worst frenemy

feel so at odds with the universe

(that's all, just putting it here to stop this feeling going round my head on loop and maybe I can get on with having other thoughts instead. sorry to interrupt your day)

I feel that. Have felt depressed this week, which I blame on going out for dinner last week and it hitting me like a tonne how much i miss people. I have been someone who is a loner since I was old enough to walk, this is really strange for me.

maybe a breakthru i had in counselling this year was realising i'm always gonna be at least a bit at odds with this society and that's ok, it's a bad society, i don't wanna belong to it

the rona has brought in whole new layers of boring dystopia, even the escape routes that used to be normally available have been closed or curtailed. the words "new normal" are on my death list like "these times" but if this is going to be our world for the foreseeable then i'm trying not to think too hard about it, the extra sheets of glassy isolation between us, the pseudo-curfews, the closing down of what world there is

there were some good things and some pleasures to be found in the lockdown, but now all we've got is shitty England consumerworld, now with fewer bonus features. sooner i can afford to drink more the better.

ach, the feelings come and go

and fuck me i really miss karaoke

Lads I'm finding it really hard to get out of bed lately

I’m sorry, tell us about it at least. It’s the length of this thing isn’t it?

It's a bunch of stuff, just being bothered to push back against gentle despair, too much regret for things I've done, too lazy and anxious to get back into work. I keep worrying I'm going to hit depression again and I don't think I'm there yet but I'm emulating the outer forms. I think (badly) managing no money is kind of exhausting too, makes me wanna stay in and do nothing.

I still feel at a point where I could just jump up and start to do something about it but then every morning - lol this is morning - the weight of apathy settles down

Me being overly dramatic in yr thread NV and part of it definitely the lack of sleep I had last night but fuck it all today, right? Really feels great being in a better position to the majority of my family and friends and still feeling that there’s no future worth having for most people my age and younger, only endless grubbing for coins and fluffing of fascists, and the people who should stand for you are embarrassed by you but still demand your support. Lol @ me thinking I would stop being hurt by politics after the exit poll and it still having the power to do so almost a year on.

Sorry, as you were.

It's fine

You know, of course, that I feel you

You’re a fave for a reason mate ❤️

Not sure being a key figurehead for despair is a good thing but lol me

suddenly in a very purple place right now

one big reason i can recognise - a job application ffs, who gets this fried over a fucking job application? probably lots of people tbrr

other stuff is i don't know, feel like i'm waking up to myself a bit, not unpleasant but gee there's a lot of mess and the effort of picking up the semi-metaphorical mop and bucket - sometimes the darkness of the thought of how to avoid all forms of work feels like a huge overreaction and yet there's the thought

lie down and die or start climbing even if your odds of even making foothills feels nooo way

anyway i'm ok. just a note to say i'm ok but i might be blissfully mostly shut up for a bit