Boobs, I mean, Bras, and the eternal frustration

the padded underwire bra is key to my wardrobe for going out to the club, etc. it's uh, related to being plus-size and single

ha, i really don't like nipples poking out so I am pro a lightly padded bra. Bralettes kind of don't 'pull the room together' for me.

after six months of HRT i'm finally getting to the point where i feel like i can branch out from the padded camis i've been wearing aaaand we're all supposed to be on lockdown, which sort of puts the kibosh on my plans to get professionally fitted... i have no idea what my cup size is. i tried using the calculator for abrathatfits and it said i was a d cup, which i don't think so??? turns out that calculator is apparently just hot garbage for amabs.

i guess at some point i should just start ordering random brassieres off the internet and seeing how they fit.

cup sizes got totally warped by bad writing. If you measured your band size and across the top of your breasts and it said you are a D cup you are probably a D cup.

some of the cup size issue w/r/t bras in terms of fitting also depends on boob layout, as it were. In terms of interior decor, playing off the "pull the room together" thing -- if your boobs are laid out like furniture kept to the sides of the room with more open space in the middle, some bras don't fit all that comfortably. As opposed to boobs that leave more space between the furniture and the walls.

yeah, i got fitted in a professional shop where they just look at you topless and know your size and I was a D cup despite me thinking my boobs were b-c. It is all about the open floor plan.

I’m not embarrassed about the underwire and padding, I’m embarrassed of myself. I saw a photo the other day from my early 20s and my boobs were like up by my chin (exaggeration) it was just unnatural and weird for me.

Kate, I def recommend going somewhere to be fitted, when it’s possible again. I REALLY thought I’d read all the articles, done all the measurements, and knew my bra size - I was quite wrong! Shape is really important too. When I finally got fitted last year, I tried on like 100 bras in the same size and only a handful really worked for me.

I prefer a lightly lined cup too, I have piercings that are just for me, not the whole world to see.

Also, I went to small local boutique that is openly trans-friendly and fat-friendly, which made me feel a lot more comfortable. Hopefully there’s somewhere like that near you.

well, if i can't find a trans-friendly and fat-friendly clothing boutique in portland oregon i will be sad :(

Haven’t worn a bra since the last day I was at work three weeks ago. Unsure how I can ever go back. Been freeboobing through multiple videocalls; the angle doesn’t reach the nipples so I’m not concerned that I’ve been “exposed”

i bought a new brand of bra (new for me) online & it arrived and it FITS

that never happens! it barely happens in person ffs lol

i feel like i should get an award!

I'd classify that as an actual miracle tbh! I have happily gone 100% stretchy Bali no wire elasto-squooshers.

yay both of you! seriously, with covid/work from home, putting on an underwire bra is like "an event" the way putting on a cocktail dress and doing fancy eye makeup used to be. Needless to say ... I don't think I've worn a cocktail dress and done fancy eye makeup in almost 11 months?

i was just feeling like my saggy supportless boobs needed some help

wacoal awareness was the one i got. no frills, v supportive but not like matronly

ooooh good to know!

I think I’ve found the holy grail bra?????

I saw a fat fashion blogger raving about this bra, but it’s pricey as fuck so I put it on the wishlist for my mother in law (she’s the best - she demands a wishlist for Xmas/birthday) and she ended up buying me one.

https://evelynbobbie.com/products/defy-bra

Its:
Wireless
Seamless
Has amazing lift (as much lift as my wired Elomi bra)
Is insanely comfortable

I was dubious at first bc I could barely get it down over my shoulders then chest, but once it was on - it’s so weird bc it feels supportive but somehow there’s no tightness or pressure anywhere??? It’s fucking magic. I was kinda worried about sizing since it’s not adjustable anywhere but I’m a 38G/GG and I got the 2XL and it’s perfect.

Worth every penny but they also have a 20% discount on first orders if you sign up for the newsletter. I’m gonna but at least two more. I don’t know if I can wear any other bra again.

After a traumatic go with a similar Spanx bra, I've actively avoided styles like this, but I'm interested to try this one after reading how it's working for you! I see they offer one with hardware for back and straps too, if needed. Do you find the lower edge rolling up at all?

Yeah the band does roll a little - I emailed them to ask if that meant I needed a different size and she replied that it wasn’t an issue they’d encountered during testing but they’d received similar reports

“We have heard feedback from customers who experience the band rolling, and our designer is aware of the issue. Some women find that after wearing it and "breaking it in" the band is more malleable and flips up less. We believe it has to do with length of torso, and also ribcage projection.”

I have a really short waist so I think that might be the issue

If clothing rolls, it will always roll on me.

I'm also short-waisted, so maybe that's why it seems to happen.

I'm giving a tentative thumbs up to the most recent Torrid wire-free bras -- I'm a D so idk how they work for larger sizes, though they definitely carry them -- also on sale

The only thing is: As a non-binary person, I *like* the bolted-on feeling that underwires give me.