love* in the time of plague (and by love* i mean brexit* and other dreary matters of uk politics)

psyched for this brave new world tbh

not sure the police are going to be relishing trying to enforce this stuff, let alone have the resources for it

Can't understand why the military are not being put out, tbh.

Seems like people jammed into supermarkets and trains is more of an issue than everyone going to the park at the same time and these measures aren't really going to make much of a difference there

Where's Ant Middleton when you need him?

I know, New Zealand.

not sure the police are going to be relishing trying to enforce this stuff, let alone have the resources for it

― ymo sumac (NickB), Monday, 23 March 2020 bookmarkflaglink

They'll be under pressure once there are pics of more people raiding shelves and guess who is going to be pay for it?

A bunch of the dumbest dog owners on the planet are now arguing that ‘exercise once daily’ is about dogs AND humans. In my humble but correct opinion it’s not exercise if you have to pick up something’s poop.

Meanwhile, bosses at Sports Direct have told staff this evening they intend to keep their stores open because they believe they are “uniquely well placed to help keep the UK as fit and healthy as possible during this crisis”, the Press Association is reporting.

Mike Ashley, right?

yeah, let’s nationalise him too

is there a transcript of the speech or a list of what will/won't be allowed so we can find out how not to break the new laws without having to watch that awful man?

I've been trying to go to the shops less but we're not very good at it, which is no excuse but we don't have much storage space and we live right opposite a small supermarket so we've got fairly used to going nearly every day. it's going to be a hard habit to break

also right now they have sod all in stock so it's hard to stock up when you do go. we have rice and cereal and tinned soups but hardly any fruit/veg/meat and it'd be pretty boring but we'd live for a week or two, I guess, especially if (god forbid etc) ill and appetite-suppressed - but more than that is right out and online supermarket deliveries are booked up until the end of their booking calendars in May

transcript here:

https://www.gov.uk/search/news-and-communications?topical_events%5B%5D=coronavirus-covid-19-uk-government-response

detailed guidance here:

https://www.gov.uk/search/all?topical_events%5B%5D=coronavirus-covid-19-uk-government-response&order=updated-newest

thanks!

Posting part of this email I got from Paperchase here partly for me and partly for anvil:

Like many other businesses across the UK, over the last couple of weeks we’ve been working hard to find the balance between following government policy, looking after our customers, and of course doing the best we can for all of our Paperchase colleagues.

We’ve stayed open until today as we really felt it was the right thing to do. We wanted to ensure that our customers were able to send their nearest and dearest the kind of warm Mother’s Day wishes that mean so much at this difficult time.

However, the time has now come to temporarily close our stores while the nation, and the wider world, deals with this unprecedented crisis. This is a step we feel we have to take in order to protect the health and wellbeing of our teams and our customers, and play our part in limiting the pressure put on our NHS.

While our stores have now closed, it goes without saying that paperchase.com remains very much open for business. You’ll find everything you need to while away the hours at home, and much more, 24/7 at paperchase.com.

Our values include being playful, being fresh thinkers, being bold and being kind. It has never been more important for us to live by these as we try and stay true to our goal of spreading a little joy every day.

Boris Johnson with the hair of Covid-19. pic.twitter.com/A9o0yMNh2n

— Football Manager Hair on Politicians (@visualsatire) March 23, 2020

xp I've learned a lot that I didn't want to about which shops refer to their employees as 'Partners'

Thanks to thomp for that link, just trudging through the bill now: as usual the things that the civil servants have thought to protect the government against serves as a menu of horrors to come.

Disclosure Scotland: PVG offences
The ability to enable the Scottish Ministers, during the period of a declared national emergency or pandemic attributed to an outbreak of coronavirus, to suspend the offence provisions applying to organisational employers and personnel suppliers in Part 1 of the Protection of Vulnerable Groups (Scotland) Act 2007 (the 2007 Act).

Rationale for intervention
In the event of an emergency, the Disclosure services will need to continue to operate in a way that enables the protection of children and vulnerable adult. The purpose of this is to avoid inadvertently criminalising healthcare employers like the NHS during the emergency period if they employ a barred person to do regulated work (for instance, if there has been insufficient time to obtain a PVG check in advance).

Other policy options considered?
There would be an option of ‘do nothing’, however, the route of dis-applying these PVG offences is favoured as a way of ensuring health services can recruit the people they need to quickly without fear of legal repercussions.

Key considerations
This is devolved.

The government document actually has a long list of exceptions:

Supermarkets and other food shops, health shops, pharmacies including non- dispensing pharmacies, petrol stations, bicycle shops, home and hardware shops, laundrettes and dry cleaners, bicycle shops, garages, car rentals, pet shops, corner shops, newsagents, post offices, and banks.

Someone loves their bicycle shops.

if garages can stay open, why not bike shops? it's a lot of people's mode of transport to work and -to a lesser extent- the shops and it's better for physical distancing than shared cars, taxis, buses and trains. and that inclusion also supports the option to ride your bike in a socially distant way once a day

No no I'm delighted, for all those reasons! I was worried yesterday that if anything happens to my bike, I'd have to fix it myself. It's just on the list twice, is all.

lol

that was a bit stereotypically cyclisty of a response tbf nick

oh right okay, i didn't spot that!

xp yes i'm sorry deems, my head is bowed in shame (but luckily i'm wearing my helmet to protect it from future kneejerk responses)

Andrew Farrell: i worked at disclosure Scotland.in normal times it can take 2 weeks for a disclosure to be completed. This was with hot-desking at banks of desks without much room between people and having people completing checks 24/7 (early, back,and nightshifts). Highly unlikely that there wont be huge delays. Wfh wouldnt be an option as the job requires checking both the scottish CHS and england/wales PNC

friend of mine (who has an auto-immune disorder) just got one of these today

🖼

The military need to be on our streets, in our supermarkets, in our hospitals NOW and it is a disgrace that this is not the case. This should have been done tonight. There's no way the police can deal with the number of selfish c*nts the UK has. What are we paying £40+s billions a year for, if not this?

Italian police: Fines people for gathering outside

Russia police: throws people in jail for 5 years

UK Police: pic.twitter.com/NlFdUvoCX3

— Timeline Terrorist (@Timeline2019) March 23, 2020

You can say "come on lads, you know you're not supposed to be doing this, you're gonna have to disperse now"

I realise it's a risk, moving forward and probably not a very popular opinion here but there's no way a "come on lads" approach is ever going to work in this fkng country. In most countries, Spain and Italy included, the line between the police and the military is a bit more blurred.

Jim - I'm not disagreeing with it, I'm more impressed I suppose that someone has thought "if we do this then that will happen, we should get some indemnity"

Hate these rules already tbh, yes they needed to be made in a hurry, but broadbrush curbs like this are draconian and dumb, and are just going to stir up resentment in the long term. Going to be a field day for all the little Hitlers out there spying their neighbours, but really - what for instance is the difference in effect between going for one hour long walk, and popping out for one short stroll in the morning and another one at end of the day? And what does it really achieve to apply these rules that may make sense in the context of central London, to a person living in a cottage up a mountain in the middle of nowhere? We're going to have months of fretting over interpretation and people coming up with dodges of one sort or another. If it was strict controls on people's physical proximity to each other, something like you're not allowed within more than 3 metres of anyone else in a open space, that would be easily understandable and would achieve the actual goal of social distancing. That's what they're basically going to be monitoring anyway, or rather, all that they can monitor at the moment, unless of course they start introducing the phone tracking that has been mooted in other countries. Maybe over the next couple of weeks they could devolve arrangements to councils / local police forces so that the rules can be set to suit local circumstances without inflicting widescale misery quite needlessly.

This is my tube this morning. I live in zone 4 and work in a zone 1 hospital. I love my job, but now I'm risking my health just on the journey in?!@SadiqKhan put the tube service back to normal so we can all spread out, or @BorisJohnson start policing who's getting on. Help me! pic.twitter.com/x5moYM8wWN

— Nicola Smith (@nsmith694) March 24, 2020

yes, that's exactly the stuff that needs a addressing urgently! and supermarket shopping - if we can't get home deliveries, just give everyone a fucking timeslot already. surname starts with a b? monday afternoons every other week. i don't want to have to guess when the shop is going to be empty

nickB, what's your take on going for a ride and the government's guidance that "exercise outside by bike once per day" is allowed? will you still be riding outside?

Although i’m jogging at the moment (as i have done for a while), i hate it, so will be going out on my bike once a week at the weekend as well. seems like it’s totally within current guidelines.

xp been lecturing my cycling-addicted son constantly about that. fine to ride your bike, just don't do anything where there's more risk of getting injured - no caning it down descents, take it steady if you're going offroad, no more night-riding, don't start hitting the local bmx track, etc. go out by yourself and as ever check over your shoulder first before clearing your nasal passages. road riding is better because if you're going mountain biking round here, there's gate every half a mile and i think there's a real risk of infection there. car drivers have already felt the need to start yelling at cyclists to stay home though, so watch out for those entitled pricks. my son's mates went out in a group of three at the weekend and they kept getting beeped at. have rigged up a system at home where there's a plastic bag outside the door with some wipes in it so bill can take off his gloves and stick them in the bag when he gets back, then wipe his hands and grips before he comes in, so we're taking stuff like that super seriously. i'm going to be running mostly though myself - can fit in more effort in a given time, and can stay fairly local

agreed with that, all seems sensible. am swithering about continuing riding outside on the road myself - with all the shop, cafe etc closures this weekend there were definitely more cars on quieter roads out accessing trails, walks etc. hadn't factored that into my risk assessment when I went out - was nearly hit twice by two close-passing beepers (on roads which are normally dead, and idyllic for cycling.) certainly won't be riding anything over 30 miles though. bit a shiter all in really

What this volatile mix of self-righteous, aggressive paranoia needs now is tooled-up squaddies on every street corner.

always found them a very decent sort ourselves

In the industrial-ish bit of Sheffield I work in it's business as usual. Everything is open and it's like any normal day of the week. If shops are shut why are industrial units putting together sofas and double glazed windows still open?

Omg it's t-shirt weather today, the lock-down is ruined. I can tell some of the local bed manufacturers here are still operating, at least I can hear that distant forklift reverse beep and beds is the only manufacturing industry here. Have a word with your dad Baroness Warsi!

People who have messaged me who’re being told by their bosses to go into work tomorrow include:
Construction workers
WHSmith & JD Sports staff
Debt collectors
Airplane manufacturers

(I kid you not)

This is madness. And the government is allowing it.

— CarolineJMolloy (@carolinejmolloy) March 23, 2020

debt collectors wtf, hope they collect a dose tbf

some fucking strange definitions of Key Workers still being used last night.

On that, spot the difference:

They literally changed the advice on @10DowningStreet pic.twitter.com/gBnVLG8mJR

— Louise (@McAttackL) March 24, 2020

Some of that hypertargeted social media Dominic Cummings sorcery might actually work for some constructive and useful purpose right now but apparently this supposed master of the art of communication has completely lost the ability to communicate effectively. It's almost as if weirdos from William Gibson novels aren't actually much use in a global health emergency.

yeah but the russians aren't assisting this time round - no need, everything's collapsing without their input

they've even got millions in free ad credits on FB that they can't be arsed using, he'd have grabbed them with both hands during the Leave/GE19 campaigns, so it shows where his priorities lie.

I guess there's no point, people aren't spending much time on the internet right now.

There's also an argument that unambiguous mass communication is more important right now but if they could manage to go Get Brexit Done every ten seconds you'd think they'd be able to go Stay At Home a bit more, and maybe a week or so earlier?

exactly, and whatever happened to 'no more dither and delay'? they've been masters of it these past couple of weeks

When you load up twitter/fb/insta in the Netherlands, at the very top is a "to stay informed w/ trusted info visit X" which redirects to the Dutch research institute for public health. I'm guessing that's what those free ad credits get you?

I can tell some of the local bed manufacturers here are still operating

well, "home shops" are still open, and I need a new bed. I was thinking after last night's news that I wouldn't be able to get one now and then I saw the words "home shops" on the list. but this also seems a poor time to go and lie on a succession of publicly-available beds to try them out, so I will probably still not buy a bed

I've been working from home but most of my job (the familiar and comfortable bits) is to support frontline staff who can't work from home, so not quite sure what will happen now they're officially being sent home too.

from my boss's communications I think there's a good chance I'll still be paid for something, and I realise many people aren't in such a good position, but it still feels weird, having a job which is 2% Online! Digital! Now High Priority! (btw I have no idea how to deal with most of the stuff that might now arise through this formerly tiny part of my job) and 98% no longer relevant, and wondering how that's going to work.

Some of that hypertargeted social media Dominic Cummings sorcery might actually work for some constructive and useful purpose right now but apparently this supposed master of the art of communication has completely lost the ability to communicate effectively. It's almost as if weirdos from William Gibson novels aren't actually much use in a global health emergency.

Isn't about time we had free broadband btw?