BREAKING UP - this is the strangest breakup I ever had.

I only asked her to tell me when something's wrong instead of quietly simmering. That means, if I ask, "Is something wrong?" she can't respond with, "I'm fine" in a tone that means "fuck you." The rest is mutual "work". Neither of us has to do more than the other person.

My gf's 'silent treatment' is imperious but fair. If she doesn't want to talk about it, she tells me exactly that. When she does, we do. This works but it can be terrifying.