Rolling US Economy Into The Shitbin Thread

i mean to shift it that way for a few days to a week, then put it back to 100% stock

I would not feel confident I would come out ahead in that venture, this is what I pay the animated corpse of John Bogle for

or you should buy a horse and boat.

my terrible secret is that only I can stop the stock market collapse. as soon as i pull my money out, the market will bounce back up 5-10%. then, when i put my money back in, it will resume freefall

If you can weather it, now does not seem to be the time to sell, unless you're gambling that things will get much, much worse and stay that way. Which they may! But the market was also really, really inflated and overdue (as far as that goes) for some sort of correction. The best bet, for anyone nowhere near retirement, would probably be to do nothing. Or actually to take advantage of any lowered rates and refinance their home or whatever.

A good fund should be hoovering up discount stocks, though I guess any major movement in that direction would help staunch the market's fall, right?

xp, god, you have no idea how much i want to do that

so many times i have been tempted to just take all my retirement out, take the tax penalty, and cancel out my student debt, which is almost the same. then i will truly be worthless and free

i thought about my retirement account last week so i don't have to think about it now

do you have the cash to put into the account and hold it until the bottom hits? once bottom hits buy buy buy

(I have been holding my contributions in my IRA as cash for the last 5 months or so, rather than buy buy buy)

because you can't time the market

the market times YOU.

*winks knowingly*

Stop! Market time!
https://media.giphy.com/media/11rIergnpiYpvW/giphy.gif

i'm just gonna increase my contribution %

I'm kind of glad Blue Apron did so poorly. I really never understood who used that for extended periods of time. It seemed expensive for what it was.

silby otm

yeah that's definitely in my schadenfreude category

Blue Apron turned a lot of investor money into podcasts and I salute their efforts

i'm 100% eStork let's goooo

there should be a stock you can buy that goes up when people make bad posts

surely this is exactly why pension funds etc automatically move to cash/bonds for the last couple of years. if you have a decade or three to go just sit tight. it’s a long game!

If you have a retirement account through your employer, there are advisors you should be able to access for free who know what they’re talking about

i'm in the same account as millions of other feds. the advisors have been replaced with maga trolls who make fart noises with their hands cupped to their armpits whenever you try to call them

anyway, it doesn't matter. the deadline to change allocations for monday was about 30 minutes ago, so i'm all in for monday

endless growth, exponential, for 30 years, that's what we're all counting on

shit! that sucks, man, sorry. I guess they’re all getting hosed now anyway

yeah, it's ok. it's just a bunch of money i diligently stored away in my 20s and early 30s, rather than saving up to buy a house or pay off my student loans

this way, when i'm old enough to retire i can finally use that money to pay off my student loans and buy a tent in some rich guy's garden

i hope this doesn't harsh mr. trump's south carolina rally tonight

And to think people laughed when I told them I planned to drop dead of a stress-induced heart attack well before I hit retirement age. Who's laughinnnngGKKKKHHHH

I'm kind of glad Blue Apron did so poorly. I really never understood who used that for extended periods of time. It seemed expensive for what it was.

― Yerac, Friday, 28 February 2020 17:03 (one hour ago) link

I've literally met two people ever who used Blue Apron -- my neighbors who are sort of adventurous empty nester types, and this one really sad single male lawyer in his late 30s.

i hope this doesn't harsh mr. trump's south carolina rally tonight

nah. he'll just call stock traders a bunch of stupid scaredy-cats who can't see how beautifully the economy is doing, really beautifully. but it's probably because the lying liberal media has been filling up their heads with scary lies about the Chi-nuh virus, and the crowd will lap it up, and howl with delight.

I don’t think he’ll call stock traders stupid

because he'll exercise self-restraint?

All this needs is the Price is Right mountain climber and a little yodel music. pic.twitter.com/r6RCBj8I5H

— Kevin M. Kruse (@KevinMKruse) February 28, 2020

closing below 25,000 for the first time since spring 2019? oh my! monday may be something

nah it rebounded a few hundred before close

gonna be an interesting Monday

injecting money into a plunging market in the final minutes before the close is an old tactic to bolster confidence going into the weekend. makes me wonder who arranged it and whose money was injected.

might have something to do with the announcement that the Trump admin is gonna combat coronavirus with tax cuts

no joke

https://www.washingtonpost.com/business/2020/02/28/trump-coronavirus-tax-cuts/

That was literally an article on a Danish satirical site.

further proof that satire is dead

maga

btw Trump is currently blaming the crash on Bernie Sanders, I think

I blame ilx hysteria and the trade bots that sample it.

wait till he hears about ilx eschatology

we're like the cryptocurrency advocates to the capitalist ilx norm market

https://i.redd.it/7slyqtc3nge01.png

the fibers feel empty inside (because they're air core)

buy! buy! buy!

brilliant buyer

super seller