itt: paintings that are plot-points in movies and TV that are terrible paintings (or excellent ones if there are any)

I would love to do like a 'shreds' variation on a painting biopic, played completely straight in every respect except that the paintings are fucking awful and are in no way representative of the actual artist's work.

The estates of Picasso, Pollock, and Francis Bacon all forbade filmmakers from using the respective artists' work in the films, so the producers had to make knock offs for them all.

Like imagine a sweeping historical drama about Caravaggio and every one of his paintings featured in the film is a close-up of a butthole.

i've been trying to find more of the category i associate best of the badness with: where we encounter a portrait in which a strong rememblance between a living character and the painting implies some dark connection or creepiness or obsession

(vertigo is an example of this, indeed probably a major inspiration for copycat plots, and coppola's dracula is another -- i'm sure there's a bunch of hammer horrors with relevant portraits in them)

i was faintly appalled that this shit-ass painting featured prominently in an episode of watchmen wasn’t created for the show

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/b/b4/Comanche_Feats_of_Horsemanship-George_Catlin.jpg

lol, I kinda love how shit-ass that painting is.

The painting of the first wife in two mrs Carrolls is pretty dire:

https://www.thefilmsinmylife.com/2018/10/the-artwork-in-two-mrs-carrolls-1947.html?m=1

look i just think that if you’re gonna devote yourself to creating semi-racist to fully-racist depictions of the lives of native americans you should at least put a bit of effort in xp

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-J0sip_yMWak/UI2PZWxoziI/AAAAAAAAE3M/pBWWP6f35lA/s320/tumblr_lin3euFMJ51qzr3ueo1_r2_500.gif

fake Inchbold

https://i2.wp.com/morseandlewisandendeavour.com/wp-content/uploads/2017/02/vlcsnap-2017-02-07-20h19m59s450.jpg?w=730&ssl=1

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-tYmsVY1-6vM/T8L4fU3xqtI/AAAAAAAAABc/5fqbqCyQZcE/s1600/Chaos.jpg

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-MQbyqoOWgZ8/T8L4f6md0YI/AAAAAAAAABk/m4FfNf4ym2Y/s1600/Control.jpg

Is...is that a unicorn in the top right of the Comanche painting?

controversial YBA Tom Baker in Vault of Horror

https://bigcomicpage.files.wordpress.com/2018/05/32714424_1691226590931862_2686949798283575296_n.jpg

Obviously this is awesome http://www.triplezed.com/blog/the-art-of-3-men-and-a-baby

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AAU0BBG5-hw

https://i.ytimg.com/vi/-gWP9Fck4C0/hqdefault.jpg

Fritz Lang's The Woman In The Window:

https://images.app.goo.gl/w7oD3RLbBgwuQgpx8

Must make a note not to hotlink from blogspot again, it looks like you've posted it successfully, but nope.

anyway, these

https://i.imgur.com/BArZRir.jpg

https://i.imgur.com/4Du2JsA.jpg

and this one

https://i.imgur.com/DCDLIEA.gif

i give you... raul julia as m bison in street fighter

https://cdn1us.denofgeek.com/sites/denofgeekus/files/styles/article_width/public/street_fighter-1.jpg?itok=OyOrqnl2

christopher walken and christopher walken’s large adult son in batman returns

https://cdn1us.denofgeek.com/sites/denofgeekus/files/styles/article_width/public/batman_returns_0.jpg?itok=o9Xn9NUu

The Witch painting spooked me as a kid. I think there’s an MR James story with a changing painting too?

This is the only evidence I can find online of the painting from Fulci's The Beyond:

@MondoNews who do I have to sleep with to at least get a high quality print of Schweick's painting from Fulci's The Beyond?!!!#luciofulci #thebeyond #sevengatesofhell #eibon pic.twitter.com/DcBgOWulX3

— Robert McQueen (@mcqueen_robert) October 8, 2019

The Witches, I should say (xpost)

yeah dowd the James story is "The Mezzotint"

Ah, thanks! I think I read it about the same time I saw the Witches, I remember it having quite an effect on me.

Abel Ferrara's shit painting of a buffalo features heavily in Driller Killer, drives him over the edge in fact. So blame the fucking buffalo, not him.

https://themovieelite.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/03/driller-killer-buffalo-painting-1200x520.jpg

Wish I could find the story I read as a kid of somebody putting together a jigsaw with no picture on the box that gradually turned out to be a creepy green fungal looking house and when they put the last piece in they found themself inside this place and whatever lived there ate them

this is probably the wrong thread but the way crap artist Julian Schnabel weaves himself into his Basquiat movie (played by Gary Oldman) is so vain and bad and nauseating!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3QKxIxEyDPg

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/36/57/01/3657015abcdf953625915c6a82c2852a.png

As far as TV shows go, the portrait in Schitt’s Creek is excellent.

https://frinkiac.com/img/S02E18/1229677.jpg

https://i.etsystatic.com/5851351/r/il/8a7050/370274291/il_570xN.370274291_d67a.jpg

https://www.jewishexponent.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/02/creek1.jpg

Noodle, your story sounds interesting and it got me Googling. This isn't it, but seems like a variant:

https://www.wattpad.com/1796672-a-collection-of-short-scary-stories-the-strangest

https://flintstones.fandom.com/wiki/Adobe_Dick

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/EP9aBRtWoAELZ4p?format=jpg

i've been trying to find more of the category i associate best of the badness with: where we encounter a portrait in which a strong resemblance between a living character and the painting implies some dark connection or creepiness or obsession

cousin Barnabas from England looks so much like his ancestor

https://www.syfy.com/sites/syfy/files/styles/2480x1400/public/wire/legacy/dark-shadows-jonathan-frid-barnabas-collins.jpg

Terrible paintings, you say?

https://i.imgur.com/kQCNena.png

https://dailyscribbling.files.wordpress.com/2013/01/hound1939-18.jpg

Vincent Price inherits The Haunted Palace from the guy in this portrait:

https://m.media-amazon.com/images/M/MV5BY2QzN2Q1YWQtNjk1NC00ZTk2LWJkNDAtZjY1OTM1ZTY1YzlmXkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyNzc5NjM0NA@@._V1_.jpg

The painting in 'Batteries Not Included' is a plot point (and also NSFW so I'm not posting it in this thread).

it’s not nsfw if it’s art, dahling

I was looking for a photo of the painting in the new Dracula, but got down a rabbit hole of fan art from which I've had to escape as quickly as possible

https://www.pinterest.com/pin/156500155779080396/

https://i.stack.imgur.com/NmYqV.jpg
the thread-starter

https://images-na.ssl-images-amazon.com/images/I/41kat8xhScL.jpg
I've always found the painting in Picard's ready room to be rather lame

I’m having a hard time finding link-able jpgs of the ones I’ve been thinking of, specifically the one of Vince Vaughn nude from Wedding Crashers and the portraits of Alan Rickman and Mos Def from the end of Something the Lord Made

Tom Selleck film Daughters of Satan (1972) where he buys a painting for his wife, but one of the witches in the painting looks just like his wife

3rd image down:
https://thedrunkenodyssey.com/2016/06/10/the-curator-of-schlock-132-daughters-of-satan/

I really liked The Devil's Candy but not so much for the painting
https://twocentspluschange.files.wordpress.com/2017/08/the-devils-candy.jpg

The painting of the woman on fire does the same thing as the music, though? It helps her remember and relive what happened. It's not Vivaldi, sure, but what is?

this old ep of "law and order" ("hands free") has some very schnabel-y art in it, but i can't find pictures on the internet :(

There was another Morse 🎨 last night, the lad knows what he likes

Have we talked about The Sandpiper yet?

https://i.pinimg.com/originals/41/11/ef/4111efc1282e423f96a6436d46e1f609.png

Schalcken the painter (1979) incorporates a lot of his paintings, but the one the story centres around had to be created for the film. It’s described in the opening of LeFanu’s story:

There exists, at this moment, in good preservation a remarkable work of Schalken's. The curious management of its lights constitutes, as usual in his pieces, the chief apparent merit of the picture. I say apparent, for in its subject, and not in its handling, however exquisite, consists its real value. The picture represents the interior of what might be a chamber in some antique religious building; and its foreground is occupied by a female figure, in a species of white robe, part of which is arranged so as to form a veil. The dress, however, is not that of any religious order. In her hand the figure bears a lamp, by which alone her figure and face are illuminated; and her features wear such an arch smile, as well becomes a pretty woman when practicing some prankish roguery; in the background, and, excepting where the dim red light of an expiring fire serves to define the form, in total shadow, stands the figure of a man dressed in the old Flemish fashion, in an attitude of alarm, his hand being placed upon the hilt of his sword, which he appears to be in the act of drawing.

https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/6/61/Attempted_restoration_of_Ecce_Homo.jpg/170px-Attempted_restoration_of_Ecce_Homo.jpg https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/d/d1/Smiling_girl_%28Fake_Vermeer%29.jpg/220px-Smiling_girl_%28Fake_Vermeer%29.jpg

Was about to post the goodfellas dog painting but then re-read the og post. Do you know the story behind that? I love it so much.

only that it's by nicholas pileggi's mom (he's the journalist who wrote the original book the film's based on) and it's inspired by a photo in (i think) national geographic

Since this thread was last active, I re-watched Corman's Fall of the House of Usher, which has some really quite effective portrait paintings by Majorie Cameron associate Burt Shonberg, as shown here:

http://www.johncoulthart.com/feuilleton/2013/04/13/burt-shonbergs-poe-paintings/

love this thread, might spend my evening re-living it

Another painter from Marjorie Cameron's circle is Renate Druks, a Viennese emigre who moved to the US. She was close to Anais Nin, and also involved in the film world through acting in Kenneth Anger's Inauguration of the Pleasure Dome (one of her party events provided the inspiration for the film). She also had some role in providing art work for Curtis Harrington's film 'Games':

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-uLIw2QJR2Es/UT-oof1c_JI/AAAAAAAABG4/6Zjc2KHnqhg/s640/games_21.png

http://www.johncoulthart.com/feuilleton/wp-content/uploads/2013/04/usher6-big.jpg

Lemmy on the naughty step in hell for wearing a nazi hat!

Mr Turner

https://www.filmaffinity.com/us/filmimages.php?movie_id=324035

(dangit!)

truly cursed!

Try that again.

https://www.filmaffinity.com/us/filmimages.php?movie_id=324035

I say! Time to give up the ghost!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4jQLgZLaEUo

rewatching goodfellas and just reached the painting :)

(its good not bad)

https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f257383d68fbe07dae9c644/35d1e27e-2a4c-4cd7-8688-115a3a0ccd88/3f827875174021d97c4bd9f04a4fe85c.jpg

https://darkshadowseveryday.files.wordpress.com/2016/03/strange-paradise-portrait.jpg